I went on eharmony and was matched up with you, and we were very compatible.
We didn’t exchange pictures right away because we both agreed that we should focus on our non-physical attributes. We got along amazingly and talked on there everyday for over 2 weeks. We then moved our interactions to the phone.
After having long conversations on the phone a few times, I suggested meeting up. You agreed.
Then I suggested giving you my picture, I said we should at least know what one another looks like. You insisted that it didn’t matter, that you were sure I looked fine. So, we didn’t exchange pictures.
I met you for a coffee. You were pretty. I greeted you with a smile, I offered to buy you a beverage. You looked at me in shock and said I’m sorry, I don’t think this will work out, no offense but your not my type at all! Then you left me standing there!
What the fuck? After all we had in common, after all those times we laughed and had long conversations on the phone, after you knowing I was a lawyer and had money…you abandon me upon first seeing me…obviously you didn’t find me attractive enough!
Was I really that hideous that you would run off despite personality, compatibility and money? My guess, NOT! Well, fuck you, it’s your fucking loss!—Turned down flat!
This article appears in Apr 8-14, 2010.
Because money is somehow less superficial than looks?
Sorry dude, looks matter, everyone deserves to pursue someone who they are physically attracted to. Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone who thinks you’re ugly?
Looks matter. If she were 350bls and 5’1″ and looked like Shrek’s mother, I’m sure you would have high tailed it outta there.
No one wants the inconvenience of bags over heads during sex. The crinkling and rattling sounds can be distracting.
At least this girl was honest and straight forward with you. At least she didn’t waste any more of your time. Besides maybe it was something else, maybe you smell bad… were you sitting with shorts on with your legs splayed open by any chance?
Are you hideous OP? I think a photo is the only way to really figure this one out. Let us judge you.
Looks totally matter. Maybe it’s superficial, but looks are incredibly important.
fizz: good one, that’s what i thought as well
Looks do matter!! HaliwoodGirl is right. It is not superficial at all. Attraction is key!
I am sure she didn’t mean to hurt your feelings
Op never said looks didn’t matter. He actually asked to exchange photos. It was the woman who said no, it wasn’t necessary–that it didn’t matter. And, regardless of whether it mattered to him or not, he showed up anyway, at the very least, out of courtesy. She, on the other hand, was rude, insensitive and dishonest.
Try again, OP. There are lots women out there who possess the very (important) qualities she lacks.
ah yes, another siter for losers that have nothing to offer. guys looking for fast pussy, girls looking for prince charming. forget it, the vast majority don’t work out, and those same people waste your time. and then some one gets rich, because of your lack of insocial skills in the real world. comic book man, and mrs. crabtree, a match from there, comes to mind. one a loser, the other well, a bitch. if you go there, don’t get your prince or princess, you are the only one to blame. so, why while that the other wasn’t a raving beauty, when you, yourself are probly a toad too.
He didn’t outright say it HKM but he certainly implied it by ragging on her for “putting looks first”. He’s basically calling her superficial, while he lists his money as something she should have considered before rejecting him. A little hypocritical if you ask me. If money is a good reason to stay then looks are a good reason to leave.
And if they had exchanged pictures the same thing would have happened anyway so why does that matter? She would have rejected him based on looks and it would have hurt his feelings.
And what did she do that was so dishonest? She was remarkably honest even at the risk of being a little blunt and hurting his feelings. But in the long run saving them both a lot of time and heartache.
Pretending she saw something happening between them while she isn’t interested at all is dishonest, rude, and insensitive. Is that what you would have had her do to him?
Sorry but people aren’t going to coddle you feelings when it comes to internet dating. If you try it you have to be prepared to be rejected, and he’s lucky he got rejected by someone honest and straightforward as opposed to being rejected a few months from now by someone who’s strung him along for fear of hurting his feelings.
and ladies, maybe if he had a 12 inch cock, she would have considered a couple hundred dates then. some females piss me off. there is no mr. perfect, and if there was, he would be too fucking wrapped up in himself. same as a lot of females are.
“No one wants the inconvenience of bags over heads during sex. The crinkling and rattling sounds can be distracting.”
AHAHAHAHAHA. I *heart* you, HG!
12 inches? gross…
LS: Cock doesn’t matter if we can’t get past the twice fucked with a cheese grater then shit on face. It would be like the girl you’re screwing had back acne that was in the shape of your grandmother on her ass and back while you get her from behind because you can’t stand to look at her mug. It just doesn’t work.
If looks didn’t matter, then we’d all be blind.
I think that people should be with someone they are attracted to, within reason. However, by saying that they did not need to exchange pics because it “really didnt matter” the female party obviously screwed up, considering it “did” matter.
As a postscript, I think the OP sounds like a douchbag anyway, even with a valid bitch… “I am a lawyer, I have money, have sex with me!”
The most important feature in a guy to me is his face. I’ve dated men with hot to average to bony to tubby bodies, but they all had gorgeous faces.
it’s all about the smell bitches, and the brain must work well above average
If you’re not attracted to someone, then it’s not going to work out. She was good enough to tell you right away that she wasn’t attracted to you. She didn’t even care that you were a lawyer and had money, which is good; she didn’t use you.
He said she was pretty. If he found her to be the version of Barney Gumble dressed in grag, we wouldn’t be commenting on this bitch because he would have spit out his hot coffee and left a cloud in the shape of his former self (Beep Beep!) has he booted it out the door.
“as” not “has”… damn Monday brain
May I recommend the Coast’s date site?
I agree, fizz, that he may be just as superficial as her, but he didn’t say that looks didn’t matter, she did (and in that way, she was dishonest). If photos had been exchanged, and his appearance didn’t appeal to her, she could have found many ways to say, sensitively, we are not a match. Looking into his face and turning and running was rude.
No chemistry, no point, OP. I would have ended it as soon as you said you were a lawyer.
= D (That’s what I was thinking.)
“I’m sorry, I don’t think this will work out, no offense but your not my type at all!”
Nothing about the above statement is rude or insensitive. Saying something like, “I’m sorry, you’re ugly” is rude and insensitive. Laughing in his face is rude and insensitive. Staying and pretending she’s interested while he buys her food is rude and insensitive. Even if he had sent her the picture I’m betting he’d still have posted this bitch. It wouldn’t have changed a thing, and he’d feel just as shitty afterward.
Sorry, there’s just no way to reject someone without making them feel shitty, and she isn’t responsible for his feelings, she was as honest and as considerate as she could have been given the situation. He felt shitty about it and vented here. I’m just trying to point out that this isn’t the worst type of rejection that could have happened to him on an internet dating escapade.
He should get over it and count himself lucky.
what if he looked like i don’t know lyle lovett ya i don’t think so
Lawyers suck
OP here. Fuck y’all!
Just kidding. WTF is ehmarmony?
Looks and attraction are very important. You can hide behind the polite lie that they aren’t, but they so very are. However she wasn’t all that honest to begin with. To have played the “looks don’t matter” card and then to follow that up with the manner in which she conducted herself? Her actions were rude.
What I truly love … is the gender disparity at play here. Turn the tables. You know, how things typically go. Girls would be out in defense of their fellow sister lamenting how poorly and undeservingly she had been treated by some vain, superficial douchebag that was beneath her and wasn’t worth her anyhow. Yet here is a woman pulling that same routine.
Remember you can’t have it both ways, ladies. You want a gentleman, you want honesty? Then don’t be a walking lie and a flake to boot.
Switch the genders and my opinion is exactly the same refinedsugar.
ngf, it’s a meat market for lifes losers, or soon to be. like plenty of fish and the rest of those fucking stupid pointless sites, they like to get your money, match you with your ex wife, or whatever, and say they have a success story. very, very rarely, do couples meet, hook up, and go beyond the first fuck. there a a couple of exceptions, one of which is on here.
Never meet without seeing a pic first. If they refuse, don’t meet. Simple. Saves both parties time and embarrassment such as OP’s ordeal.
MAN you must look like half a hulk face. ahaha
Don’t despair OP,not all females are shallow bitches.Someday you’ll find a girl who accepts you for you.Heck,I never thought I would be attracted to a man that was shorter than me and balding,but it happened.Don’t give up.All is not lost.
NGF…I thought you were a DJ?
Awww poor lil lawyer!
I sure am!
Wouldn’t you rather someone who found you physically attractive? I mean, everyone is attractive to somebody, you just need to find that match with someone who you’re attracted to as well. =)
OH OH FREAKY MCFREAKMEISTER IS BACK; GO AWAY YOU FRIGHTEN ME 🙁
“You insisted that it didn’t matter, that you were sure I looked fine.” What have I said about the word “fine” coming from a womens mouth.
Watch out!
I’m pretty sure I did this to a man once. I felt horrible about myself but I learned two things. 1. It’s reality that a mutual physical attraction is required – it doesn’t even have to be sexual at first, but some inkling is good. and 2. Don’t prolong telephone/on-line courtship. It’s never the whole picture. Even when they have a pic, so what. If you’re looking for the whole package, engage with the whole package live and in person before getting too acquainted, and don’t romanticize with someone you’ve never met. Bad bad ideas. I never did that again.
You should feel bad about spelling your name in such an unfunny manner.
How did people EVER manage to date for all those centuries before the internet came along??? LOL!
I ask myself the same, Oceanlady.
The ancient Greeks and Romans didn’t have the Internet and the men were shagging little boys daily and maybe their wives on the side. See they were able to have a wife and have sex with or date others.
Maybe the Internet is ruining relationships?
They didn’t date, they just asked the girl’s dad if they could have her… simpler times. Man, it would be awesome to be a classic housewife… no school, no responsibilities. Just make home and play with your kids all day, bake bread… have dinner parties… wear evening gloves and pretty hats… music didn’t suck back then. That’s the life!
And no, feminists, I’m not being sarcastic. That would be sweet.
LIFE SUCKS –> whooo is Mrs. Crabtree?
You should ALWAYS exchange photos first, lots of photos of you from different angles. The fact of the matter is that while the person is building up all that information in their mind, they’re also building up an idea of what they think you look like, whether it’s conciously or subconciously. Falling for someone is the feeling of something exciting and new but because they’ve already formed a picture of you in their minds, any amount of disappointment is going to ruin that.
Back in the 70s, there was an actual personal column in the Chronically Horrid – only the very desperate would even think of replying to one back then. I did have one buddy who answered one that sounded promising – she ended up meeting the doppelganger of the Joker in a pack of cards – plus he had the personality of a asthmatic walrus on absinthe. I consider on-line dating pretty much the same – risky at best – like my dear ol’ mam used to say: Expectations are planned disappointments.
The first thing to do is remove your ‘fan-dom” of the coast from your FB page, if applicable…let’s watch the numbers go down!
Second, join here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?v=wall…
Third, if you have, like many on here, admitted smoking pot, breaking the law, hating Stephen Harper or not liking donairs….it’s time to inundate the COAST with requests to have your formerly ‘anonymous” posts REMOVED!!
Join now. The first 20 members (we have 6 in the first 5 minutes!) get a free copy of thursday’s Coast where the editors thunder and bellow their defense of their spineless roll-over!
5 points if they whine about “libel”
10 if they cry about “Fire in a movie theatre”
lmao @ the coast