Dan Savage

QI had a stroke a year ago. The woman I was dating at the time stepped away. I have no hard feelings but I long for intimacy again. I am profoundly grateful that I don’t have any major outward injuries from the stroke, but my stamina is still very low and might always be. That […]

QI’m a European heterosexual girl, and reading your column from afar has been a good way for me to better know the sex world! I am wondering if you have advice for me about a “faster” way to do blowjobs. Or rather a way to make my boyfriend come faster from them. I like doing […]

Q I’m someone who does gay porn for a living. How do people who do gay porn meet someone who doesn’t just sexualize or fetishize them? I can’t eat, sleep and breathe my work constantly, but the guys I meet want me to live out the “porn persona” version of myself all the time. How […]

QYou’ve said that everyone is entitled to a “zone of erotic autonomy.” I was wondering if you thought that “zone” extends to sending thousands of dollars to a “FinDom.” I’m a 33-year-old straight woman and I love my husband and we have a great (or so I thought) sex life. He’s very dominant and controlling […]

QI have a quick question about bisexuality. What if one has a preference for dating straight individuals? As a straight woman, I am only interested in dating straight men. Is that some kind of phobia? Or is it OK for that to be a preference? I’ve always wanted to ask someone this but I’m afraid […]

Q I’m a cis bi guy in my 40s who doesn’t have a lot of experience with other men. I’m happily married to a wonderful woman who knows I’m bi, and while we’re presently monogamous, we’ve talked about opening things up in the future. If that happens, I’d like to casually hook up with a […]

QI’m a female in my late twenties. I broke up with a toxic ex about a year ago and I’ve been walking around (my house!) thinking I was over it. I never missed him and rarely thought about him. A brief backstory: In the final months of us living together, we started having more discussions […]

Q I’m a 29-year-old straight male. I’ve been with my 25-year-old partner for six years. I love her and think that we are perfect for each other. We have all the things that make existing with someone wonderful. But about two years into our relationship I had a two-week-long affair while I was out of […]

QI’ve been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years and we have a great relationship–or so I thought. Last week, I snooped on my boyfriend’s browser history and I don’t know what to do with what I found. I’m a longtime reader and Savage Lovecast listener SO I KNOW WHAT I DID WAS WRONG. I believe my […]

I want to thank everyone who attended our third Savage Love Livestream last Saturday night. Mistress Matisse was our very special guest, and we tackled a lot of questions about BDSM over a very lively 90 minutes. We didn’t get to every question–there were so many–but I will now, as promised, power through as many […]