You know that feeling when you get a 55% on a midterm exam in a Masters program and you just want to quit. And u clash with ur supervisor, and ur only doing good in 1 class, and you feel like you don’t fit in, cause your parents never went to univ, and the debt is crushing u slowly, all in the hopes of a better job. Feeling lost and hopeless. —Need some guidance
This article appears in Oct 22-28, 2015.
Sounds like you should fold up this losing card game and move on to the real world, meaning: get a job. You’re not doing yourself one bit of good staying in a program that is, obviously, too difficult for you to handle right now. Maybe you can pick it up later. In the meantime, cut your losses. Maybe you haven’t found your real calling yet.
My boyfriend went through the same thought process for his MBA program. He got a couple really bad grades and seriously considered dropping out of the program. However, at that point he was more than halfway through the program and had the ability to make up those marks in a summer class. If the course is something you love to do, but you’re struggling with a certain aspect of it (Economics for him); then ask for help! Professors.. classmates.. There are lots of ways to get help if you just swallow your pride and look for it.
University is a big achievement, and while it’s not for everyone (such as myself, but it was glaringly obvious as I passed one class.. with a D) it’s a serious choice to drop out and should’t be taken lightly and without thought. Don’t throw it away over one test and a bad day.
cut your losses get a job pay back what you can research quick programs that give good jobs at the end (looking at you trades) do one, spend 15 years paying off debt. Problem solved
I’ve been there, I definitely know how you feel. My advise to you is to say fuck it, you have nothing but money to lose, but if you already don’t have money like you say you don’t, then it doesn’t matter, you gotta keep going. You’re determination needs to keep you afloat and you need to just say fuck it and stay up that extra hour researching, go get an appointment to meet with your supervisor and ask that person to explain exactly how you could’ve raised that grade and if there is anything that you can do to make up for it. Reach out to anyone that you can and you say fuck it, get your head out of your ass and light that fire again. Don’t give up now, just get back in the fight, you’re almost there- you fucking got this! (please excuse the horrible grammar lol)
I think I know why you got a 55% on your midterm and you’re lucky you got that. Your professor probably hurt his or her eyes just trying to decipher what you wrote.
Hard to tell from so few details but maybe you are in the wrong program. Can you switch to one that better matches your aptitudes and interests? You would probably be more engaged and feel more competent. You might even want to look at some community college programs if money is an issue.
The bottom line is that you will likely be spending a long time in the workforce. I wouldn’t make potential salary my number one criteria. If you can find a field that’s suits your strengths, and that you enjoy doing most days, you will be among the lucky ones who chose the right profession.
Firstly, allow all things to be As They Are(it’s insane not to!). ACCEPT what’s happening so there’s no emotional negativity and THEN decide if you want to:
A) Remain in the situation
B) Walk away
C) Take action
If you need to talk to someone, I’d be happy to chat with you (I don’t know how to facilitate this online without getting crap from all the commenters on here). Also grad student, have been where you are.
Remember this:
– all grad students feel like they’re no good at what they do at some point in their program. Maybe they feel like impostors right from the get go. Maybe it hits them halfway through and lasts for the rest of their time. We never admit this to each other, but I promise you from the bottom of my heart that _every single grad student_ has felt the same way you do — lost and hopeless.
– it’s okay to switch supervisors. If you can facilitate it, if you can get some advice from other faculty… do it. absolutely do it. Clashing with your supervisor is one of the hardest things to get through.
– it’s not about the grades. Look, there comes a point where the bottom line is simply that you got into your program, so you’ve already passed the bar, and you just need to pass your courses. Real life is not graded on a B- = fail scale.
– accept and acknowledge that you’re struggling, if you are, and give yourself permission to ask for help — whether that takes the form of talking to your profs, or your classmates, or the writing centre, or whatever. Be kind to yourself. Don’t blame yourself, don’t beat yourself up, but treat yourself with kindness and acknowledge that what you are doing is HARD.
– you may always ‘just want to quit’. The question is, are you willing to be uncertain about how you feel right now in hopes of the better job, as you say? You’re never going to feel sure about where you’re at or where you’re going, but if you quit, you stop, you’re not moving, you’re stuck in between. But if you stay in, you’re moving forward even if you’re not sure where you’re going. You’re going somewhere. On the other hand, if you absolutely know that this is not what you want to do with your life, then walk away from it with no regrets. Consider the money and time you already spent an investment in your life, because you learned definitively what you don’t want to do.
Also… be proud of yourself, original poster. I am impressed by what you wrote. Your parents never went to university — but you are in grad school. You’re studying *in spite of* the crushing weight of debt. You have big dreams, you are aiming for a better job. Be proud of yourself. Don’t be afraid of asking for help.
I wrote it lol. thanks for the advice, i will quit. its tooooo hard 🙁
hi pooka can we just email? i need someone to talk to. i don’t want to make a mistake, but your right, i feel like i don’t measure up for the program and, making me want to quit.
I think you can do it baby.doll. Grind it out.
You’re trying to get a Master’s with grammar skills like that?!
Money down the toilet my friend.
hi baby.doll, sure. send an email to sauropteryx at hotmail.com .