Thanks to you, I’m now strangely attracted to guys with a man bun. Why’d you have to be so cute?! And how the hell do I even still think about you after this long?! Fuuuuuck —Still think you’re handsome, uniform and all.

This article appears in Apr 2-8, 2015.

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  3. Did his uniform consist of “kinky boots” and a le Chateau pea coat? If so, you can find him at the courthouse filing a frivolous lawsuit … but you may not be his type.

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  5. Next time you see him and he forgets to put it up, just tell him to grab some elastics from out of his purse.

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  8. Man buns make me want to carry scissors with me at all times and cut then all off. The same with long scraggly beards that may or may not support a nest of small animals. gross.

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