To those of you who neglect to pick up after your shit-factories on Brenton St. between Morris & Clyde, fuck you fuckbags. I shudder to think, but I can only assume that it is dog shit. Regardless, it’s frigging disgusting. I’ve never seen so much crap in one place. it’s as if someone held their own private poopoo parade by upending a royal flush all along the block. It’s just unbefuckinlievable. From the still-in-tact brown dollies off to the side and in the snowbank, to the festering stinky spectators that look on while their cousins on the sidewalk become embossed with the shoe prints of unsuspecting bastards and get streaked down half the block like chocolate fudge dragons, I mean, this shit is goddam fucking eh-vry-where. And I feel like I would be satisfied to shove it right down your stupid goddam fucking clown throats; just a fantasy though. Apart from the shit all over the place, it’s a pretty nice street I guess. So bring a bag, a Smarties box, something, and stoop and scoop. It’s not neuroscience . You know who you are, so consider yourselves busted.
—Sam Je
This article appears in Feb 26 – Mar 4, 2009.
yeah,i really know how you feel there.i would love to see some asshole eat their mutts shit.i almost had a chance to make that happen one time,but a cop drove by and saved his ass.and the son of a bitch tried to charge me with assault.shit owners beware,your fucking day is coming,and i hope you develope a taste for it,because i will get you next time.
Bahahahaha chocolate fudge dragons. Best bitch ever.
Also, the mental image of a smarties box with a big ol’ dog-log stuffed into it is … oddly pleasing.
I browbeat the hell out of the fuckers I see leaving turds all over Rainbow Haven. How much of a lazy fuck can you be to not pick up your dog’s crap?
I LOVE the imagery in this bitch.
bring the kiddies and say you’re having a cylindrical easter egg hunt. They will scour the entire area for you and likely not miss many. problem solved.
This is for sure the funniest bitch I’ve ever read.
When you eat those Smarties, do you eat the red chunks last?