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To the nutty chick who was cracking her gum in the library: grow the fuck up! I asked you politely to stop and you defied me and kept on chewing your cud. I complained about you and I have in the past. I WILL, if I can, have you bounced from the place. We WILL speak again. Count on it. —MGP
This article appears in Jun 21-27, 2012.
18 Comments
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mgp, do you really think that you can get this chick bounced. don’t bet on it. if some people here lately are right, there is a three ring circus in most of the libraries. yeah, you can try, but don’t hold your hand on your ass for any positive results.
Every time she snaps…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_6CZ2JaEuc…
Ooooh gum snapping! One of the more annoying habits of some. And in a library? if she does it again, smack her in the side of the head with the hardcover version of “Rise and Fall of the Third Reich” fourth reprint. It’s what you call “library justice”.
and if that don’t do it, let me know, and i’ll get my 5 year old grand daughter to come sit by her. that kid can fart at the drop of a hat, and stink, holy fuck that kids ass is rotten.she makes halifax harbor cesspool smell like roses, seriously.
She sounds constipated, suckers.
If you’re farting that easily and it smells REALLY bad, there’s likely a lot of fecal matter in her large intestines. And you don’t have to *feel* constipated to be constipated.
She probably could benefit from an enema to clean things out.
“She probably could benefit from an enema to clean things out.”
You say a lot of really strange shit PK.
I imagine the summits are an interesting experience. You got the dim witted people trying to figure out how to use forks, you’re at one end talking about cum play and enemas, tommy is grunting and smashing things, and Ivan is drinking scotch even though its not even mid-day yet (like a boss). I would assume everyone else is just sitting there trying to make sense of the situation without being able to look at linked pictures to understand what to laugh at.
I KNEW IT! ‘Zilla IS one of us. Fess up Brendon. Now is the time to come to Jesus, Brah.
Cheese and rice I mentioned ‘cum play’ in silliness ONCE you fucking lizard.
Go fuck someone’s mom and get off my case, jerkface!
well you’re not entirely wrong…
it is usually just rambling banter.
http://www.roflcat.com/images/cats/pulp-ch…
Hey now! I have no problem with you being a freak in the sack PK. You like enemas and being frosted like a cake….different strokes for different folks.
“Go fuck someone’s mom and get off my case, jerkface!”
I won’t bother describing the perverse things your mother and I did last night, but I can see where you get your freak from.
she is far from being constipated. she goes on a very regular basis. just that they stink so bad. but look at it this way. if they could be canned or otherwise sealed up, they would be a great terrorist item to have and use.
Maybe you can have her charged with a hate crime too. Keep fighting crime Libraryman!
You are correct Zilla, except Tommy growls more than he grunts. I just sit there and stuff a hard Benny in my mouth and drink Sprite. PK also likes to be a condiment chemist.
They DEFIED YOU? How DARE they!? Get over yourself are you the queen of the library? Also if nobody will make the offensive gum snapper stfu, the really awesome thing about libraries is you can *GASP* take the books home with you where I presume the only disturbance you will suffer is the mewing of your 12 cats and the ringing of your phone. Hahaha just kidding on that last one!
“I just sit there and stuff a hard Benny in my mouth”
http://static2.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/commen…
Your link didn’t work, this narrows down your true age in the 40-99 range.
it did work before but sadly that website is a bitch when it comes to direct linking to gifs. You saw the humor though….the gif was of the guy from doctor who smiling. It was intended to imply what you said was humorously sexual.
It hurts that you age me like that. I’m probably pretty close to your age.
The liberry is a big place, go find a quiet corner or check your shit out and go home buttmunch