Recently I went to a store having a BOGO on footwear. I didn’t realize it was buy one get one, so when my boyfriend brought his shoes to the counter, the clerk informed us of the sale, and I grabbed a pair that were $4 more than his. I told the clerk mine were more expensive so he would know to charge us the amount for that pair.
He gave me a look and said something along the lines of, “Women, always have to go for the most expensive!” And I laughed along, which I regetted immediately afterward. I knew he was only trying to be cute and funny and harmless. It seems like such a minor thing to him, to make fun of my entire gender for spending $4 more than my boyfriend. I don’t know if he actually believes that tired, stupid cliche, but he certainly has no objections to voicing it to paying customers (one who wasn’t even going to get anything until I heard it was essentially free). He doesn’t mind having strangers think that he believes that.
If I walked into KFC with black skin, ZERO cashiers would laugh and say, “Oh, of course you want to eat here!” because that’s judging an entire race on a stupid stereotype, which is incredibly wrong. Why is it still okay to do that with women?
This may seem like a very minor thing to many people. I probably come off as being easily offended, a delicate flower. But it’s jarring to realize that people do think these things about me just because I’m a woman. I don’t want strangers to think it’s okay to voice “funny” sweeping assumptions to my face. I am more than just a woman; I am an individual. Please take that into account next time, and every time, with every woman and man you see. <b>–The Next Step
This article appears in May 2-8, 2013.
he immortal words of Marge Simpson – “It’s true, but you shouldn’t say it.”
Even Emily Pankhust could occasionally be exasperated by her sisters in the struggle
http://www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=2…
In all seriousness, that’s not the kind of banter a cashier should be engaging in unless a)You know the customer extremely well or b) You are able to make it very obvious that you are parodying the cliche, not the group. Sounds like neither was the case here. So, I’ll grant that you are perhaps a teeny bit over-sensitive; but buddy also stepped a tad over the line.
HMV is pretty fucked. I agree they won’t last much longer.
Uh.. I’m sorry. This is an HR issue. Would you have not emailed the store’s manager if he had inserted the word “black/asian/jew/homosexual” in its place?
email the store manager already!
First, women having expensive tastes is not a cliché. Second, neither is “black people liking KFC”. You are an idiot, and a racist, OB.
Wait! If you “… knew he was only trying to be cute and funny and harmless”, then why bitch?
Really? You women are ALWAYS being overly sensitive… I reference the Real Housewives (of any city) as proof.
Now… back to the kitchen with ya’ll – suppertime is fast approaching and we men are hungry…
^^ so that means you do NOT have an erection at this moment mr meaty?
1. Yes, it sucks.
2. Can you think of any gender/race/group that doesn’t have some negative stereotype?
3. I’m not sure even the positive stereotypes are all that great either, since they obviously alienate at least some in the collective group.
Agree with Meaty (except he can make his own supper). And kudos to Harper for stating the obvious….OP your comment about KFC was horrible! Shame on you for even thinking that this is even remotely close to what you are calling cliche. Women love shoes and are damned proud of it. Who gives a fuck about $4? The cashier was just making small talk. If you didn’t like his attempt at humour you could have just said something at the time. Get a life!
Meh. Should have piped up. Typical woman, cringing and agreeable, even when insulted. See what I did th-*punched by girlfriend*
I’m torn. On the one hand, the sales guy was a dope, but on the other there are many many cliches that make men look like dumbasses (it’s seemingly in vogue these days to bash men for being dumb)… doesn’t make either legit, but I don’t think women are getting persecuted with these types of cliches any more than men are.
Also, I think the KFC thing isn’t really a fair analogy to this situation. I don’t think OB’s racist, but I think her comparison is like comparing apples and oranges.
Sensitive much. There is hardly a day that goes by that someone doesn’t hear a woman go on about how cute the shoes/tops/dress/boots or whatever and what they got them for. So what? It’s in the DNA. And OB, talking about cheap, the only reason you got anything was those shoes cost you only $4.00 and I guess the HST of a whopping 60 cents. It could have been worse, he could have called you a cheap bitch.
Confession: I tend to pick the most expensive shoes… Arrrg
Nurse as long as you can afford them, go for it. Now do yo gush over them with your girlfriends?
it’s not in my dna, timothy. i like trucks and knives^^
We need No_fool to weigh in on this one. She’s a black woman so for her the stakes are high.
No Molly, I doubt Meaty has an erection, this bitch is about the ladies.
lol reg, you haven’t heard the saying?
“men have two emotions, horny & hungry, so if you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich”
^^^molly this reminds me of aplay on the call me maybe song that I found hilarious “Hey, I just fucked you and this is crazy…but there’s the kitchen…sandwich maybe”
Folks, in all seriousness… we ALL put out foot into our mouths at inappropriate times.
I once greeted a guy I know – and see rarely – with: “I’m so glad to see you; I’ll never see you again!” I meant to say, “I never see you”. He has prostate cancer…
And no boners… sorry ya’ll!
^^ so you must have a sandwich in your hand at the moment. ummmm instead of something else.
“I probably come off as being easily offended” – You’re way past probably. That’s an awfully long diatribe for what amounted to a $4.60 pair of shoes. It’s like when a comedian tells a really offensive joke and people laugh at first and then are like aw man that’s racist/offensive/dirty whatever. You laugh first, you can’t come back later and say it’s offensive. Going on the information provided I think the comment by the cashier was intended to get a laugh out of your bf, which it probably did.
Of course other groups (races, sexual preferences etc..) have negative stereotypes but if that shopkeep had brought up one of them, even in lighthearted parody, he would have had his ass fired.
How come it’s ok to poke fun at some, but others are protected?
That’s fucking nonsense. It’s either all ok or none of it is ok.
Quite frankly i think it’s all ok. But you can’t say some is ok and some isn’t because that, THAT makes you look like a prejudiced dick. Deciding what physical appearance warrants kid gloves and what one doesn’t.
I agree with the bitch. It’s not about being easily offended, it’s about expecting professional service. And this is coming from someone who is a big advocate for people not being so damn sensitive about everything, still a valid bitch.
And black people and fried chicken is a stereotype, as is women and spending too much on shoes. Both are potentially offensive stereotypes that target a whole group of people who have no control over the fact that they belong to said group. I think it’s a valid comparrison. It’s just that for some reason making stereotypical comments about women (and men, as PK mentioned) seems to much more socially acceptable than making similar comments about racial or ethnic groups. That’s the point OP is trying to make and those that barked at her for making that comparrison help prove that point.