To the lady who always comes into my store and talks for at least 15 minutes about the following: your divorce, your latest flings, your insecurities, the good day you had yesterday, the awful day you’ve been having today… NONE OF US CARE!
I’m all for small talk, but when it gets to the point where I literally feel like I have enough information about your life to write your biography, it’s a bit much. You’re a young (ish) lady, I’m sure you must have some friends (unless you’ve talked them all away) or maybe even a therapist that you can speak to about these things.
Sure, let’s discuss the weather. Or you know what, lets spoil each other and talk about the awesome movie we just saw. But please, please please don’t tell me about your love life (or lack thereof) because it’s getting to be a bit much. And customers are noticing too, it’s awkward. —Sore ear
This article appears in Sep 2-8, 2010.
The worst is when you’re in line stuck behind some old hag who spends ten minutes putting her stuff on the conveyor belt thing and another ten minutes talking about what her cat did today, then you get caught behind them trying to very, very, very slowly pull out of the parking lot in their giant car and AAAHHHHH!
Old people, I respect you, understand that you’re old, and even think you can be very cute sometimes (wink wink), but GOD you fucking piss me off sometimes!
By saying big car you deffinately mean their Buick. Nine times out of then.
As an old fucker myself I share your pain. Sobeys were doing a survey at the Queen St store and I was asked for my opinion – I told them they should have an old gimmers aisle (the seniors home is just a 2 diaper walk from the store) that is equipped with a steel plate in the floor and when the gimmer prattles on a jolt of electricity goes through the plate and fries the old twats. Teeth get melted, pacemaker flips out, only drawback is exploding colostomy bag!!
Mom… I told you to stop yammering to the employees in the stores. You’re gonna get yourself banned from the store and I am not shopping for you! No fucking wonder I’m nasty!
Chortle Mr Mc
Thanks HP…
So, is that what you say to your friends when bungee jumping or on the edge of a cliff… Hugo Phurst?
I gotta go talk to my mother again. She better not make me get the hose!