Friends come together for Dan Falvey
Update, Thursday, June 28: Dan died peacefully last night. Dan Falvey has been a part of the Halifax bar scene for 32 years, working as a server and bartender at seemingly everywhere: “Jenny’s, Your Father’s Moustache, Split Crow, Peddler’s Pub, Lower Deck, The Seahorse,” he rattles off over the phone. “Probably some I’ve missed.” I’ve…
Dirty
Aw, co-worker, I don’t know how to say this—we don’t avoid you because we dislike you, but you are kind of gross. You can be heard eating from the next room, and you eat everything with your hands (tuna?! chicken salad?! Arrgh your hands are covered in saliva!), and your hygiene is atrocious. I feel…
Can’t use a debit machine
To the woman at the grocery store who couldn’t fucking read and follow the instructions on how to use the Interac machine and gave the fast lane cashier such a hard time, fuck you. You swore at her, and then ripped the receipt out of her hands as if she was playing some cruel joke…
Scattered around the room
Just a simple hello and thanks for building the nursery. Now if I can just call an elevator car. —The Roast Beef Velvet
Pretty scab
Do yourself a favour and keep your hands free of ink. Ghandi knew karma was the bullshit excuse of the upper casts. —Don’t You?
Keep it in your pants
To the guy at the gym who seems to think that oozing pools of sweat onto the floor beneath his stationary bike from within the slimy confines of his rubber workout suit and hoody is a mark of achievement to be shared with fellow gym-goers, think again. It’s just plain wrong. It’s off-putting and unhygienic…
Takes one to know one
This is a big F-you to the woman in the Young Street grocery store that had the nerve to make rude noises at me and then get in the same line up just so she could call me a tramp and be rude. I had on a dress with a collar that was knee length…
Don’t shit next to me
I walk into an empty public bathroom and enter one of the many available stalls. You walk in after me, and which stall do you choose? Of course, the one right next to me! Why? There are many empty stalls to choose from. Why would you decide to pick the only stall that has someone…
Damn vandals
Yes, I understand my lilac tree is beautiful, I like it too! I also understand it is next to the road, but it is planted in my yard, and consequently my property. So when I go outside to admire my beautiful flowering tree, it really pisses me off to see a bunch of jerks have…
Good question
I just looked at a rental on Quinpool Road. This was a one bedroom for $975! Not only did it have a horrible bathroom, but a horrible kitchen with the only counter being about 5 feet which included a sink. It had no cupboard space and was pretty small for a one bedroom. It did…
It’s about time!
Those are some great changes to EI. I just can’t believe that it took so long. I have been upset for years about the injustices of the EI system. On that note, anyone that thinks these changes are bad, well I can understand why you think this. If I had a job that I could…
Behind the scenes of city hall’s Occupy NS eviction
I spent four hours Monday reviewing thousands of pages of documents related to the city’s eviction of the Occupy group from Victoria Park and Grand Parade last Remembrance Day. The documents were obtained through a Freedom of Information request filed by the Labour Council, which in turn allowed me some time with them. The smaller…
James Arness, wherefore art thou?
We seem to be experiencing a rash of gun crime, some but not all drug related. The great metropolis is seeking a new police chief, maybe it’s time to get a person with some experience when it comes to dealing with gunslingers and other assorted filth, and not a desk jockey, good at administration and…
Dear bicycle thief
You stole my new bicycle which was locked. You must think that you are entitled to just take other people’s property. It was a new bicycle and I relied on it for exercise and to get around. Because of you I will have to buy another bike. People who steal are eventually dealt with by…
You’re not welcome anymore
I’m a cautious girl, I know how to take care of myself. You snuck up on me. Uninvited you took advantage of my hospitality and leeched my strength and warmth. Then you took all you could and left me on a bus out of town with a box of tissues for company. I don’t know…
The ordering process
I really REALLY wish people would learn how to order. If you are ordering a pack of cigarettes you have to tell the person behind the counter more than just the brand name. Example: If you’re ordering John Player’s they need to know if you want blue or silver, king or regular, 20 or 25.…
Good ears and a big heart
You are the bright young thing who works at a store on Grafton Street. I was shopping there on Wednesday with my best friend, the last day of a two week visit before I return to the drudge and homesickness of my life in the UK. The sun was shining and BF and I were…
Hail to the bus driver!
So yesterday I was on the #1 bus, sometime shortly after 4pm. Around Dalhousie University, a young “lady” got on, having a loud cellphone conversation. Now, I’m not one of those who bemoans the downfall of civilization whenever somebody uses a phone on the bus, nor do I clutch my pearls when somebody says “Oh…
Bad karma
Had I actually jumped in front of you, I would submit to your “karma curse.” I didn’t steal your place, moron…I went to a completely different line….customer service. —Wake Up
HUGs
Congratulations on the completion of phase one of the Privileged Enclave Protective Buffer! No McMansions, condos or affordable housing shoe-horning in to your idyllic little piece of the peninsula! No sir! I particularly want to compliment you on your use of the word “rustic” to describe the riff raff barrier. It must help divert attention…
Library etiquette
Remember when libraries were quiet places, very similar to churches? I sure do. This is no longer the case at two of Halifax’s libraries, and, as a friend of mine has informed me, no longer the case at a certain Dartmouth library. What do you get now? Clowns carrying on as though they were at…
Dear Government of Canada
Thanks for the new EI changes. The next time I get laid off, I am expected to work for 80% of minimum wage. And, considering that not even fast food pays such a low wage, I guess I will have to sit on pogey until apple picking season…oh wait, farmers need workers that care about…
Caress me down
Summer is going to be so fun this year, can’t wait to get back to nature with my partner in crime. The woods are calling, let’s answer it. —Itchy
There is a whole other side to bad roommates
What about the asshole roommates who flip out when your shoes are neatly placed with the toe facing opposite to theirs. What about the asshole roommates who insist that the ENTIRE (walls and all) bathroom be scrubed 3 times a week when you’ve already vacuumed the whole place the day before. What about the asshole…
Be men
I hate to subscribe to a some-what outdated idea of masculinity, but when it comes to romance, this city is the shits. Some of the men I’ve tangled with in the last 2 years have been selfish, uncourteous dickheads who have no idea how to treat a woman. Sure, it was ‘my fault’ for sleeping…
Music & Image makes video magic happen
Since The Beatles first popularized music videos in the ‘60s, producing video to accompany a single track has grown into more and more of a necessity for musicians and filmmakers alike. Although videos were once created for television, we are now smack dab in a time where a music video’s popularity is based on YouTube…
Armageddon for the idle
My hero, Big Steve, who now has that long sought after majority, has unleashed his powers on the scroungers, loafers, idle bastards and shiftless who consider pogey a way of life. We need to crack down on the parasites and leeches who are taking money out of my pocket so they can do SFA and…
Council to discuss missing concert money
Trade Centre Limited presented the city of Halifax with a bill for $359,550 related to concerts on the Halifax Common on September 30, 2010—that was 20 months ago—but still the issue hasn’t been resolved. Some of that delay related to former acting CAO Wayne Anstey and mayor Peter Kelly keeping the bill secret from anyone…
Let us go home
To those people out there who like to sit around the bar long after the staff have turned on the lights and turned off the music. DON’T! Be considerate, all the sorrys and thankyous while you finally head out the door doesn’t make up for it. Leave when it’s obvious. Just because you purchased the…
Big red shoes
I’m loving every second of sunshine with you. —’Lil Red Shoes
Bananas
Has anyone watched Bananas! A film DOLE doesn’t want you to see? It is available on Netflix. Did the workers get any financial compensation? Any protective gear? Any work clothing? Is it legal for a US company to have the workers work without boots, without gloves, without masks—without any protective gear? Is it legal for…
Bottle return
Thanks to the nice guys at the south end bottle return. I showed up with my bottles and because I was with my new baby, a guy who was ahead of me in line alerted the staff who pulled me out of the line, carried the bottles for me and helped by pushing my stroller…
Moped
Hey asshole, get your fuckin moped off the sidewalk and bike lane on the bridge. —Recumbent
Love is letting go
The happiest time of my life was with you, doing our dorky things like dancing in the kitchen, having bonfires, rafting down a river, running around naked in a creek like children, your grilled cheese sandwiches, your blonde eyelashes, your body, oh so built. I have decided to think of these beautiful things when I…
Sick of pit bulls
I’m at the dog park, and my little dog was having a great time chasing his ball. Then your pit bull attacks him—just like that. Thank god I yelled enough and he let my dog go. But then the dog jumped up on a woman holding a baby, and the father of the child tore…
Forbidden love in the middle of the ocean
I met you a couple weeks ago, and I came to find that you were my boss. I felt an immediate attraction to you, and now I lay in bed every night tossing and turning, thinking about the ten year age difference and if there was really any significant meaning to the interactions that we…
Avengers
I’m a huge movie buff, which has caused me to be extremely critical of movies (especially some of the crap they produce these days). But never have I finished watching a film and wanted to stand up and applaud. I wanted so badly to start a slow-motion clap, one that would do justice to the…
Do your job
Me and some friends were at a popular downtown club. Two bouncers decided to rough up my 130 pound friend for wearing a hood. This bitch is not really directed towards the bouncers, their behaviour is to be expected seeing as they are dickless little cowards who think they’re tough because they can toss around…
Frankly Sinatra
You made good arguments, you’re funny and you’re also a viking (mostly according to me). THEN you go and sing my favourite bloody song—really well, I might add—at karaoke. I like you. And I hope I get to see you soon. —Mass Nerder
Remove your heads from your asses
Here goes, to the idiots who sit on Joseph Howe Drive in rush hour traffic for a full 15 mins, inching your way to the intersection of Joseph Howe Drive and the 102, and when you get there, you sit at the red light, then go straight through holding up everyone turning right on that…
Tail light
I was in a store the other day to buy a tail light and you, a fellow customer, pointed me toward the bicycle tail light you like. Thanks. That light is half the price of the one I wanted and is super bright. —Guy in the Rain Coat
Whiny little fuckers
To all you people bitching about there being no jobs in Nova Scotia. You are the whiniest assholes I have ever met. You can’t get a decent job here after you graduate, so that’s Halifax’s fault? I don’t think so. It’s your shitty attitude that is the reason why you’re still working at Tim’s with…
To my wife, the brick
Why are you always tired and with a headache? And, what kind of excuse is that, btw? You just lay there and let me do all the work. —Brick Layer
Dartmouth refinery to close
Premier Darrell Dexter announced last week that Imperial Oil will close its Dartmouth refinery next year, putting 200 people out of work. Besides the immediate impacts on workers and their families, it’s too early to say what will result from the closure. Imperial vaguely speaks of a sale, but the economics of refineries evidently don’t…
Yellow light district
Drivers of Halifax stop trying to drive through yellow lights at intersections at busy times of day! Twice in one day I had to walk around cars that got stuck in the middle of the intersection because they were in a hurry to make the light. If there is no room for you don’t go!…
Barrington Street bike path now open
Barrington Street has recently become a little more cycle-friendly with a new bicycle path, running from North Street to Cornwallis Street, that’s ready to be used by cyclists and pedestrians alike. The path, which was originally unpaved and worn down from use, begins at the bottom of North Street and runs along the east side…
Green cuisine
If the restaurants in my city are to be believed, the cuisine of every other country in the world is based around giant hunks of green pepper. —Big Neba
Hot Water
From locals Tongan Death Grip and Vixens, to bands from PEI, Winnipeg, New Brunswick and Ontario, 25 diverse punk acts play the all-ages Harbour Water Fest in Halifax this weekend. Eekum Seekum’s guitarist and main manager of diyhalifax.ca, Ryley Beggs, started the annual event three years ago to provide a space for people outside of…
DJ IV’s so vein
Halifax’s party-rocker, DJ IV, feels best when tucked away in his quiet Oxford Street studio. His modest recording booth, huge computer screen and equipment crowd the modernized attic. This is his comfort zone, his workshop, his easel, and every day spent here over his 13-year career has been preparation for one big night—Saturday at the…
Amazing racers
Spandex. It’s hard to take seriously. Like visitors from some utopian future, the cyclists who wear these plastic outfits seem out of place, disconnected from the real world. With aerodynamic helmets, futuristic sunglasses and protein-filled food in bar form, they seem ready to be shot into space, to leave this mixed-up planet behind. It’s easy…
Bicycle buffs
The World Naked Bike Ride will be baring it all along the streets of Halifax for its fifth year on June 9. Tom MacDonald has been organizing the event for the last four years. He sees it as a way for cyclists to empower themselves by being a bold positive presence on the road. “I…
Happy trailers
All across the city bikers are getting down to business and businesses are getting on to bikes. “People need to know that biking is a real option for them personally and professionally,” Moira Peters says. She is about to launch her business, Unwined: Tasting Parties by Moira, this summer and she will be carrying all…
Trapped in the Sea
A portrait of a woman trapped—by her feelings, her choices and her times—The Deep Blue Sea is by turns claustrophobic, overly mannered and moving, overcoming its shortcomings with a typically powerful performance from Rachel Weisz. The wife of a judge (Simon Russell Beale) in post-war London, her Hester Collyer walks away from a passionless marriage,…
Easy as BMX
Sick of the standard bicycle commute and looking to spice it up with some bunny hops and nose wheelies? There are a few things to consider when purchasing a BMX bike for the first time. Complete beginner bikes generally range from $400 to $600. For starters, look for a bike frame that is made of…
Gossamer thin Chernobyl
Young tourists explore the abandoned town of Prypiat, and discover that something has survived the radiation. A one-line premise stretched to gossamer thinness in Chernobyl Diaries. This shaky horror film, written and produced by Paranormal Activity auteur Oren Peli, finds several adventurous twentysomethings taking an “extreme tour” of the areas ravaged by the 1986 Chernobyl…
Free Will Astrology
Happy Birthday! Gemini (May 21-June 20) Your core meditation this week is Oscar Wilde’s belief that disobedience is a primal virtue. Be ingeniously, pragmatically and cheerfully disobedient! Harness your disobedience so that it generates outbreaks of creative transformation that improve your life. For inspiration, read this passage by Robert Anton Wilson: “Every fact of science…
Men In Black III solid summer fare
A decade after the second installment of Men in Black and fifteen years after the original, it’s fair to say MIB III is a money grab—a chance to cash in on characters we already know long after we’ve stopped thinking about them. But for mindless entertainment, that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Agents J (Will…
The power of opting-in
Q I’m a 17-year-old girl and, in most aspects, I’m confident with myself, my identity and my body. Earlier this year, I met a girl. She had some serious drama at home and needed to get out of her house, so I let her stay at mine. Things went a LOT further than I was…
Citizen Gangster: Character-rich, context-poor
 Leave it to us Canadians to make a movie about a badass bank robber, Edwin Boyd (Scott Speedman) and downplay his historical celebrity status. Boyd, a WWII vet dissatisfied with his humble Toronto life tries to get an acting gig, but settles for becoming a criminal (he wears face paint, so that’s kind of…
Tweed Run and Picnic brings style to Bike Week
This Sunday afternoon fashion meets passion for cycling. Intrigued? Getting involved is easy. Step one: dig out your best coat, newsboy cap, tweed trousers and suspenders. If your closet isn’t looking as 1900s as you wish it did, grab your Sunday best—those clothes that make you feel good, maybe even those pumps you’ve never biked…
National treasures
It was more than four years ago when Denise Markonish, a curator at North Adams, Massachusetts’ gallery MASS MoCA, began to notice a funny thing. She kept finding that the artists who were piquing her interest turned out to be “secret Canadians”: artists whose work she found in various contexts and was intrigued by, who…
Jenny Berkel’s haunting folk
Although she grew up in a family of musicians and had taken piano lessons when she was young, Ontario-born folk artist Jenny Berkel grew up expecting to become a writer. She wrote stories and poems on the family’s clunky desktop. It wasn’t until she moved to Winnipeg to try journalism that she realized it wasn’t…
Scotia Festival of Music expands the chamber
Many people get the false impression that chamber music is for the rich, old or stuffy. While it’s true that chamber music tends to attract an elitist population, there’s something for everyone to be found in this genre which, contradictory to popular belief, is quite alive. At the Scotia Festival of Music, you can listen…
Start wining
The Atlantic wine scene is growing healthily, as you’ll see when the Atlantic Canada Wine Symposium comes to town. The theme is “rising tide,” as in “a rising tide raises all boats,” which may seem cliche, given the region and city we’re talking about, but there’s more to this than the obvious Maritime link. While…
Exploring Terrain Dance
Uniformly chaotic and elegantly deconstructed—these oxymorons piece together the concepts inspiring Rebecca Lazier’s out-of-the-box choreography style. Originally from Halifax, Lazier is the choreographer and artistic director for Terrain Dance Company in New York City, and they’re performing two of their pieces at the Scotia Festival of Music. “Artistically, the chance to collaborate with Scotia Fest…
Chevy to the Levy
Eugene Levy looks uncomfortable. Which is fine—this is what he does. He’s a pro at looking slightly awkward and getting laughs. Even when in a dapper black suit, his Order of Canada pin on the lapel, shaking hands and posing for photos. Even on a day he’s flown into town to receive an honourary Doctorate…
The Fabric of Clay stitches together an artists’ life
When Alexandra McCurdy makes art, only a handful of every 20 attempts turn out properly. This isn’t because she is careless, or because she strives for absolute perfection. McCurdy struggles with making usable pieces because she—and only she, because her style of medium is truly unique—goes through the strenuous process of layering and weaving porcelain…
Singing in the stall
In 2000, experimental vocalist and composer DB Boyko was living in Vancouver when she was asked to become the musical director of the Songbird project, a campaign about the ecological impact urban centres have on the life of songbirds. While working on what would become the Songbird Oratorio, the director suggested she partner up with…
Bake all day?
To the local coffee chain, why do you keep using the word baking in your advertising, we all know it is frozen pre-made food shipped in from Ontario. It fits the definition of baking but just barely, I would call that deceptive advertising. —HT
Double standard
Wow, I’m a female and dating someone quite a bit younger than me. Such cause for shock and awe! Such cause for criticism! If this was the other way around and I was a man dating a woman ten years my junior no one would say anything about it, so shut up and mind your…
What Doug Brown does for you
After working 12 years delivering The Coast, Doug Brown has become Halifamous as one of the longest serving—and most public—of the paper’s public representatives. If you’ve been picking up the paper over those dozen years, there’s a good chance Brown himself touched your copy. Or at least the bundle of 50 papers that yours came…
Inkwell has a birthday
“I never knew so many beautiful things could exist in one place without causing the world to implode in a series of rainbows and unicorns.” That’s how one voter described Inkwell Modern Handmade Boutique & Letterpress Studio (1658 Market Street, 405-8309) for The Coast’s Best of Halifax contest last year. With that sort of enthusiastic support,…
Deans Flowers opens garden centre
“This flower shop opened in 1919,” explains Holly Winchester, owner of Deans Flowers (6025 Stanley Street, 454-0900). “Back then of course they weren’t flying in flowers, so they grew everything on site. We’ve got 4,000 square feet here, where the typical flower shop is about the size of a master bedroom. We were looking for…
SunME Swimsuit Spa expands to Halifax
SunME Swimsuit Spa has been operating in Bedford (1600 Bedford Highway, Suite 102, 404-7007) for just less than a year, but the operation is already expanding—to Historic Properties downtown (407-8808). “It’s a complete duplication,” says owner Chrystal Saulnier, but we think of it as more of an express location.” By that, she means she’s added…
InFullBloom Community Festival
Summer’s not the only time for plants to grow. The Bloomfield Centre is about to literally blossom with life on June 3 as it’s the second annual InFullBloom Community Festival, from 1-5pm. “As a community non-profit organization, we saw bare space. [We wondered] how do we make Bloomfield come alive? How do we bring the…
