Ok, it’s enough that everyone in the house/flats can hear your regular drunken tirades. We especially love it when you decide to walk around the house and rant at your partner who remains inside!!! We all love to hear about your dead daughter, not being cold, but we don’t know you and don’t want all the details of your fucked up life every time you get drunk enough to want to share this stuff, with total strangers. And I don’t care to know that your partner is a pedophile!!! WTF is wrong with you??? Are you so batshit crazy that you think people want to know this shit? That makes me feel great with a grand daughter that I wish to come visit. And I know it’s none of my business, but why would some one live with a known pedophile?

So now it’s going to be an issue with a car that hasn’t been in the tiny parking lot, that you say you’ve had for the last 2 years! You really are one messed up individual, I would know if a car was parked right behind me, under the no parking sign I might add, for 2 years. The best is yet to come, because going to do laundry today, I find burned into the carpet in the hallway, one of your cigarette butts. So on top of all the other chaos that you love to spread, now I have to think about your sorry drunken ass burning the building down!!!
The most polite thing I could possibly say is please move the fuck away! —Totally Fed Up Upstairs

This article appears in Nov 24-30, 2011.

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17 Comments

  1. Are you so batshit crazy that you think people want to know this shit?

    No.. it’s because you’re not the center of his/her thought processes.

    Obviously there’s an issue and you can’t live with a neighbour like this. I understand your frustration with this person who’s life is clearly in a terrible place. So instead of bitching about this person’s chronic and terrible suffering and how much of an inconvenience it is to you i suggest you either call the landlord, call the cops or call a moving company and go somewhere else if the first two options don’t work.

    Seriously.

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  2. on top of that, I’d record at least one or two rant sessions beforehand so I had a taste of the auditory hell you’re faced with.

    oh, and go buy a fire extinguisher… ASAP.

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  3. Ahhh the joys of living with the mentally ill! This person either has serious mental problems, or is a compulsive liar. Either way, I’d get out of there ASAP. Talk to your landlord and if he/she doesn’t want to kick out the other person, I’m sure they wouldn’t be able to penalize you for breaking the lease. If you think there is a pedophile in your building, I think you can contact the police and they have access to sex offender records I believe. Don’t bring your granddaughter over there regardless, these tools sound terrifying.

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  4. OB, that’s what you get for living in apartments. Get on MLS and buy a house like normal people do. Then you won’t find strange cars parked in your driveway, you won’t have people thumping around drunk above you, no pedophiles in the house, and no burn marks in the carpet (although no one has carpet anymore). It’s a buyer’s market, now get out there and buy.

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  5. Dear god.. this is one of those situations where you wish you had a gun but thank god that you don’t at the same time.

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  6. Have you actually done anything about it other than bitch on here? Seriously, call the fucking landlord and/or cops.

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  7. That sounds dangerous, I’d think about moving and I definitely wouldn’t want to bring kids around. People can do outrageous things when drunk, luckily for me the worst I had to endure was the guy who used to get loaded and sing Laura Branigan’s ‘Gloria’ over and over.

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  8. It’s time you packed up and moved. I remember an apartment I lived in next door to a hardened alcoholic, we heard thumping and moaning in the hallway one night, looked out the door to see drunkie laying on the floor smoking and trying to insert his key into the bottom of the door. Not cool, not safe, and we moved at the end of the month.

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  9. Hi OB.
    You have made my day.
    My memory of living in an apartment is getting pretty damn foggy. But your bitch has reminded me of exactly why I don’t live like that any more .
    Thank you
    I Hope you get to have a nice day soon.

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  11. sebastard,

    So your logic dictates that all “normal” people should own a home if they rent and buy a car if they hate transit. Please indicate what is normal and could I please borrow money from you since all your solutions is to purchase all things to convenience a person in today’s economy.

    Some people don’t have the $$ to do so. Hope you didn’t major in economics. Would you like fries with that?

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  16. Sounds like a good time to move or at least explain your concerns with the landlord. With invisible cars, dead daughters and pedophile husbands, it sounds like she’s not playing with a full deck so a direct conversation might not be the best course of action.
    Erratic behavior alone may not get her evicted, mention the cigarette burn in the carpet to the landlord, that might do the trick.

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