Yo, this one is mainly for the men cuz ya’ll be some dirty dogs. Did ya momma not learn you to wash your nasty ass properly? Why bother to take a shower and not soap up ya damn head? Jus’ cuz you got short hair don’t mean you never gotta wash that shit… you got my pillow case smellin like a dirty hairbrush. I had a boy over my crib to fix my toilet last week. He had his bare hands all wadin ’round inside the toilet tank and then never even washed them muthafuckas. Then he be all wanting to share my blunt afterwards. Ah HAIL NO, I said, go wash dem filthy mits first. Ya’ll shouldn’t need to be told but I will TELL you and I don’t care if you get embarrassed neither! You is a GROWN ass MAN and I ain’t getting sick for you cuz you too stupid to know simple hygiene and cleanliness. For real, my ex would go and pull the “shocker” on me… (I don’t normally care for that but sometimes I get carried away in the heat of the moment), then two minutes later he be straight to the kitchen eatin a club sammich. My girlfriend told me she went back to a dude’s house and seen his bed wit no sheets and all his curly little hairs were ingrained into the fabric of the mattress. Just weaved right in! Yes, he had quite a collection built up… now THAT shit’s a turn-off. Bustin nuts off onto your bare mattress and sleepin on it night after night, skin cells flyin everywhere. I used to fuck wit this one guy til I found out he cleaned his entire house with the same rag, bathroom, kitchen – same rag. Ever hear of cross-contamination bitch? Then he wanna come around me kissin! No I don’t want to kiss the lips, that have drank from cups, that have been washed with rags that also washed your toilet. —Um HAIL No!
This article appears in Feb 23-29, 2012.
Ebonics is alive and well.
So, did you get that Coast position , or not?
Ah Jesus wept! IT’S back….
Wow OB !
THat bitch should be a poster on the wall in every written english class in North America.
As the bad example… it rocks !
Although it is also testimony to the failure of our school system in Nova Scotia, to teach basic english & that’s quite disturbing.
all this really tells me is that you know a metric shit-ton of skeezy, greasy ass choda people…
and you’re lucky if you work minimum wage with that retarded ‘lingo’.
Listening to people talk that way is bad enough..it’s even more painful to read.
I think i lost a few IQ points just from reading that……
You loved the shocker. Admit it.
LOL @ “the shocker”
I am so frigging juvenile. >: (
Someone’s just tryin’ too hard here, guys.
And zed’s right — where do you FIND these skeeze balls? Any guy I know or have been with has had decent hygiene.
If dirty skeeze balls are the only men you’re attracting… perhaps some self-reflection is in order?
well, if you fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime, that’s what you get. it’s quality, over quanity.
A real man would have given you the ‘Arabian goggles’ followed by the ‘Spiderman’ or ‘Gorilla Mask’ though.
No Fool- this is comical. I love reading your bitches.
Although, I completely disagree with a lot of the comments you made on mental illness, you seriously know how to write a comedic bitch.
You lost me at YO
Can anyone actually take this bitch seriously? With that mutilation of the English language! I had to read it 3 times over because I was laughing so hard!
Oh no! I hope you don’t think women are exempt from this problem. I’ve been through some dark, inhabitable, sometimes hostile, environments just for my lady friend. The ladies can be just as nasty with their mess. I’ve been to a girls apartment where no matter where you sat, within arms reach was enough clothing, make-up, accessories, and shoes to give myself a much needed make-over thrice over! So I say, Wash ya damn mouth gurl, an then I’ll worry ’bout washin’ my hands!
definitely the fool’s shtick, purplefire
Hail to the queen!
Would you mind running for mayor?
I prefer the peppermint bobsled…
very festive.
Jesus titty-fucking Christ, Sebastian!
You’re making me *HAWTAZHAIL*!!!
(ahem)
That is all.
Wp
we already have a fool for a mayor, xeno
Surprisingly good punctuation… almost makes me wonder if this is fake. Usually someone who speaks with that kind of language doesn’t use commas or apostrophes. Not trying to judge…
it is fake, but it’s from the court jester, so it rawks *fool fool fool, corn corn corn*
This shit be triflin’ yo!
I am truly dumber for having read this, is this really what our edumacation has left us with, Hail yes!!! lmfao!!
Will someone please explain to me what “the shocker” is?
I feel like I’m missing out on something.
Try the Urban Dictionary
Well, I’ll be damned, Ivan, MM did get the job – heh-heh-heh.
Anybody else catch our own beloved Professor Cato on Inside the Actor’s Studio, last sunday?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlCFo-QI8wI
Good bitch. OP seems to have had the misfortune to be associated with a few men who have less an average standards towards cleanliness and good hygiene. You have the man who washes his mugs with the same cloth as he used scrub out caked-on urine. Another makes a sandwich after sticking his fingers in OP’s orifices and no washing in between.
I think you took a positive step in throwing out a challenge to these men. ‘Please try to maintain a fresher, more anti-bacterial living space if you’re entertaining any notion of pleasurable physical contact with myself’.
Maybe it will work. Wouldn’t that be a shocker!
GV, Shocker = 2 in the pink, 1 in the stink.
http://www.wrongtees.com/images/dynamic/th…
I won’t elaborate anymore than that. I think you can probably figure it out from there.
This has got to be the worst written thing I’ve read in a very long time. An attempt at comedy falling short. Sadly tedious. Perhaps that was the intent to come of as a mocking use of “language”. I still got the message though, people are generally not up to par on their cleaning standards. I agree with this.
I smell FAKE. Don’t go there, Girlfriend. Oh no she didn’t.
They should make ebonics a 3rd accepted language in Canada. RECONIZE~ I would be bilingual. I got fluent growin up in many multicultural neighborhoods. Nothin wrong with a lil’ urban slang. Whatcha problem, you RACist?
i think you have a useful skill, fool, i have trouble writing phonetically. ivan and vastie are good for russian/cockney slang
ah, the shocker is ‘the bowling ball grip’
Skip english class one too many times?
I weep for the english language…….