Resolution = Lose weight. Two the two manatees at the gym on the treadmills, if you think walking the pace you’re going will do anything for your cellulite-based ass, you’re wrong. You need to move a lot faster. If you went at the same pace as your yapping mouths, you’d have more success. This is a busy time of year at the gym, so lots of people are waiting to use machines. Listening to you two chatter back and forth continuously about how you don’t want to sweat because it might stain your new yoga pants or how hungry you are makes me roll my eyes. Why are you even here? You want to lose weight, but you don’t want to sweat and all you talk about is food. Get back on the sofa that you plopped off of and let the rest of us health-conscious people exercise. At least I can count on you eventually quitting the gym once the resolution slithers from your brain. —10K Runner
This article appears in Jan 12-18, 2012.
FAWK, I hate people who go to the gym with “a friend” …. omfg, if you cannot have a fitness routine on your own then stay the hell home!
1) Learn the difference between “Two” and “Too”
2) Sign up for the Kandahar to Kabul marathon. Wear your I♥Danish Cartoonists t-shirt.
3)Leave the Manatees alone ya cunt.
You are one snarky twat, OP – were the cascading rolls too offensive for your tender eyes or what? These people are, at least, attempting to do something about their weight – I wish to fuck your eyes would roll to the back of your stupid head and stay there, asshole.
You gotta crawl before you can walk or run, and ever hear of LSD training? Duh. You claim to go to a gym and yet the concept of base training or getting used to equipment or an exercise routine is foreign to you?
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LSD training
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Mormons?
Wpaul
Exercise is all about motivation…..
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/8933/to…
wow, thomas has lovely gams
It must suck to be fat, you get called lazy whether you exercise or not I guess…here’s an idea, if they’re taking up your precious machines why don’t YOU go out and jog instead of whining about people using the gym membership they also paid for.
hmm, a braggart who hates fat people…sebastard?
Cranky’s right.
Thing *is* if you’re inactive and out of shape (and overweight to boot), you don’t have to do a lot of activity to get your heart rate up. It’s all about heart rate — if they went as fast as you can apparently go (because OMG you’re like, a gym god!) they’d likely go above their max heart rate (which could mean keeling over). They’re probably staying in a perfectly acceptable heart rate zone for fat loss.
As for the chatter — if you don’t like it, get yourself an ipod and tune it out like the rest of us. As long as they aren’t just standing/ on the equipment doing nothing but socializing, leave ’em the hell alone. At least they’re making an effort and having a gym buddy CAN help to stay motivated.
And as a bonus, they’ll probably stop going to the gym and be back to eating two whole pies a day by mid Feb.
I always tend to think that the really big people you see exercising in public are effing brave. I mean it must take a lot of nerve to get out and do something in a place full of people more fit than you, or just anywhere that someone’s going to see your wobbly bits wobble. Never mind if, on top of *that*, you have the fitness police judging you for trying to make your health/life better.
Assholes like the OP reinforce my opinion.
oooh—so sorry these chubbettes offend your eyes!
Grab some freeweights and do some reps in front of these heifers so that they have an example of taut, fit lean Canadian womanhood right in front of they fat eyes.
That outta shame those bitches. They’ve got some cheek hogging up the machines in your gym, sweatin’ that fat girl sweat all up in you atmosphere!
so xeno, you think this is a woman?
OB, God forbid those fat, obese blobs sweat…..because when they do, they leave the machines and everything else they touch soaking wet. But you’re right OB, they’ll eventually quit going…..those fat people always do. Then you won’t have to see their cottage cheese thighs for another 11 months.
OB, I know the type of people you’re talking about and despite the “holier than thou” attitude of many of the comments here, you have hit the nail right on the head.
These type of people flood the gyms in the new year, expecting that in a few short weeks, they will go from flab to fab…with as little exertion as humanly possible…and by mid-February, when the results don’t magically materialize, then they bail like rat deserting a sinking ship.
It’s the typical mentality of a society that expects everything in an instant.
Take comfort in the fact that they won’t be around much longer.
Yeah, the gyms are probably flooded every near year, and thankfully, some of them stick with it despite assholes here there and everywhere. Props to the ones that do.
Hooligan= poorly done troll a la Sebastian/ poor imitation.
Wp
Some may expect instant results, but even a monkey knows that when you’re fat and out of shape, it takes a lot less to exert yourself than if you’re not fat and are in shape.
Believe it or not, these fatties on the treadmill going 2.5-3-3.5 are probably actually burning just as many calories than someone in shape jogging. And over exerting yourself (remember those out of shape would be over exerting themselves if they really pushed it and jogged, for example) can do more harm than good.
That’s right, anyone (fat, skinny, or in between) who hasn’t worked out in a long time should go at it full tilt right from the start. Not only are you an idiot but a Self-Entitled Twat.
Oh man, I just noticed that the OB signed this “10K Runner”. Wow, douche?
Whats your PB? Go on, don’t be shy.
Hey Bitch.
Some people can’t run. They have weak knees. Or bad ankles. As a person with shot out knees (that got that way from doing more hardcore training than YOU’LL ever do in your life, btw) i CANNOT run. So i walk. I am not overweight, in fact, i’m underweight. So does that qualify me for a spot in your retarded hemisphere of pretension and stupidity?
Some people go to the gym for physiotherapy, or for the exercise they’re able to do. Do you pay more than they do to use those machines? Probably not. So i guess you’re fuck out of luck, aren’t you, you stupid turd.
Fuck sake.. idiots should be seen and not heard. You just keep jumping up and down and giggling like the turd you are and don’t talk as much, mmkay?
Yeah, Painey, I do think it’s a woman, and the tag 10k runner is what gave it away, imo. What guy would brag about 10k?
I jogged for over two decades and all I got for my trouble was two totally fucked up knees due to ‘wear and tear’.
I’m currently on the Alexander Keiths 24 case/hour marathon weight loss regime, the sweat really flies when you twist that cap. The dress code is strict, fat pants and a T shirt capable of handling the orange gook that they will insist on coating Cheezies with. Local pizza joint is on speed dial and I’m on first name basis with the delivery guy.
This is why I don’t really feel comfortable going to a gym.. there are so many judgeMENTAL people out there that kick back in their spandex and stare at everyone, eavesdrop and probably text their friends about who’s there while they sit on their ass and wait for a machine!
As per usual, most of the comments here have just missed the OB’s point entirely.
Who goes to the gym and bitches about sweating?
If you’re not there to sweat, then what the hell are you there for?
It must be to show of the $1,000 worth of LuLuLemon clothing that you purchased before you bought your $400/year membership to the gym.
You have to apply yourself SOMEWHAT moderately if you want any kind of results.
http://www.cracked.com/article_19186_the-5… Can you tell I love this site? đŸ˜›
Hooligan, agreed. Unless someone is out jogging for the scenery (unlikely inside a gym), then they should pick up the pace. I suffered some pretty serious leg damage from training for distance running, so I’m sensitive to that fact with some people.
I’ve been outside walking down the sidewalk behind a pair of runners that couldn’t outpace me. They were running, I was walking… I must have trailed them for at least 8 blocks before our routes split. How can you think you’re making strides with your workout regime if you’re still moving at the same speed? Put some effort in, sweat a little bit. Each person has to find their own limit and push themselves to it as often as possible, being careful not to over work themselves of course.
OB … I’m assuming you attend a gym that will accept anyone as a member if they pay the fee. If that’s the case you’re gonna get all kinds with varying workout ethic. You come across as a fitness snob. You can’t control everyone’s workout and if it bothers you that much … open your own gym and restrict the clientele to those that meet with your approval … or setup a personal gym … then you’ll never have to deal with the ‘hogs that don’t jog’.
Excellent plan Baz. Work in some luke-warm yogic horizontal stretches on the couch and a regimen of forearm curls with the channel changer to prevent varicosity of the veins.
“Two the two manatees at the gym”…
and stopped reading.
they may be fat, but you’re stupid…
and at least they’re TRYING to lose weight….
Never stop loving that site, Agent-195. Always a suck-ass-day-picker-upper.
You burn more fat at lower intensity (walking, maybe with an incline) than you do at higher intensity (cardio training with a higher heart rate). So…they are actually doing what is recommended to achieve their personal fitness goals and for their level of fitness. As they progress and become condescending 10 km runners (like you) they will probably have new fitness goals.
Also, quit being a jerk. Is it your personal gym? I suspect not. Maybe the reason they are joking about food and sweat is because they are trying to be self-deprecating in an environment that is often hostile towards people who are overweight. (Your post is a good example of this).
I wonder if OB puts make up on and does her hair up to work out at the gym?
Great post, Upper Canadian.
My thoughts EXACTLY.
HOWEVER, you have to learn how to not give a shit about who’s at the gym. I’m overweight and I still go to the gym. I wear tank tops and lulus (though I buy ones that fit and I don’t sport a camel toe) and sweat my ass off and I don’t give two shits who sees me or who’s judging. It’s never bugged me, to be honest.
It’s actually the place I feel least self conscious, to be honest. I just turn my ipod on and do my thing and to fucking hell with what others think. I even change without going into a dressing room when I’m in the locker room — including changing out of my regular bra into my sports bra. In full view of others in the locker room and I really don’t give two shits what people think about how I look (though, it does help that I have nice tits).
I really wish I could feel like that in other aspects of my life. *lesigh*
i saw a program that featured pregnant women, they put on make-up every night, before they went to bed. they were due to give birth and wanted to look good^^
The ability to run 10K does not make you an elite athlete, OP. Get over yourself and learn to share.
“I even change without going into a dressing room when I’m in the locker room — including changing out of my regular bra into my sports bra. In full view of others in the locker room and I really don’t give two shits what people think about how I look (though, it does help that I have nice tits). ” …If anyone needs me me, you know where I’ll be. đŸ˜›
Just make sure you bring tissues, Agent 195. They’re THAT spectacular.
/shameless flirt
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
*le giggity* đŸ˜›
*whimper*
10 k runner, indeed. i couldn’t run 1, even if the hounds of hell were after me. might make it to the half mark, but only if wheeliep, gave me a tow.
fucking running dude, is not the end all to your life. it might kill you quicker than my smokes will kill me. a nice massive heart attack will do that to you.
i once knew a guy, really active, you name it, he did it. died of a heart attack at 36, reason, too much activity on his body. doctor said that if he walked instead of running and stupid jogging, he might have made 90 or more. do you folks see me running or any shit like that? nope, and you won’t, i hunt and fish, and fuck, every so often. and i am quite fit, and feel good about myself. i am not the man i used to be, but none of us ever will be again, we all age, get it, we all age. and with aging, we lose a lot of shit, and no ammount of any exercise, will bring it back. don’t fall for the bullshit you are hearing and seeing in those t.v. ads. you are aging, and sometime, you will all die, just like i will.
10 K runner. No big deal guys. I’m dating Tony the Tiger. No big deal.
Upper Canadian…. I’d love to see where you cited that info from.
here’s mine…
http://whatscookingamerica.net/HealthBeaut…
and the obvious fact that you burn the same amount of calories per distance traveled.
If I walk 5km one day and run 5km (not likely to ever happen but still) the next day… in those 5km, I’ve burned the exact same amount of calories. Makes sense… since I hauled my ass the exact same distance and still weigh roughly the same.
Difference only being TIME taken… so yes, they could walk and get the same workout…
the problem is that it’s going to take a shit-ton LONGER to do it.
I’d rather keep the heart rate up, get shit done, and get the fuck outta there…
than spend 3 hours in the gym lolly-gagging around and pissing everyone else off for being so slow or hogging machines for 25 minutes at a time.
On the subject of weight loss; I see where Mayor Ford has challenged other Mayors to join him in dieting, let’s hope the Bedfordite joins in and the scrawny arsed, chinless weasel will be invisible when he turns sideways to show 1 of his 2 faces at the camera.
Ford’s got a quick & easy way of ridding the world of 300 unsightly pounds. He calls out the S.W.A.T. team on Mary Walsh.
Dawn of the Zed. I got that information from the display on the treadmill and from the personal trainers at the gym. And 25 minutes on a treadmill isn’t “hogging” it, it is “using” it. I don’t give a hoot what you have to do during your day–you’re pissed that you can’t get on the treadmill? Go run outside, it is free after all.
Regardless of how many calories YOU can burn, the point is that the ideal workout depends on your personal fitness plan and how much shit you can get into by going too hard, too fast. People start walking on a treadmill so that they don’t have a heart attack, blow out their knees, destroy their back and so on.
OP you a very ignorant individual with no compassion for others. Everyone else already covered all the other obvious concerns with your character so that is really all I need to say.
10K runner huh? You think anyone gives a fuck? uhm…nope! You’re a pretentious asshole. You have no more right to be there than anyone else.
It takes a lot for an overweight person to go to the gym, and maybe more of them would stick with it with a little support and encouragement. A simple “keep up the good work” can go a lot further than rolling your eyes and humiliating a person. Pull your head out of your own ass bitch!
^^^ here here, johnsgirl! <3
You don’t have to run like the wind until your knees buckle to lose weight. So many runners have to wear those knee brace thingies. Because they go so buck wild on stuff. Atleast they’re getting out there and exercising…People are always bitching that fat people never get off the couch, well when they do you fucking bitch about it…Sheesh, you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. If you don’t like to hear talking, but on some headphone and don’t be such a rude entitled asshole. You’re not the only person in the world. And when it comes to exercise, every little bit counts!
Hit the nail on the head no_fool. So many people complain about those that are overweight or make fun of them. These two are trying make changes in their lives. Changes for the positive. I know a couple of ladies who go to the gym with each other because it adds motivation to go, they don’t want to let the other down. If it works for them, great. If these women (in the bitch) have a negative body image, going together might make it a little less intimidating.
As for talking being hungry or sweating on the yoga pants, they may have been joking, though OP probably doesn’t have a sense of humour.
chill out OP..why do you care
“People are always bitching that fat people never get off the couch, well when they do you fucking bitch about it”
Yup, you got it, No Fool!
Assholes.
Just remember, guys, cellulite can happen to the skinny too! <3
Seems like most of the issue has been covered, so I won’t add to the “they’re trying” line.
What I get an ironc laugh from, are the people who drive half an hour to get to the Gym, for a 20 minute workout.
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Not a “hog”, but it looks like he’s playing “this little piggy” or maybe the Wuxi Finger Hold really does work đŸ™‚
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rOWkAY9x4T8/Tv3H…
RUNNING FOR GLORY: THE MASOCHISTIC JOGGER
41. “It is a sign of a dull mind to dwell upon the cares of the body, to prolong exercise, eating, drinking, and other bodily functions. These things must be done by the way; all your attention must be given to the mind.”
Epictetus – “The Manual”
How do you view your body? Normally, except for illness or disease, one doesn’t “view” it at all. It is not an object of explicit conscious awareness. It is necessary, of course, since it is that by which we interact wih the world, but it is tacit, in the background, the instrument of our mind which does not make excessive demands upon it. However, there are pathologies related to how one views one’s body. The first is that of the gross sensualist.
For the sensualist – a narcissist, a satyr, a nymphomaniac or a glutton – the mind has ceased to exist, having been subsumed into the body as an instrument of its pleasure. For the sensualist, the the body predominates to the exclusion of the mind. The sensory pleasures exercise total control. To speak of the “reflective glutton,” for example, is to truly utter an oxymoron.
For the masochist – the jogger or his counterpart, the gymnasium fanatic – things are different. For the masochist there exists a schizophrenic relationship between body and mind. The body is seen something to be tamed, something to be conquered by the mind. It must be subdued in order that the masochist can be freed from its inevitable decay and death. For the jogger his angony is to be endured for salvation of his mind, his being. In other words, the jogger jogs for personal immortalty, he runs for glory which, of course, he simultaneously and sadly realizes he will never achieve.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
I have just gone beyond the 4.4mph fast walk that I used to do, and have graduated to the 6.5 mph “jog” on the treadmill – it took a while to trust my balance on the thing but I found my sweet spot.
Then again my treadmill is at home not in some shit-hole gym. I hate those places! This bitch is a perfect example as to why I hate them – it’s all about the “people” there
that lion will only let you touch his back paws, the front ones are off limits
Dartmouthy — I know what you mean about the balance on treadmills. I had an accident on one and bent my tail bone. It can’t be fixed. It doesn’t hurt anymore, and thankfully it didn’t crack (it was on the verge of doing so), but it was hard getting back into it. I couldn’t do the bike because it took about two months to heal and the eliptical makes me go into a blind rage, so I had to attempt to get over it quickly.
You gotta be careful with those things.
Dartmouthy, I can give you a workout where you won’t need the gym OR your treadmill!
PK- Zumba is the way to go… so much fun!!
Wow Dartmouthy, THERE’S an offer you don’t hear everyday! lol Hubba Hubba
Wow-is it just me, or is it getting hot in here? ☺
interesting factoid: When I was a marketing communications exec, one of my clients (home gym/spa) said bluntly: “the only people who go to gyms are people who want to get laid. Married people work out at home”
I hope that anyone who says OP should run outside would do the same. The roads are pretty bad, especially with running shoes on. I wouldn’t run out there.
That’s interesting about running the same distance burns the same amount of calories no matter how fast you go.
195’s article made me want to just grab a tub of Rolo ice cream and start watching soap operas.
I’m trying to cut weight right now, I had been trying to put on a bit of size for a while. According to some experts, a good practice is getting a 10 minute warm up, some weight training and then another 20 minutes of cardio, even if it’s just walking uphill on the treadmill for 20 minutes. I tried it for the first time on Monday, it’s hard but I don’t miss the soreness from lifting heavy weights. 6 more months to go.
Donairius – what a HORRIBLE thing to say. Wow. I think you are a very evil person. You remind me of that crazy lady that ran that baptist church and pickets gay funerals and does hate crimes. Why don’t you join her cult. Who was it that was all like “Donairius” is my best friend. It was one of the regular bitchers. That is REALLY NOT something to be proud about. He sounds like a redneck homophobe fuckin Tool-bar.