I was at a friend’s place over the holidays and I had a chance to watch his kids play a video game called Grand Theft Auto. The point of the game seemed to be to kill as many people as you could to rack up points… the people didn’t defend themselves (I was told that they sometimes do) so basically it was “pointless” violence. The kids enjoyed the game and giggled whenever someone’s brains got splattered on the back wall. There was no real feeling attached to it (it was fun though) it was just a “game”. But I wonder, the parents didn’t seem too concerned when I mentioned the violence in the game to them… nah, it couldn’t be evil… —If I’m 555

This article appears in Feb 23-29, 2012.

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60 Comments

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  7. modst of those fucking gta’s are too fucking noisy, and promote the idea, that stealing is cool, the killing part, is just an added bonus. i would never let any kids of mine play it, and even today, they think those games are just fucking stupid. notice that i did not say retarded, oops.
    did you know that some of thse games with wildly flashing lights and shit, can trigger epolepsy(?).

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  8. *fighting seizure robots* bugs bunny made me want to kill, hugo, i wanted to grab that freaking roadrunner by the throat

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  9. I sincerely hope that there’s a private reel out there that the WB animators did for private enjoyment where every ACME device works, where Speedy Gonzales dies of hanta virus after crossing the Rio Grande, where the Bulldog eats Granny and Sylvester is running around with a screaming Tweetyfuckingbird impaled on his dick.

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  10. What I love is that some idiot gamers think since they play those games that they are real soldiers and could actually take on a real soldier, cop, drive better than professional, and land passenger jets.

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  13. BroTim what we obviously need are bus driver games, then all the experts could go petition the city , to take over the bus drivers jobs & use their high scores to show us how great they are.
    Sounds like it would also be perfect for brain surgeons & nuclear bomb techs…what could go wrong ? you’ve got one of the games higher scores ~;p

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  14. i’m fairly certain i could drive a bus, with training, but i don’t know how long i’d last. a school bus would be worse, i’d be all veronica crabtree

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  15. Don’t forget the bulldog could eat that little kitten too, Ivan. You know; the one that the dog barks at and the kitten just crawls up to its back, kneeds and dozes off.

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  16. My next door neighbor plays games like this all day long, I hear him over there yelling at his computer (I guess you can talk to other people you play against online) and then when he comes over to visit me, his eyes are all bugged out and he looks crazed. I don’t think these games are good at all, they’re too violent. I think parents buy them to keep their kids occupied all day. Look at the amount of time people spend playin them,… so they see it as like a babysitter. The kids are in their room and out of their hair for hours on end. It’s like a parent’s dream… Just hope the kids don’t stab them in the middle of the night while they’re sleeping.

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  18. I always liked that little kitten, Bisc. Especially the bulldog’s teary meltdown when he thought he’d accidentally eaten him. But Granny was a crunt.

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  19. Comic books were suspected as being behind juvenile deliquency in the 1950s – plus the aforementioned Warner Brothers cartoons and their flying anvils – the more things change the more they stay the same.

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  20. Don’t forget the kitten episode where the setting is the construction site and the mangy cat gets stuck between a hard hat and slop pail. And nothing is more cute than a bulldog barking “rock a bye baby.”

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  21. if you aren’t already a sociopath, i don’t think there’s any danger. tho if all your kid does is sit in the basement playing games, by themselves, that’s probably not healthy. ivan and biscuit, you can watch the whole cartoon it’s about seven minutes…here’s a snippet http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WUR_3QcvSM

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  24. Oh dear, now I shall have my account banned for promoting interspecies bestiality and hatred against cartoon canaries.
    Hay Sales Rep, did that cabbie appreciate the bottle of Scotch you gave him for Xmas?

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  25. Aww thanks Painey >; )

    And now, Goodnight Mr. & Mrs. America, and all you paranoid-schizophrenics at sea.

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  27. Actually, Ivanski, your hysterical remark reminds me fondly of the late Michael O’Donoghue who quit SNL leaving a note that read: ‘I did not leave the show, and if he (his boss, Dick Ebersol) should claim otherwise, he is, to steal a phrase from Louisa May Alcott,’a lying cunt.’

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  29. BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA – TTFN, I just slid halfway down the couch at that.

    Careful Hugo – I’ve just been informed by someone with considerable knowledge of human psychology that there’s a very real possibility that might act out that image. Lock up your cartoon canaries.

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  31. Thanks for that, Hugo – I’m a huge fan of all things Warner and Acme, including Tiny Toons, a respectable offering from Steven Spielberg in the 90s – great clip.

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  32. Please tell me that we’re not comparing GTA to Bugs Bunny. I find a wide abyss between Wile E. Coyote falling off a cliff and police officers getting murdered by various means.

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  33. Actually, you know what? This frosts my cupcakes a bit — why is Oldhandjob allowed to post under a new moniker (sales rep) after he posted viruses and hacked (and even got the board shut down, iirc), but Donarious keeps getting banned? All the usernames Donarious has used since he’s been banned as Donarious have been civil and hasn’t caused any problems…

    I’d say posting viruses and hacking is way more worthy of a life-time ban than Donarious’ behaviour (which I still think was ban-worthy, but he’s behaved since… so what the heck?).

    Meanwhile — oldhandjob is back being his narcissistic “I own everything” self. His post re: Biscuit above is so arrogant that it shows he’s going to continue to cause problems — which could end up, again, infecting other posters’ machines.

    So either ban Sales Rep or let Donarious post under different monikers if he shows that he’s behaving… which he clearly has shown.

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  34. he has miss kitty, he has. i would never compare the two things, critter guy, but that time was gentler and web free

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  36. Roger that Pretteh Kitteh. I’d say we should arrange a kaffeeklatsch playdate for OldHandRep and Jim Kramer/Darren Stephens. And Donairious gets to friccassee the loser.

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  37. The other night I got drunk and played GTA. I woke up the next morning, not remembering everything but I was lying next to a Dominican man and he said he woo’ed me with his dance skills so I had sex with him and that I drove him back to my place in a stolen car, hitting people on purpose and giggling. Apparently I crashed the car and almost died, but managed to run into McDonald’s to revive myself. I must have thought I was still playing GTA in my drunken haze. THERE IS PROOF video games ruin lives.

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  39. Tsk. All this aggro about video games….

    Only one thing I can say about this….

    LEEEROOOYYYYYY JJEEEENKINNNNSSSSSSSSS!!!!

    That is all.

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  42. For the record (even though this is a horribly obvious troll), there has been absolutely no scientific evidence to support the claim that video games cause violence. Also, most of the fucked-up shit you can do in GTA is *purely optional* and even then is pretty fucking tame compared to some other games (I’m looking at you, Manhunt).

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  43. I’d say, Brend….
    when the start of teh game is you needling people to escape an asylum…
    you know you’re in for a good ride. }:-D

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  47. Some games are not for kids – like the ones with the big ol’ ‘M’ on the front. That means Mature Gamers Only. That means contains material appropriate for ages 17+ only. You can watch it on TV, you can see it in the movies, why not in video games? Some of us adults like the fact that they’re old enough to enjoy such nonsense, knowing it’s ONLY A GAME and it’s no different than reading a book about the same matter… except that the player can choose what to do. Or NOT do.

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  48. Playing Jenga as a youth turned me into a crooked and corrupt income property-owner. I saved a lot of money by taking materials used on the bottom to build the top instead. Removing whatever else I could saved even more!

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  55. I read in Frank about that Drew chap. Apparently he was already in hot water for an assault on a female friend.

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  59. Hey Biscuit – Drew/oldhand is a troll from a long tme ago (drunk driver killer)(before my time), you probably have an idea of what he’s like. NGF – hates another banned poster named Sabestian. Both pissed Bird(the mod for ltwwb) off to such an extreme they both got the ban-hammer.

    BTW – zilla, maybe if you weren’t such an ass towards Mod Bird, you wouldn’t of had your ass kicked so bad.

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