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Dear Class of DDS4,
I know that many of you will not be interested in reading this message and I don’t blame you. If that is the case please keep it for later.
As a previous member of the DDS4 Gentlemen’s group (something I am not proud of and will regret for the rest of my life) I wanted to make a public apology to all those involved. In order to do so would require a message sent to the entire country, but I felt it was best to send it to you first as you—MY FAMILY—the entire class of 2015 deserve to hear it first.
While I did not play a direct involvement in the hurtful comments brought forth, I apologize for being a bystander.
For those unaware, I was one of the people directly involved with bringing this forward. I know that waiting so long to take action will be among the largest regrets in my lifetime.
Seeing the recent posts had an immediate shock factor for me. I immediately realized that things had progressed within the group to a level that was beyond anyones control.
Later that night, as I held my one-month-old daughter in my arms, I shed quite a few tears thinking about how I would feel if her name was among those in the post. My two-year-old son also came to mind, as I imagined the hurt I would experience to have him voting on such an event.
No father can stand idly by with this happening and consider himself a man. I knew it was time to step forward. My children deserve to know their father did the right thing.
The manner in which things came forth wasn’t the smoothest and I feel so bad for all of the damage that this will cause to the school, all members of the faculty of dentistry and the profession as a whole.
To those that were not direct victims: I apologize for the devaluation of your degree due to these events and the devaluation of the hard work we have all put in to get to this point in our education.
To the direct victims: I am eternally sorry for the damage caused by what has occurred. You deserve far more respect as daughters of god, and for the hard work you have devoted to getting to this point in your career.
To the gentlemen: I cannot sincerely apologize enough for being so proud as to abandon my own convictions and allow our actions to carry on unchecked. I let you down as a brother for not stepping in sooner and stopping this.
I hope that you will all, with time, find the place in your hearts to forgive me. I know many of you may never, and that is something I completely understand. Forgiveness and trust are the two things that are earned and I know it will take quite some time to mend this situation.
I have no hard feelings for any person in our class and wish nothing but the best for all of you as I consider you family. For those unaware I have found dental school to be the hardest thing I have ever done. I often compare it to the greatest battle I have ever fought. With that in mind, I am proud to have fought it side-by-side with each and every one of you.
I’m sorry.
Ryan Millet
Class of 2015
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This article appears in Dec 18-24, 2014.
I think that the writer has had a revelation and made a confession to clear his own conscience. He has two children. He is no longer a member of the club. He has nothing to lose. His advantage? He blew the whistle when it was convenient for HIM, and HIS conscience. He saw the proverbial light and decided to right a wrong. Im surprised that this letter was circulated and then allowed to be published. Turning a once member into a martyr. What a great guy…or is he? He has had time to figure out that being an a$$hole in the real world with real people, and real consequences is not cool. Not cool at all. His methods and motive are questionable. Im sure the women involved appreciate and deserve someone to stand up for them. Im sure this was the right thing to do. I only hope it was done for the right reasons.
He still calls himself their brother though!
Why not a name to make it geniune, seriously.
why should believe this is truly one of the people discussed? no name= no integrity
Thank you for your courage. This must be an incredibly difficult time for you. We, the women of Canada, thank you so very much for standing up and doing the right thing.
TO THE AUTHOR:
You and your “gentleman friends” need to do more than bring this to light and apologize, especially if ANY of you plan on having daughters. Here is a start:
http://www.manifestchange.ca/
http://www.whiteribbon.ca/
Just trying to save his career. Chicken shit six ways from Sunday.
Wow. He had my respect until [NAME WITHHELD BY REQUEST]. The apology loses all validity. By writing this anonymously, he is by and large, speaking on behalf of his gentlemen classmates – even the ass who says, “fuck an apology”.
Sorry, guy. This apology holds no weight with me.
“I am proud to have fought it side-by-side with each and every one of you..” Proud, are you? These DDS4 “gentlemen” may well have caused irreparable damage to the professional reputations of all the men in your class, not to mention the dental school as a whole.
I do thank you for speaking out, wish you would of published your name since your apologizing and all or maybe your afraid that someone will cast a finger at you still. I am glad however that you looked at your own children and thought to yourself, your kids are going up in this world and someone day it could be your son would who treat and speak about women that way or your daughter could be the victim of such cruelty. People tend to forget that it could happen to them, their family, their children and they would be very upset and would want justice done. But like others have said. Don’t be afraid to say your name, the fact you are standing up and saying something, you will have people stand by your side and be proud of you for doing the right thing.
Some interesting word choices here:
“No father can…consider himself a man”
Women deserve respect as “daughters of God”, not as human beings on their own.
Why is “being a man” still considered a position of privilege and/or responsibility? Why does it still take man-god to imbue women with value? This still drips with assumed patriarchy.
It’s interesting to see that many of the people who called this guy out and consider him insincere, and were critical of him for not publishing his name, withheld their own names. There were actually more more people (by percentage) in *this * thread (as opposed to others on The Coast related to this subject) that disclosed what appear to be actual names than what people usually do, but it’s still pretty close to 50/50 at best. Pretty easy to slam someone for not revealing their identity when you don’t have the guts to do so yourself.
Myself, I don’t reveal my identity for the same reason that this man – who you have no reason to believe is not genuinely remorseful, although a few of you jumped all over his ass because you don’t think he really regrets his actions or thinking – didn’t reveal his. Number one, two and three, because you’ll have cowards with attitudes hiding behind a fake name who shit over someone who is Everyman, and for fairly understandable reasons he didn’t want half the feminazis in Nova Scotia camped out on his dooryard.
It is actually possible for someone to be penitent. Last I checked, pretty much all of us have f**ked up, and we only ‘fessed and were sorry after we were caught out. Oh, wait, sorry…many of us are perfect, apparently. Pretty easy to cast stones when you feel righteous.
On that note, “missjay”‘s thinking for example is remarkable. Children and teenagers – perhaps some of you anonymous posters have a few, or have yourself been children or teenagers or young adults at some point – typically learn from screwing up and being stupid. Oh, sorry, I forgot – a lot of us are apparently perfect.
@Realist: These aren’t children or teenagers. They’re adults one year away from being doctors.
We are in deep deep trouble if we have to wait for a man to have a daughter before he realizes that men shouldn’t think about/treat women in such a crude and hateful way. Has this always been the way it is? I find it very sad.
really ? you claim that you acted as a “man” when ratted your fellow group members out? no sir you are not a man, you are a spineless jelly fish . A real man if would not have stayed a member of this group for several years and i am sure your brothers would be more than happy to enlighten us of your own indiscretions over the years . ” secondly A real man would have stood up and voiced an objection to them and made some attempt to set them straight. those would be the actions of a man, instead you scurried off like a rat, and threw them under the bus , and now you are trying to vindicate your self in the public eye by publishing some lame attempt at an apology . I don’t buy it go peddle your alligator tears somewhere else.
those women deserved better from you and your brothers , and you are doing them a disservice by being a fake martyr
This guy got a whif of the karma coming back to him and his circle-jerk buddies. Was it really worth the giddiness of fantacisizing out loud about rape? Now you have a county-worth of women who want to spit in your face and ruin you lives. That was some really great judgment and decision making, future doctors! Put a name on your letter and actually stand up for violence against women unless you’re afraid your bros are going to use chloroform and hate fuck you.
All I can say is that if i was in the group and someone ratted me out … it would not be a pretty scene sir. All you’ve done is expose 1 of the 10000000 groups, websites, chains, and under the table discussion boards. No real harm would have come from this group … majority of dentists, and other DAL students probably have been in a group or something that they regret during the course of their careers and have not been exposed. All you have done is brought UNNECESSARY shame to your classmates and Dalhousie University (MY University which i bleed black and gold for). You have forced the University into an impossible situation. Cant wait till your name comes out, which it will, and you forever go down in the history books as being ‘that guy’.
– A Dalhousie University Graduate.
I am glad that at least one of the ‘gentlemen’ saw this group as out of control and came forward. Maybe the wording in the letter wasn’t perfect, etc., but he stepped up and brought this into the open where it can be addressed. I admire that.
“Seeing the recent posts had an immediate shock factor for me. I immediately realized that things had progressed within the group to a level that was beyond anyones control.”
Note: It was ALWAYS in your control. You choose to be a degenerate and participate in this misogyny and rape fantasy along with the other 12 degenerates. When invited to join this group, did your brain and thoughts of your family kick in to make you think it is a good venue or you just thought you could enjoy your perversion under the radar? You did bring it forward. Good per-emptive strike. It would have exploded sooner or later.
Even the apology is frustrating. He doesn’t even realize how thick with entitlement his words are. For those who didn’t catch it, what he’s saying, is that he feels that as the guy in the group who now has a daughter, it was his responsibility to point out to the non-fathers (because how ELSE would they know) that women should be respected.
BUT, not because we are people in our own right, but because we are daughters. As in, we belong to a man, and men should not mess with other men’s stuff.
This is what entitlement, disguised as compassion and understanding, looks like.
We are people. NOT belongings. NOT something to own.
When will these losers finally get it?
A few notes to the posters. First, the complaints that he didn’t realize anything was wrong until looking at his daughter – that is not what he said. He said the escalation in posts is what hit him. Later, looking at his daughter, simply caused more reflection. Secondly, on the comment about escalation, many posters are writing as if these types of posts had been there all along. We don’t know that. One of the most common and yet most unfair practise we have as human beings is to judge people without all of the facts. Finally, about the “name withheld” bit – it may be withheld for the media, but you can bet everyone in his class knows who it is, and he knows that. Even if his name was withheld to the class when he sent the message, this is a small class, and by revealing the age and sex of his two children, the cat is out of the bag. I was never in Dentistry, but as a medical student (and med school has about 3 times the class size) I stood out as one of only a small fee who had children. This man was not hiding in anonymity from those who were affected.
On a final note, lest it be misunderstood – I do not condone this behaviour. It is unfortunate that these attitudes exist. It is bad enough that immature High School or even Undergrad university students might have these thoughts, but these men should be in their later 20s – a bit late to play the immaturity card. I am not convinced that expulsion is the right course, as I do not have all of the information. Some discipline surely is required, but we should not be looking to burn these people at the stake based on the mostly one-sided view we have of it all.
Although I would expect more from such highly educated people, in life humans make mistakes. People are so quick to judge without knowing all the facts involved. I feel terrible for all involved, but will reserve judgement as I don’t know all the facts.
Dalhousie Graduate
Health profession
The language in this is gross and highlights the problem exactly – daughters of god? Your bravest battle? Get off the game of thrones boy. A woman doesn’t have to be a man’s daughter to deserve respect. Its humanity, not how she qualifies to you. If her father signed his name, that would have been doing the right thing for humanity, not just for his own ego.
Eileen, please do not speak on behalf of anybody but yourself. I do not thank this man, and many of us think he is at least as bad as any of the others. I HATE that the implication is that men who do not have children do not have any way of deciding this is wrong. These are MEN, and they are behaving this way because they are misogynists. Plain and simple as that. Going to be dentists, which means almost all of them are also part of the group that has always been privileged in this country. If anything, this idiot has done more damage to the university. This is his last ditch attempt to appear as if he is innocent, which he surely is NOT. Maybe if this group of so-called ‘men’ is punished by not graduating, then ‘men’ everywhere will stop and think for a minute or two. It will take extreme measures to eradicate this sort of thinking, since it is bred in the bone from birth.
“half the feminazis in Nova Scotia camped out on his dooryard.” -Realist in Dartmouth
Feminazis?
This level of degrading nomenclature is commensurate with the misogynistic thinking that pervades our patriarchal society. Get help.
It was ‘beyond anyones control’??
What a f’in dips**t. The only redeeming fact for this guy is that he claims to have been responsible for getting it stopped. But seriously: “beyond anyones control”? No wonder DDS has been the hardest thing you have ever done, if setting up a rape poll is beyond the control of the dolt setting it up.
Honestly, those directly involved in posting should be expelled. There is no good reason to trust any of them to be in any healthcare profession after this. In one fell swoop they’ve managed to disgrace themselves while quite possibly wasting years of their life and destroying their careers to boot (Slow clap), I hope it was worth it because you’ll find no sympathy here. As for the author, an apology whether sincere or not does not absolve you from any participation you may have had in this. I can’t fathom what would compel anybody to do this, on a social media site no less. I would expect much more professional behavior from somebody aspiring to be a dentist, or in literally any other job for that matter. Hopefully the rest of the dentistry students do not have to suffer a damaged reputation due to the actions of a few halfwits.
apologies are good, but anonymity makes it weird. and the tone of this is kind of all over the place.
more generally:
it should go without saying that people who think rape is great shouldn’t be qualified to any profession involving anaesthetics.
the fact that it does not is evidence that we need a strong militant feminist movement in halifax, and everywhere.
The Dal President thinking so little of women – his crocodile tears with interview with Steve Murphy. Dal should have done something and expelled the men. Not a surpise nothing was done by Fluoride Florizone. He condones vivisection on cats, dogs, rabbits. Been going on for decades despite non-animal alternative. Shameful
https://twitter.com/lifebettergreen/status/545420340651106304/photo/1
First, I don’t agree with anything that was said in this Facebook group. It’s flat out wrong and there is no excuse for it. That said, I can’t believe all the stone throwers in this comment thread. Everyone is looking at the specific words he chose and challenging his sincerity and questioning the words he chose to explain himself, trying to find hidden meaning by the words he chose and that’s not what people should be focusing on.
If you want to read it for what it really is here is what he is saying: “I didn’t participate, but I stood by and watched for too long. However, I did come forward once I realized things were getting out of control and he apologized for not coming forward sooner.”
As for anonymously posting, this was a letter he sent to his classmates to which he would have published his name and a 3rd party brought the letter to the Coast and he agreed to let it be published anonymously. This wasn’t an apology letter meant for you or me so the expectation that he publish his name is ridiculous. It wasn’t created for our eyes in the first place. Get over it.
Now, how does ANYONE have a right to criticize this man? If he didn’t participate in the hateful conversations then this man hasn’t done any more wrong than you or I have in our lives. I mean honestly, do you call the authorities when your spouse breaks the speed limit? Should you have points on your driving record because you didn’t stop the driver from speeding while you were in the car? How many of you have been in a circle of people when someone makes a sexist, racist or otherwise offensive comment and you simply think to yourself, “wow, that was bad” and then kept on going with your life? Should we be calling you a racist, sexist or otherwise because you were within earshot and didn’t call the human rights commission or the police? Everyone needs to get off their high horses and cut this guy a break. As far as I am concerned, if he didn’t do or say any of the comments, or participate in those specific conversations then this man should not be punished. If it turns out he did then his feet should be put to the fire then and he should be judged on his specific participation. What I gather from this letter though is that he wasn’t a participant.
This is exactly why mob justice is flawed and why I’m happy to see that Dalhousie is approaching the situation in a manner where they’re gong to get all the facts first, they’re going to evaluate the impacts on all parties involved and THEN make decisions on punishment. When the dust settles there will be punishment, but let’s let the University do their job and get all of the information before they make life altering decisions for those involved. Actual rapists and murders still get a trial you know.
I’ve heard a few things on this thread that resonate with me. For instance, I noticed that I, too, was put off by the language of the letter. I felt reminded of the letters/statements that I have seen from soldiers, who regret what they have done in combat (WWII), but still feel an obligation to the ‘good cause’ and their comrades. I would call this language pretentious, presumptions, however, I will let his classmates, to whom this letter was addressed, be the judges of that. Maybe that’s how they talk to each other? Maybe their experience has a war-like quality? I wouldn’t be surprised, as it seems that the education our medical professional receive is more about competition and ambition than about compassion and collaboration. (This might be a sidebar at this point, but this may contribute to systemic misogyny: under pressure we are all much more likely to forget about the humanity of our fellows and to maintain a position of superiority we need to continuously reinforce it by dis-empowering the ones we want to dominate.)
The other thing that I find interesting in this context is the question of whether or not somebody should be held responsible for standing by and letting stuff happen. I was born and raised in Europe, where the principle of “Duty to Assist” is quite strong, that means you can become criminally liable when you are not stepping in to protect and safe someone else. You are only exempt from this responsibility if there is danger to your life and health, but still you would be required to inform the authorities as soon as safely possible. (see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duty_to_rescu…)
I think the “Duty to Assist” makes sense in the context of sexual, racial, etc. harassment . A) Because ultimately everybody is affected when these go unchecked. This is illustrated by Gentlemen-gate: It is not only the Class of 2015, not only the School of Dentistry, not only Dal, that are embarrassed. I almost feel ashamed to say: yes, I too, am from Halifax; yes, I too, have graduated from a professional program at a Canadian university. I am ashamed to say that I live in a society that lets sexism and racism fester.
B) Sexual, racial, etc. harassment really impact the degree of safety we all experience in public spaces. When I hear (or suspect) that one group of people verbally degrades another group of people, I have to conclude that they would do the same to me if given a chance. Lack of perceived safety equals lack of trust equals lack of communication, lack of learning, of productivity, etc. I feel that we as individuals have to stand up in the moment, as it happens (not just call on the Human Rights Commission that takes and average of 233 days to resolve a complaint).
I realize none of this is legally relevant. I am just offering these thoughts as a contribution to the collective learning process that is – no doubt – taking place.
Also, I realize that the roots of the sexist, racist, etc. attitudes run deep. They also run deep in our institutions. Because of that I believe these institutions must take somewhat radical steps to address the issue. I favor that the Dal Administration takes disciplinary action towards all gentlemen involved. This may not be ‘fair’ to the all individuals, but would set a precedent, which might be of more benefit to the community in the long run. I take this position knowing that I am not perfect myself. I have failed my community in many instances – sometimes I had to suffer the consequences, sometimes I got away with it. Life is not fair, but we’re in it together.
Taking it at face value, while I’m glad the letter-writer had an epiphany and squealed on the the “gentlemen’s group”, it’s an odd letter. It manages to combine grandiosity and slightly off-putting religious imagery (daughters of god? Really?) with what I think is a sincere apology.
Two points which I think have been missing in the discussion:
1) The president can’t expel people on a whim any more than the PM can arbitrarily imprison someone. I’m not sure I’d want to go to a university where that was the case. Had the formal process been undertaken (ie – not restorative justice), a hearing of the senate disciplinary committee would have to take place. The student’s would have to be given at least 10 working days notice. Given the winter break and the difficulties in getting staff and students for it, I imagine that the earliest this could happen would be some time in the new year. Even if this process was/is adopted, it’s “in camera”, meaning the names of the students involved would be confidential.
2) Restorative Justice (processes which include the TRCs in South Africa and for residential schools here) isn’t the “tap on the wrist” that people seem to think it is, nor is it “sitting around and talking about your feelings”. RJ is a process which places the victim and the harmed communities at the centre of the process, as opposed to retributive justice where the victim is pushed to the side as others determine the fate of the wrongdoer. Retributive Justice would deal only with the students who posted in the group, and punish them to the extent the decision maker felt was appropriate. Even if they were expelled from the program and run out of the province on a rail, the harm they caused and the underlying culture that spawned their actions would remain. It is also likely that the “gentlemen” wouldn’t fully appreciate why their actions were wrong, and would continue to harbour misogynistic sentiments.
I say “communities” because there are a number at issue here: The women specifically referenced in the group, female students at Dal and the Dalhousie community in general, and Nova Scotians who may someday need dental services and wonder if their Doc is one of these individuals. All of those groups have been harmed (to various extents – some more than others) by the actions of these individuals.
While RJ is can be helpful in these situations, often has higher victim satisfaction and lower recidivism, having only read about what has happened in various news outlets I can’t say for certain whether it is the right way forward in this case. However, bashing RJ and dragging up the same “soft on crime” talking points of the CPC doesn’t do any good.
What resonates is his admission the behaviour escalated over time. Inching forward, checking to see if the ice is still holding, another step forward.
I can imagine the author of this piece being uncomfortable for some time and hoping the situation would self-correct. When he came to the realization that it would only get worse, that is when he acted.
We are always shocked when we learn that the men involved in things like pedo rings and the like are so often highly placed professionals and politicians. These things do not just suddenly appear one day. There’s a process that keeps testing the ice, normalizing of the abnormal that does escalate over time. Does anyone really suppose this little band of brothers united by hate would just evaporate on grad day? When people share dark desires, it binds them for a lifetime unless some external event blows it apart. The courageous action of this one man saved how many future victims?
So, to anonymous, thank-you. It would be much better for humanity as a whole if more stepped up and risked the wrath of the group (national socialism in Germany circa 1930s) to stop the hideous behaviour that only escalates over time.
@Blingfried: I couldn’t agree more with your statement until the end…. “These aren’t children or teenagers. They’re adults one year away from being DENTISTS.” Dentists and doctors are not the same thing. FYI to all those who keep posting as if they are: they are in different faculties at Dalhousie.
I wouldn’t condemn this man for his writing style – admission to dental school doesn’t focus on the highest standards of English, and he certainly isn’t alone among univeristy grads whose writing makes them sound thicker than 2 planks. I know a number of very recent dental grads (not at this school) including my son, and I’m not surprised at the way he describes the experience as something like a trial by fire. For most of them, it’s bloody hard. I had men and women tell me at grad last spring that without each other, they never would have survived the 4 years. Now I feel sorry for this guy, not only because I really think his future is behind him and he’s probably looking at a now unmanageable student loan – but because he just doesn’t sound too bright, in the ways that are so important outside the dentistry lab.
Do the crime, pay with time!
I believe it is a step in the right direction. At least he is owning his part in the whole thing and trying to make amends. People make mistakes. The situation has increased a lot of dialogue about important human issues. Not just feminist values, but respect in general and will stimulate further discussion as the process roles out. I appreciate the effort and sincerity in the letter by Annonymous and I hope it helps begin some healing.
Honestly, I don’t get people. Yes what they did was wrong, no I do not think they are innocent, but I look at the whole picture. The choices they made degraded their viewpoint of women but does degrading them even the fact? This man for example has opened himself up and made himself vulnerable in hopes of showing his sorrow and asking for forgiveness. By definition he braver than all of you. For as you decide to harass him behind the safety of your screen, he is constantly abused and battered and does not swing back. No, there is nothing to do to undo the situation but why make it worse by bringing hate into the matter. If you were to be “Good People” you would not be insulting them but be trying to help them walk in the right direction. I disagree with everything the page stood for and morals behind it but is the matter justified by becoming disrespectful. Realize that everyone makes mistakes, the world is an imperfect place but maybe if we try to help versus put down, maybe the world will be a better place.
Prayers for EVERYONE in this matter
Nobody has come forward with anything. This letter means nothing and took no courage to write since there is no signature.
I think this person is sincere and sorry, he has ruined his career and disgraced his friends, family and community….he is suffering as I am sure some of the others are as well….as far as everybody wanting to know the names of this group may be important to some (clients especially) I personally don’t think it is important. I think that these people would be harassed and threatened in their everyday life, let the schools police and families deal with them…..nobody is perfect and all have done something they regret…their own personal and professional suffering that will be endured I think is punishment enough. This letter is a good first step in the right direction for this young man!!
Of course,,this is an apology.You have been given a privilege of being a student of Dal.There .are many people that did not make it into Dalhousie.The university picks the highest of standard of students,so therefore we the public expect those graduating are those to be proud of.Unfortuneatly,this has not been a good act to scar the reputation of one of the greatest and most sought after University ,s in the world .I sure hope you were an innocent bystander,you being a father,should appreciate the level of anxiety that the girls targeted feel
Get off your soapboxes..I hear worse joke than that in my hockey dressing room every week and none of those guys have hurt anyone. Did you all laugh at Jennifer Annistons character in angry bosses…because I don’t remember the Internet mob camping out at theaters in protest, hey she was a dentist too. So many people with nothing better to do but act in outrage and judge others. Have any of these “gentlemen” actually committed a crime beyond bad taste of do the thought police have a bigger file on the accused. I am so sick of the great Internet Twitter mob…get a life.
I think you should feel shame for ruining the lives of your trusted classmates…sure this content was inappropriate, but never ment to make it to the public…as one of two women in a class of 20…I would never betray the trust of my colleagues, my friends; even if I personally had been highly offended, with my feelings hurt….what a spectacle you have made of some crude joking…you wont get a pat on the back from me…your a fraud among friends.
I don’t and will not accept any man’s apology for what they think and say on the internet. These people are potential professionals in a health care profession and they all should be kicked out of their profession. I am ashamed to call myself a man because of these people. I can’t express how unimpressed I am about this letter also. What are these continuing words of misogyny , learn to accept the consequences of your actions. To the person writing this letter, I have one thing to say to you. Bullshit. If you weren’t caught you wouldn’t have said anything to this effect or manner.
Connie Lyoid – How is he attempting to appear innocent? His name remains anonymous.
I find it interesting how many people are so quick to judge public disgraces, yet day to day life indicates that only a minority of people in their own personal interactions make the courageous step to confront or expose harmful actions of others. Perhaps the overwhelming public exposure and condemnation is part of the problem. I wonder if, as individuals, we resolved to be a little more courageous and a little more forgiving, we could create a change in our own corners of the world?
If anyone here believe that any professional you know in a position of trust (doctors, dentists, lawyers, brokers, realtors arc.) has never at any time interacted with their friends or colleagues in a similar manner, then you are way out of f**king touch with reality.
These types of displays are termed as “posturing” and all young men peacock like this in some fashion, often saying (or in this case, writing) stupid and regrettable things. Things like this are said, not because these individuals are “hate mongers”, but because they generally aim for shock value and intend to elicit a response from their audience. If we as a society are to be held accountable for everything we have said in our lives, we would ALL be classified as hateful, racist, sexist, bigoted, evil-doers. Most of us know, that this is obviously not the case.
As for the members of Dal Dentistry, I can only imagine they’ve learned their lesson about being social media morons many times over by now. These men will forever have a lesser value associated with their diploma due to this whole (very avoidable) situation. I, as a man, who has said some outrageous and stupid things in my youth completely empathize with these young men. I do not know any of them, so I can’t speak on their behalf, but a thread posted by @Marlene Anderson called them a “little brotherhood united by hate”. How the hell can you classify it like that, when (I’m assuming) you know nothing about the individuals in this group. You further go on to relate this situation to 1930’s Nazi Germany. Are you f**king mental?! This group posted lewd comments for shock value; the Nazi’s started the largest conflict in human history and ruthlessly murdered millions of innocent people. Get off your pretentious high horse and see things at ground level!
Lastly, for the author of this article, @Amanda Oakley summed it up best “you’re a fraud among friends.” The only thing she could have added to land it better is you call you a snitch. I don’t care if you feel genuine about your apology or not (the whole crying with the one month old daughter on your lap was a cheap attempt at drama), you went about this the absolute worst possible way. You have tarnished your reputation, the reputation of 13 students (who are likely decent human beings), and most importantly you tarnished the reputation of a fantastic dental school and the entirety of Dalhousie University. It is ludicrous to believe that after interacting with these colleagues for the past few years, that this facebook group was a complete surprise to you. You’re entering a profession in which people are likely going to remember your name (moreso than those gentlemen suspended) as someone who can’t be a team player. Best of luck.
And the Oscar goes to……….Mr Anonymous
Oh come on, there is no way one of the students actually wrote this… this is fake.
The whole situation is sad. All involved are going to have a long road of healing. In my 25 years of teaching I have come to realize that punishment is the worst form of discipline as it teaches nothing and there’s no real change in ideas and no furthering of social justice. Many very respectable members of society acted badly and said some very hurtful, and offensive things in my years in dealing with students. They are all good people, though exhibited poor judgement in the past. Who hasn’t done at least one thing that was ridiculously stupid? Many are probably glad they weren’t called on it, and hope it remains as a skeleton in their closet of “stupid things I’ve done as a student or young adult.”
I hope some type of restorative approach will help them heal. Maybe we can all learn from it to be better citizens. I myself will not throw the first stone, as I’m certain I have and will make hurtful mistakes, … Learn from them,… And grow as I move past them.
Lol, I don’t know what’s more laughable, the righteous indignation of some women who refuse to accept there are female versions of the ‘douchebag’ that have said equally crude and mean spirited things, or, whether or not any of the women in this class. (or anyone for that matter) is buying what this assclown is selling.
apology accepted
Johnnyhew97: You can only deal with the ones you catch. The DDS13 have been caught. Deal with it.