Honestly, if you wanted to go to dinner with me, a friend, why the hell did you spend the ENTIRE time on your cell. Every single time the waiter came to our table it was me sitting there starring at you texting on your phone. Instead of having a conversation with 10 people in texting-world, how about having a real one in front of you. First off, it’s rude. Secondly, it makes me look bad, and uninteresting. And thirdly, it makes you look so dependent on a dinky little piece of plastic that is 5 inches from your face that it is embarrassing. By the end of it the waiter was even giving me looks of sympathy to be going out to dinner with a some random person and their phone. Call me when you get some phone etiquette.
—Rite in front of U
This article appears in Oct 22-28, 2009.
This has little to do with “phone etiquette” and everything to do with DISRESPECT for you. Get a better date.
Blame the victim kay…
I cannot agree with the OP more. And it has nothing to do with the OP and everything to do with the culture of young idiots that we are now raising. You cannot go ANYWHERE without seeing people walking around with their heads down texting someone. I was out for a get together lats week at a pub and 3 people at our table spent half the night on their blackberries. I finally brought it into the conversation who stupid I though that it was and they stopped. I was probably not too popular but oh well. Get a fucking life people! Believe it or not there IS life outside of yoru stupdi fucking facebok that you feel you need to check every 2 minutes to see who may be having a shit! We are raising a generation of people who have NO face to face social skilss and the reaosn is, they cannot communicate unless they are on a computer. Sad really.
If the “victim” had better taste in selecting a date they wouldn’t have gone on a date with a cell phone. Floyd, are you saying the cell phone use was “respectful” behavior shown towards the OP? Come on, qualify your bullshit!
The name crackberry says it all. I have one. As a matter of fact, its how I do all my posting because I don’t actually own a computer. But if I’m out with friends, socializing, whatnot, its off. Because its rude.
This is my biggest pet peeve, and its not only young people, its everyone who has a blackberry. I know people older and younger than myself who text and surf all day long, the difference is the older ones that do it are usually business types who are work-a-holics or just want people to think they are more important than they really are, the younger ones, like my sister, are completely lost without it in their hands. No joke my sister’s bb was stolen and her landlord let her be late on rent so she could purchase a new one…??? He apparently thought that was a good enough reason. (It was also in NYC)??
And what’s with the people who walk and text with their head down just assuming everyone will move?…crazy thing is people DO move, I’ve seen people part huge crowds of people just by looking down into their phones and barrelling forward.
Let’s change this behaviour by calling people out on how rude it is, maybe embarrassment will change people. Next time you’re in a grocery store and the woman ahead of you is chatting away and not paying attention to the poor clerk who is trying to ask a question or whatever, Say really loudly “HOW RUDE” or next time you see someone walking with their nose burried and fingers tapping, plow right into them.
Amen lorilulu!! Amen!!
I’ve been on a few dates where they’ve been on their cell texting or talking too much. I don’t tolerate that shit anymore. If they take more than 2 texts/calls while they’re with me, I politely ask the waiter/waitress for my bill, pay and leave. When asked I simply tell them “you’re more interested in your phone than me, so why should I waste any more of my time or yours?”.
Of course its not respectful behaviour kay you fucking idiot. Your point of view is so typically narrow-minded. You seem to think the OP somehow knew in advance that this was going to happen, and chose to go on the date anyway. And therefore it is her own fault and she somehow deserves this treatment.
No wonder everyone on here despises you.
This sort of thing happens a lot. It’s sad because people are really losing their social skills. In terms of conducting business, I can understand to a point; but I have a friend whose boyfriend does this to her all the time. If you are going to be doing business on your blackberry, why the hell would you ask your girlfriend out on a date knowing full well that you couldn’t give her your attention? The worst part of it all is that it’s so prevalent that people sit back and let it happen to them.
It’s stupid to jump on me for stating the obvious. Imagine if I had gotten all fucking metaphorical on your ass. Go get a coffee or something you miserable dip shit.
i do call people out when they do this…and usually get a blank who me look…they are so self absorbed that i imagine they will get smoked by something big and inanimate like a bus or perhaps someone large and angry and very animated…either way let the culling of the herd start with these leotards
I got a new phone a few weeks ago and I have messenger on it and…I’m now one of those assholes on the bus with the phone 5 inches from their face…I don’t walk and text though because that’s just LAME and I’d never text someone or talk on my cell when I was out with someone. NGF can attest to that — the only person who ever calls me on my cell anyway is my mom and that’s just to make sure I’m not dead. Once I tell her I’m still alive she fucks off and it’s back to the company I’m in. If I didn’t answer when she called she’d probably file a missing person’s report swear to GOD.
People who do this are douches. When I’m out my phone is on vibrate and will get back to the person when I’m free.
I barely answer my door, or my home phone….my cell phone is for me to call out…I always have it on silent. I love e-mail and text messaging…you tell me what you want, I’ll get back to you when I feel like it.
If I’m ever out with friends who text or are on the phone a lot, I just text them or call them…that usually stops it.
Was this a dating situation? Didn’t the OP state that it was a friend who asked them out for a meal together. Whatever the scenerio, paying attention to an electronic device instead of the social situation you are attending is rude, inconsiderate and indicates a lack of self-control. I’ve always been a fan of Miles’ approach.
That’s a good one miles! I can’t wait to use it!
AHAHAHAHA that’s brilliant miles!
I don’t answer my door or home phone either, really, unless I know who’s calling and I want to talk to them 😛 (my “door” is a call in from the lobby — when I see the company name I just ignore it unless I’m expecting someone).
And the only people who know my cell number are my parents (because they’d OMG HAVE A SHIT FIT if they couldn’t get a hold of me — yes, they are extremely attached *eyeroll*) and NGF. That’s it. My cell’s for me to call out too.
Thanks guys. It’s a variation on an old trick I used to use when I would lose the “one sec, I’ve got a beep” wars back in the day when call waiting got introduced. I always hated when someone would hang up on me just to answer the other line. If they did, I just called them back to see if they would ditch the person who just called and talk to me again. That pissed people off too but they stopped ditching me for beeps.
The ‘not’ answering the door Miles , reminds me of home.
Last time I was visiting the ole homestead someone came to the front door & rang the bell. I said, “I’ll get it” & my dear old nanny & a cousin who were in the kitchen both said…”don’t bother”.
You see , if they knew us, they would have just walked right in. With that kind of logic, I can see the Jehova’s ,Mormons, or just door to door Sales People never getting to meet anyone.
I just got out of the habit, from living in cities. We never knocked, when I was young ,we always just walked in.
I always find it irritating and rude when I’m out with a friend and they spend most of their time on the phone. I’d probably be better off staying home and just texting them.
In my sidewalk fantasy I would be the Scott Steven of SGR. I would cruise the sidewalk looking for people texting with their heads down and I would line them up from a block away. I would zero in on my target as they approached and KAAAAABOOOOM -destroy them with a huge open-ice hit circa 1999 NJ Devils. I might even hip check them through a shop window or stuff them in a mailbox if they mouthed off.
Yeah, in my dreams I would be that awesome….
I would never even imagine answering my phone or texting when I was out someone, its so rude.
People who abuse Blackberry etiquette should be forced to attend a camp where the only phone is one of those dial pay phones from the pre-1982 ferry terminal, and the only internet is sub 30kb email.
This just happened….200 people listening to a distinguished guest lecturer when a phone ring in the audience (about the 5th one in 40mins mind you)….
In a shamelessly normal speaking voice:
“Hello…Speaking…..yeah, we can do that….Hey, I’m in a lecture right now, I’m gonna have to call you back…..no, I won’t be around then…yeah, OK, 5 o’clock sounds good”
He got about 20 dirty looks, 2 shushes and an audible “Be quite!”. He didn’t care.
no mj they should have to use a party line…whats that you ask, sorry i have to adjust my b/w t.v.
“”If they did, I just called them back to see if they would ditch the person who just called and talk to me again….”
?!
How odd.
You know, some of us, when we grow up, actually have times when we are expecting an important call…one day, some of you might get a job like that too!
…and when that happens, and you are ‘chatting” on the phone, making small talk, hopefully your “friends” will not get too insulted to have to go on hold for a few minutes…
‘kay?
Now go have a nice soda…
“Oops I got a beep” isn’t the same as “sorry, I’m expecting an important call”, ‘kay?
If you insist on using such a patronizing tone, it would be more effective if you actually had something intelligent to say. Maybe you should scooter on home across the bridge and have a soda yourself…I have to go, I’m expecting a call.
Yeah, Miles, I do the same thing when my friends start to disappear into their keypads. Usually it’s something like:
“I’m behind you, watch out.”
I would have got up and left.
kay what?
I don’t subscribe to call waiting. If you call while I’m otherwise engaged you’ll leave a msg if you think I actually need to talk to you and 90% of the time… I don’t. I am, however, likely to check and see who it is… just in case I would rather dis you and talk to someone else. It happens sometimes, usually family… who also know how to leave a message.
Nobody cares what you think/do or how you talk on a phone, kay.
Visual call waiting is what I have.
yeah, that’s why no less than two bitches mentioned me in their posts. I know it’s tough to swallow ol’ buddy but you’re a big boy so suck it up
Mentioned you; doesn’t mean they ask you what you think. You’re dumb.
“kay?”
hmmmm… I wonder what THAT could mean. You’re such a wanker, Fat. Why not pick on an interesting controversial issue instead of me, eh? Even the bitches tire of the hijacking
Tsk tsk tsk.
You must stop playing the victim, kay. It makes you look unlady-like and is a sign of weakness.
I’m not playing a victim, Fat. I’m bitchin’. And I’m dam good at it too
You and your stupid semantics…
Totally playing a victim as usual.
‘kay? = Okay? not “Kay, c’mere a minute, we need your opinion.” Just to clarify. Sorry for the confusion 🙂
so am I
too funny! Sorry kay but that was priceless!
Oh that’s kay… I mean, that’s okay. *rolls eyes*
Wow… I can’t believe you actually mistakened that for your name. I thought it was pretty obvious that they were saying okay. Self centered much?
I have a ‘friend’ that acts in a similar manner. I do my best not to hang out with her anymore. Sometimes we are just better off alone.
that’s the one blanket comment that I can get behind. 🙂
now the crackberry one made earlier… not so much. the initial thrill of always being connected can be overwhelming but it’s those that can’t turn the fucking thing off for a few minutes that piss you off. I was over having the thing after a week and wouldn’t check it unless I knew something was going down at work.
I too have a friend like this. Only it’s not just dinner that they text and call people, it’s everywhere we go, anytime. We’ll be walking around or shopping or something and they’ll call someone or someone will call them and they will talk for like at least 10 minutes, many times longer, while I awkwardly just be there. One time, we were hanging out at my house, and it was getting late and I wanted to go to bed. I said this to them and they were on the way to my door when they decided to call someone and linger in the doorway while they talked for ten mins with me sitting there, pretending to sleep. WTF. And whenever they are driving, and I’m in the passenger seat, if they get a text, he passes me his phone and gets me to read the message and reply. Well, I don’t do this because I get easily car sick. So he’ll just text a bunch while driving…I ask them to stop texting while driving because I hate seeing my life flash before my eyes every 5 minutes. They aren’t the best attentive driver to begin with. They are a good friend of mine I’ve had for years though so I just put up with it. I do say something though, especially if we’re out to dinner or whatever, something not so confrontational like “don’t be one of those people” but it’s kinda said jokingly. Arrrrg how can someone do that!?
I find ALL telephones rude, period. I hate them. Two people in a room, one of whom having a conversation that the other person is not allowed to participate in. How anti-social.
I’m with Miles – cell phone on silent, to be used in case of emergency only. Texting is a phenomenon that is going to completely pass me by.
Haha, that’s priceless…”telephones on silent, for emergency only”
Up there with, guns unloaded, except in emergency…How you gonna hear that emergency call coming in there, Aristotle?
I expect the very first telegraphs were greeted with the same luddite sensibilities…Whhhyy, the north 40’s on fire Clem, maybe we oughtta telegraph down to Butte and let ’em know!
Unless, of course, you mean that the “emergency” will be originating at YOUR dinner table?
Whhhyy, this is the WORST ceasar sald I’ve ever had! Someone, please, call in the anchovies, for the love of God…
This forum cracks me up…Mind if I quote you?
Yeah, this forum cracks me up too. Mind if I quote YOU?
Yes, because common sense dictates that in case of emergency, phone… me. Or Miles.
My cell phone is for ME to use if I have an emergency. Likely such an emergency would not be related to supper. Strange that this requires clarification.
Please practice a little more before dragging your raggedy ass attempts at sarcasm in here. You’re really not very good at it at ALL, and it this forum, you are sadly outmatched and ouflanked.
I think the easy thing to do is:
1. Put it on vibrate if you can’t stand not having it.
2. If a call does come in, excuse yourself QUIETLY, and take it elsewhere.
3. In the case of a text, have some patience, and deal with it later.