Dan Savage

Q: I’m a 23-year-old guy and I have been dating my 21-year-old girlfriend for about two years. We did the long-distance thing for a year, and after she graduated, she moved from the east coast to the midwest to be with me while I finish my degree. Everything was great until she moved in with […]

Q: I’m a straight male and I love my fiancee. She’s perfect. But while I am physically attracted to her, I find myself masturbating rather than having sex with her. She knows, but we don’t talk about it—we can’t—and recently she walked in on me, and it was very awkward. I put it away and […]

Q: I’m writing on behalf of a 19-year-old guy with cerebral palsy. As you may know, CP causes the part of the brain responsible for motor function to work incorrectly. Troubles include muscle spasticity, weakness and/or painful contraction, sometimes a life spent in a wheelchair. My buddy is, like any 19-year-old, interested in finding out […]

Q: I’m a 31-year-old man and my girlfriend is 28. We’ve been in a monogamous relationship for four years. Recently we’ve been doing the long-distance thing and we’re going to be doing it for a while, until I can move from Canada to the United States. This is our problem: She brought up the idea […]

I’m 16 and gay. I recently got into an argument with my parents over whether HIV is spread by saliva or if you can be infected during oral sex. I thought that you were safe kissing and that it’s OK to have oral sex, but that you need to use condoms for anal sex. My […]

I’m a 52-year-old male, divorced for the pas eight years. I recently broke off a five-year relationship with a woman two years my senior. About six weeks ago, a new female worker started in our office. We’re really hitting it off and, frankly, I’ve fallen for her—hard! However, she is 36, and never married. I […]

Hey, everybody: If you missed last week’s column, I’m taking a week off because, well, go read last week’s column if you care to know. Here’s an old column—from May 24, 1995—
to tide you over until my return next week. It not only features my mother, but also my boyfriend’s very first mention in the […]

I thought I could bang out a column today—a regular column, a column about my readers’ problems and their freaky fetishes and all those asshole politicians out there. You know, the usual. The day my son was born, I managed to slip out of the maternity ward and write a column; I wrote one the […]

I am a 28-year-old straight girl two years into my first marriage: new job, new home and new city 1,200 miles from my closest friends. It was really lonely at first, not knowing anyone nearby. Plus, hubby is far less social than I am, and has not gone out of his way to help us […]

When I was in my teens to mid-20s, I fought a burgeoning weight problem. My heaviest was 235 pounds on a five-foot-ten frame. Now I watch what I eat and I work out. I have a six-pack. And here’s my problem: I get too much attention from women. When I was out of shape, women […]

I watched a video of your recent appearance on Real Time with Bill Maher and you appeared to be wearing a Queen’s University engineering jacket. I was a Queen’s med school student and am now an emergency doctor at the same university and have seen those jackets around for the past decade—where did you get […]

I’m in my final year of high school and I decided to come out as a lesbian—a very foolish move, as I live in a small town that’s not exactly brimming with tolerant people. But I know there are other closeted people at my school and I figured if none of us ever took the […]