I don’t NEED you I WANT you
Are you making me wait for you or are you having fun playing with my emotions? You know, or should know, how I feel about you. My whole body and soul ache, to finally feel your arms around me. I see you and my legs feel like they are going to buckle. I want you…
I’d much rather stay single
Man, the single women in this town are FUCKED UP. I have yet to meet one who’s neither an airhead, a psycho bitch, money grubbing, pretentious, nor 30-50 pounds overweight. A prime case of proof that quality singles are scarce happened to me this weekend. I went out with about seven friends and their girlfriends…
Parking lots?
What’s with these damn idiots who enjoy backing into cars in parking lots and leave absolutely no insurance, name or phone number information! Do these morons realize this becomes very expensive on the injured damn car and hard on the person’s god damn pocket book. And, further more let’s throw the insurance company into the…
Passive aggressive
I think I’ve finally realized that no matter how much I love you, this will never, ever, ever work. How can it? You can’t take the slightest criticism. I can’t even tell you to put your seat belt on. I’m really trying here but it’s a lost cause. You’ll never change. You do this to…
I’m not fishing for brats
I don’t know what possessed you to bring three small children with you while fishing down at McCormack’s, dude in polo shirt. Kids want to go to the beach? Great, take them to the beach, right around the corner. You drove the rest of the crowd down there crazy yelling at them to behave, which…
Hypocrites
Hypocrites. I hate them. The fundamentalists are the worst. Preaching family values while disowning your own for having their own views. Leaving a marriage because you want to without giving it a fair shake. Giving it the chance you preach to other people. Preaching the love we should have for our neighbours while slamming “the…
Saved my life (probably)
To the guy who picked me up from the side of the street when I was completely drunk and bawling about losing my sister (I found her!) and drove me home, thank you. I could have been taken advantage of by anyone and I wasn’t even sure if you were a cab (you weren’t), but…
Thank you for helping two blind people to be together
Thank you to all the amazing bus drivers that drive the 82, 87, 66, 10 and especially the 54 and 80… you folks, have made it possible for my fiancé who has very little navigational and blind cane skills and whose sight completely fails after dusk, to get across the HRM from East Dartmouth to…
Jackhammer versus sleep
OK, so there is alot of construction going on in north end Dartmouth particularly my street and Monday through Friday I have to endure the loud constant jackhammering, bulldozers, dump trucks and other construction-related noises until the end of October possibly November as you say. I’m not bitching about your job and that you have…
Four days
Four days my love, four days till we finally get to be together forever, to not have to see you do the trek from across the HRM, two hours on buses, and before that the hundreds of hours we spent on skype, being 1,800km from one another, your faith in our dream, your love for…
Dartmouth Terminal thank you
I am someone who used to live deep in the heart of Dartmouth for several years and twice a day had to take a bus to and from Halifax. Oftentimes (several times a week) I would be coming back from Halifax and catching one of the last buses into Dartmouth from the sportsplex. I have…
Certain student politician
Way to be elected for student government at a certain school. Way to get a head of your future political career by already being a cheater. I’m tired, I work, I have extra curricular activities—but only the ones I can handle without paying people to write my papers for me. You didn’t get my vote…
To my co-workers
I’m new to this business and it’s been a stressful journey since I started this job. I’m up all night worrying about the direction of our little shop and I’m trying my hardest to please everyone. Still, there are more than a few days when I have to be strict or when I have to…
iPod love
To the wonderful soul who found my iPod on Friday and Facebooked me saying you had it—THANK YOU. I’m clumsy at the best of times and have lost two iPods before in exactly this way, I figured this was it for this one as well. Hope restored! —Tunes Forever
Put it back
There was a sign on Monastery Lane that said “cats.” There were also a bunch of cats hanging out. Now the sign is gone and I bet those kittens aren’t going to know where to meet anymore, they’re probably hanging out in bars in Fairview or something now. Thanks a lot assholes. Put it back…
Some love for all
What’s it gonna take for all of us together to see that this life is simply an experience and that the essence of who we truly are is consciousness having this experience? How could you possibly deny that this is quite nearly the most accurate description of what it is to be living this life.…
Calling in sick
You’re a repeat offender. You got balls to call in right before you are suppose to work and disrupt my family holiday. Hope you have a doctor’s note. You are now on my shit list. —A.D.
Inconsequential poorly written thank you fragment
Hey, we’ve been true friends for three years, and I truly appreciate your friendship. You are the only person I can truly be myself with, where all of the painful awkwardness disappears. I love your relentless optimism, it can transform even my most depressive days into happiness. You make me laugh without pause. Your innocence…
Trust-fund shoplifting jagoffs
Seriously. I’m standing right here. I’m looking at you, two feet away. Yes I saw you pocket that fuckin’ bar. Do you think I’m blind, or just stupid? You and your American Eagle dumbfuck friends should consider yourselves lucky that striking dipshits is a violation of the terms of my employment. I dare you to…
Death count rising
OK, so maybe a year ago it was somewhat ambiguous, but now after tens of thousands have been raped, murdered and displaced and it’s clear all the regime stands for is violence and power, how can you still display propaganda pictures of this most-evil middle eastern tyrant? And how can we all stand it? One…
Weenis has a mind of her own
To the driver of the 80 earlier this week: I’m guessing it was about 3:30 in the afternoon, I had just gotten off the highway in Bedford in my little green Hyundai Elantra (Her name is Weenis Vandini if you ever get to meet her) I was all tired and freaked out from a long…
Patronizing the driver gets you no where
Dear students who tried to get on the 1 on Saturday evening on Barrington Street: The bus driver was only doing his job by asking to see the front of the girl’s bus pass, to the young gentleman (and I use the term gentleman loosely) your side comment to your friends about the driver being…
Bettman is the effin problem
I’m not a huge hockey fan, but I am Canadian. I don’t route for one or the other, but I cheer the Leafs. Hockey is a soap opera like any other dramatic production and this latest nonsense is no different. I don’t care if you’re a fan or not, any Canadian can see that this…
You could just ask
To the two middle-aged women who couldn’t figure out my gender. Instead of following me around the store pointing, snickering and then one of you walk right up side me and gawk at my chest and package then giggle and give your friend the thumbs up. You could have been an adult and asked me.…
Let’s play the ignore game
Honestly I don’t deserve this shit. I feel invisible to you and it’s so unfair that you’ve left me hanging like this. We both know I’ve never been anything but nice to you and you have zero reason to ignore me, especially for this long. Two can play this game you know, but luckily for…
Yoga studio blues
Honestly, it’s really hard in this city to find groups and like-minded people who want to explore spirituality but, charging $200 to teach someone how to ground themselves and $15 for a meditation session, is the most dishonest thing I have ever encountered, and I should not just complain but be active within the community…
Keep your licence, I’d probably just road rage anyway
Dear higher-authority, I understand when someone gets pulled over for a ticket-able offence, it is what it is, contest it in court or pay the bill! I choose the latter. However! When someone acknowledges their mistake and pays their fine, it should be over with, you don’t need to throw salt in the wound; and…
Dear Spongebob Man
Come back and listen to that little wooden speaker with me again and I’ll get you that bag for your bag. —Wood Working Girl
The bus isn’t where they film Maury
To the woman on the bus who had the guts to tell off the couple who were loudly and profanely shouting and sobbing in front of several small children, thanks for doing what no one else did. Your fiery red hair matched the gusto with which you attempted to save young ears, so much respect.…
Future doctor man
Every now and then I catch you smiling at me… As much as I like the smiles, we should actually talk sometime! Don’t be shy, we could both use a study break. —Happily Accepting Smiles, For Now
I got you babes
I needed an afternoon coffee fix, but what I got was way more than I ever wanted… I saw you sharing more than americanos with “Mr. Moustache” at what was supposed to be “our spot”! You said, last week, I’ll “never be 100 percent in.” And, you’re right, if you insist on sharing yourself with…
The Food Wolf opens tonight!
The @TheFoodWolf folks have tweeted: Frantically prepping! Our local meat was delivered much later than expected so serving will begin at 7pm to late. As we reported last week, The Food Wolf will have three locations. Find them tonight behind the Bus Stop Theatre.
Summer is over
I was so hurt… that day I thought you’d dumped me. You said you weren’t ready for closeness and that I needed more from you than what you can give me. I felt so rejected and I didn’t know why I was being rejected… I felt like all the things I told you, and all…
Bowles on ice
Bowles Arena is a 40-year-old city-owned rink on a hill in the industrial area behind Dartmouth General Hospital. While aged, the facility is clean and in good shape, with newly painted bleachers and well-maintained ice. What Bowles Arena isn’t, however, is used, at least during weekday hours. While the physical plant runs all day to…
Isn’t it kind of funny
…this crazy crush I have on you. We’ve been hanging around each other through our mutual friends and you’re so warm and funny and comfortable in your own skin, I just enjoy being around you so much…and you probably don’t even know it. I don’t want to ruin a good thing, so I don’t mind…
Lazy gas price whiners
Yesterday afternoon, as I walked home from work, I saw a huge lineup at the gas station at Young and Robie. I had thought that perhaps, with gas due to go up 7 cents/litre, that I might go home, get my car, and come to that very station to fill up. Once I saw the…
When mama’s happy, you’ll be happy!
Can someone tell me what happens to guys after they say “I do”? You’ve suddenly turn into an unfeeling/seemingly uncaring morning groper. No more flowers, no more compliments, hardly a grunt when I speak to you. The TV gets more of your attention than I do! Haven’t you learned yet that when I’m happy, as…
Just thought I’d tie my shoe
I would just like to share how much I love the “couldn’t give a fuck” attitude the Metro Transit drivers seem to have. Standing directly in front of the bus stop, I bent over to tie my shoe. Whilst tying it, my bus decided to just drive right on by. I had not made eye…
Worst double blind date of my life
My friend started talking to this guy online. Eventually, they agreed to meet up at a pub for some drinks. She was nervous meeting him in person the first time, so she asked me to come along. She told me her date had a single friend of his own for me to meet. So I…
Get in the way of someone getting a job, and they’ll fuck your hubby!
You were working a temporary position with us. You and I worked really well together and we became friends. A couple of weeks before your job was going to end, you applied for another position within the company. When you announced to me about this position you applied for. Learning what it was, I knew…
180 metres is a joke!
It’s poaching season again in Nova Scotia! How come politicians and law makers think it’s okay for somebody to discharge a high-powered rifle 180 metres from my house? Do they think it won’t hurt if I get shot from 180 metres? People walk their children and dogs right past the crown land where these drunk…
Online classified ads
What is it with people who put up an ad looking for somebody to work. A person takes their time to send emails, resumes, telephone calls and they never get back to you OR when you do get in contact with them they sound very aggravated and say, can you call me back in an…
What happened to you?
What happened to you to cause such a drastic change in behaviour? I could spend a whole weekend with you and not even be tired of you by the end of it, we would laugh for days and chat and just all around have a great time. Now, I can’t bare to spend an evening…
Live-in desk has to go!
The office in general, and the desk/cubby assigned to you is not your home, or personal property. It is not meant to be a shrine of personal nicknacks, photos, dirty dishes, stacks of old newspapers, piles of dis-guarded shoes/clothes and god knows what else. I’m not against having a gym bag tucked under your desk…
Real mayoral race or a skit from SNL?!
Am I the only one that’s really not impressed by the candidates or have the people of Halifax given up completely that they no longer care?! Honestly, I have no idea how any of these people are getting elected. —Non-Voter
Smoking assholes
To all food servers: when you bring a menu or food order to my table and you FUCKING STINK of the last cigarette you smoked, thank you for ruining my dining experience before I even taste the fucking food. Restaurant owners PLEASE don’t let your servers smoke or at the very least have them wear…
To all bus riding dimwit fucks
Why, girls, do you put your bus pass/fare in a wallet, in a purse, in a handbag and then at the bottom of a backpack under your books and all your other shit? You stunned bitches! Did you not know you were taking the bus that day? And to all assholes, why not dig the…
Lack of COMMON SENSE!!
Who, What and Why the Fuck are there these concrete medians popping up in Parking Lots? Example: Cole Harbour Road and Forest Hills NSLC parking lot. Who the fuck is the brainwave engineer who designed the enter lanes. I mean COME ON!!! WTF! The last time I saw a vehical do a piroette to take…
Compost heap of vandalism
To the four 20 to 25-year-old “mindless little boys” who decided to finish off their Saturday night by tossing a large green compost bin through my windshield and covering my car with coffee grinds and orange peels—thanks. I speak on behalf of the nine other victims of your vandalism who have a little less spending…
No notes
Your fucking JOB requires you to enter notes into our CRM system. When I ask you a question about a client it’s because there are no fucking NOTES in their file. So don’t get all fucking pissy with ME because YOU can’t do the part of your job that requires you to fucking COMMUNICATE. —There…
Entitled generation
You are not automatically “senior” to people in the office just because you started two months before they did. You are not exempt for the “no scent” policy at the office just because you “like the smell” of your body spray. You don’t get a break before people who get in earlier than you do…
Mike Savage: The deal maker
Mike Savage arrives at Barrington’s overstuffed Starbucks with muddy shoes and hems. He’s been at a Lake Banook dragon boat race. As we walk to Cabin Coffee on Hollis he says he just judged the cutest costumed kid at the Alzheimer duck derby. He’s also hit the Westphal-Cole Harbour Fire Department’s 50th anniversary and several…
Fred Connors: The voice of passion
When friends told Fred Connors he should become mayor, he told them “they were absolutely crazy.” But dealing with impending legal action from the city when he insisted on keeping a flock of hens in the backyard of his Bloomfield Street home—something prohibited by Halifax’s land use bylaws—prompted him to imagine how he’d do things…
Tom Martin: The fighter
If you wanted the job back then, you had to fight for it. Police applicants in the ’70s were brought down to the department’s gymnasium and placed in a boxing ring with the largest opponent that could be found. The top brass would stand along the upper balcony, watching. “You went toe-to-toe,” says Tom Martin.…
Tempted by The Tempest Replica
If you only see one show from Live Art Dance’s stacked season, this is it. That’s sound advice coming directly from Paul Caskey, the executive producer behind Live Art, Atlantic Canada’s premier presenter of contemporary dance for 30 years and counting. “It’s the kind of show that’ll leave you stuck in your seat,” says Caskey…
Big Brother calling
If you’re the type that would happily sit down to a bowl of slop for Thanksgiving or who thinks hanging onto a oversized plastic key for 5 hours in artificial rain is no biggie, I know where you’re headed this Sunday. Big Brother Canada is casting for their inaugural season and I am basically hyperventilating,…
Telling stories with Blue Rocks & Halifax
Blues, purples and reds swirl into one another on John Hartman’s canvas. His watercolour scenes of the shore near Lunenburg are vibrant and full of life, but a tragic story inspired their creation. Hartman’s exhibit for Studio 21 is a collection of landscapes, many of which are recognizable Halifax scenes like the MacKay bridge and…
Trick or wheat
Fall is my favourite time of year for many reasons: the crisp, autumn air, the urge—without the necessity—to hibernate, pumpkin-flavoured everything and beer. As far as I’m concerned, the encroaching darkness of this spooky season should be reflected in your pint glass as well. You may well know that Halifax is blessed with a bevy…
Water world
We’re just getting our tour legs. Is that a thing? Maybe I mean sea legs, that’s more appropriate for a band named Hey Ocean!,” says vocalist and bassist Dave Vertesi, laughing. Currently touring across Canada, Vancouver’s sand-and-sun pop trio returns with same-city dark prog-rockers The Zolas, alongside Halifax’s The Lucy Grays, at Michael’s Bar and…
Holy rollers
Do you like it fast and loud? Feel as if the Halifax music scene has been missing something of late? Well pray no more because The Holy Snappers have arrived, and the newly formed rock and roll trio is looking to fill a hard-hitting niche amongst local bands. “I don’t think there’s a whole lot…
Birthday sociables for Alexander Keith
Let’s face it: our dear Alexander Keith is celebrated on a daily basis. Every time you knock back a pint it’s a nod to the man behind Halifax’s best-known brew. So if on any regular day you shout “Sociable!” and raise your glass, slurping back your beer with pride, on Mr. Keith’s birthday, his 217th…
Perpetual Detour arrives
Perpetual Detour wasn’t a band in the beginning—it was just four friends from softball, hanging out and jamming in the basement. No expectations, no pressure, just a little musical experimentation and recreational song writing. “The first couple of songs that AJ [Leblanc] and I wrote, it was really striking how it all fell together,” says…
Steve Mackie: The comedian
Standing on stage between fellow candidates Tom Martin and Aaron Eisses at the Our HRM Alliance Debate on September 19, Steve Mackie looks like a comfortable compromise. Flanked by Martin, all suited up, and Eisses, looking like he’s ready for a bike ride, Mackie is wearing casual beige. His opening statement is short and to-the-point:…
Free Will Astrology
Happy Birthday! LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23-OCTOBER 22) While doing research in South America four decades ago, anthropologist Claude Lévi-Strauss found an indigenous tribe whose people claimed they could see the planet Venus in the daytime. This seemed impossible to him. But he later consulted astronomers who told him that in fact Venus does emit enough light…
Robert (Wesley) McCormack: The enthusiast
Robert McCormack did his homework for the Our HRM Alliance Debate on September 19. Before the debate, he was reading up on their policies to make sure he was well-versed on the issues plaguing HRM. Fast-forward to the debate: McCormack made a few solid points throughout the night, but his frequent “umm”s and “uhh”s detracted…
Aaron Eisses: The techno farmer
Aaron Eisses looks out of place in the posh lobby of the Lord Nelson in flip-flops. While other candidates tighten their ties and prepare for the debate schmoozing under chandelier-clad ceilings, Eisses takes off his rain pants, and reveals an aloe plant-coloured green t-shirt and pulls a wrinkled hoodie out of a knapsack. “I grew…
The lightning round
Last week, I appeared at a “Savage Love Live” event at Radford University in Virginia. Questions are submitted on index cards at SLL events, which allows questioners to remain anonymous and forces them to be succinct. The crowd at Radford was large and inquisitive. The students submitted more questions than I could possibly hope to…
20 Questions for candidates from The Coast
Meet the human behind the politician: We sent the candidates a questionnaire, asking questions that are more personal than political. Here are the questions: 8 PERSONAL LIFE questions What are your hobbies? In high school, which Breakfast Club character did you most resemble? What continents have you visited in your life? Where have you travelled…
Art collector
Collectors understand how all-encompassing their habit can get. It starts off innocently enough, but soon records, clothes or crystal unicorns become something to pine over. Themes of collection and repetition run throughout Eleanor King’s Sobey Art Award exhibition, opening October 24 at the Museum of Contemporary Canadian Art in Toronto. King represents the Atlantic region…
Agricola Street becoming resto hub
Ludovic Eveno, who has worked as a chef in France and locally at Bish and its reincarnation, The Bicycle Thief (Bishop’s Landing, 425-7993), has purchased the building at 2540 Agricola Street, just across from the liquor store at the corner of Charles Street. He intends to open a restaurant in the space next spring, taking…
Bleak Blowers
A couple of weeks back, Cadence Macmichael closed her Pretty Things Boutique, citing frustration with city policies around street construction and other issues. The incident raises the question: Is Blowers Street the next Barrington Street? Remember the hue and cry when Barrington Street storefronts were papered over, how it was all the fault of city…
HMV kaput?
Last week, Frank magazine reported that Halifax’s HMV location (5523 Spring Garden Road, 425-1082) is closing. Such a closure wouldn’t be unexpected: When’s the last time you bought a new recording at a brick-and-mortar store? It’s 20-frickin’-12, for dog’s sake. No one buys CDs or DVDs anymore in the age of the interwebs. But staff…
School kids need instruments
Today choral conductor Christina Murray circulated a message that has all the heart-warming goodness of Here Comes the Boom, but without all the bodyslamming. Get in touch if you can help. “Dear Music-making friends, Rockingstone Heights School, in the Spryfield area of Halifax, has a dedicated music teacher trying to make a program work where…
