This past Saturday I attended a screening of the 1982 film The Thing. I was really excited and just ecstatic to have the chance to see it in theatre—I was and am sure I won’t have the chance to see it again on the silver screen. Now my complaint isn’t about the cinema, or the quality of the film, oh no. My gripe has to do with the audience. To be more specific, the idiots who felt it was necessary and “funny” to talk throughout the entire film. You know who you are. You thought it was hilarious to quote lines from the film inanely right after they were being said on the screen. There is nothing as rude as talking and spoiling the film for the other viewers, who has paid hard-earned money to see a classic. Well I hope the next time you choose to attend a screening of a film, kindly shut your mouth. If not I really hope someone shuts it for you. —Frustrated Film Aficionado

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14 Comments

  1. I made a similar bitch a few weeks ago, but this is a bit different because it’s a re-screening and it’s bound to have it’s share of douche bag “movie lovers” shout out their favourite lines. In that case you should have talked with the theatre employees about it.

  2. i have attended retro theaters in toronto. eraserhead, rocky horror and the crowd was the entertainment. yes i remember your post fish. i am assuming there was a large group op or you could have called them on it

  3. we’ve been thru this too many times before o.p., JUST TELL THEM TO SHUT THE FUCK UP OR THEM TO LEAVE.

  4. So did you tell them to be quiet/get an usher, or did you sit there fuming like a passive aggressive little bitch?

  5. I was there and I agree with you. They were clearly not film lovers enjoying a good cult-y old flick, they were laughing loudly and talking about completely irrelevant things even during the quiet parts of the movie. I’m pretty sure they were also at The Fly…there were some drunk (smelling strongly of alcohol) girls in front of me laughing and chatting through the whole thing. At one point, the guys in front of them got up, told them off, and switched seats.

    In retrospect, yeah, it would have been better to get up and get an usher but at the time, it seemed like more of a pain in the ass to climb over strangers to get out of the crowded row and miss some of the movie…so I just tried to ignore them.

  6. NO ONE GIVES A FUCK. what the hell did you expect? you must be like a clone of this friend i have.
    hop on the Delorean, Mcfly and go back to when it came out. and watch it. you’ll have better luck with that, then finding people who actually give a shit.
    Go and Rent it.
    or learn how to tune shit out. (somthing that most people can do.) stop being so easily distracted. i mean if you love the movie SO MUCH NOTHING shouldve stood in your way, of movie bliss. you shouldve been all in your own little zone. but naaaaah, you had to look down at your nose and absorb yourself in picking out the faults of the unevolved cro magnons who didnt fanboy this movie you like. Man, no ones to blame here but yourself. dont Bitch about shit that couldve been easily dealt with. if you didnt even make an efort to confront the fucks as well, then i guess life sucks for you. 😛

  7. I can appreciate the OP not wanting to crawl over strangers to get an usher. I’d opt for public humiliation. It works wonders, especially if you can be clever and not use profanity while doing so.

  8. what I don’t appreciate is the fucking old bitties that do this.

    you’re over 50! you KNOW to SHUT THE FUCK UP…
    not TALK TO THE MOVIE!
    it’s a MOVIE… it’s not going to ANSWER you.

    couldn’t believe this. I can take kids doing it because I can fuck them up, but I’m not about to get physical with 56 year old book club wino’s hanging their tits on the seats in front of them.
    GAWD

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