It’s been 9 months since you gave birth to our first child, and I thought you would have been able to get back to your pre-pregnant weight by now. When we were on vacation last month in Mexico, I was a bit embarrassed to be with you. Our friends’ wives all lost the weight quickly through exercise and yoga, but you’ve gotten lazier and have resorted to snacking. Please, for the sake of our sex life (which has been practically dead for the past year), work on that weight. If anything, summer is coming and I would love to be at the beach with our new son and you without feeling like I am nursing a beached whale. —New Body Needed
This article appears in Apr 28 – May 4, 2011.
This is a fake bitch, and a cheesy effort.
It HAS to be.
No one would come on here and write such trash and expect to have a validated point.
If by some miracle this is legit, can the OB spell A-S-S-H-O-L-E.
Someone wanted to get a rise but clearly has no imagination.
Trolly McTrolly.
Would you like lies with that?
OB, you’re a douche bag.
You clearly have no idea how post-pregnancy horomones affect a woman both physically and emotionally. Raising children is hard work. You try pushing a beachball through a hole the size of a walnut…when that happens you then get a say on how easy or hard it is to get back in shape after a pregnancy. Until then, shut it.
How about you help and support your wife in raising your son instead of being a superficial ass.
It’s a fake, salsasue.
Move on, guys. Nothing to see here.
I’m sure there are idiots out there who really do expect the mothers of their children to bounce back to pre-pregnancy shape after a few weeks of giving birth, but this one reads like such a formula. It’s too robotic to be real!
http://www.prwatch.org/files/images/pants_…
Assuming its a fake OB is still a douche.
meh, i’m actually on board with this Bitch. As a pretty (read: very) fit dude, it would really kill my relationship if my wife made no effort to be attractive.
There’s a difference, veloce, between not making an effort to being attractive to just having a kid and having to deal with breast feeding, massive changes in your body, taking care of an infant, etc….
You’re a douche, veloce, if you’d ridicule your wife/gf/SO for not getting back into shap asap after having your child.
I have no prob with her weight, and neither do any of my hockey team. AND she loooooves strutting her stuff at the poker table. Why don’t you give her some cash, she always has to well, strip, since we don’t take debit.
I may be a douche, but at least I’ve got a hot wife.
if this ain’t a fake bitch, this dude ought to taken out and fucking strung up by the balls. let’s see you have the next one, asshole.
…and that’ll last forever, veloce. What the fuck is going to happen when you ‘beautiful people’ get old? Are you going to tighten up your saggy ol’ junk with a nail gun or spend thousands in plastic surgery to look like a perfectly preserved waxy cadaver?
Aw, I know this bitch is fake but I like to take a jab or two anyhoo.
Buy her a gym pass and drive her to the gym. While you’re waiting for her to do her session(s) you can hang out at the local watering hole. No big deal.
Yeah, veloce, what are you planning on doing when she gets old and ends up looking like an old bag?
Beauty fades, and if that’s all your relationship is based on, well, I pity you.
The guy sounds sexually frustrated. Maybe head on downtown some Saturday evening….just tell the wife you’re heading out with the guys to a sports game.
=====I may be a douche, but at least I’ve got a hot wife.=====
lol’d
Sure you do.
The Coast Crew love telling people who look good that they will be unhappy eventually.
it doesn’t matter, i have magic hands
Hot, like this?
http://i415.photobucket.com/albums/pp237/x…
Or this?
http://mycanceradvisor.com/wp-content/uplo…
————————–
New Body Needed – http://thequarterlifechronicles.files.word…
Too bad you aren’t as concerned for her health, as you are with appearances.
number two ✔
Hay, Cranky, no one around here’s ever told ME I’ll eventually end up unhappy 😉
oh snapz.
Dude, if this is real, learn some TACT.
OB’S not a douche…
he’s a P-I-G… PIG! (Animal House)
If it’s real the guy’s a spineless, self-serving, waste of his father’s seed! If it’s not real OB’s an idiotic, inattentive, ingrate for even thinking in this manner and a waste of LTWWB’s time. Women don’t instantly bounce back after a pregnancy you asshole! How about thinking to keep your dick in your pants next time? Ever hear of a condom, dummy? It’s obvious you don’t love her!
Why am I posting all of this… to give the OB attention? NO! …because I’m a fucking prick and I like it!! Let the flames begin!!!!
“Maybe head on downtown some Saturday evening….just tell the wife you’re heading out with the guys to a sports game.”
L.M.A.O.
I doubt he’s looking for shit-dick.
Hmmmmmm…..I wonder why my friends with “hot” wives are either divorced, seperated, or fucking around on them?
Give me someone I can carry on an intelligent conversation with, has a good sense of morality, and
has strong independent character ( being easy on the eyes is just an added bonus, but not how they are defined).
Really OB, wouldn’t you rather the mother of your children be made of better stock than you, because you are obviously a shallow, self centred individual… and these offspring will need someone to develop them into well adjusted, accepting , tolerant people.
I assure you this Bitch was not made by me, I just happen to agree with it.
It’s so easy to let oneself go these days, the majority of the population is lazy as shit, and gives no thought to their health. Look around yourself right now, 99% chance your next to a content out of shape person. Even on this board, you’re all defended the out of shape lady. While this is fine for most people, others aspire for more. This does NOT make me a shallow, self centred individual.
I admire people who put in the effort to be physically in shape, eat healthy etc. If that is the kind of lifestyle I live, and my wife “use” to live, I would try to steer her back to it.
The one cork in this Bitch however is that the chick was just pregnant. A little bit of slack needs to be given in that circumstance. But it is not unheard of for a women to give birth, and then proceed to get back in shape.
Look around yourself right now, 99% chance you’re next to a person using improper grammar.
Fake because no one would really be so shallow and heartless toward the mother of their child – I hope.
You DO realize, veloce that a person’s “appearance” can be deceiving, right?
I know plenty of people who are thin but eat like shit, drink, smoke and basically abuse themselves. Many of them can’t even walk up two flights of stairs without getting out of breath. I also know people who are a bit bigger, but exercise, eat well and take care of themselves and can run distances. Just by looking at someone, you have no idea whether they’re healthy or not. For some people, it’s hard as hell to lose weight, even if they’re doing everything right. And that’s especially true the older you get.
So fuck off with your self righteous bullshit. It takes a full 18 months (that’s right 18 months) for a woman to recover from pregnancy/childbirth/etc…, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with still having some baby weight 9 months after giving birth. Especially if she had a c-section. It took me about 8 months to recover from the last surgery I had, and it was relatively uninvasive compared to having your uterus cut into. And add in having to take care of a helpless infant and see how fast YOU’D lose those extra 20-30-40 pounds.
I agree that there are so many lazy people out there, however there are those of us who do go to the gym and who do eat strict, healthy diets and who do take care of themselves, but have a harder time losing weight and staying at a healthy weight. I’m one of them. I’ve had periods where I was working out 4-5 times a week and eating 1200 cals and i still gained weight. I do know plenty of larger people who eat like shit, but I also have quite a few friends who do eat well and are not skinny. And you know what? I’d rather fuck someone who had a little meat on them than a bag of bones.
And i’d rather someone with a hot face and a little extra weight than a fucking butterface skinny bitch.
If all of a person’s ‘good looking’ friends are cheating douches, you may want to consider getting more friends or finding an entire new set.
And who says good looking people can’t be nice and/or smart? LTWWB is taking a sad turn towards CH feedback…
No one’s saying that. Everyone says *I’m* nice and smart 🙂 heehee
All we’re reacting to is the arrogance of someone who’s all “I’m soooooooooo hot” or “my wife is sooooooooooo hot”…. yeah, of course you’re not going to admit to marrying a dog.
The OP does come off as a bit of a douche, but I think most people can see where he’s coming from, even if they don’t want to admit it.
Where did you get this “18 months” figure, Pretty Kitty? My wife was back to her pre-pregnancy weight within about 5 months both times she gave birth to our sons. With absolutely no pressure from me I should add. She was just really keen to feel fit and healthy again. Mind you she only gained about 30 pounds each time, and she also did a lot of mom and baby yoga.
Sure, new moms need to be cut some slack, but 18 months? C’mon – that’s just an excuse, in IMO.
I got that figure from a medical text book as well as a biology professor at the university level. A woman might get back to their original weight sooner, but physically, their body is not fully recovered from the trauma of pregnancy/birth/etc… until 18 months after they give birth. A friend of mine who is working on her second medical speciality (first specialty is in internal medicine) confirmed this.
But, I’m sure you know much better than the medical experts, Jesse. 😉
Also: if OP’s wife (well, pretend wife because this bitch is fake) hadn’t given birth, I’d be able to sympathize with him, but bitching at the person who gave birth to your child because she doesn’t get your rocks off because she’s too busy looking after your child (esp after what she went through to grow and give birth to your child) and it hasn’t even been a year… yeah, I don’t really see how that’s reasonable.
Sounds like OP’s a bit of a narcissit, to be honest.
*narcissist, even 😛
I’m not claiming to know better than medical experts. I’m just telling you what I’ve lived through. Twice.
You kinda are. You stated that because of your experience with ONE person, you’re in a position to judge that the 18 month figure, a documented medical fact, is bogus and an excuse for laziness.
Buuuut nice job backpeddling 😉
In this thread: angry fat people.
Phhht. The Angriest!
http://arago4.tnw.utwente.nl/stonedead/sil…
I was a bit skeptical about your 18 months figure, so I emailed my friend who’s a doc. Mind you he practices emergency medicine, not obstetrics. Still, he has a medical degree. He says there’s absolutely no one set number (i.e. 18 months) for recovery from childbirth. He says every woman is different, and recovery depends largely on her pre-pregnancy condition. Women who are in great shape before conceiving will recover a whole lot faster than women who aren’t.
Again, I’m just going by what I know. My wife had lost all the weight by about five months, and was back to running after about six months. Looking around to our group of friends (we all have kids around the same age) I can honestly say the girls were all back to their “normal” weight and activity levels waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay before 18 months. But again, these were all fit and active women to begin with. In fact, many of them are actually slimmer than they were before kids. Gotta love breastfeeding and chasing after busy toddlers!
Jesse, you have 1 wife or at most (from what you say) 2 to draw from … soooo… you see where I’m going right.
Ok, here’s my stance (the only right stance! *sarcasm whale, thar she blows*) … if your wife is sitting around eating stupid stuff becoming a tubz, then I do not think it is unfair of you to encourage her to get active or perhaps discuess with her why she letting “her former beauty go”. For you to demand that she look hot again or be attractive instantly is quite unfair on your part. Who knows she may be struggling through multiple issues post pregnancy, be it hormonal or depression etc etc. and your stank attitude isn’t helping.
Now, different people as PK pointed out have have different body types and some ppl cannot lose weight that quickly etc. If it appears that she isn’t eating nonsense and is maintaining the same level of activity as before but still not losing weight it could be that her body (metabolism for example) has changed since pregnancy.
OP I suggest you take a long hard look at your wife over the next few months. Look past the outside and see what really ails her.
well, I know I’d be pretty depressed too if I had to be married to someone like OP or veloce and one of two things can happen when you’re depressed: either you gain weight by eating too much OR you lose weight from not eating.
I could understand if OP was concerned about his wife and why she might be slipping into bad habits (maybe she’s depressed, maybe she’s exhausted and could use some extra help, maybe she’s just in a rut and feels so bad about how she looks she doesn’t care anymore because her self esteem is shot, maybe it is hormonal or metabolic….?), but he just seems concerned about what her appearance is doing to HIM. Doesn’t sound like a very loving, supportive husband to me. If he was any sort of a man, he’d sit down with her, express his concerns and promise to do whatever he can to help her help herself.
But no, he comes on here and bitches about how his new-mom-wife is too fat to arouse him anymore and is embarrassed of what she’ll look like on the beach. Maybe the non-existant sex life, OP is an indication that your wife IS depressed or really doesn’t like the way she looks and is embarrassed herself, and doesn’t know what to do? If you really loved her, you’d man up and show some support instead of trashing her on here.
Kinda like PK said: he doesn’t seem at all concerned with his wife (fake or otherwise), and is only concerned with the effect this has on him. So, she’s put on some weight. Big deal. It happens. Her horomones (which affect metabolism and so much more in the body) have been out of whack for months now – even if she is maintaining the same eating habits and levels of activity as before pregnancy it may be 10 times more difficult (thanks to the horomones) to drop the extra weight. Perhaps if OB has an ounce of compassion and respect for his wife he’d try to be helful and supportive instead of an ignoramus.
EXACTLY. That’s it! I get that people are attracted to certain things and it’s not a bad thing at all. I know, for instance, I’m just not attracted to skinny guys. And some guys aren’t attracted to skinny girls, and some aren’t attracted to larger girls and vice verse. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a preference. We can’t control who we’re attracted to and who we aren’t. BUT, there’s a huge difference between that and being an asshole when the person you claim to love may be going through a tough time.
And the whole “our sex life is dead” part tipped me off that there’s likely something deeper than just OP’s wife being a lazy slob. And if some random on an anonymous internet board can pick up on that….
My wife lost all her baby wight plus 2 lbs in 3-4 months.
I have no doubt it can be done, but it’s difficult when you dont just bounce back after you’ve given birth.
Women tend to tell other women these things, but not so much their male friends — sometimes after you give birth things can happen that set your weight loss back. A friend of mine busted her bladder when she gave birth and had a hard time with that (it’s kind of hard to focus on working out and weight loss when you can’t stand up without peeing yourself. Another friend had post partum depression and had absolutely no energy to do anything for a good year after she gave birth because she refused to take medication because she breast fed until her baby was a year old. Another women had to have a c-section which became infected and ended up on IV antibiotics for months because the infection kept coming back.
And if your baby has any sort of medical problems — well that can be taxing as well. Or if the baby doesn’t sleep. It’s kind of hard to get the energy up to go exercise when you’re exhausted because you’re up all day and all night with a screaming infant. A friend of mine had a baby last year and he had acid reflux as well sleeping issues and she hardly got more than two hours sleep at night. She wasn’t eating because the baby was always feeding and her husband would have to spoon feed her when he got home from work. She still didn’t have success losing the weight because she’s the type that has to exercise to make it happen.
I know a lot of women who do bounce back right away. A friend of mine was back at her pre-birth weight in a matter of weeks.
It’s just a lot of variables at play, and the last thing a new mother needs is the father of her new baby on her ass because he doesn’t find her sexually attractive because hay, sometimes it takes a while for a woman to want to have sex after they’ve given birth, and until men pass something the size of a small watermelon out of a hole the size of their asshole, well, they can just stfu.
I dunno, I’ll probly take some heat for this but here goes:
First off, I agree that OB is an asshole. Or at least really comes off as one. I always hate reading bitches that shouldn’t be bitches, these OBs need to grow a pair and confront the subject of their bitch.
But here’s the part I’ll probably take heat for as start a whole new debate on a whole other topic, as has been my trademark thus far lol.
Most men don’t want to get married. MOST of the time it is the woman that puts pressure on the man to pop the question and settle down and start a family. Not always but most of the time. Yes much of the time it can be the other way around, but women want to get married more than men do, they talk about it and dream about since they are little girls. Men typically don’t think about it until they start hearing the hints from their girlfriend, or until they realize they’re getting old. Typically.
Now that the OB’s wife has gotten what she wants, a ring and a baby, she’s taking him for granted in my eyes by letting herself go. Yes I understand that it’s difficult, but she’s lazing around and making poor eating choices. I would be more sympathetic, and maybe OB would too, if she was putting in a little more effort. I don’t want to get married myself because I’d rather be appreciated than needed. I don’t believe in letting people get too comfortable. I want to stick around because I want to stick around, not because I made a promise years ago, not because if I leave I’ll potentially lose half my shit, not for any other reason than “I love you and I want to be with you because you make me happy”. But that’s not what we’re talking about.
Why is when women are sexually frustrated they seem to get more sympathy? Why is it when men become frustrated we’re a bunch of insensitive pigs.
I understand that losing weight, especially after having a baby is hard, but dammit so is being tied to one woman for the rest of your life, especially an increasingly unattractive one.
By lazing around and getting fat she is saying that she doesn’t care about his physical needs. If she was doing yoga and exercising and eating right and was still a little on the heavy side, I would agree with what most of you are saying that he’s being a complete superficial D-Bag (and I do agree to some extent.) I just truly feel it is disrespectful and ignorant to let yourself go when someone has to sleep with you and only you for the rest of their lives. Many women completely transform, and I’m not talking physically but attitude-wise, once they become mothers. It’s as if they got what they needed from the man and don’t care about him anymore. They got their baby, what does it matter if we have sex anymore?
It’s like this: looks matter to men. Things like compassion, personality, generosity, support, those things matter more to women.
So women, ask yourself if your man became a less supportive, generous, loving person after you had a baby, you’d be really disappointed right? You’d also be put off if we gained a bunch of weight and didn’t do anything about it, even though looks are supposedly not as important to the fairer sex.
So why shouldn’t it upset us that you become much less attractive and fun to be around after childbirth?
I understand that looks fade and everyone should accept that, but the thing is that his wife is not putting any EFFORT into it. We can deal with some extra weight and your skin being a little looser and what not after some years goes by and you have kids, but it’s when you become a fat lazy couch potato that I for one would feel taken for granted.
That being said the OB should ask himself why he got married, if it was for looks than he’s an idiot and should probably just leave her now if that’s the only reason he was with her. Either way he should grow some balls and talk to her and offer a solution and not just bitch. I’d have a lot more sympathy for him if this bitch wasn’t so centered around him. He doesn’t seem to be truly worried about his wife, more about himself.
Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa last time I checked men got old, fat and saggy and unattractive too. So this argument goes both ways tommy boy. You’re a young grass hopper we forgive you, hahaha.
“but women want to get married more than men do, they talk about it and dream
about since they are little girls.” … never have I done that. I aways dreamt of the cake … cause I like cake but that’s about it.
If you think women want to be tied down as well … you’re wrong.
Ah I see where you talk about the ugly men … but I skipped that like I skipped pages in The Da Vinci code …
Whatever man. That’s all I have to say about this post.
Frivolous things are frivolous.
I don’t ever want to be married. I never want to feel like I’m stuck with someone, or financially dependent because divorces are expensives. That is definitely not my thing.
The OP is definitely an asshole for caring so much about what other people think of him (he’s embarassed to go to the beach with his wife because of how she looks??).
BUT, the whole sex thing is partly why I think I would be ok with my man sleeping with other women if he followed a few guidelines (i.e was safe, put me first, didn’t flaunt it, etc.). I can completely understand why a woman who just gave birth wouldn’t want to have sex right away, but why should her husband/SO suffer? I can’t imagine there being a time when I wasn’t up for sex, but if that did happen, I would want my SO to be sexually satisfied to keep our relationship strong.
And I KNOW from past debates, this is not a popular opinion at all (PK, I know you totally disagree with me).
Women’s bodies are “designed” for bearing children and everything that goes with it. That whole supermodel stick figure thing is an unnatural cultural “innovation”.
If you love the woman OP cut her some slack.
“…but why should her husband/SO suffer” … Lolz wut? No boo. If I just gave birth to your bb you are required to wait for me until I feel fine (within reason of course)! Um um um there is no getting off easy here. I am worth the wait … you will wait (that might seem unreasonable, but I deserve that much). Now would I express this to my SO. No, I wouldn’t. You are a free agent in the world do as you wish, and I will act accordingly.
You know I share your opinion (somewhat) on this … but I’m speaking somewhere down the line … ie midlife crisis. I would expect understanding, patience and the ability to refrain from instant gratification from a SO. I cannot demand those things but suggest them through my actions and the respect I hold for myself.
I was of course speaking in general terms. I don’t think all women want to get married and I don’t think that no men want to get married, it’s just culturally pushed on women more.
Like I said, many women talk about their weddings from the age of 5, when their male counterparts are playing with GI Joes or whatever. It’s evolutionary too, women are programmed to want to settle down because it is in their best interest to be with someone long-term if they have a kid with them.
Many of them are raised to believe that having a family should be an important goal. Men too, but not as much. Bottom line is a lot of guys do get a raw deal (this is a fact, look it up) because they enter into a marriage for the wrong reasons, one of those reasons often being pressure from the woman.
My point was that wanting your partner to put in some effort into the body that you have to look at and have sex with for the rest of your life, isn’t 100% superficial, it is valid. Women have a hard time wrapping their head around this sometimes because looks aren’t typically as important to them. But if something that was important to them (I used some examples but it could be anything) were to drastically change they’d be upset too. But they should be supportive, unlike the OB. Just because we want our life partner to be attractive to us doesn’t make us superficial in my mind. But the reasons that the OB offer like being embarrassed to be around her at the beach are a little superficial, although understandable. He just comes off as such a dick in this bitch. Again, if he demonstrated more concern for HER, I might take his side.
Me0w! Where ye at?
I need your opinion.
You think physical fitness and attractiveness are frivolous Donk? You don’t think that being content being fat and unattractive, when you have a spouse who has to stay married to you, is inconsiderate to say the least?
Do you think good sex is frivolous? I need good sex to be a happy guy, perios. I can’t have good sex with an out of shape person. I’m not the most fit guy on earth but I try my best to eat well and exercise because I believe that that says a lot about my self-esteem. Lol these 2 deserve each other, they both sound like lazy douches.
sometimes in life thomas, you must play the hand you’re dealt, some things you can fix others not so much. is perios a new sexual term? heehaw
lol na, I meant period, I caught that too but I’m sure you knew what I meant. And although I definitely agree that you gotta play the cards you’re dealt, when you apply that philosophy to personal fitness, that makes you lazy. Yes some people no matter what will never have a 6 pack, yes some people can eat McDonalds every day and not gain a pound, but dammit you’re ultimately responsible for your weight and if you want to be fat and alone, fine. But when you have a life partner you owe it to them to stay in decent shape, at least make an effort to. Once you get a certain age I might stop caring about appearance as much but when you’re relatively young and still have a sex drive, weight and appearance is important. To me, anyway. I also believe if you can’t manage your health and appearance that says a lot about your priorities and self-worth. I’ll stop trolling now
It doesn’t really matter what I think … for this is a topic that occupies little space in my world. It needs no discussion in my mind because as I meet you is as I expect you to be save pregnancy, depressive states etc. Obviously I do think to a certain extent it is inconsiderate … read previous post (or did you skip lines like me) :
I do not however like (?) how you can speak so fluently about a sex of which you are opposite. I purport not to know about the male sex. They just are. The magnification of minutia just makes people insecure and serves to further divide the sexes. I only know about the goings on of my mind … but I do suspect you fancy yourself a thinker, so bravo (not sarcasm, some of us are lamenters, others are not).
I will say though that there are some nasty looking mugs out there … on both sides.
Ah, just leave me alone.
… and no, I am not fat, or “out of shape” … funny how beauty standards change. Ah well.
fair enough donk. Gender relations and roles are just something that kind of fascinates me. I may come off as chauvinistic or sexist, I just call it how I see it. I don’t think men are better or worse than women, good people period are hard to find. And I don’t profess to know how women or men or anyone but myself thinks, I was just making cultural remarks, certain things are culturally expected of/by the 2 sexes. Never said you were out of shape.
Oh, fucking bloody hell, Tommy, really? REALLY?
It is glaringly obvious from the unabashed level of chauvinism and naivete in your posts that you are very young. My guess is that you are barely into your twenties, so from there I can also surmise that the longest sexual relationship you’ve ever had has been with the palm of your hand. I can almost forgive you, because it’s quite obvious that you lack experience in both life and love.
Shit, there is so much utter ridiculousness in your previous posts, it’s hard to know where to begin. “I may come off as chauvinistic or sexist” -Gee, ya think?!?
“Bottom line is a lot of guys do get a raw deal (this is a fact, look it up)” Holy shit, this seriously makes me LOL. (googling the scientific study on how men get fucked over by marriage-crazed women as we speak)
“Women have a hard time wrapping their head around this sometimes because looks aren’t typically as important to them.” -BAHAHAHAHAHA! I’m sorry, but no. Women can be just as shallow as men, and looks are pretty important for most of us. The difference is though, women in our society are not inundated with highly sexualized images of the “Ideal Man” at anywhere near the level that we all see images of the “Ideal Woman”, and so there’s not such a ridiculous physical standard that men are held to. We want to you to look hot too, but we’re not going to make you feel like a piece of shit because you’ve put on a couple of pounds, especially after you’ve gone through something as life changing and physically demanding as, oh, I don’t know, CARRYING ANOTHER LIFE FORM INSIDE YOU FOR 9 MONTHS AND SQUEEZING IT OUT OF YOUR VAGINA.
“women want to get married more than men do, they talk about it and dream about since they are little girls” -Oh hello there, did you just step out of a time machine from the 1950s? Last I checked, modern women had moved a bit beyond dreaming for Prince Charming to come along and sweep them off their feet. Sure, many women expect to get married at some point. Considering it’s a cultural norm, most adults, men and women, see the possibility of marriage somewhere in their future. However, for most people, those futures also contain lots of other things like education, career, travel, etc. Very few well-adjusted women see marriage as the be all and end all of their lives, and are certainly not out scheming to trap men into marriage so they can pop out babies and get fat.
“Now that the OB’s wife has gotten what she wants, a ring and a baby” -Oh, how fucking selfless of him to donate his sperm so she can fulfill her baby-making fantasy!!! This may be hard to grasp, but in MATURE, healthy relationships, people get married and have babies because they both want to. You don’t GIVE a woman marriage and a baby, those are commitments you enter into together. Only a coward and liar would get married and produce a child unless he was actually sincerely committed to both.
“I understand that losing weight, especially after having a baby is hard, but dammit so is being tied to one woman for the rest of your life, especially an increasingly unattractive one.” -Oh fucking please. ‘Wah wah, monogamy is sooo hard.’ Then don’t fucking get married, dummy. Newsflash: women have no desire to be tied to some selfish asshole either. You think you understand that losing weight after pregnancy is hard? For some women, it’s damn near impossible. Perhaps if she already had a consistent fitness routine pre-pregnancy, had no complications in either the pregnancy or the birth, and is in a loving relationship with a partner who supports her (which, btw, OB is obviously not).
Even then she’s still dealing with fluctuating hormones, which can easily contribute to fatigue, mood-swings, and self-esteem issues. She could be breast-feeding, which means she literally still has another life who is reliant on her body for sustenance. She’s probably getting minimal sleep getting up with the baby all night and early in the morning, not to mention caring for the baby all day as a new mother learning the ropes, changing shitty diapers, making food, doing laundry, cleaning the house, etc, etc. But she should totes be able to fit some spinning classes in there somewhere right???
Honestly, for all you, the OB, or any of us know, she could also be suffering from post-partum depression and in need of love and support and possibly counselling to help her get back on her feet and feeling like herself again. It’s super great for all the hubbies on this thread chiming in with how quickly their wives were able to lose the baby weight because, as we all know, ALL WOMEN ARE EXACTLY THE SAME.
But hey, you’re right, fellas, she’s probably just a lazy selfish bitch who wants to torture her husband by getting fat and withholding sex. I mean, really, who really gives a fuck if your wife is ACTUALLY healthy or feels good about herself, as long as she’s skinny and ready to bone, am I right????
Would your responses change at all if the “pregnant” card wasn’t dealt?
IE. I am in shape, healthy, and try my best to look nice for my wife. But recently she has turned into a lazy overweight pig, and does nothing to better herself. I am finding myself less attracted to her. What should I do bitchers?
I have to agree with Veloce…to a certain degree. I mean, you have to be attracted to your partner. Granted for me, I can become more attracted to, or not attracted to a person at all once I get to know them, but it’s kind of hard to be with someone who repulses you. BUT, the fact is, the OB’s wife just gave birth… you definitely need to be given a little leeway after that.
I’m a big girl, and I can totally understand that I’m not everyone’s idea of “hot”, but I’m working on my weight for me, not so I can be someone elses idea of attractive. But, just an FYI Tommy, big girls can still have crazy good sex, so don’t make that assumption.
Donk- I thought about what you said, and yeah if I just had someones baby I would be pretty hurt if they didn’t want to have sex with me and go somewhere else because of it. But, I just think throughout a relationship I’d be ok with the man sleeping with other women… as long as my needs, both emotionally and physically, were always met.
I dont’ think I’m making much sense this morning, my mind is all over the place LOL
Reading all the comments, while just coming from a page about multiple wives in Islam.
I wonder if the OB, would have less of a problem if he had a wife to take to the beach ??
Or would his life be truely compromised with the possibility of having to deal with multiple wives facing weight gain in his eyes ~;p
Veloce – calling your wife “a lazy overweight pig” on an anonymous internet forum? What an incredible catch you are. A real class act. Boy, is she ever lucky to have you!
What should you do, you ask? Well, besides the obvious “go fuck yourself, asshole”, I would suggest that you go to your wife and tell her that you’re a shallow, unsupportive piece of shit who likes to talk trash about her to strangers and that it would probably be in her best interest to get as far away from your degrading ass as quickly as humanly possible.
It was a theoretical question you clueless twit
… but you’re still a moron.
Actually, you leaking douchebag, for it to be a theoretical question, it would have to seek a hypothesis. But that’s okay, you utter moron, you can keep using big words if it makes you feel better, and you can consider my response “hypothetical”.
You’re calling veloce a moron…I thought that was the insult you assholes had given to me ?!?
name calling,it really hurts you kno…L O L ROTF….sorry couldn’t remain serious.
no you’re more-on
see
I don’t even…
Go back and read my post, you’ll see that I was just posing a question. Wondering if everyone was taking the pissed-off stance because of the fact the woman was recently pregnant.
Trust me, that isn’t my situation at all. Why you so mad.
no no it’s
Y U SO MAD
Google image “Y U So”
haha
I’m not mad at all. I’m just expressing a point of view. This is the interwebz – not to be taken seriously. Troll on.
lol I knew I’d take some heat.
I agree meOw. What you didn’t address though is that the wife isn’t trying to keep her weight under control, according to OB. On the other hand he probably hasn’t mentioned anything to her, so maybe she’s not even aware how it’s effecting him. I would just feel a little taken for granted, that’s all. No one like to see their partner laze around and get fat, male or female.
I know weight loss is very hard, especially after childbirth, so yeah I agree he should cut her some slack, it really doesn’t sound like he truly loves her but when you’re sexually frustrated you can say some pretty harsh things. Act like you’ve never criticized a guy’s sex skills, or said things you didn’t mean because you and your partner’s sex life hadn’t been up to snuff.
“I understand that losing weight, especially after having a baby is hard, but dammit so is being tied to one woman for the rest of your life, especially an increasingly unattractive one.” -Oh fucking please. ‘Wah wah, monogamy is sooo hard.’ Then don’t fucking get married, dummy. Newsflash: women have no desire to be tied to some selfish asshole either.
You’re really going to downplay how difficult marriage is? Especially the new parents part of it? And I’m immature?
I dunno, it seems like you’re totally unwilling to see the man’s side of things. This bugs me, it seems that every time a man complains about something women want to invalidate it and paint us as insensitive brutes. Not so much the other way around.
This guy has promised his life to this woman, I don’t think it’s too much ask that she start exercising and eating right, 9 months after childbirth, all this talk about how easy or hard it is to lose the baby weight is irrelevant because she’s not trying. For all we know she could lose the weight very easily. If she is suffering from depression or whatever she should communicate that, not just sit around and let herself sink into deeper depression and make the problem worse, this is a marriage we’re talking about here. I don’t want to raise an infant in a dysfunctional marriage. This really is a lot of men’s big fear, that their wife stops caring about sex after she becomes a mom. How would you feel if your SO all the sudden didn’t seem attracted to you or care how attractive they are to you. That would make me feel taken for granted.
Look if I was in this situation, I would try to have that difficult convo with my hypothetical wife in a supportive way. I would encourage her to life a healthier life and help her in whatever way I could. I would have genuine concern for her, not just myself and my hormones.
“This may be hard to grasp, but in MATURE, healthy relationships, people get married and have babies because they both want to.”
That’s true, but who’s to say how mature and healthy anyone’s relationship is? I know I’d never submit to a woman’s pressures to get married unless I wanted to but that’s not the case for a lot of guys. We don’t know.
Yes it’s difficult, and the OB should be much more supportive instead of bitching to ppls he doesn’t know. It sounds to me like he shouldn’t have gotten married.
No, we’re not in th 1950s but if you think that 50 years of progressive, modern thinking offsets millions of years of evolution you’re dreaming.
I generalized, yes, but I said that it is not always the case.
This guy hasn’t had a good sex life with his wife in over a year.. you gotta admit that sucks no matter whose side you’re on here.
I’m sure we all agree that he shouldn’t submit this anonymously, but it is a very difficult conversation to have with anyone, male or female.
And give me a fucking break Me0w. There are tons of baby crazy women out there, who see men as a means to this end. Just like many men take advantage of women for various reasons.
Again, people these days are as morally devoid and selfish as they have ever been. OB sounds like a douche bag so I can only imagine the kind of woman who would marry him, like I say, they deserve each other, they’re both lazy and avoid difficult situations/conversations. If he was a real man he’d have talked to her by now, if she was a real woman and cared about their marriage, she would have told him how she was feeling if she was suffering in any way. Closed mouths don’t get fed
And if you’re gonna say “monogamy is so difficult, wah wah, then don’t get married”
One could counter with
“losing weight after childbirth is so hard, wah, wah, then don’t have kids”
Both those things sound incredibly insensitive, do you agree?
Point taken, PF. I have heard that about big girls. I wasn’t even referring to big girls, but people who are out of shape. My ex wasn’t big by any stretch of the imagination, but she’d get winded after about 15 mins of sex (and after she climaxed) and give me the hurry up and finish eyes, often just giving up if I took what she considered to be too long. Huge turn off, and screams selfishness, nothing worse than a selfish lover.
Hay! Why don’t we take all the fat women out there, make them wear a big fat letter “F” and then burn them at the stake.
Because OBVIOUSLY there’s nothing worse than being a fat chick, and it’s proposterous to think a fat chick is desirable to anyone, can actually have decent sex OR might actually be worth treating like an actual person.
For FUCK SAKES.
Also, tommy: weight is not always an indicator of endurance, be it being able to walk up a long flight of stairs, go for a run on a treadmill or be able to have great sex. There are also thin people who can’t do the same. I have a friend who’s actually a tad bit underweight and can hardly do 10 minutes on a treadmill. Just because someone is thin, doesn’t mean they’re healthy, and vice verse. I’m not tiny by any stretch of the imagination, but I work out multiple times a week and am actually quite fit cadio-wise and I’m quite happy with my endurance. I probably eat better than Veloce, too. But no, because I haven’t reached an “ideal” weight (hay, I’m perfectly happy being at the weight I am, to be honest — I feel great and am perfectly healthy), I must be a lazy slob who sits on her ass all day and eats pie.
PS: I just read your last post, tommy and I get where you’re coming from now, but my point still stands in general 🙂
I’m in the boonies right now and while i really want to respond my only source of Internet is my iPhone, which is far more effort than this thread is worth. I will say that I am definitely not hating on men or relying on a double standard. My point is that the woman who just gave birth to your child deserves your love and support, fat or thin, for better or worse. That’s what marriage is all about. Support, love, working thru it. Not criticizing and posting mean shit on the internet. Anyone who gets married and has kids and thinks it’s gonna be nothing but sexytimes and rainbows has no one to blame but themselves when they’re miserable.
No PF, whatever floats your boat, I really don’t mean to say that fat people are any worse or better than anyone, or more or less attractive, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Good on you for being active. But the OB’s wife is not. We’re not talking about someone who is putting in effort to be healthy, we’re talking about someone who has sunken into a snacking and lazing phase and, from what I gather, is perfectly content to do so.
I agree 100000% that weight/figure is not always an indication of health. You can kind of tell how healthy someone’s lifestyle is by looking at them, skin and complexion are a big indicator as well. That’s besides the point though.
I just don’t think anyone can look at me and tell me with a straight face that they wouldn’t be a little put off if their SO gained a large amount of weight and didn’t seem interested in getting in shape. It is to be expected after pregnancy, but the only person who can lose the weight is you. If she really wanted to she’d be making an effort. Again, all the talk about how difficult it is is irrelevant, the OB is upset because she doesn’t seem to care about her looks/weight/attractiveness, and thus their sex life. I would be upset too, but I really would like to think I wouldn’t be as much of a dick about it as OB.
Yes if I marry you I’ll always love you no matter what, but that doesn’t mean you should push the limits of that. And love and sex are two different things. He never said he didn’t love her, just that he was finding her unattractive.
Like, I can be a dick sometimes but just because a woman made vows to be with me forever doesn’t mean I’m not going to put effort into the relationship to keep her as satisfied as possible, I put a lot into my relationships and expect the same back.
Yes, over the course of life people’s weight fluctuates, especially when you add a kid to the equation, but you should put the effort in to maintain a sex life that both of you enjoy, if you care about your partner. If this means staying in shape I really don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect your SO to stay in decent shape. Relationships are hard work.
No one ever feels sorry for men, like going through a pregnancy isn’t hard for us too. Like going through this life and body changing experience is just a walk in the park for us. I know hardened criminals who have been to prison and witnessed unspeakable things, who say childbirth was the scariest thing they’ve ever seen. We’re always the bad guy in the situation. For all we know the OB’s wife really is a lazy slob, who wanted him for nothing more than a baby. But I’m the bad guy for pointing that out. We don’t know! To me it’s not too far of a stretch, like I said, why else would anyone marry this shallow prick? lol the OB’s wife might be a selfish bitch, but he’s no day at the beach either. He showed no kind of compassion, he didn’t say anything like “I appreciate what you put yourself through to deliver my son and carry on my bloodline and turn us into a family, but I’m concerned about our sex life and your emotional and physical state” People aren’t perfect though and often are afraid to speak until they can’t take it anymore (ever tried telling a woman she’s getting noticeably heavier?) and the result is a bitch like this. I really hope this guy isn’t as much of an asshole as he sounds, because I feel sorry for him and hie wife, and also his child.
But I definitely entertain the distinct possibility that this is a fake bitch meant to piss off women, mothers and fat people. Seems to have worked.
I agree with Me0w’s last post 100% I have stated from the get go that OB should be more supportive and less selfish, but so should his wife. It’s a two way street. No one thinks marriage is going to be all sexy fun time but a year of infrequent and unsatisfying sex is hell for anyone, especially when leaving isn’t really an option.
You probably eat better than me? What the fuck are you trying to get on my case for?
205 lbs with a Body Fat Percentage that is currently 9%. What were you saying about my inferior diet again? fatty.
Meow…I think what you just posted May 4/11 @ 2:09PM about ‘married’ couples is really the way it should be for anyone in a relationship…I see no reason a piece of paper or the mumblings of some religious orders representitive should in any way take precidence.
“No one ever feels sorry for men” you want a cake? I gots 2 you can has one!
^.^
I’m glad you felt you had to justify yourself, veloce.
I’m not trying to start a pissing contest here — I was trying to make a point. I’ve lost quite a bit of weight in the past while, and my body fat percentage has gone wayyyy down, but I still have a ways to go. So despite not being skinny at the moment, my diet is impeccable, given that it is a medically supervised diet for my type one diabetes. Sure I splurge one day a month, but for the other 29 days, every calorie, carb and fat gram and gram of protein that’s put into my body is counted and accounted for. My exercise regime is impeccable and OH HAY, I can actually run distances on a treadmill, despite being, in your words, veloce, a “fatty.”
You can’t judge people on appearances alone, and according to my last doc visit to discuss routine test results, I’m the picture of health. Again, despite being a “fatty.”
And I’m just wondering… why is it always so contemptable when it’s the woman who can’t have sex for whatever reason (she’s just given birth, lost her sex drive from post partum depression, etc…), but never is when, let’s say, a man is impotent and can’t have sex (and yes, viagra and its competitors don’t work for every man) women can never complain about that because you’re shit on a shoe for bitching when your man has a medical condition.
Well guess what? Lack of libido because of post partum depression, or hormonal imbalance, or the like is just as medical as impotency.
Just because a woman doesn’t have to get anything “up” to have sex, doesn’t mean she’s physically or mentally capable of doing so. And I mean hay, some cases of impotency and the ability to achieve and sustain an erection is mental too.
So, it goes both ways.
PK, based on my past relationships I categorically disagree with your last post. Women are not above complaining when a man can’t or doesn’t want to have sex for whatever reason, quite the opposite. It’s a huge double standard in our society. Women often flip out when they are denied sex, medical condition or not. Men do that and they could be charged with the kind of crimes that require you to go door to door and tell everyone your sex offender status.
A friend of mine denied his ex gf’s sexual advances and told her to leave and what did she do? Called the cops and said that HE tried to rape HER. I don’t think all women are that crazy but our society enables and sometimes encourages them to be.
If OB’s wife was the one who was about to explode from lack of sex she could easily be just as much of a dickwad as he is. This guy has been bottled up for about a year, and his wife gave birth 9 months ago. That means that for the last 18 months he’s been going through the pregnancy/chilbirth/raising an infant stage. He just wants to get his rocks off. Is that really such an insensitive demand? Sex is important! Then again, he could be doing a lot more to make her feel sexy, but she isn’t putting in much effort either.
Donk-you kill me.
tommyjules…. what you just wrote is IMO why prostitution & extra marital affairs are so prevalant !
There’s always the vast amount of internet pr0n. 😛
Tommy — I think sex is important too in a relationship, don’t get me wrong — so much so that I think it’s important to find a partner who’s has roughly the same sex drive as you (I have friends who’s sex drive doesn’t match their partner’s and there’s a lot of discontent there), but, there are times where you just have to be understanding.
That being said, there are many ways of getting your “rocks off” by yourself (without cheating). I’m sure if OP were to end up with erectile dysfunction, his wife would, hopefully, be understanding, just as the expectation would be that he would be understanding of the fact that she’s just not into it right now. It’s only been 9 months. It goes on for more than a year or so, THEN make a stink about it, but some women just aren’t ready for sex again for a long time after becoming a new mom. Sure there are women who’s hormonal levels change so much after having a child that they just don’t desire sex anymore and/or their sex drive drastically changes, and I can understand how OP is sexually frustrated, but instead of trashing his wife and getting angry, he should look for solutions rather than just saying she’s a fat slob who won’t fuck him anymore.
Pk, you have any nudes? You sound hot
Agreed PK, I knew we were roughly on the same page all along. But to suggest that he should just go jerk off is a little insensitive in my mind. I’m sure he has been. Also to suggest that he should wait another 3 months or so, to me is insensitive and a tad unrealistic. He should open his mouth and stop waiting around, imo. If she TELLS him she’s not ready for whatever reason, the fine, but he should try to bring it up, as difficult as that might be. This is why I don’t want to get married or have kids. lol “Many ways” he can get his rocks off by himself? I only know of one, personally, but please, do go on..
no Donk I don’t want a cake I just want our society and culture to start depicting men as human beings with every bit as many feelings, insecurities and life challenges as women. We express our frustrations in different ways and different things make us tick, but that doesn’t make our issues or feelings any less valid.
He should be understanding but so should she. I think she could just as well address the issue if she wanted to.
One word, tommy: fleshlight. LOL.
I agree that he should stop being a fucking pussy and bring it up. Maybe he has, though, and she’s given him perfectly reasonable explanations and he’s still been a jerk about it?
Who knows — maybe she had an episiotomy and something went wrong and it’s just uncomfortable for her. Or maybe while pushing she damaged her bladder and it’s uncomfortable and painful to just ‘be.’ As someone who’s had her fair share of bladder and kidney infections, the LAST thing I want to think about is having sex when my bladder and kidneys feel like they’re on fire. And I’m not really in the mood to watch my diet or go running on a treadmill when I’m sick, either.
And maybe she’s uncomfortable sharing that, as OP doesn’t seem like the most sensitive guy on the planet. But who knows: if he opened up those lines of communications he’d find out why this shit is going on with his wife.
Also, veloce: you wish 😉 heehee
… ’twas but a joke Sir, but that’s ok, PF and I will eat the cake!
I offer cake (for reals)… & you talk about our culture. Downer! unless… pondering hipster is pondering? Ok ok I’ll stop.
lol fair enough Donk.. fair enough. It’s funny because I’m sure we all get the wrong impressions about each other on here. I only comment on things I feel stongly about so forgive me if I seem a bit (lol) of a blowhard, just something I feel strongly about. I’ll take that cake now.
you are starting to get it young thomas…all are welcome. ouat i made cakes with my magic hands
And Tommy, our Painey still makes cookies @ pine tree killing season. Darn good ‘uns, if I do say so meself. >: )
Exactly, what pg said. 😀
hahahaha fleshlight, that scene from Zach and Miri make a porno comes to mind. “I’m like McGuyver, give a paper clip and two elastics, I’ll figure out a way to fuck it”
Zach & Miri make a porno is in my top 5 fave movies!!
lol we share some interests, eh PF. I haven’t watched Shottas yet, the one I downloaded was french :P. I love Kevin Smith movies, I’ve seen em all multiple times. I love how me mixes cutesy romantic shit with the vulgar and grotesque. Z&M was the perfect example.
OB is jus pissed cause the kid ain’t his
The song Jay & Silent Bob sing in “Jay and Silent Bob Strike back” is one of my ringtones lol…
Yeah you’ll definitely need and english version of Shottas… I watched it with subtitles for the first few times!! I own it, and have probably seen it over 20 times… I know it by heart now.
Is that the “who smokes the blunts? we smokes the blunts” that one? lol I gotta get that.
and PK,
Yes those things are all possibilities. She also could possibly just be a lazy, selfish bitch. It’s all speculation. When I go back and read the bitch, it’s just the last sentence that really wreaks of douche-ism. Until that point it wasn’t all warm and fuzzy, but it’s a bitch, it wasn’t so bad until the beached whale remark but he really is frustrated, obviously. He didn’t expect her to look like Wonder Woman after 2 weeks, he just said “Please, for the sake of our sex life, work on that weight”
He just wants her to work on it, and if she cares, she will. But closed mouths do no get fed. Another bitch that should have been a real life conversation, but somewhat valid BASED ON THE INFO WE HAVE (yes she could be x y z, but we don’t know).
Anyone think I’m an asshole? Just curious.
No, I don’t think you’re an asshole….
… just a little young and naive, LOL
You’ll learn.
Men on here are a bunch of assholes, that should have no opinion on this subject. F U…all of you. You guys grow bald eventually which is very unatractive!
nose and ear hair is grosser^^
The movie ZACK and Miri… ROCKS!
I say see if we can find the OB/OP (or whatever the fuck you call it), we bind him in chains and cut him into little pieces (starting with his nuts), grind him up and make him into coyote burgers. Least he’d be useful that way. Stay dry this week everyone.