I got your number from a mutual friend and I messaged you. You wrote back and we’ve been texting for the past two weeks, and exchanged several pictures. We still haven’t met up in-person yet! Your either working or busy with school, same 2 excuses. Five times I suggested a time and place for us to meet up, every time you have to work or do some big assignment/exam for school. Some times I start to think you don’t wanna meet me in the first place or we would of gone out already! It been 2 weeks FFS! But you insist you wanna meet up, you just won’t let me know when. Ok, I’m sure working and going to university keeps you busy, but I’m just as busy as you are! Come on, this stops now! We meet up this week or I’m thru with talking to you. Stop being a flake! —Enough Games, Princess
This article appears in Mar 29 – Apr 4, 2012.
Methinks the person in question is simply NOT interested. Would you like me to underline that?
Dense …like a fog bank !
I dunno…I was hooked up in a similar situation (mutual friend thought we’d hit it off, yadda), and it took two months to get three dates in due to our schedules.
However, if the guy had been pushing as your bitch makes it sound you might be, I’d have been a bit weirded out as well…
It is END OF TERM and there isn’t a free moment for most folks to take a shit let alone eat yours…….. chill, the Easter Bunny may provide a reprieve.
Ohhhhh OB, you have many things to learn about the dating world.
Quick rundown:
1. If he won’t meet you, he’s likely not interested enough OR he’s shy as fuck. If he’s not interested, move on. There’s nothing more pathetic than trying to get someone who clearly isn’t sold on you to be sold on you. If this is the case: move on. If it’s the latter and he’s too shy, well then you have to decide whether or not you want to be with someone who is so socially inept that it’s like pulling teeth to get him to do anything.
2. And if he’s on the level and really *is* that busy (which is doubtful — if a guy/gal is interested enough, they’ll make time), do you really want to be with someone who can’t or won’t make time for you?
3. As mentioned in number 1: you should never have to convince anyone of how wonderful you are. If they need convincing, than you can do better. You should be with someone who is smitten on their own. If they aren’t and need some arm pulling — than move on. You can do better and you deserve better.
4. Be prepared for the fact that someone “better” may have come along. It happens every day. You’ll be talking to a guy and then suddenly someone else who catches their eye comes along and they, for whatever reason, prefer them. If this happens and they stop communicating with you like they had been, than it’s time to move on. Why would you want to give any of your time to someone who has no time for you after they meet someone ‘better’? Do you really want to be a back up?
These are a few of the things I’ve learned over the years. Not so much learned, but realized were some dating values I possessed. I have too much respect for myself to beg or convince some schlep to be with me. If he doesn’t want to take the initiative than fuck it (not literally — actually the opposite).
Golden rule of dating: if it’s like pulling teeth for them to pay attention to you, than they’re just not that into you (yes, I used that cliche, but it works here, goddamnit).
If he really wanted to meet you, he would’ve by now.
tl:dr
point being I remember the stressful times of nearing the end of the semester…
but the simple fact is that you have to eat…. you HAVE to.
so there is always a 15 min snack break to meet up.
If they say they don’t have time for that… then you’ve no chance.
re-bait and cast off.
I’m also pretty sure this is a dude (or macho dudette) getting snubbed by a lady.
Wow, dude. You’re THIS pushy and clingy NOW, BEFORE you even make a face-to-face?? Even going so far as to make an ultimatum?
Ummmm, yeahhhhh. I can’t understand why she keeps brushing you off, either……….!!
Sweet Jesus, man. Desperate much?!
Heh, I like that word “smitten”
OMG, OP, chill the fuck out. It’s only been two weeks. Maybe she IS really busy and may only be able to meet you after she’s done school. Do you know how busy many students are at this time of the year? And working a job on top of that could make one booked solid, depending on how often they work and what courses they’re in. Judging by the fact that you say “would OF” instead of “would HAVE” and don’t know when to use “your” and “you’re”, you haven’t been in school for a while and have no clue of the work some teachers/profs load on their students.
But, like others have mentioned, maybe she’s not into you. Maybe she doesn’t find you attractive. Or maybe your pushiness is turning her off. Leave her alone for a bit. Wait another week or so and let the ball be in her court. If she doesn’t pick a time and a place to meet you by then, MOVE ON.
Oh and call her “Princess” with that same condescending tone one more time. That drives women WILD with desire.
Are these dirty pictures? Coz im sure hes just leading you on for thosee… just sayin
ugh.. I don’t even know where to begin. You’re doing it wrong OP. You are chasing this girl instead of trying to make yourself attractive and interesting. You don’t want to come off as too available/desperate. My advice is don’t contact her until she contacts you, don’t keep texting her or whatever begging for her attention, or pushing for a date. It is an extremely busy time of year for students, she might just want to wait to meet you until she actually has time and energy to focus on you without worrying about exams or studying or assignments. Or she’s not into you, either way it’s time to sit back and see if she bothers to contact you. Start pursuing another girl or 2, you guys haven’t even met FFS.
I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that you’re the type of person that can’t take a hint.
I had a situation KINDA similar to this a few months back, she was from out of town and going to school, so that made it challenging. The first time we were supposed to meet some signals got crossed and we didn’t end up meeting, it ended up being a huge waste of my time and gas, because she only had a little bit of free time available and by the time I figured out where she was it was too late.
I was gracious about it, because it was kind of my fault too, I thought I knew where her hotel was but I was WAY off. Anyways you can’t get frustrated, I really wanted to be like “thanks a lot for wasting my time bitch!” but I was gracious about it, and we ended up meeting up a couple weeks later. Patience is big OP. If you’re already pressuring her and guilting her into seeing you and you haven’t even met, how long before you’re trying to pressure her into having sex with you? That’s what I’d be thinking if I were her.
Chill out dude, and yeah, if you feel like she’s jerking you around, move on.
I agree with the ‘stop contacting her until she contacts you’ thing.
I learned that shit A LONG time ago.
In fact, I have two separate situations with people atm, that I’m THIS close to being fed up with that I’ve resorted to this tactic. Mainly because I have better things to do with my time than spend it caring about people who seemingly don’t have the time of day for me.
If you’re the one doing all the work, chances are they’re not interested in you for whatever reason.
I figure if they want to get a hold of me, they can. *shrug*
Just because you’re waiting for the main course doesn’t mean you can’t have an appetizer, if there is no mutual exclusivity on the table. That’s probably why she doesn’t have time for you.
sounds like you keep chasing her. you probably chased her away.
Would you like a frying pan with which to hit yourself in the head or did you want to give up already?
HARPER and Meaty. BAZINGA!
I agree, just break off communication. You might be pleasantly surprised.
yeah o.p., they will never meet you, same as some i can think of. better off going and jerking off. there will probly be just as much pleasure in it, and hey, way cheaper too. and you don’t have to listen to it bitch the next morning, right guys?
and by the way, why tell us, she is the one you wanna fuck, right???
The solution is obvious. She is going to university and doesn’t have time for idle chit chat. You must engage her at the philosophical level. Reflect on the nature of her mind. Where is she coming from? Is she a realist? An existentialist? An epistemological constructivist?
I’m going to go out on a limb and suggest slipping a little Sartre with a side-serving of Simone de Beauvoir into your next text as an initial gambit. See what happens. Good luck!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!