Just as February means three-foot snowbanks and a Tim Houston scrum leads to unfortunate soundbites, Valentine’s Week in Halifax can only mean one thing: The Coast’s annual Sex + Dating Survey results are here—and as usual, the responses more than deliver.
Hundreds of you took the time to spill your saucy (and 100% anonymous) secrets on dating disasters and bedroom fantasies. More than half of respondents this year were women, and just under a quarter were between the ages of 25 and 35. More than one in four say they’ve had group sex, and one in six say they’ve had sex outdoors in Halifax in the past year. (About a quarter of respondents wished they had.)
We’ve assembled a raunchy round-up of our favourite survey replies below, from one-night stands to first-date faux pas to Haligonian hotties and everything in between. Follow the links below to jump right into the fun:
Who are you?
Have you ever…
Let’s talk about hotties…
Let’s talk about hook-ups…
Let’s talk about dating…
Let’s talk about sex…
Still looking for more? Good! We’re just getting started—we’ll be dishing out more survey results all week long.
*Disclaimer: This story contains graphic language*
Who are you?
My gender identity is…
Woman - 52.9%
Man - 42.2%
Nonbinary - 6.4%
Transgender - 1.2%
None of the above - 0.3%
My sexual orientation is…
Straight/heteroxexual - 66.5%
Bi - 16.5%
Queer - 8.2%
Asexual - 5.8%
Gay/lesbian - 5.5%
I don’t like labels - 5.2%
Not sure right now/questioning - 4.3%
Pansexual - 4.3%
Other - 0.3%
My relationship status is…
Married - 27.8%
Common-law - 15.6%
Dating - 12.8%
Single-and-looking - 11.3%
Single-and-not-looking - 9.2%
Divorced - 7%
Separated - 4.6%
Complicated - 3.4%
Open relationship - 2.4%
Polyamorous/in a polycule - 2.1%
Open marriage - 1.8%
Serial monogamist - 1.8%
In my relationship(s) I am…
Happy - 51.7%
N/A - 30.2%
Lost - 6.5%
Restless and looking - 6.2%
Keen to end it - 2.5%
In love with someone else - 1.8%
Cheating - 1.2%
My age is…
25-35 - 23.2%
46-55 - 19.6%
56-65 - 19.6%
36-45 - 17.1%
66 and over - 16.8%
18-24 - 3.7%
I first became sexually active…
Under 18 - 44.7%
18-24 - 41.9%
25-35 - 1.5%
Not yet - 0.9%
I am a…
Switch - 64.5%
Top - 18.9%
Bottom - 16.6%
The number of partners I’ve been with is…
1-10 - 39.5%
11-30 - 29.3%
31-50 - 13%
Who can remember? - 10.2%
51-100 - 6.8%
0 - 1.2%
I live in…
Dartmouth - 16.9%
Out of town - 13.8%
North end - 12.6%
Quinpool/west end - 9.5%
Bedford - 8.6%
Clayton Park/Fairview - 6.4%
Downtown/Barrington/waterfront - 5.8%
Hammonds Plains/Timberlea/Tantallon - 5.8%
Sackville - 5.8%
South end - 5.2%
Spryfield/Herring Cove/Prospect - 4%
Cole Harbour - 3.4%
Eastern Shore - 2.1%
In the work world I am…
Employed full time - 55.2%
Retired - 21.3%
A contract worker/freelancer - 9.5%
Employed part time - 5.8%
A student - 4.6%
Unemployed - 3.7%
Politically I swing…
NDP - 34.4%
Liberal - 27.5%
A brick - 16.2%
Progressive Conservative - 10%
Green - 6.2%
With Jesus - 2.8%
Conservative Party - 2.5%
PPC - 0.3%
Have you ever…
Been on a blind date?
Yes - 37.8%
No - 62.2%
Been in a long-term relationship?
Yes - 96.9%
No - 3.1%
Been in love?
Yes - 95.1%
No - 4.9%
Cheated?
Yes - 54.9%
No - 45.1%
Been cheated on?
Yes - 65%
No - 35%
Bailed on an engagement?
Yes - 13.9%
No - 86.1%
Hooked up with a friend’s ex?
Yes - 36.3%
No - 63.7%
Dated a friend’s ex?
Yes - 24.6%
No - 75.4%
Been caught in the act?
Yes - 39.4%
No - 60.6%
Been someone else’s sneaky link?
Yes - 40.6%
No - 59.4%
Had a one-night stand?
Yes - 79.7%
No - 20.3%
Had sex on a first date?
Yes - 69.8% (nice)
No - 30.2%
Had a pregnancy scare?
Yes - 56.3%
No - 43.7%
Had an STI scare?
Yes - 43.6%
No - 56.4%
Had an STI?
Yes - 28.6%
No - 71.4%
Ghosted a date?
Yes - 21.7%
No - 78.3%
Been ghosted by a date?
Yes - 38.8%
No - 61.2%
Hit on someone at work?
Yes - 59.3%
No - 40.7%
Hooked up with someone from work?
Yes - 54%
No - 46%
Dated someone from work?
Yes - 39.3%
No - 60.7%
Received oral sex?
Yes - 96.6%
No - 3.4%
Performed oral sex?
Yes - 96.6%
No - 3.4%
Received anal sex?
Yes - 42.4%
No - 57.6%
Performed anal sex?
Yes - 38.7%
No - 61.3%
Eaten ass?
Yes - 35.4%
No - 64.6%
Had your ass eaten?
Yes - 40.2%
No - 59.8%
Pegged?
Yes - 8.3%
No - 91.7%
Been pegged?
Yes - 7.7%
No - 92.3%
Used toys in the bedroom?
Yes - 79.9%
No - 20.1%
Had group sex?
Yes - 28.4%
No - 71.6%
Paid for sex?
Yes - 12.2%
No - 87.8%
Been paid for sex?
Yes - 4.3%
No - 95.7%
Let’s talk about hotties…
Where are Nova Scotia’s most attractive people?
Halifax - 64.3%
I don’t know where, but it sure ain’t here - 19.5%
Annapolis Valley - 5.2%
South Shore - 4.2%
Cape Breton - 3.6%
Eastern Shore - 1.9%
Pictou - 0.6%
Truro - 0.6%
(We had Antigonish as an option, too, but nobody voted for it.)
Who are the hottest Haligonians?
Other - 20.7%
Farmer’s market regulars - 12.9%
Musicians - 9.4%
Doctors, nurses and med students - 8.1%
Dartmouthians - 6.5%
North end hipsters - 5.8%
Restaurant workers - 5.8%
Surfers - 3.9%
Downtown lawyers - 3.6%
Librarians - 3.2%
Navy sailors - 3.2%
Bedford suburbans - 2.9%
Hal-Con nerds - 2.9%
Salty sea dogs - 2.6%
Lobster fishers - 2.3%
Eco-friendly vegans - 1.9%
NSCAD artists - 1.6%
Jocks - 1.3%
SackVegas, baby - 1.3%
What’s the first thing you’re attracted to?
Personality - 34.5%
Looks - 27.7%
Sense of humour - 16.3%
Body - 11.1%
Other - 4.9%
Age - 2.5%
Availability - 2.2%
Wealth - 0.6%
Job - 0.3%
How much does a partner’s height matter to you?
Not at all - 47.9%
I prefer to be the shorter one - 32.3%
I prefer to be the taller one - 12.5%
If one of us needs a stool, it ain’t working - 7.3%
How much does a partner’s weight matter to you?
It matters a little - 48.2%
As long as they’re happy - 24.2%
Not at all - 15.3%
It matters a lot - 12.3%
Let’s talk about hook-ups…
What’s your favourite way to meet potential lovers?
I won’t limit myself to a single method - 47.5%
Through my friends - 18.7%
Online - 13.8%
Through my hobbies/interests - 7.4%
At work/school - 5.5%
At clubs or bars - 5.2%
Other - 1.8%
What’s the best place in Halifax to hook up?
“Casino”
“Gay bars”
“Home”
“Stillwell outside”
“No idea”
“Outside the Local”
“NSCC waterfront campus”
“Durty Nelly’s”
“Emera Oval”
“The bathrooms at A Mano”
“Nighttime in construction sites”
“Point Pleasant Park”
Let’s talk about dating…
It’s best to ask someone out…
In person - 57.1%
By text - 23.6%
Calling on the phone - 15.5%
With a DM - 3.7%
How much older a person would you ask out?
Up to five years older - 29.3%
Age ain’t nothing but a number, baby - 24.4%
Up to 10 years older - 23.8%
Around my age - 13.9%
Don’t ask, don’t tell - 4.3%
Has to be younger than me - 4.3%
How much younger a person would you ask out?
Up to 10 years younger - 26.5%
Up to five years younger - 23.8%
Around my age - 21.9%
If Leonardo DiCaprio can do it, so can I - 13%
I respect the half-your-age-plus-seven rule - 11.7%
Has to be older than me - 3.1%
When dating someone new, how long before you go for a kiss?
I decide on a case-by-case basis - 37.7%
First date - 31.6%
Second date - 17.5%
I let the other person make the first move - 7.7%
Third date - 4.3%
Fourth date or later - 1.2%
How soon do you have sex in a new relationship?
Depends on the person and how we both feel - 68.9%
First date - 8.9%
Fourth date or later - 8%
Second date - 6.8%
Third date - 6.2%
Not until marriage - 1.2%
What’s your tragic dating flaw?
Other - 25.7%
I’m a self-sabotager - 21.6%
I’m too attached - 21.6%
I’m too unattached - 12.7%
I’m attracted to hot messes - 11.4%
I’m a hot mess - 7%
Where do you most like to go on a first date?
To a cafe - 27.4%
For a meal at a restaurant - 19.4%
To a cocktail bar/brewery - 19.1%
For a walk - 18.2%
Somewhere we can be active together - 8.3%
Other - 2.5%
Home for dinner - 2.2%
Sightseeing - 1.5%
To a movie - 1.2%
To a sports game - 0.3%
Who pays on the first date?
Split the bill - 39.9%
I always do - 30.1%
Whoever asked - 22.4%
I never do - 7.7%
What can your date do to impress you most?
Make me laugh - 43.6%
Be curious about me - 36.3%
Other - 7%
Dress up - 4.9%
Smell good - 2.7%
Have sex with me - 2.4%
Flatter me - 1.5%
Pay for everything - 1.5%
What is the best topic to discuss on a first date?
Other - 23.8%
Music - 19.8%
Current events - 18.8%
Professional life - 16.7%
Movies - 9%
Dating history - 3.7%
Sex - 3.1%
Politics - 1.9%
TV - 1.5%
Sports - 1.2%
Religion - 0.3%
Videos - 0.3%
What’s the most common mistake made on dates?
Talking about oneself too much - 32.7%
Talking about exes - 22.8%
Being inconsiderate - 16.4%
Being rude to waitstaff - 15.7%
Being too forward - 4%
Being miserly - 3.4%
Dressing poorly - 3.1%
Other - 1.5%
Bringing a present - 0.3%
What’s the biggest dealbreaker for getting into a relationship?
Intelligence or lack thereof - 24.9%
Body odour - 23.1%
No common interests - 22.5%
Political differences - 10.5%
Bad sex - 6.5%
Cultural/religious divides - 5.5%
Bad kissing - 3.1%
Eating habits - 1.8%
Other - 1.8%
Educational divides - 0.3%
How many people have you dated at one time?
One only - 39.4%
Two - 35.1%
Three - 16.9%
I don’t keep track, it’s all kind of fluid - 5.2%
Four or more - 3.4%
At what point do you get exclusive with the person?
I take that one case-by-case - 72.1%
After we have sex - 11.7%
I don’t get exclusive - 5.8%
After three dates - 5.2%
After one date - 3.4%
After two dates - 1.8%
How long do you need to date someone before you know you’re in love?
For our more dates, you need to get to know the other person - 85.5%
Three dates - 5.2%
One date, it’s gotta be instant - 4.9%
Two dates - 4.3%
How long do you need to date someone before you know it’s not going to work out?
One date, I can tell right away - 41.6%
Two dates - 26.1%
Four or more dates, sometimes it takes a while to figure out - 23.6%
Three dates - 8.7%
What’s the most important part of a relationship?
Trust - 51.4%
Intimacy - 14.1%
Commitment - 13.5%
Compromise - 8.9%
Other - 6.4%
Passion - 5.5%
Money - 0.3%
Let’s talk about sex…
How often do you have sex?
I don’t really have much sex - 37.1%
A couple times a week - 29.9%
Maybe a few times a month - 28.9%
Every day - 4.1%
How often do you wish you had sex?
A couple times a week - 48.8%
Every day - 25.6%
Maybe a few times a month - 18.8%
I don’t really want much sex - 6.8%
How satisfying is your current sex life?
I’m not having sex at the moment - 30%
Pretty hot, but there’s room for improvement - 26%
Needs some spice - 16.1%
The best ever - 12.4%
About average - 8.7%
Totally unsatisfying - 6.8%
Historically my best sex has been with…
My longtime partner/lover - 48.4%
My fuck-buddy/friends with benefits - 22.7%
My ex - 13%
Someone I met that night - 7.5%
Other - 7.1%
A professional - 1.2%
Lights on or off?
On - 54.3%
Off - 45.7%
In the last year, have you had sex outdoors in Halifax?
No - 59.9%
I wish - 22.5%
Yes - 16.4%
I wouldn’t - 1.2%
Where’s the best place to have sex outdoors in Halifax?
“Not going to reveal best spots. Best kept quiet, shared only among like-minded”
“Out on the harbour in a boat”
“Long Lake”
“Point Pleasant Park”
“Still looking for an opportunity to try it”
“It’s effin cold, ticks, damp”
“Duncan’s Cove”
“In the field at night off the Chain of Lakes Trail”
“Seaview Park”
“NSCC Waterfront”
“Citadel Hill”
“Public Gardens”
“Africville Park”
“Russell Lake”
Where’s the worst place to have sex outdoors in Halifax?
“Anywhere with sand”
“Bus transit shelter”
“Barrington Street”
“Scotia Square parkade”
“In front of The Dome”
“Anywhere that’s not your own yard”
How kinky are most Haligonians?
They experiment a bit - 38.6%
They keep their kinks to themselves - 22.5%
They experiment a lot - 13.7%
They need to act on their kinks more - 12.6%
Not at all - 9.5%
This city is legend - 3.2%
How kinky are you?
I experiment a bit - 42.2%
Not at all - 21.9%
I need to act on my kinks more - 19.7%
I experiment a lot - 7.8%
I don’t act on my kinks - 5%
Kinky as the Chebucto-Windsor intersection - 3.4%
How many times do you masturbate in a typical week?
Once - 23.2%
I don’t - 21.4%
Twice - 18%
Three times - 13%
Four times - 7.1%
Five times - 6.2%
Seven times - 5%
My hands are too busy to count that high - 4.3%
Six times - 1.9%
How do you feel about dirty talk?
I’m into it - 44.6%
I’m open to it, depending on the mood - 31.3%
I never know what to say - 14.9%
I’m not into it - 9.3%
What inaccurate thing about sex did you believe was true for too long?
“That your first time is supposed to hurt, and that bleeding afterwards is normal.”
“Pulling out to avoid pregnancy”
“That everyone wanted it all day long”
“That men’s desires were more important than my own”
“That most women liked me ejaculating on their face”
“Women don’t have orgasms”
“That I had a problem because it took me a while to cum. Turns out, partner needs to be more attentive and patient”
“That HIV was a given without a condom”
“That you should wait until marriage”
“That a man can’t Gucci more than once without resting”
“That men had lots of hair on their balls”
“That I was impure for it :) the Catholic church is the gift that gives for generations, baby”
“That I didn’t like oral sex because I’d only had partners who were bad at it”
“That sex stopped when you were 60 (I’m almost 66 and still love it!)”
“Women care about the look of your genitals (there are limits, I’m sure, but generally, I think they’re indifferent)”
“That it’s not smelly and it’s always pleasurable”
“That women only orgasm from intercourse”
“Eating celery gives a bigger load”
“That women don’t like porn”
“Small penises are useless”
“I thought squirting was pee until my boyfriend made me do it. I was shocked. It wasn’t a lot like pee but it was crazy.”
“That deeper is better in vaginal sex”
“There’s no such thing as a bad BJ”
“If it feels good to me, the other person must be happy too”
“You couldn’t get pregnant during your period”
“Ass play is gross”
“Men like their balls squeezed”
