I’m tired of cleaning up all your mess! I realize you’re ‘busy with school’ and with that job but if you have enough time to sleep in until 2, you have enough time to clean your damn garbage up.
I do everything you do, and I still manage to find a way to keep this apartment in semi-clean order. I told you when you moved in that I’m not a clean freak, and yeah, I can get a little messy too. But you take it to the extreme. You bring out your crustyass week old dishes from your smelly cave and leave them on the counter for me to do—then you criticize how I wash dishes?! For a week I only washed the set of dishes I use… and we ran out of dishes! The counter and table were full of your moldy old food and plates, and sour milk… and you STILL didn’t do anything until I said something.
I’m not your mother. I have my own stuff to do. It’s to the point where if I want something done I have to tell you when to do it and when I need it done by. I do the majority of house chores… AND I STILL HAVE TO RIDE YOUR ASS FOR YOU TO GET IT DONE.
I can’t have people over because it takes one night of you being home for this place to explode with filth. On top of that you constantly criticize how I do things. DO YOUR PART! I’ve tried not doing anything, asking you to do your share, writing reminder notes, not saying anything, saying something, shoving all your shit from in the living space into your cave—nothing is working. —Mr. Nice Guy
This article appears in Mar 17-23, 2011.
http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-cant-st…
It’s hard living with roommates. I had one similar roommate. I ended up hiding a set of dishes so that I could have cleans ones to use.
At least your lease is probably soon up so you can just move to a bachelor apt or get a different roommate.
Which is why I live alone. The only one I can bitch about is me.
usy with school? and sleeping til 2, hmmm, someone is either bullshitting a bit, or they don’t know how to tell time. try again fool.
I had roommates years ago that were filthy too so I moved out.
I am also a student who works fulltime, and I can see this from the other side of the fence. Not that your roommate has an excuse – he doesn’t – but often times I get home from work with just enough time to study until the wee hours of the morning, and maybe catch 5-6 hours of sleep.
My roommate and I have started a list on the fridge that we write on every time someone does a chore. This is because I have so much going on in my head that I often forget that it’s been a week and a half since I took the garbage out, or since I did the dishes. Looking at the list allows me to see when she’s doing more housework than I am and forces me to re-prioritize (I’ve discovered that cleaning bathrooms is a good way to avoid writing papers!)
Oh, and don’t discount the trick of moving the mess/dishes to a spot where it inconveniences them. My old roommate once found her moldy spaghetti sauce pot in her bed instead of in the oven where she left it.
If the roomie is sleeping until 2, when are they going to bed, OP? When I was in school it wasn’t uncommon to be up until 4 or even 5am working on school crap. I’d get to bed and sleep for a few hours then get up and go to class for 3pm and have classes until 9pm. Or sometimes I’d be up until 3 or 4am, have to get up and go to work and then have a class until 9pm.
Student sleep schedules are usually pretty fucked up, but I can guarantee I get more sleep NOW that I’m working a 9-5er than I did when I was a student sleeping in till noon.
As Bro Tim said: Just live alone! If it is economic reasons forcing you to co-habitate, Scrubs has the right idea. I’d throw everything theirs in their room. It is incredible how fucking lazy humans are, and I was always surprised at how you never can tell until they move out how a person will be on their own.
OP, if you’re a student with limited funds, check out Kijiji for a dishwasher. Or move out and into a place that has a dishwasher included. That machines are a miracle.
Or, start hiding the dishes….take away a few each day. Eventually your roommate will ask what happened to them. Tell them some fat person ate them.
The owning-few-dishes-stratagy works from what I have heard.
Another one that works is making a habit of inviting over 1. people he would want to impress (“hotties”) that aren’t afraid to comment on his cleanliness, or 2. really really outspoken people that will give him a hard time.
Orr.. you could put everything dirty and his in his room every day, and vacuum in front of his room. That way his room will fill with bugs but the rest of your apartment should be fine (you may have to spray some raid in front of his room too, eventually). Bugs USUALLY cause people to clean.
Final options include kicking him out, taking money from him and using it to pay a maid service or the always popular calling of his mom 😉
Umm…why did you choose to live with someone who is in your eyes ‘messy’?
You should be living alone, or with someone who lives up to your standards.
Love the av Beatrix 🙂 your work?
I have a roommate exactly like yours. I was just about to submit a bitch on her when I saw your post!
i just read your link commander…excellent✔ shite written from a beastie’s pov is always a larf
WE love the Onion – got a stack of them on the turlet tank. On my way to the bus stop this morning I met one of the other tenants walking his Golden Lab pup, a fuzzy little live wire with big paws and floppy ears suffering from sensory overload and just going nuts at meeting a new person. Put a smile on my face from the get-go. That and the eagle news make this a good day.