To all you asshole idiots that park your shopping carts right in the middle of the aisle and then have the audacity to give me a dirty look when I say “Excuse me”, Fuck You! You’re the one stupid enough to leave your cart smack dab in the middle of the aisle, knowing full well that there’s barely enough room for two carts to pass as it is. So don’t get all indignant when I politely say “excuse me” and interrupt your oh so important decision making process on which box of cookies will best add to your obesity. You wouldn’t park your car right in the middle of the road, would you? So don’t park your cart in the middle of the aisle. Grow at least half a brain, morons.
—Grocery Store Traffic Cop
This article appears in Feb 12-18, 2009.
Totally, If you have ever been to Quebec, that supremist attitude is rampant! Get the fuck out of the way FUCKERS.
Go suck a dick!
I’m pretty sure the road analogy is bang on here. You can bet they are one of your road-laden banes of existence… straddling both lanes as they approach until they wake up and remember where the fuck they are going.
Oxford road much?
Not sure if it’s viable in your case, but I hit the store more often and buy less so I can hand-basket it up and get the hell outta there. Sure, I pack the thing to capacity… and usually end up carrying the last item in my free hand but I know there’s got to be a crowd in a single aisle to slow me down.
I hate these fuckers too. They’ll leave it in the middle of the aisle, then they’ll turn around to their spouse/kid and argue about what kind of spaghetti to get. I’ve pushed carts out of the way sometimes after asking them if I could get by. I usually get shot a dirty look as if I was stealing their first child. I’m like zzz in that I hit up the grocery store more often (maybe 4 times a week) and I usually do it on the way home from work, just to make it easier. It’s the last thing I want to do too, but it’s so much easier using those baskets, and provided that the store isn’t too busy I’m outta there in less than 30 minutes.
i think its funny how you link obesity and rudeness…is it only the fat people blocking the aisles while the skinny more polite people pull their carts off to the the side?
@kilo…sorry for your bad experience in quebec…when i have been there i have had nothing but fantastic experiences with everyone. in fact, montreal was where i encountered some of the most friendly, easy going people ive found anywhere. and even the “notorious” insane drivers were nowhere to be found. might be a good idea not to label a whole province based on a few negative experiences you may have had.
Dear john…. I lived just outside of montreal for 2 years and they were filled with good and bad experiences! When I was shopping in monrteal it wasn’t too bad, but montrealers are used to the system and the rest of quebec, northern and western mainly were just rude especially to the south of montreal!!!! So i’m not labelling the Communsit country of Quebec as rude, just when I’m out shopping in the grocery stores!
And its not just the Fat people who think that they are better than evrybody else rude people exist everywhere in society! Just recently it might have been just the Fat ones that have pissed people off while they were shopping!!
John: Did I refer to these people as being fat in any way other than “which box of cookies will best add to your obesity”? No. Why? Because I’m talking about stupidity, not obesity. Do I refer to them as being stupid in mulitiple ways? Yes. Why? Because they are asshole idiots. I don’t care if the person is fat, skinny, tall, short, able-bodied or quadriplegic. Stupid is stupid. So my guess is that you’re some fat guy who takes offense at my Bitch, simply because you’re fat and you feel that I am in some way targeting fat people. I’m not. I am targeting the asshole idiots who don’t have the UNcommon sense to stay the fuck out of the way. And before you counter-bitch me again about my wording, remember, you’re the one who had to spend hours defending your point of view on your pregnant co-worker because of poor wording.
If they make eye contact and don’t move their fucking cart, I barrel through, fuck the spits and farts that might follow. Only exceptions – old people.
I just push on through, fuck em!
well NW i will counter your point…it was not for poor wording that i “defended” my position..it was for lack of desire for posting a long winding, boring initial post. you imply that it was a chore for me to defend myself. you are incorrect. i enjoy a good debate. such was the expectation i had when posting the original bitch.
NW…how many more ways is it really necessary to refer to someone as fat other than, “which box of cookies will best add to your obesity?” that is directly implying aisle blockers are obese. thats irrefutable. if you had said “which box of cookies will cause you to become obese” than thats a whole different ball of wax.
and fyi nw so you know its not me taking personal offense. im not a “fat guy”. people can object to opinions voiced by others on grounds not related to their own situations simply because they dont agree.
Well, John, let’s see. I made one obesity reference and 3 stupidity references, so let’s take it at face value. 75% of these assholes are just plain stupid and 25% are fat AND stupid. How’s that? If I had said something like “interrupt your oh so important decision making process on which box of organic spaghetti will lessen your hippy B.O.” or “interrupt your oh so important decision making process on which brand of sugar laden snacks will shut your obnoxious brats the hell up” you’d say I was generalizing all hippies or all children. Or, if I had said what you suggest, “which box of cookies will cause you to become obese” you would argue that I am implying everyone who eats cookie will become obese. So unless you expect me to list every type of asshole aisle blocker there is, of which there is at least one in every type of person out there, take the bitch for what it is. A declaration of frustration with people who block aisles and give me a dirty look when I politely say “Excuse me”. And given that you like to argue for the sake of arguing (you’re not debating here, you’re arguing) feel free to counter-bitch once again. I find it amusing.
at nw….potato, pa-tot-o. obviously with such a definitive nick its pointless to “argue”