To all you drivers who come into my work and pick up and deliver me packages, i cant stand when you try to hit on me, its uncalled for, i’ve spoken with a few other receptionists and they feel the same way, we are only here to do our job, its not time to try to get a date, are you really that desperate that you have to use your job to pick up a lady, get a life and next time just drop of your package and quietly leave.
—Shawty
This article appears in Aug 20-26, 2009.
That’s all they want to do. Come in and “drop off” their “package” and leave quietly.
he just wants to know if you need his big package overnight 😉
It’s probably the highlight of his God forsaken day to deliver packages to a miserable po-faced slut like you.
When the delivery drivers have a coffee meet they probably discuss miserable customers and who is and who isn’t a complete twat – guess which list you’re on?
What’s wrong Basil? Never get hit on? Someone is a slut because she doesn’t want to be hit on at work? Get a life.
po-faced?
I agree with the sentiment of this bitch, but to call yourself ‘shawty’ at the end? Hmm. I don’t know if you’re quite attractive or just on an ego trip.
…maybe he feels sorry for you, sat there with a face like a smacked baby’s arse, thinking that everyone wants you…
Frosty I’m beginning to like your posts…….oddly. *nod*
And its true, some people are just social and enjoy chatting with people they see. It does NOT mean that they’re hitting on you or want to fuck you. Lots of local femmes have this problem thinking that any male who talks to them is just trying to bang them.
Whatever happened to conversation and chatting?
Yeah NGF, I agree.
I think there is a segment of the female population that think they are constantly being hit on when they are just being spoken to or chatted up. Were as ALL men think that when a woman is chatting to them they are trying to pick them up, male ego is funny that way.
also, a snotty bitchy receptionist on an ego trip? how old is that?
I love how women all wrapped up in themselves, think courtesy and being polite with manners is being hit on.
Drop your ego down a few notches and try again some other time.
et tu, Ng Phat, cheers
And it’s true…I would have thought Coast-reading females in particular would have more balls than indicated by what I’m reading on here…
It’s evolutionarily imperative for some guys to at least “take a shot”. You can blame “god(s)” or nature or fucking Wallace and his natural selection, who cares?
Female humans should just be glad we don’t spray them with urine, eat their parents or deliver worms to their nest, in our effort to mate!…fuck.
The funny part, is that girls always moan why guys can’t be ‘nicer’, but then, who do they always fuck?
Exxxxactly…
😉
Soo Im a receptionist and I see every delivery guy in town on a daily basis. they are all chatty, funny and like to banter back and forth. I would not be far off base to say that I’m at least attractive, and I do not for one second take any of this chatting as being hit on!
come on now!!
Im with Frosty and Fat, I hate stupid “I think I’m high class” bitches that take every single comment the wrong way!
If the delivery driver was female and said the same things what would you think then?
And even if they are flirting with you a little…..jesus, take it as a compliment, fuck, maybe he actually just thinks you’re pretty!!!
…..I really hate stupid chicks…..
Cheers to Fat and Frosty
And yet you hear so many people say they met their significant other through work.
my, my, aren’t we the golden cunted bitch.sheesh.better now than when you are 30 or so,and no one wants you, hey.
What a pompous fucking attitude. Enjoy the so-called “hits” ( probably in your feeble little mind alone), they’re probably the only ones you’ll ever get. I’m so fed up with stupid fucking bimbos on here complaining about guys hitting on them. STFU already. Who the hell cares? Delusional stupid princesses.
OP why not take a more practical/economic approach to this conundrum. Here’s what to do: take a stat sample of a few of these driver guys and ask them for a ball park figure how much they’d be willing to cough up cash-wise for the honor/pleasure of your company for an hour or so…
Then, compare that dollar amount to your current gig as a receptionist and voila, you might just find you’ve been in the wrong line of work all this time…
… OK… well me work is done early for the day today I guess… So it’s back to bed, with the knowing of a job well done and even helping out a young lass with her career problems… I think I’ll reward meself with a tug on the fantasy of a new $11/hr cally-girl….
Maybe The Coast can make a new section ‘Love the way we Brag’ for stuck up gals to bitch about the guys flirting with them/ hitting on them, as this is what she is doing, Bragging, not Bitching! I think if the OP all of a sudden found herself lacking in male attention she would be posting a different kind of bitch! And flirting is awesome…it makes my day if someone flirts with me!
hey there junebug,here is your flirt for the day. interested, contact me then. and we can see what happens.
HOw are people supposed to meet if not by talking to each other?
Assuming that he actually IS hitting on you OP, you can’t blame a guy for trying. Have you tried telling him you’re not interested?
But I doubt that’s the case. “Shawty” sounds like another stuck-up priss who thinks every guy wants in her pants.
Having worked as a receptionist in my youth, I can tell you how old this gets. And how effing Creepy it can get. Picture a 16 year old girl getting constantly hit on by 50 year old car salesmen… and please don’t mistake me for someone who thinks that they’re hot shit, because I absolutely do not, but there is a point where getting hit on every other minute of the day becomes insulting.
OP, “I’ve spoken with a few other receptionists…” Why don’t you try communicating your thoughts to he who offends? Do you think the other receptionists are going to fashion you with this necessary life skill? Speak for yourself. Stand up for yourself. Do it all without having an emotional meltdown then you may qualify as a grown up worth hitting on. Just chill out and fill your affirmation bucket with (unwanted) compliments knowing YOU own the hole… the whole thing.
You got to speak up, OP, instead of passively take this shit. Report incidents to your supervisor – he or she should be protecting you from such harrassment on the workplace.
TTFN, that’s exactly why I don’t hire passive people… they can’t handle dealing with the PUBLIC (delivery driver) for 4 minutes in a day without feeling all victimized. Get a coping skill, PLEASE.
I don’t know why women bother posting bitches like this here-it’s perfectly clear by now that not a single regular poster actually believes that a woman has a right to exist without being treated like a piece of meat. Why the hell am I or any other woman supposed to take it as a compliment when somebody shows me that they clearly don’t respect me as a human being or the fact that I am doing my job?
When I used to temp and delivery drivers would lean over the desk to look down my shirt, was I being a stuck up bitch when I would lean back so they couldn’t? When a man came into the office and told me I had ‘sexy eyes, and real nice legs too’, was I just being pompous to think he was being wholly inappropriate in MY workplace?
Are all of the OPs coworkers stuck up bitches too? Unwanted, unsolicited ‘compliments’ are not affirmation-they’re actually confirmation of the entitlement felt by so many to ‘put women in their place’-as objects.
I am sick and damn tired of being told that sexual harassment is my fault for simply existing in the world, and that it is my responsibility to tell every dick that I encounter that behaving in a way that nearly every employment contract clearly prohibits is not ok. Most women DO know the difference between casual chatting and flirting, appropriate or otherwise. Maybe if a few of you actually talked to one in real life instead of projecting all your weirdo misogyny on random women on the internet, you would know that.
Listen cupcake… It’s not that it’s a good thing when buddy comments on your legs. If you don’t want to accept it as a compliment then that’s your (foolish) prerogative. My issue is with women saying an uncomfortable thank you or passively giggling when what they mean to say, “hey buddy, if I wanted your opinion of my legs don’t you think I’d ask you for it? Sign here then piss off, fool” No, instead it’s sexual harassment and somebody else’s responsibility to articulate your thoughts for you? Fuck off. Get a coping skill.
Combat Baby – nobody hits on me I’m repulsive, a fucking Gargoyle has a better complexion…
They watch too much “The Office”
Actually Kay, I did tell him to back off-my point is that I shouldn’t have to (and I don’t know where you work, but telling someone who works with/for the company I do to ‘piss off’, even when they deserve it, is not typically considered professional). The only way I can accept shit like that as a compliment is if I accept that my main goal/purpose in life is to impress strange men, that as a woman, my value is purely as a sexual object. When I’m at WORK I act professionally-why exactly are these men not being held to the same standard? If I said some of the shit to customers or co-workers that certain men have said to me, me and my sexy legs would have been fired, and rightly so.
Maybe the reason the OP feels uncomfortable asserting herself or going to a manager is she fears she’ll get the same reaction she got here. Maybe she’s not willing to risk her job over somebody else’s bullshit unprofessional behaviour.
Also, never mind how messed up it is to actually believe that complaining about being made uncomfortable by some men’s lack of common sense and decency is “bragging”, how fucked up do you have to be to believe that any and all male attention, good or bad, is a compliment? That’s pathetic-never mind ‘getting a coping skill’, how about getting a real goal in life?
Why is everyone assuming that the delivery guys were “just being polite?” Were you there? The OP described them as hitting on her. Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t. But I think everyone jumping on the bandwagon of assuming the latter is kind of fucked. Does everyone here hate women and think they deserve whatever they get, always? And what is with this whole “women should stand up for themselves” thing? What’s going to happen then? Is the guy going to be like, “pardon me, kind madam! I did not realize my words betrayed me as a ruffian! hark, in yon future, mayhap I will hold my tongue!” Actually, it’s a choice between “hey, baby, nice legs” and “whatever, ugly bitch.” This has nothing to do with “complimenting” and everything to do with reminding women of their place in life.
Bro Tim hits the nail on the ‘ead when he quips:
“”And yet you hear so many people say they met their significant other through work.”‘
Eggs-actly, bro’.
Here’s what’s going on.
Under the oft-repeated mantra of “I dress the way I do for my OWN comfort”, each day 1 billion females get up in the morning and make themselves look as nice, and “attractive” as they can. The key is, they really are only interested in “attracting” a high-status male, or in a few cases, a male that “they” find attractive…
…and so the rest of us poor Shmos are exactly that, Shmos…and any attention WE give to these women becomes unwanted/harrasment/predatory and so and so forth, as you’ve read (repeatedly) here…
It really IS that simple folks, like it or not. Many females may not even realize it, but that’s exactly what they do…it’s natural for them to preen and puff themselves ONLY to “attract” (this includes already mated females, acting subconciously) the cream of the crop…
The sad part is, after shoving their décolletage in the faces of high-status, good-looking or VIP males….along comes me with a Puralator Box (perhaps filled with un-sold CDs) – my eye is naturally caught by said females ample cleavage (on display since that cute “and soooo funny!” lawyer was here)…
….and suddenly I’m fucking King Kong with his meaty and swollen priapism wogging from side to side as I can’t restrain my base emotions in the face of this ravishing beauty behind the help desk?!
That’s what you think?
Give me a break…and stop trying to turn everyday and common-place “flirting” (clumsy, or otherwise) into the fall of western civilation at the hands of ‘men’….you do a grave injust to the REAL victims of sexual assault by comparing their horrific experiences to your own trivial and trite disappointment that the lawyer ignored you, but the mail-boy thinks you’d be a good catch…
When I read shit from women like this thread, I almost prefer masturbation…
So, basically, when I dress up to go out and have a night on the town, or just put on a nice dress to have a walk to the park, I’m doing it exclusively to attract males – high status ones, at that? Even though I have a long term boyfriend who is hardly “high status” by your standards? Wow, I must be a real gold digging slut, as must all other women who take pride in their appearance. This is the logical conclusion of your statements. Are all women who are “taken” or simply uninterested in flirting (because, just maybe, they are AT WORK) supposed to leave the house unshowered and wearing grey sweatpants, lest they mislead some poor sap such as yourself into thinking they are on the prowl? Like that would make a difference, LOL.
When did the OP mention that her tits were falling out of her shirt? You’re constructing this with made-up details that support your narrative about temptresses who put all their “wares” on display, only to yank them away from “poor schmoes” such as yourself, even though they clearly “wanted” the attention. Can you tell me where any of this was spelled out in the bitch? Nice mental image about king kong with his swollen dick waving around, I’m pretty sure no one here was imagining that until you dredged it up out of your fevered imagination. Way to make everything About You, Bad Mr Frosty.
I can go around and around about this all day, so feel free to write as many overblown essays about teh bitchez as you want. You can have your thread about 4x4s though. Not exactly my area of expertise.
I’d have to kinda agree with Mr. Frosty….as a single lady I do dress up in hopes of attracting some male attention and I realize that naturally I’ll attract some unwanted attention of men but as long as the guys are polite and respectful about it…there’s nothing wrong with a glance and smile. If these delivery guys are smiling and flirting – I don’t see the problem, if they are leering and rude then call the company and complain or say something to them…the more women call men on rude behavior the sooner it will stop!
Of course some of dressing up has to do with looking attractive, and in most cases that translates to “attractive to men.” But there is nothing wrong with stating that you simply don’t want to be flirted with at work, whether it’s nice or creepy, period.
Then I suggest you counter-act a million years of evolution by putting up a sign, MR.
Maybe a picture of a cock with a red stripe through it?
Evolution? So first you’re angry because you feel you’re being characterized as an ape, i.e. a grunting animal. Now you are falling back on evolution as an excuse. You either get to be a human with the capacity for rational thought, or a grunting animal following its instincts. Make a choice.
Frosty, your argument is based on a generalizing, narrow, typically misogynistic view of women. How can you expect to be taken seriously with such drivel? You claim to know not only what we are thinking and how we feel but you also claim to know us better than we know ourselves, and if we protest, we are being “trivial and trite”. Meanwhile, you portray men as being ‘poor Shmos’, helpless and misunderstood victims at the hands of ruthless, materialistic, cock-teasing succubi. You have set it up in such a way that there is no reasoning with it because it is totally unreasonable.
As for the threat to use masturbation as a means to release your sexual frustration instead of hitting on women who don’t want your attention: Good Mr.Frosty, Good.
For men with reason:
1)
If you don’t make an effort to look “nice”, I find the women have more to say about it then the men, so dressing up is not necessarily about attracting men.
2)
When I went clubbing, I didn’t go to be picked up, so I wouldn’t dress up. I would wear jeans, a t-shirt and a ponytail. Imagine my surprise when I learned that it caused more men to hit on me than ever before.
I assume that when you say “we” you mean the royal “we”…as if womenkind was a monolithic block of like-minded vagina-bearing automatons waiting for you, HKM and MOLE to enlighten the world on their singular behavior?
You have already seen one poster who seems to be able to understand my point, and so you are no longer the “united voice” you think you are, are you?
Amd when suddenly faced with a bit of socio-biology, admittedly a very inexact “science”, you feel you are able to counter my brief description of one aspect of man/women ‘courtship’ by calling my ideas “misogynistic”, “frustrated” and “angry”? What are we, in Grade 11?
THAT’S one of the reasons that most people find it so hard to debate with 70’s-style ‘feminists’ – any suggestion one makes that “we are all in it together”, and are often unwillingly subject, even within ourselves, to base emotions and actions – things ingrained in our behaviour over hundreds of thousands of years…any suggestion that it’s anything other than the fault of “men”, is met with name-calling, mock outrage and false scorn, lol…
I called 50.4% of humanity “ruthless” and “cockteasing succubi” (cool word, btw) because I tried to (gently) explain a bit about human sexual selection on a forum that is more and more obviously populated with teenage drop-outs at worst, and chip-on-the shoulder undergrads at best?
Hey ‘girls’, if you want to debate socio-biology, sexual selection and evolution with ole fRosTy – I suggest you put down the “O” magazine, turn off “Ellen”, and pick up a book or two. I recommend starting with some basic Desmond Morris, bushwacking your was through Ridley’s “The Red Queen” and working up to a point where you can discuss male and female behaviours intelligently, based on the way things are, not what you wish they were…
😉
Start with “The Naked Ape” as a primer…
misogynistic … I so fucking hate that word. Get a bigger vocabulary. Not everybody and their dog hate all women, fuckface. Stop being so dramatic. I think you post that word every time you find guts to pipe up regardless of your handle, mosley or HKM or whatever you think you are today.
Fuck picking up a book, ladies. Go out there looking as nice as you want or as dressed down as you want. There will ALWAYS be a potential mate out there letting you know their availability to quench their sexual desires. See this after, oh I dunno, 1 year and you can accurately presume a lot about aggressive sexual behavior and make it work for ya rather than feeling all icky all the dam time. Everybody needs coping skills to this end whether they’re butt-ugly or drop-dead gorgeous. Or, are we all subject to the feelings others would impose on us? Again, get a coping skill. You get to choose how you feel. Always.
Maybe half the problem is that guys have openly admitted that they want to have sex with every girl, they can’t just be friends, if they talk to you it means they want sex. Before knowing this, girls could assume that guys being friendly really just meant they were being friendly, but now that it’s become common knowledge that all they want is sex from you, girls naturally have become more paranoid and exclusive about who they are friendly with.
And so while I think that most of the time the best way to play off a guy who is openly flirting with you at work is with a snappy comeback (since most of the time they’re just trying to get a rise out of you, and saying something back that indicates you know what they’re up to, and have a brain to back up the beauty, earns you more respect) I also agree with mosely that people should respect the professional attitude in the workplace.
Desmond Morris? That’s who wrote the bible you’re thumping? The zoologist who is considered a pseudo-scientist by his own peer group? The man who is so obsessed with his chimp’s, Congo, penis and how it compares to his, that he fails to notice that human kind, although still ruled to a degree by their limbic brain, can surpass their ape cousin’s primitive behaviour with the use of their much advanced neocortical brain. ‘The Naked Ape’ is a study in human behaviour from the perspective of a zoologist. It is only one small part in a whole series of studies into what it is to be human.
Maybe the problem here is that you (and yeah-yeah men like kay) do suffer from priapism–that the condition drains the blood from your neocortical brain to your penis causing you to lose the ability to reason intellectually–holistically. The women who are protesting obviously are not ruled by their limbic brain–they have risen above (or they are trying to) their more base drives in order to make their lives about more than eating, sleeping and fucking.
So, for you men who refuse to lift your knuckles off the ground and stand upright, go back to your jungle. We will call you when we have need to procreate. I mean, you are of no use to us after that anyway, as Morris noted. We have better things to do than guard against you eating the children and urinating all over the place.
men like kay? Actually, they do! LOL
LOL!
Kay, you’re a woman?!
Could have fooled me.
Oh wait, you did fool me with your eager to agree with ‘the man’ head nodding.
I’m one of the few bitches around here who is NOT confused about her gender, HKM. I’m also not confused on how to manage it, unlike you, the victim, and the OP.
We manage just fine, thank you.
Although, the narrow thinking, brain-washed, finger-pointing accusers (who, surprisingly, are often women) do make it more difficult for us. I mean, it is hard to get the most out of life when fearful and backwards people are always trying to put us on trial for being witches because we refuse to crouch timidly inside the box that built for us.
I especially note the drowning trial: if you are a witch and you don’t drown when they immerse you in water, then they must burn you at the stake. If you drown…oh, well, they were mistaken. C’est la vie.
Confusion can sometimes be healthy, Kay – you can run into as many problems when you’re certain about everything.
You know, I’ve seen plenty of “poor schmoes” in healthy relationships…for two reasons:
– the woman actually finds them attractive on all levels and wants to be with them, whether or not they have an ideal body type/wallet
– even if they’re not some idealized body type/wallet, their personality makes them attractive…a concept that seems inconceivable to many
Please stop imagining that life owes you anything.
Another point I’d like to make is that these men were not only hitting on the woman at her workplace but also at their own workplace. If I knew my employees were hitting on clients, on my dime, I would be pretty pissed. And if I were the OP I might consider calling and complaining to the drivers’ bosses. Believe it or not, some bosses actually care how their employees conduct themselves around the public and other companies’ workers.
See how easy it is to engage in this conversation without resorting to pseudo-scientific BS?
Golly-gee HKM, you can write a clear and to-the-point rebuttle like that, (I won’t try to defend Morris, he was just a suggestion as a place to start, clearly un-needed…although I disagree he is not respected by his peers) – but you can’t get your head around the fact that when men “hit on you” they are not “threatening” you?
If you often feel ‘threatened’ by an advance, clumsy or otherwise, that’s sometimes “YOUR” issue, not the man’s…
And my original point remains as valid and true as ever – despite your hysterical name-calling and ad-hominum attacks – and that is, that women only seem to be “offended” when hit upon by an undesirable male.
IF George Clooney/Brad Pitt (who-ever) hits on them, it becomes “ohhh, he stared at my arse…he’s a perve!”, but inside you’re just a ‘glowin’!
And you know that because you are all women.
Some great, even if a bit wrong, posts here…but no time to reply – gotta go down to Tim’s and scope the babes…
Kay – love your mettle!
Nice one.
…although you swear like a Cape Breton fishwife…can’t you be more “girly”
😉
What you are suggesting, Frosty, is dangerous. It is the assumption that ‘no’ really means ‘yes’ (the kind of rationalization that results in women getting raped.) I really do hope that I am misunderstanding you. But, you can understand my concern, I think.
Ok…maybe the delivery guys are a bunch of knuckle dragging perv’s that should be fired and sent to Miss Manners bootcamp…maybe the OP dresses like a skank to attract her married boss and gets offended when the delivery guys notice….maybe the delivery guys weren’t even flirting with her, just being friendly….maybe the OP is a drop-dead gorgeous women who wears turtlenecks, zero makeup and her hair tied back and still gets hit on all the time….jesus effin christ there are two sides to this story! And yeah, there are a lot of women I see that hooch it up to go to work to attract the big boss man but pull an attitude when the maintence guys hanging around the alley take notice….maybe it was presumptious for me to assume that the OP was one of them but there you have it!
So…back to the OP’s complaint = ):
It is quite cut and dry, I think. She is not expressing a feeling of being threatened. Nor is she looking down on the delivery men. It seems clear (at least, to me) that she is irritated that the men cannot respect that some women just want to do their jobs and not be distracted by the need for others to constantly play the mating game.
That said, there are acceptable, respectful ways to let a woman know that you like her that (do not disregard her personal/work space). I mean, as much as a person is pleased to know that they are liked, they are more pleased to know that they are respected.
“”And you know that because you are all women.””
?
I’m not poor and living in squalor, but I have strong opinions about that (it’s bad btw)…nor am I a “Christian” but I know a bit about how some of them think, I don’t have to be gay to understand the pain and vitriol of “love the sinner/hate the sin” and other such nonsense…
..So why suddenly must I have an XX chromosone to be able to study and try to understand human nature as regards females?
This is a fallacious and oft-used arguement by radical 70’s-style feminists to invalidate anything they don’t like hearing. “You’re not a women, so how would you know anything about them?” You can do better than that.
All that’s missing is the “nyaah nyaah!” at the end…
And HKM, I don’t mind a good spat online (in fact I thrive on them), I don’t even mind losing one (at least, I assume I won’t, when it happens :-)), and I don’t even mind being called childish names by angry peeps…
…but I DO ask one favour, please try not to stoop to the level you have, by completely fabricating things I have said or alluded to… that somehow MY ideas on man-woman human relations, including those ingrained and archaic things we do, are somehow “dangerous”, and “lead to rape”.
People reading these last few posts, while ignoring the first part of the thread, may not realize how far from the truth you are being…I haven’t said, or intimated ANYTHING about the ole “no means no”, and you know it. We are discussing “flirting” and “hitting on” someone in a public place.
That’s a low blow, besides being absolutely ridiculously untrue, and I KNOW you can do better…
HKM, you`re missing the point (again)…
(although I admit to temporarily thinking this was the “hiiii” at the supermarket thread)
Perhaps the delivery guy is just “testing the waters” to see if he can get any flirtation back. He’s not necessarily trying to mate right then and there. There is no need for, as you say, “a proper way to let her know he likes her”.
We’re talkinbg about some poor shmo taking his best shot here, in a line or two, aren’t we? Or did they OP say he was bringing her theatre tickets and a necklace??
It’s flirting, clumsy perhaps, but harmless…Maybe it’s the sullen, “quiet” guys you need to worry about! Sorry, bad joke…
Rightly or wrongly, in our society, this is something many men do. Perhaps you would prefer a sharia-law type society where men are polite to the women’s face (they HAVE to be), but believe me, they degrade them behind their backs?
Please, pleeeease, don’t make me review all your previous text to find the part that caused me wonder if you were suggesting ‘no means yes’ in some cases. Let’s just assume that I was reading you wrong. That way, if someone read you the same way, they are now clear that that wasn’t your meaning.
Frosty, you have mention the 70s twice and the credentials (or lack there of) of the people who are responding here. Just to be clear, I was 16 when 70s ended, which was about the same time I quit grade 10 to work full time as a waiter.
Speaking of waiters…
your waiter at Tim’s much have been very efficient for you to get back so soon. And, I see your ‘babe’ excursion was a bust…unless, of course, she is in the kitchen preparing your toad in the hole :).
Man! This mode of communication is so limited. You have also read me wrong. I have at no time during this exchange judged men as a whole, nor have I been angry or hysterical or bitter or whatever. Mostly, I thought, I was being matter of fact. In fact, I was smiling through much of it = ). How can I be judgmental of men as a whole when I have 4 brothers and a son who I can not imagine life without?
And, I stick by my original comment in regards to you, Frosty…
“I find your translation to text of the working of your mind deviously entertaining.”
Even if I sometimes I want to slap you upside your head = p
Enough with the poor schmo crap. No one is feeling sorry.
Accusing your opponent of “hating all men” is is a tried and true way of trying to portray her as some kind of hysterical feminazi. When in fact I think all we are advocating for here is for the people the OP mentioned to get with current professional social standards which have evolved somewhat in the last 50 years. Obviously the flirting was not harmless, unless you believe that certain people are not to be believed when they say something is discomfiting and undesired…that their silly ladybrains are making a mountain of a molehill.
As for my rhetorical comment about you needing to be a woman to know what women are thinking, well here’s how it is. You’re taking your personal observations about an unknown segment of females (people you’ve met? ordered coffee from? dated? imagined? seen on TV or read about in a book? who knows) and used that to justify making blanket statements about the behavior and thoughts of “women.” Even if you WERE a woman you couldn’t make those statements.
The only thing you can say for sure is that SOME women have such reactions to ugly men asking them out. If you don’t want me/women making statements to the effect of “all men=bad” (which BTW I never did) then maybe you should practice what you preach.
Ok obviously this is getting way out of control. All i was saying was that i wish when a courier came in he would kindly give me the package, and I would sign for it, maybe alittle chit chat about the weather, but dont ask me to sign your arm as an autograph, or tell me I forgot to fill out something on the slip and when i ask what tell me my phone number. Dont get me wrong not all couriers are like this but some of them are, and the minute you show them alittle attention they do tend to think that we may be interested and start to hang around more
It’s about time, Shorty! = )
Did he really ask you to autograph his arm? That’s very funny. I have never actually heard of that one being used before. I gather it was supposed to be a clever way to ask your name. = )
“”Obviously the flirting was not harmless, unless you believe that certain people are not to be believed when they say something is discomfiting and undesired””
And yet I’m pretty sure it was not intentionally so…
What is so “obvious” to you, is not so much, to me…
I’m somewhat “uncomfortable” with, and “undesirable” of, people asking me if I have 10 minutes to talk about Jesus Christ, but I am equally sure that they are not meaning to be threatening, and most prostylitizing is harmless…
And MR,
Let’s put the brake on grossly misquoting each other shall we? Where did I say that you (MR) were a “feminazi” (whose word is THAT? sounds like that windbag Rush Limbaugh, not me!), or imply that you “hate all men”!?
Btw, if, as you say, all my “experience” with the nature of human females comes from merely the “people you’ve met… ordered coffee from? dated? imagined? seen on TV or read about in a book?”” – that seems a pretty exhaustive source to me…what am I missing – women I’ve met on a flight to the moon?
I stand by my original point which is that women are “OK” with flirting and attention…but they want it always to be on THEIR terms, and that’s not always practical or possible in today’s complex world. If the OP feels needlessly “threatened” or is inconvenienced by the unwanted yet harmless ‘advances’ of a few young men during her work-day, may I be so bold as to suggest that perhaps “receptionist” is not the right career choice?
And yeah, HKM, I was hoping you’d take the bait on my use of the word “hysteria” which, I believe, has it’s roots in the same lexicon as “misogynist”, lol…something to do with a wymmyn’s ‘bits’…
From that scourge of modern educators, Googly:
“”Since ancient times women considered to be suffering from “hysteria” would sometimes undergo “pelvic massage” — manual stimulation of the anterior wall of the vagina by the doctor until the patient experienced ” hysterical paroxysm”.
Just thought I might be able to help, that’s all…
And you’re right, struck out at Tim’s – I thought women liked middle-aged men with thinning pony-tails with enough hutzpah to stay drunk in the day….Oh well.
🙁
I actually noted your use of hysteria, but I didn’t have the energy to pursue it :).
“I thought women liked middle-aged men with thinning pony-tails with enough hutzpah to stay drunk in the day.”
Well, if they knew that you were intimately acquainted with Morris’s “The Clitoris, the U-spot, the G-spot, and the A-spot”, I am sure things would have been different.
I was born much much too soon… “I’m ‘hysterical’ all the dam time, good looking, rich, young doctor. Please describe ‘paroxysm’ and snap it up, would ya?” LOL
Gotta love 30-something. Just wait, OP. Once you grow up you’ll qualify as mean old bitch only hard men would dare approach or you’ll have mastered testosterone in such a way all will see you as graceful and kind if not rip-roaring sexy and, of course, still try to pick you up.
Take what you like. Leave what you don’t. But be girl.
“Take what you like. Leave what you don’t.”
Now you’re talking, Kay = )
“trying to portray her as some kind of hysterical feminazi” does not equal “you called her a feminazi.” It’s my words, not yours. Also, you don’t get very far past ‘radical 70s style feminist’ before you arrive at ‘feminazi.’
“that seems a pretty exhaustive source to me”
Except that women on TV are actors and women in books are imaginary. As are women who are imaginary. At some point you have to look at why every woman in your life seems to be a money grubbing shallow bitch, and ask yourself is it them or you.
“and that’s not always practical or possible in today’s complex world.”
We’re not talking about today’s complex world. We’re talking about the workplace. Can we get back to discussing the original bitch and have less of the “women always…” statements?
But yeah, what you say sounds pretty reasonable. She should totally quit her job and find a whole new vocation all because some guys can’t behave like mature adults while they are at her and their workplaces.
See, everything you’re saying is contradicting what you said about women wanting flirting to always be on their own terms. “She should quit her job if she doesn’t like it” caters exclusively to the men in the situation. And in my experience, when I decline men who are flirting, I’m treated as if I’m cold or uptight, or in extreme cases, insulted and harrassed. So if anyone wants everything to be on their terms, it’s hardly only women.
Mole Rat, where do you get your energy! You are like a superhero fighting the good fight! I am left down the road still wheezily try to suck air back into my lungs 🙂
That said, you reminded me about something I meant to say awhile back…
Floyd…
you’re an idiot.
Who brings up prostitution to a woman who is annoyed by men who are trying to pick her up at work.
You just keep on tuggin’. It will save our daughters the headache of having to deal with your sons in the future.
“women in books are imaginary.”
?
Not in the books I read, perhaps in yours they are…I’m not a big fan of Harliquin romances, or spy thrillers, bless your heart. I do enjoy reading evolutionary biology however, it’s a favourite hobby of mine…
Now we have some more info from the OP, we see that indeed there was no “threatening” or “intimidation” leading to rape, degradation and the end of civilization…just a few clumsy passes by some guys in shorts carrying boxes…
Again, in professions where one has to regularly deal with a cross-section of the public, it DOES help to be a little thick-skinned at times…a professional receptionist is no exception. THAT was (clearly) my point.
Sounds to me like the OP is doing just fine, and doesn’t feel “threatened” after all; she is just a little annoyed at times. Not sure where you came up with me saying “she should just quit her job”…Read my post again, this time with both eyes… 😉
It does feel, MR, a bit like you’re debating me with someone else’s position in mind…and re-hashing old arguements that you’ve used before?
Finally, you say:
“” if anyone wants everything to be on their terms, it’s hardly only women…””
Correct.
Frosty, I just noticed your photo change. Is that the bathroom at Tim Horton’s? No wonder you didn’t score a babe yesterday!
“If the OP feels needlessly “threatened” or is inconvenienced by the unwanted yet harmless ‘advances’ of a few young men during her work-day, may I be so bold as to suggest that perhaps “receptionist” is not the right career choice?”
I’m not sure how else to interpret that, as it’s clearly what is being implied.
And I don’t recall saying that the OP felt “threatened.” I did say that the flirting wasn’t harmless, which doesn’t necessarily equal out to it being “threatening.”
HKM, the answer to your question is that I have too much time on my hands!
BTW Frosty you may be talking to me like a some kind of condescending smooth dude right now but I remember your bizarre diatribe earlier in the thread about women shoving their tits in the faces of lawyers and only giving successful men the time of day. Which pretty much read as “you got dressed up, it’s clearly only for us, so it’s open season.” Ignoring the fact that there are dress codes in offices – many women would not keep their jobs if they didn’t look presentable – which brings me back to my point about professionalism which you are steadily ignoring.
“Bizarre diatribe”? “Women shoving their tits”?? “open season”???
I believe, MR, that the term I used was “décolletage”…but if misquoting me as having used language like “shoving their tits”, somehow makes you feel more empowered, far be it for me to correct you…I leave that to your own conscience…
MR, you can continue to stomp your feet and throw your toys from the crib all you want, lol…but it doesn’t change the fact that harmless flirting, is exactly that, whether it be clumsy or not – and that many women are only “offended” when that flirting comes from a low-status male.
Reading your posts, we now see that you are not only “made uncomfortable” by men making “advances”, but also by the presence of both religious, AND non-religious people as well. (Are we missing anyone else here?) That rather leads one to beg the question –
– Any chance it’s not them, it’s you?
😉
Welcome to “SUCKER SHOWCASE” with your host baD mR fRosTy!
Looks like we’ve got a audience ready to play, so we return to our game already in progress.
Mole Rat, I assume that you are referring to the very vivid images that Frosty cleverly created to cast men who pursue women sexually as victims:
Bizarre Diatribe:
“The sad part is, after shoving their décolletage in the faces of high-status, good-looking or VIP males….along comes me with a Puralator Box…eye is naturally caught by said females ample cleavage (on display since that cute “and soooo funny!” lawyer was here)…and suddenly I’m fucking King Kong with his meaty and swollen priapism wogging from side to side as I can’t restrain my base emotions in the face of this ravishing beauty behind the help desk?!”
The condescending smooth dude part, I presume:
-And my original point remains as valid and true as ever and that is, that women only seem to be “offended” when hit upon by an undesirable male.
-my original point which is that women are “OK” with flirting and attention…but they want it always to be on THEIR terms, and that’s not always practical or possible in today’s complex world;
-in professions where one has to regularly deal with a cross-section of the public, it DOES help to be a little thick-skinned at times…a professional receptionist is no exception. THAT was (clearly) my point.
And, all the other points:
–I tried to (gently) explain a bit about human sexual selection
-they really are only interested in “attracting” a high-status male, or in a few cases, a male that “they” find attractive;
-Many females may not even realize it, but that’s exactly what they do…it’s natural for them to preen and puff themselves ONLY to “attract”
-“ohhh, he stared at my arse…he’s a perve!”, but inside you’re just a ‘glowin’!
-I called 50.4% of humanity “ruthless” and “cockteasing succubi”
-We’re talking about some poor shmo taking his best shot here, in a line or two, aren’t we?
-Rightly or wrongly, in our society, this is something many men do.
-There is no need for…”a proper way to let her know he likes her”.
–discuss male and female behaviours intelligently, based on the way things are, not what you wish they were.
Yeah, I know, Frosty, I am being a bit of bitch throwing your words back at you, but I know you can take it = )
Not at all, HKM. Although somewhat unsure of the point in doing so, (?), my love of reading my own work in unabridged form is surpassed only by my admirable level of humility whilst writing it… 🙂
No need to explain further; I’ve read your rebuttles, scratched my head at some, nodded at others, and un-bookmarked this tired old thread –
– some moron is on another thread actually condemning a professional driver for keeping his passengers safe on a Metro bus….you must click over and have a look, it’s rather sad, really, to see MT drivers get such grief from Haligonians before the facts are in. I think there are still folks angry and upset that a driver made light of their silly ( not to mention in poor taste) seal-hunt “protest”…although he DID make amends in some of their eyes by later topping himself…there ya go…
I guess if I was quoting you and not paraphrasing I might have used actual quotes, oops!
No, actually I’m not made uncomfortable by men making advances – depending on the man! Ohh! You got me! I have standards! So sorry. It would also depend on the situation. Such as if I’m at work. Still ignoring my point, but that’s cool.
As for religious/non-religious people (actually, the distinction was religious/athiest; non-religious doesn’t have to mean athiest), yeah, like many, I kind of get annoyed when people try to shove their personal beliefs in my face like I care about it.
fair enough…
Lately, A few of my friends (including my folks even) are more comfortable with the term “nontheist…I guess “atheist” is being made a dirty word…like “liberal…who knows…
Yeah right…clicked over, saw 90 comments so far. Even if I had the head to read them all, I cannot image what would be left to say on the subject. Unless I play devil’s advocate, of course, but I will leave that to the pros (your a natural at pushing buttons :). Besides, I praised bus drivers last week (in the love section, I think), so I would hardly be convincing.