What the fuck is wrong with you?! You offer to buy me a drink, I say “No, thank you”. You buy it anyway from across the bar, I refuse to drink it. Ten minutes later you sneak up behind me on the dance floor and put your hand on the small of my back. I keep moving away until I get fed up and yell “NO” again. What the fuck do you think “no” means? Do you think that just because you tried to buy me a drink you get a dance? Ten minutes later you’re back, with another drink. I say “no”, AGAIN. You try to grind with me, or whatever the fuck that was. I shove you away and tell you to “fuck off” and you, good sir, spit in my face… and run! FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE. If I ever see you again, I’m going to put my foot so far up your ass it’ll come out of your mouth. You messed with the wrong girl, I’m capable of bringing you down and I will. Pray you never see me again, motherfucker.
—Pissed
This article appears in Aug 27 – Sep 2, 2009.
Students are back, yay!
$20 says you don’t do shit OP. Keep dreaming though…
Give ‘er, Girl!
Guys like this asshole give the rest of us a bad name.
I would have thought after the first three times the OB would have went to security and have his ass kicked out the door. Or was she enjoying the attention. Enquiring minds want to know.
hahahaha
Or, Tim, the guy could have realized that no means no and creeped on someone else.
Any male who spits into a female’s face is a fucking coward. Especially after being told “No” repeatedly.
I bet the chump considers himself “a real man” too. And he probably bragged to his buds that “he settled some cunt’s hash” at the bar for “being mouthy”.
Sometimes it astounds me how poorly trained some males are. If I saw a guy spit in a gal’s face I’d stand up and do something.
Unless the gal kicked the guy in the balls for no good reason and he did it retaliation.
When this happens, you pick up the drink that he bought you, you walk back to where he is, you tell him to fuck off and you dump the drink on his lap if he says anything other than ‘okay, I understand’. Then, you walk away.
(You messed with the wrong girl, I’m capable of bringing you down and I will.)HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Honey if you were going to do anything…you would have done it. that is the funniest thing I have heard all day. hehehe
Sounds like the guy was a real loser who obviously went too far, BUT, on the other hand, guys need to be pushy to at least some extent in order to get any. Well, most guys anyway, unless you’re David Beckham or some other famous, rich, or ridiculously hot guy.
I can really only speak for myself, but it seems that most girls like guys chasing them and like playing hard to get, pretending they’re not interested. I’ve seen and heard of it numerous times, where a girl shuns a guy the first few times, but he keeps persisting and eventually gets the girl. My step-mom hated my dad at first and didn’t want anything to do with him, and now they’ve been together happily for over ten years! Watch “Life is Beautiful” (“La Vita è Bella”) for another prime example.
I’m also curious as to why you didn’t contact security, as well.
People like most of the ones that are posting on here in reply to this post are what’s wrong with this city.
I bet if you see someone getting beat up or raped, you’d stand there, watch, laugh and say, you must have provoked it.
Idiots!!!
The bottome line is that a lady, or ladies, have every right to go to a bar for a couple of drinks and to dance without having some prehistoric cave-man moron bothering them. End of story. And to Bro Tim, I highly dout she was anjoying it after telling him to shove his drink..twice.
yay students! Now we can start the Bouncer Bitches too!
Actually sneaking up and putting his hand on her after being turned down twice, is just not acceptable behavior. I’m sure many women like to be pursued, and sure, attention is flattering. But some guys assume that all girls just like to be pursued and pursued and pursued. It’s probably worked for him before – as long as he can find the one girl who’s drunk and self hating enough to go home with him, it doesn’t matter to him how many OP-type girls he pisses off.
People who write bitches need to stop concluding their bitches with “OMG, I’m so like gonna shove my foot up your ass, next time I see you, even though I probably never will, but still, WATCH OUT.” It’s just sad.
“”But some guys assume that all girls just like to be pursued…”
Funny thing about these ‘singles’ bars, eh?
Or was the OP just there to enjoy the “music”?
I never saw a sign over the bars that proclaimed it to be for singles. There is drinking for those who want to drink. There is music for those who want to listen. And, there is dancing for those who want to dance. Married, single or in between, a person should be able to choose who they invite to join them. And, talking to someone is one thing, but to touch them is a whole other thing.
It is the stupid reasoning here that causes people to throw their hands up in disgust and stop going out to enjoy dancing.
Yes, Mr. Frosty, there are people who think differently than you. They do go to enjoy the music and dancing. Dancing at home doesn’t have the same energy. And, they do not want to be hit on.
BMF: Nice quote out of context there…and yeah, plenty of people do go to bars to enjoy music. My male companion is nice enough to let me out of the house from time to time to dance or see a favourite band.
By the way…did anyone ever tell you you look like Al Pacino?
“Yes, Mr. Frosty, there are people who think differently than you.”
I know – what should we do about that anyway?
Frosty,
I felt weird about addressing your comment left on the Living Dead thread, so if everyone will excuse me, I will address it here.
I am sorry that I read you wrong. I thought the following statements were implying that you used opiates for inspiration:
“How can something that I’m allowed to take due to a broken arm/leg/kidney stones etc be all that bad to take recreationally?”
“I still say it’s a better bet, in moderation, than booze.”
I thought that you were speaking from experience. But, I was not judging you. I was merely offering you a safe alternative (meditation). I did feel that the former statement was a bit naive, considering all the warnings that come with prescription drugs, but other than that, I took your comment in the spirit that was intended.
“Instead of trying to drill into your children’s heads the “evils” of altered conciousness, and isolating them from you and your stuffy ‘authoritarian’ (and boring) attitude – why not explain the alternative methods of achieving it?”
Like me, you have misread comments. My kids are well informed of the uses of meditation. Although they have not pursued it, they know that alternate states can be achieved through practice. And, although I write formally, I am anything but authoritarian and ‘normal’. In fact, my kids call me a hippie, even though I was 6 when the 60s ended. I discourage the use of substances because there is a history of addiction on both sides of my kids’ family. But, that does mean that I do not feel herbal is preferable to synthetic. If weed could be administered in a controlled way to kids who take Ritolin, I would be the first to promote it.
“I know – what should we do about that anyway?”
[mouth falling open in astonishment]…er, well…you could beat everyone up who opposes you.
Wait, you already do that! You hammer them with your words = )
Continue on = p
Mole Rat, that was funny. Now that you mention it, I see it. The eyes, right?
The eyes…and the air of “You think you can take me? You need a fucking army if you gonna take me!”
Al (bad mr.frosty) Pacino in Scarface:
“What are you lookin’ at? You’re all a bunch of fucking’ assholes. You know why? You don’t have the guts to be what you wanna be. You need people like me. You need people like me so you can point your fuckin’ fingers, and say “that’s the bad guy.” So, what’ll that make you? Good? You’re not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don’t have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth. Even when I lie. So say goodnight to the bad guy. Come on. Last time you’re gonna see a bad guy like this again, let me tell you. Make way for the bad guy.”
Ha Ha! What a riot!
Soon to be seen in his new drama, “The Devil’s Advocate”
Bobby, I guess you don’t understand sarcasm (the enjoyment part) when you see it or can’t figure out the point of my post which was, if she or anyone else is being hassled or harassed at a bar, then get security or a staff member and report it to have the offender’s ass kicked out.
Hilarious! but apt.
(See Life Sucks, you are not the only who gets picked on, and it isn’t personal…we only do it in fun.)
Scarface:
“First you get the money, then you get the power, and then you get the women”.
Frosty:
“they really are only interested in “attracting” a high-status male”
Touch my back without a flurted invitation..?………………….and you’ll be picking up your fucking teeth with a broken arm, ……….or at least trying while looking through swollen eyeballs.
A girl once punched me in the face in high-school because she thought I was making fun of her – I was actually telling a friend about a TV show I had watched the night before. She came in from behind and I didn’t even see her until POP! – couldn’t believe it!
♪ girls just want to have fun, but not that kind, girls just want to have fun ♪
Why is it still acceptable for women to hit / punch / kick / spit on / scream at men, but not the other way around? If a woman does it, people think she must have good reason for it because the guy must have done something wrong, while if a guy does it, people think he’s an abusive control freak who should be arrested. I thought we’re all supposed to be treated equal.
And how can we always tell a “flirty invitation” anyway? Men, especially me I must admit, are notoriously bad at reading women’s signals. We’re not all Casanovas, and most of the guys who are you complain about being players!
Don’t mean to babble or sound bitter, I’m just recently back on the dating scene and a bit scared. I fucking hate the dating scene!
It is not acceptable for either males or females to go around slugging it other.
My brothers were taught that, generally, they were stronger than females, so there was no need to hit them, even if they are hit, as they have the strength to restrain them–not so the other way around.
You know, if a guy simply tells me he finds me attractive, I am not offended. If he asks me to sit and chat for bit, and I do, than it is likely that I also find him attractive. If he asks me to dance and I say yes, ditto. But, if I say, I am sorry but I am here with friends, it is a polite way of saying, I don’t want the same thing as him. Same with a dance request. If I am there to do my own thing, I will let it be known. It is not personal (he are a stranger), so he should not feel that he has been rejected. We are merely two different people who want two different things.
“” Oh…MY …GOD…Cindy/Susie/Lateesha!! Did you see that? Colin Farrell/Brad Pitt/Chris Martin just bought me a drink and then asked me to dance!! He evn put his arm around me…what a gentleman!! Oooh, I feel so pretty! “”
Unfortunately, when a girl/woman goes out to a singles/pick-up bar, she is not able to pick and choose which males will come over and offer her a banana or some ants on a stick…oops that’s chimps…anyway, you see my point…
If you like drinking and techno music so much, but can’t stand the odd low-status male giving his best “shot”…stay home. You can listen to baD mR fRosTy’s stuff for FREE, lol, and a bottle of Thunderbird fightin’ wine is only a fiver!
quxippmmdnwx… I don’t blame you mate, just reading some of the vitriolic posts from female Coast readers makes one think one is best off just averting one’s eyes, speak when spoken too, and maybe the odd time lay your coat down across the puke-filled gutter for ‘er royal ‘ighness to trod across…and go home for a bitter jerk watching re-runs of Three’s Company…Jeezus Christ on a popsicle stick I’m glad I’m not out there in the dating “scene”…
…although I think I still got that old Chloroform glove ’round here somewhere…
Yeah….except his best shot involved hitting on her at least 6 times to the point of harrassment, and then spitting in her face after she tried to regain her personal space. Anyone can hit on anyone at a bar, I’m in full agreement with that – but come on now. Is there no middle ground between Brad Pitt and douche who spits in your face? Give me a break.
Are you serious dude? How does saying it’s not cool to be followed, harrassed and assaulted get twisted into “vitriolic posts from female Coast readers”? Pretty sure we got some guys here disagreeing with that kind of behavior as well, despite your insistence on making it a men vs women issue.
nice rape joke by the way
Wow. So because you don’t understand the proper way to behave around women, qpmzwonxeibcruv, it’s their fault and women are just confusing or misleading? I can’t imagine why you’re back on the dating scene.
Janet was hot.
But it’s OK to “shove someone and scream FUCK-OFF” because they bought you an (unwanted) drink?
Gimme a break…
Gotta admit if Denzel Washington or Gary Cooper turned their eyes my way, I would go a bit weak in the knees = ). But, it isn’t the power or the money, it is the type. There is something about the person they are, or are projecting, that appeals to me. And, they would not have to come bearing ants on a stick. That said, if they started peeing all around the room, I would boot their ass out.
Speaking of chimps…
Male chimps get turned down all the time. But, since there is no TV or porn, they simply turn to each other.
As for the Three’s Company thing–if guys watched it BEFORE they went out, they could calm the fuck down and take a NO as a no.
Your statement, Frosty, just explained why women turn many men down. The women know exactly why men are trying to buy them a drink. And, they know that if they accept the drink, it is expected that they will have to take the banana that gets shoved their way after they drink it. Well, women aren’t always in the mood for a banana, unlike men. And, even if they did feel like a banana, they certainly aren’t going to take one from a man who needs to deaden their taste buds with alcohol in order to make it palpable. As well, who wants to take a banana from someone who offers it up so freely. Women like their bananas to be fairly fresh.
Also, any man who would lay his coat over muck and mire just to make my travels more comfortable would certainly get a second look, no matter the type. It is about how he perceives me (a princess, a lady, whatever) and his willingness to sacrifice that makes him attractive–not all mating decisions are based on looks and power. This type of man may offer a banana, ultimately, but he is offering it with respect and care, so the chances of the banana actually turning out to be a rotten apple are less likely.
And finally, as usual, you have conveniently overlooked the important detail that caused outrage: he touched her (after she warned him more than once that she was not interested). You are so determined to make guys the victim that you overlook the bad behaviour. The funny thing is, if it was your mother, your sister or your woman that was being targeted this way, you would be more outraged than they would be. Why do men have such a problem putting this type of situation into fair perspective?
You conveniently forgot the part in between where he sneaks up behind and touches her without asking and continues to invade her personal space as she backs away. And yes, fuck off is the phrase you use when you’ve already said “no thanks” 5 times. Please stop embarrassing yourself.
Mole Rat, I don’t think he forgot the ‘part in between’ (yes, I am twisting your meaning :). It is the refusal of giving the part-in-between that causes anger and resentment. Yet, when a mother slaps the boy’s hand for trying to steal a cookie from the cookie jar, he may feel the same way, but I am sure he doesn’t call his mother a fucking uptight bitch.
Or spit in her face.
If we were on the planet Akakis..spitting on someone is akin to ‘sharing water’
Which is a really good thing…………..there.
Here, not quite so good. Unfortunately we’re only hearing one side of the story, which more often than not is colored to favor the person who tells it.
“”The women know exactly why men are trying to buy them a drink”‘
Do they? Or do they just THINK they do?
Has it ever occured to you that there are many men out there that think it’s just a nice way to buy a few minutes of your time for a quick chat, or maybe (god forbid, as the OP whines “get a dance”) and that’s all? Why not just take it graciously (and be sure to see it poured, but roofies are another thread), saying “OK but just this one” or some such. Maybe even jokingly point out some other girls and say “she’s more your type, lol”. Whatever. It’s a drink. I know girls who go to these bars with NO MONEY…obviously they are stronger and more independent that you lot…boohooo
Get your panties out of a bunch sister(s), just wait a few more years when NO-ONE buys you squat and then see how cocky you are!
I assume though, that you and the OP have already “judged” this particular book by its cover, so even if he DID turn out to be witty, charming and funny…you’ve already filed him under “loser” anyway, based solely on his appearance…
Sure, this particular guy was overly “persistent”, forget about him…but “putting his hand in the small of (my) back…” hardly seems out of place for a crowded dance bar for fuck’s sake! What about tapping your s-s-s-shoulder…is that “s-s-s-sexual assault” now as well…?
I’m not “sticking up” for this clumsy dude…nor am I calling “men” victims…don’t be ridiculous (again)….but nor am I content to sit back and go tsk tsk, the beast! everytime some chick at a singles bar gets some unwanted attention. If you want to be left alone, go to the theatre, a soft-seat concert etc etc…but you are going to a place where people, yes even many women, are trying to be social and meet new people…trying to overcome the loneliness and emptiness of their lives perhaps…get over a break-up etc
…trying to maybe go home to their lonely cold-water flat, alone once more, and say Well, I didn’t meet that perfect girl tonight, but at least I bought a few drinks for a couple of women, had a brief chat or two, and tommorrow’s another day…
Jesus H. Christo on a popcicle sticko, relax…
I can indeed, see why many visitors to Halifax, are horrified with some women here. In most other cultures – Latino for instance, a women is happy to take a drink from a man…it doesn’t mean ANYTHING, other than the man thinks you are attractive/a good dancer etc…but here, oh no! It means he wants’ta touch my dirty pillows!!
Maybe he even thinks a drink will entitle him to put, you know,..his “thing” in daddy’s secret spot!!
Grow up.
Have a drink, and shut the fuck up.
a lonely cold water flat…now thats funny
Yeah…….no.
“Do they? Or do they just THINK they do?”
Frosty, you’re not talking to some random snotty bitches here who take pleasure in being cruel. You are speaking to, mostly, experienced women. They are telling you, over and over again, what they have learned through their years of experience. They are telling you, over and over again, what is considered bad behaviour. Who wouldn’t like some good conversation while enjoying a drink offered as a good will gesture? Obviously, there is a problem that you either refuse to acknowledge or that you don’t understand.
You are NOT a woman. Therefore, you have NOT had to deal with the problems that come with being a woman. So, you are NOT entitled to judge women who are fed up after who knows how many negative experiences.
I think that you are addressing the wrong sex here. Maybe you should start preaching to the men who have ruined it for the males who ARE sincere and harmless.
I don’t know if this one can be outdone (as far as unusual goes), but this really happened to me:
I agreed to meet a party of friends at the Palace. I got there first, and since it was my first time, I unwittingly sat at a table near the men’s room (I was trying not to appear obvious).
So, this guy comes out of loo with his zipper down and plops down in a chair at my table, making sure to pull his chair out and face me. The first words out of his mouth were, “So, I had a wet dream last night…”, and then he went on to tell me all about it. So, I am frozen in place, to polite to say, Fuck off, perv”, and I am staring at his forehead in an attempt to pretend that I don’t notice what is displayed before me. Then, he offers me a drink, which I decline, and then he asks me if I see anything else that interests me. I say, “Yes, the phone. I have to call my babysitter to check on my kid.” He then reaches forward, tucks a twenty in my blouse and says, “That is to pay your sitter. Come right back, okay?” Needless to say, I kept going right out the front door.
What do I do within seconds? I walk right into some dirty guy with a scar on his neck that went from ear to ear. I say, “I am so sorry.” He says, “Haven’t we met before? You live ___?” Yeah right, like I am going to forget meeting a character such as him. And, I certainly knew better than to tell him where I lived. I simply said, “I just moved here”, as I turned and hurried to meet my friends.
This was only one of my life experiences that has caused me to stop talking, dancing and accepting drinks from strange men.
You had me right up until the “Palace”, and then…nothing surprises me.
Back in the day, before I moved onwards and upwards…I played that hole at least 30 times, and it seems nothing has changed…
three words…location location location
I agree. There is a good reason that one of its tag is the Meat Market. If I feel like I want to attempt a night out, I will sometimes go to Boomers. It is a smaller, older crowd for the most part, so the air of desperation is minimal. Although attempts at pick ups are part of the parcel, polite refusals are generally respected. It is more like a house party…or at least, it used to be. It has been a few years = )