To my moderately overweight freinds: I love you, and I would never want to say anything to hurt you. That’s why I don’t say this to your face. I know you struggle with your weight, and I try to be supportive, but you sometimes make me feel like you resent me, and that hurts.
When we go out to eat together, you usually try to order something healthy like baked fish and steamed vegetables. Then you stare longingly at my fish and chips with extra tartar sauce, and sigh about how lucky I am. I never order desert, even if I want it, because you would make me feel like I was rubbing it in your face. “Oh sure! Order the cheesecake, bitch!” You say it like you’re joking. Sort of. You talk about my metabolism as if it was something I won in a lottery. If only you had my metabolism, you too would be able to eat anything you want and never gain a pound. So you tell yourself.
But the truth is, I am not “lucky”. I do not have a “fast metabolism”. I did not win some kind of genetic lottery that gives me an unfair advantage. I cycle 10 km each way to work every day, summer and winter. I also either run or swim every day, and weight train 3-4 days a week. I play squash once or twice a week, and on weekends I go hiking, cross country skiing, canoeing, or some other outdoor activity. And THAT is why I am thin. Your constant bleating about how unfair it is completely dismisses all my hard work.
I realize that not everyone wants to, or can, be as active as I am. If I am “lucky”, it’s because I enjoy exercise. If you don’t want to work out hard every day, the tradeoff is that you don’t get to eat whatever you want. It’s not unfair at all. It’s perfectly fair. So lay off.
—Your Skinny Friend
This article appears in Jan 29 – Feb 4, 2009.
Order your dessert and tell them to fuck right off when they say something “jokingly”. Remind them that you work your ass off (literally) to maintain your weight, so it’s not like you sit on your ass and do nothing and stuff your face and never gain a pound. You work just as hard as they do, and you shouldn’t feel anything but proud of that (and if they were decent friends, they wouldn’t make you feel like they resent you in the first place).
Order two pieces of cheesecake and tell them to stick one of them up their fat asses.
This bitch makes me feel like I want to exercise more … even though I DO have a fast metabolism. It’s just not fast enough to keep up with four months of sitting on my ass and eating bacon sandwiches.
mmmmmmm…… Bacon…… Dammit, now I’m hungry. I see both sides, it’s so difficult to maintain a healthy weight in this day and age especially where you’re inundated with ads for food every two seconds. I have to walk at least three times a week for about an hour just to keep the potbelly from sneaking up on me. Yes, most people have to work really hard to get and stay fit and to those people, good for you. The problem becomes that you need to be the better person and not make fun of them for being overweight. If you do make fun of them for being overweight (this becomes especially bad if they’re stress eaters) you’ve become no better than them.
Today is my birthday and I ate a HUGE piece of quadruple chocolate cake from Glen Eagle Bakery.
My ass is SO not going to fit in my pants tomorrow and I don’t care. I’ll go pantless if I have to. If anyone sees a random pantless person on the 18 tomorrow that’s me. Feel free to say hi.
Happy Birthday PK
Awww thanx!
I’m a little nervous about saying hi to girls without pants… makes me seem like a perv, even if it’s their birthday.
How about being supportive of your friends, and offering to go for a walk with them, or offer to make some time and join a gym to work out together. Trust me, a little unconditional support is what every overweight girl with low self esteem needs.
And don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for eating dessert. If you work hard, you get to eat hard. (wow, that doesn’t sound right…but you get my meaning!)