Well, let me tell you; YOU AREN’T! Long before i met you, I only heard bad things about you. Once I met you, I realized all the things i heard were true and I promised myself never to get invovled with you… Then I found myself dating you (and I really don’t know why!). Each day I spent with you, you made me sicker and sicker; from your dirty finger nails and your not showering, to your disgusting, annoying habits. I ran my ass around for you, got in shit for you, spent my hard earned money on you (because everybody knows you can NEVER EVER keep a job for more than a week), ditched my friends for you, embarassed myself for you, dealt with your bullshit “anti-establishment” (wannabe) lifestyle, put up with your bitching about religion, school and suburbs, dealt with you being a useless dropout, FUCK .. I even almost had your child. Yet, when I finally grew the balls to peace out and leave you behind you begged and pleaded for me to stay, but I knew smarter. So, when I had to be mean to make you leave me alone I went from being the best thing that ever happened to you, to being the worst girlfriend ever, who never made you go to class, who never supported your decisions, who never did anything for you. Well, we all know now that the words that come out of your mouth are all bullshit so everyone can hear exactly what they want. You’re useless, you’re a waste of space. Oh, and by the way .. for all the girls who you’ve cheated on (because we all know it’s the biggest part of your rep, and you love to live up to it) this one’s for them … I CHEATED ON YOU, SO HA !
This article appears in Apr 24-30, 2008.