I’ve loved you unconditionally for more than a decade in fact for close to 20 years. You’ve abuse me emotionally, taking what you can and have lied continuously. Yet unconditionally means without conditions. I couldn’t have stopped loving you.
Yet, what you have done was so hurtful, but I don’t miss you. I feel angry and confused. All those years…have you always been so insincere? I’ve given you my youth and you took it; wasted it. I am glad you’re gone. I will always love you-but I will never talk to you again. —Bear…just gone
This article appears in May 21-27, 2015.
“…but I will never talk to you again.” is not a statement which reflects unconditional love.
ROMANTICISM & PSYCHOPATHOLOGY
In view of the way s/he has treated you for nearly 20 years I think you are confusing “unconditional love” with a thorough-going masochism. However, both states are related in that, while such unconditional love is little more than irrational infatuation, masochism is the irrational yearning for punishment. The first is irrational romanticism but the second is irrational psychopathology. While related, the two should never be confused.
A pleasure as always,
Cheerio!
There is a name for the OB – DOOR MAT. Why do people put up with shit like this. Kick them to the curb, get happy with yourself and carry on.
Until you own it you will have difficulty making better decisions in the future. People will do what they can get away with. You allowed him or her to get away with treating you like that just by the act of staying. you chose to throw away your youth by being with someone who you had to have known on some level didn’t value or respect you. I am not saying the person is not a dick. I am sure they are. But you do need to take some time to reflect on your own choices and self worth etc so as not to end up with another. blaming someone else for our own choices creates resentment and helplessness and causes us to remain stuck in a sort of limbo.
On the bright side, it is tough to move on, take control, and begin a new chapter in life but hopefully you are doing it. Amazing things can happen for you.
Sadly enough, the ultimate outcome of codependency is the damage done by a lack of respect in these relationships.
Especially the lack of respect in one’s self. If you don’t respect yourself, how can you expect others to.
suppose just letting you go is better than it could have gone…
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/27/nyregion…
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/mar/…
i know who this is…the guy. I’ll tell you, the OP was under the spell of an abusive narcissist. Do some research on that folks, before you spout off insulting nonsense. The man is a using prick and I’ve seen what he can do. He’s a piece of shit, lucky to have been loved at all. Plus he’s a pederass. Op doesn’t know this, but I do.
Oh, my, did I miss something? I just complimented the moderator booting Nukka and no_fool of the board and this is the thanks I get!
Oh my lord, Nukka was banned?
What happened?
Ouch, words can hurt 🙁
You’re starting to remind me of a bitter old hen that frequented this site 🙂
And CCM? Psssh, I drive a Cervelo P3 which costs more than your car.
Well, I see yet another “adult” cannot understand the Coast’s simple Comment Policy.
Why is it so hard for some of you to just play nice?
^^What, did your “Nukka.” profile get deleted too?
The Mod also wears sandals, so no toe jam there. Trust me 🙂
Yup, they’re all good 🙂
I thought so. Your attempt at reverse psychology, however, is quite amusing. I’m surprised ohhappyday hasn’t snapped you right up.
I must admit returning to the board has been quite disappointing. So many banal, boring posts (with a few notable exceptions) to made-up bitches.
For example, I would tell the above OB to drink two bottles of Jack Daniels and start an affair with a tub mat.
Oh my lord, reverse psychology? I have to Google enough stuff that MM says and I’m not about to do it for you too.