qMy husband and I have been together for about four years and have been married for a little over a year. He’s 31; I’m 27. We started out as friends and soon began a long-distance relationship, until I got pregnant. We have a great friendship, and I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else. Here’s […]
Dan Savage
Posted inLifestyle
Asshole commentaries
Q I have lived with my boyfriend for almost two years. He says he loves me and does a lot of loving things for me. We are both in our early 60s, but we have the sexual energy of 20-year-olds. Here’s the problem: I am overweight (size 18). I was overweight when he met me. […]
Posted inLifestyle
A hint of gay panic
Q: My boyfriend of 16 months and I have a great relationship. He loves my blowjobs, but he will not kiss me if I have his come in my mouth. It grosses him out. We have talked about this, and he won’t even try. I have no problem if he kisses me after going down […]
Posted inLifestyle
Savage Love: live on tour
I dropped by four large universities last week—University of Lethbridge, State University of New York-Albany, University of Maryland and University of Alaska-Anchorage—to do “Savage Love Live,” the college-speaking-gig version of my sex-advice column. I enjoyed visiting all four campuses and, as ever, learned a few things out on the road. (Brinking? Who knew?) People submit […]
Posted inLifestyle
Free spirited, my ass.
Q: Recently, I celebrated my first year of marriage to the most amazing man. When we first began dating, he told me that he enjoys open sexuality and wants swinging to be part of any partnership he’s in. I regard myself as free-spirited and agreed to explore this with him. We delayed experimentation because I […]
Posted inLifestyle
Smear tactics
Q: My girlfriend and I are into male-orgasm denial. We’ve recently tried putting Orajel on my cock and then covering it with two condoms so she can use me as a dildo without me getting off or even feeling anything. It works great. Is there any chance of long-term health issues if we do this […]
Posted inLifestyle
Cold feet
Q: Why do guys wear socks on their feet in porn? I say it’s a tradition. My friends claim it is a foot-fetish thing. My credibility rides on this, so thanks for answering. Socked In Denver A: Socks in porn a tradition? Sorry, SID, but no. Socks on feet in porn—as opposed to socks on […]
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Good vibrations
Q: I love the wife I married two years ago, but she absolutely can’t come unless she uses a vibrator on herself. She’s asked me to let her use it during sex or for me to use it on her, but I’ve refused. It’s bad enough knowing I can’t compete with that thing without having […]
Posted inLifestyle
Saddleback, part 2: the definitions
q I’m going to Barack Obama’s inauguration in Washington, D.C., on January 20. I’ve spent eight years, one month, one week and one day waiting for this. (But who’s counting?) However, I am looking for suggestions for a respectful way to protest the participation of Rick Warren. As a lifelong Episcopalian, I really don’t want […]
Posted inLifestyle
Dealing positively
Dan Savage says don’t ride the third rail. qI’m an 18-year-old straight female. Two nights ago, I went to a party. My ex-boyfriend was present, but my current boyfriend was not. I had several beers and while I wasn’t drunk, I was tipsy. I had to go to my car to get my cellphone and […]
Posted inLifestyle
What’s a saddleback?
Q Here’s your chance to deal with the problems of a couple of senior citizens: I am a woman in my late 60s and my “boyfriend” is five years older. We were lovers long ago. He came looking for me a few years ago and we reunited. We live on opposite sides of the country, […]
Posted inLifestyle
Savage Love
QOK, I need a kick in the face or something.My boyfriend of two years and I broke up a little more than a week ago. He cheated. But there’s a bit more to the story: He was a raging alcoholic, and I’ve broken up with him a few times. One of those times—when he was […]
