What is it with people and their stupid sarcastic smart ass comments. No, I don’t mean people. I mean YOU. Whenever I make a lightly negative comment about anything, and I mean ANYTHING such as “brr it’s cold” or “omg lattes are expensive these days” or “gah I’m so busy” you have to turn this into some extravagant big ordeal. The thing is, that they really aren’t complaints, they’re just little white comments I make to fulfill the awkward emptiness we now have between us.
So today I said I might start drinking Tims instead of trying to be a pretend little fake with my custom made lattes. Because frankly I can’t afford 7 dollar drinks 3 times a day. So you tell me to don’t be a little bitch and don’t settle for Timmys because it’s gross.
But guess what 1) coffee is coffee 2) I actually quite like Timmy and their newest selection of flavored drinks at $2 vs. my normal $7 and 3) unless you’re buying all my coffees from now on, I’m pretty sure you have no say in what I can and can’t drink.
And it’s not the fact of what you said, but HOW you said it. WTF… what did I ever do to YOU to make you have so much hostility toward me?
So then you’re next smart comment is “don’t you know how to make coffee?” I do, but I live 2 hours away from campus, and I’m at school from 8 in the morning to 10 at night. (I’m a science student, I hate to do the whole university vs art school comparison but heck, I’m going to. I count brain cells for a living, you take pictures of people). So I’m sorry?!! That I don’t have the fortunate pleasure of running home between classes to refill my coffee cup and I’m sorry?!! that I can’t carry my latte maker with me when I go to school.
So I’m sorry I ever said anything. Do me a favour, take your smart ass bitchy comments elsewhere. It’s not appreciated it. —I’m a Timmy’s Lover Now, Sue Me
This article appears in Jan 19-25, 2012.
Oh the irony …
I want to agree with you… but Tim’s coffee does suck.
Tim’s coffee suck’s a high hsrd one, and not in a pleasurable way.
Worst. Coffee. Ever.
Wpaul
Coffee is gross and makes your breath stink. Sue ME!
Tim’s coffee make my stomach gurgle and I get this sour feeling in the pit of my tummy.
Even their ice capps, which are quite tasty.
I used to hate coffee until a few years ago and now I don’t mind a cup of some flavoured coffee in the morning in the CAR on the way to work, or a latte here or there. I found cinnamon roll coffee k cups this weekend! Delicious without the carbs of an actual cinnamon bun. A diabetic’s dream 😛
I’ve become more of a tea drinker, though. I’m picky about my tea, however, and have been sticking to my tazo passion tea. It’s like hot juice without the carbs. 🙂
PS: are you still sad/mad/pissed off, Thomas? Anything I can do to help cheer you up?
I finally did try some Tim Horton’s coffee for the first time this weekend and OMG there is no amount of money I ever want to pay for that shit. PS Starbucks COFFEE isn’t expensive, it’s their lovely fancy drinks that are. Starbucks has a much more flavourful, bold coffee which I love and if you’re not a PUSSY, you’ll love it too. Actually, I guess they did come out with a new pussy version of their coffee called “blonde” or something.
I’m sorry mel, but starbucks coffee (straight coffee) is….. horrifyingly awful.
It’s so bitter. Even their breakfast blend is omg horrid.
I’d drink tims over starsucks coffee any day.
PS: second cup has the best coffee ever.
They don’t call it Staryucks for nothing. The worst bilge water ever. Mel, it’s not expensive? Surely you jest. Gross and expensive is an understatement.
Actually, I recently went on a journey to discover the best cup of coffee in Halifax.
For a tasty mug of the black stuff, go to the Backpackers cafe on Gottigen St. So Delicious!
Tim’s seems to depend where you buy it. Ferry Terminal and out home, A-OK. A cup from the one in Fall River makes me want to yark within five minutes.
OB, coffee as a drink is black.
Anything else is a COFFEE FLAVORED drink.
If you have to put fat (milk/cream or other nondairy stuff) in it along with a couple of scoops of sugar honey etc. to make it drinkable you are not drinking just coffee. How can you get confused by that ?
There are wonderful coffee’s that you can drink black & they taste the way coffee smells… too many people don’t know the difference so burnt garbage coffee beans that would normally be unfit are made palatable by additives & ‘special flavors’ like hazelnut vanilla & making triple doubles, mocha, extra foamy lattes ….with cinamon & sprinkles (fuck who came up with sprinkles ? a 4 year old child ?) not that I’m judging you people who prefer that stuff.
Just please don’t call it coffee ! That drink comes out of the pot, is dark black & delicious no additives required.
Uh oh, I can see North End Halifax organizing a protest now because the OB said ‘white comments’ and not ‘black comments.’
You are all degenerate fucking drug addicts! haha
Timothy’s Donut Blend K cup…
and only because it’s free.
if you want caffeine, just pop half a wake-up and save yourself the ghastly flavor.
Pretentious coffee connoisseurs don’t get to waste my time…
For this bitch only, I love More. Oh lawd. Also coffee is supposed to be bitter.. that’s the coffee you’re tasting ;D. A non-ridiculous sized cup of coffee at SB is about 2-3 bucks, none of this crazy $7 nonsense. Have you tried coffee made in a Keurig More?
Tim’s coffee, Keith’s beer, Type O blood. You don’t have to like it – it just has to get the job done.
Just got a GRANDE dark roast coffee and a lemon poppyseed loaf which came to $5.06, suck it. I found out I don’t have to work tomorrow so I decided to get a little crazy with a TWO DOLLAR GRANDE ;D
I like coffee when it has a nutty essence.
My favorite k cups are the ones in the donut shop line. Fucking awesome. Also if you want to brew starsux at home just get one of those my k cups. I brew second cup and loose tea in there.
I just remembered another reason I don’t like Tim’s.. it smells like fart. I don’t know how I could forget that, I get to smell it every day in my workplace.
@ Depeche Mel…. I do not believe I have ever had coffee made in a machine like that. But I have had coffee from commercial style espresso/capachino machines. You know the ones where the beans are in a hopper & you fresh grind them, then decide if its going to be a black coffee or make an esspresso,or cap …what ever you like.
The best coffee I have ever tried was columbian, while in Columbia, Presidente Gold Seal not for export ,it smelled devine & tasted just like its wonderful scent.
Do you work at a Tim’s Mel? Or a proctologist’s office? Zing.
Fuckin A , Number One avatar there FS. Phat is da man! Me Old Dad is rocking that very T-shirt in Kingston , Ont. Spreading the word.
No, I work in an office which means most people there smoke which means they drink Tim’s. Tim’s + cigarettes seem to be a popular combo.
If we had a Denny’s here – THAT would be their Grand Slam Breakfast >: (
Thanks Ivan! Phat is indeed tha man. Coffee and cigarettes are the least kissable breath combo out there. The least anythingable combo, really.
mmmm Tim’s + double blast of fat + 2 x’s sugar + nicotine & Tar & another 4000 chemicals….
http://www.quitsmokingsupport.com/whatsini…
excuse me I gotta go be sick !
feels like something I’ve never eaten, is trying to come back up ! !
I love Tims but it’s too expensive to buy regularly. I do like the K-cups and they make a fine substitute.Especially when you can get those deals where one can 24 for $15.99 mix and match. You can buy 24 different flavours, it’s fun.
I don’t like coffee (too bitter) and I don’t like cream (too rich) but I do love them together with brown sugar. It’s a heavenly drink. Good thing I burn 500 calories a day at the gym though.
Timmy’s = gut rot
Damn deep fried coffee beans.
That depends PK, you still up?
Giggity
Huh?
Am I missing something here?
Either Thomas was drunk and/or on drugz last night, or he was attempting to booty call my ass AND/OR both.
And i’m pretty sure i’m ok with the last two options. *WINK*
AHAHAHA.
No seriously, I *was* up late last night. And my ass is going to suffer for it today, so I need stimulating conversation both on here and on other forms of electronic communication to keep me up. I’m counting on you guys and my friends off LTWWB to come through on this, because if I go for a nap at work today (hey, lotsa people nap at where I work, don’t hate), I won’t be able to get up and asking your assistant to wake your ass up is kind of unprofessional).