To our next door alcoholic (who we hardly even know) – We recently got married in our back yard (quiet mid-morning ceremony…or so we thought!) We told you ahead of time that we wanted our privacy…when you came to our door insisting on inviting yourself! What the hell were you thinking when you assumed you could holler at us from your back yard asking for pictures of us on our special day? We ignored you, but then you came over to our yard insisting on taking our picture…with your camera!! We politely asked you (twice) to please leave as this was a private moment. Then you had to be yelled at to leave. Your caliber of intelligence certainly shone through when you said “Well, you don’t have to be so f***ing rude”! Listen up lady, lay off the booze (yes, we could tell by the slur in your voice that you were drinking at 11 a.m.!), go to AA meetings, and stay far, far away from us. —Pissed Off Bride
This article appears in Aug 29 – Sep 4, 2013.
I would have made it a true “shotgun wedding” with shotgun in hand to ward off pesky inebriated neighbors and say…Go ahead ” Make my day”
Just thank her for creating a distraction so the inappropriate comments from the “drunken uncle” weren’t noticed.
Should have put a hitch on that trailer and hauled ass out of there!
Great, Drunk Uncle was afforded a distraction while all of this was going on. Now some kid is gonna need therapy eventually. Nice.
a question….why would you feel the need to tell her ahead of time that you wanted your privacy? has she been inappropriate in the past? it sounds as if you knew there might be a problem. heck, it’s your back yard so you have the *right* to a decently private wedding, but if you knew she could be a problem, I don’t think you should have had an *expectation* of a decently private event.
if you have a crummy neighbour, chances are they are going to foul up your events, but not in any way you could get them arrested for.
You can’t fix stupid *sigh*
Does she get slutty drunk, if so, bring her to the next meeting?
And you can’t pass a law to make stupid illegal.
They did, but had to arrest all the cops.
*swish*