Neck tattoos. Pleather. Expensive towels that fray after one wash. Anything I have to iron. Bench. Payphones that don’t work. Sudoku. Dog shit on sidewalks. Anne Hathaway. Coach purses. Sloppy Big Macs. #52 bus. Wrist tattoos. LED lights. Dust. Wire hangers. Spitting. Patchouli. Unsalted fries. Women that can’t walk in heels. Gel nails. My creepy neighbour. People with great asses in bad jeans. Ron James. Big ass headphones. No lights on bikes. Baby on board stickers. People who don’t take down their lost pet posters. Taylor Swift. Nail biters. Trick or treating teenagers. Smart cars. Adirondack chairs. Plastic bandages. The price of gum. Vitamin water. Sweatpants. Litterbugs. —That’s it for Now
This article appears in Nov 3-9, 2011.
sudoku? how very odd
Of course you are annoyed……you eat Big Mac’s and put MORE salt on those fries while riding the 52 bus….and um, where does your packaging go when you stuff your gob on this outing? You annoy me!
http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivation…
I like this bitch. It’s pure.
Life must be treating you fairly well for these things to be your top ‘misery moans’. If bored and in need for something different try dealing with ill health, poverty, hunger, thirst, loneliness etc. Many live with those ‘annoyances’, and worse, daily. Perhaps if you help others you will not have time to dwell on these current ‘horrors’ of life that seem to bother you. And you may make someone else happy, as well as yourself.
Coach purses have become SO common now that HSC has a coach store.
*sigh*
Yeah, baby! If it weren’t for the adirondaks and the LEDs, I could have written this one! I want more of these!
What annoys the fuck out of me are people whining about petty shit while life’s tractor trailer of huge, serious turds is waiting to smother your stupid ass.
Yes, FS.. unadulterated.
I don’t like that I keep forgetting to oil my chain. My left sink clogs regularly. I don’t like the cold.
uh.. i’m trying to decide whether i like this bitch or not. On the one hand, it’s not some convoluted festival of obscure complaints like so many bitches you find here. I like that. And I have the type of personality that tends to appreciate a good, no-nonsense list. On the other hand.. the things you bitch about paint you as one of those self-involved anti-hipster hipsters (you know, same shit, next gen) Which is distasteful and silly.
I’ll call it a draw.
If these things are all you have in your to annoy you count yourself among the fortunate. There are worse things to complain about that are actually horrific; tragedy that I would not wish upon anyone. Ask me how I know this.
Kthxbai.
oh noooo whatever will we do now that coach purses are common.. sigh
Vitamin water is awesome. I love the Aquafina 10 cal ones. I think it has artificial sweetener though. Wire hangers have some good uses they just suck for hanging things on. A great ass should look great regardless of the jeans, some asses only look good in certain pants.. those are deceptive. THAT is annoying. I’m never annoyed if I have a nice ass to look at. I don’t know if there are really any working payphones any more. Any time I’ve had to use one they don’t work. Women wearing heels that they can’t walk in.. yes. Price of gum? Now you’re reaching..
Baby on board stickers? Come on.. Tattoos? headphones? Relax your sphincter.
I’ll give you Taylor Swift.. all American apple pie eatin, blue eyes havin.. country singin heffa..
Wow, I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING!
OB, don’t forget fat, lazy people and camel toes.
Uh! I love this bitch. Has anyone seen that Taylor Swift car around the city? I only actually saw it once myself… it’s like just some shitty car with the license plate “TSWIFT” and there’s a bunch of cow boy hats and other “country” things stuck all over the windows. It bugged me.
Taylor Swift … I just don’t get the huge deal about her! Yeah, she has catchy tunes … but live … less than stellar … at least show some T and A if you’re gonna sing like shit.
Look up Breagh MacKinnon. Love her, and home grown!!!!
I HAVE seen the car to which you refer, Mel! LMAO. That shit be all kinds of crazy. Come to think of it, I think it’s actually a Suzuki Swift, isn’t it? (Maybe not..IDK) I saw that a while back and all could do was look at the girl driving it with utter contempt and shake my head. The phrase, “You disgust me!” ran through my head like a news channel ticker tape.
There is also an older lady that drives a small car (Kia? Hyundai?) and the entire interior is COVERED in stuffed, plush toy frogs! Dash, seats, headliner, rear view mirror, doorposts, everywhere! It’s hilarious. If nothing else, I suppose it could act to supplement the airbag system. lol
Sudoku? I love sudoku. Gum is quite cheap at Dollarama, 69 cents a pack to be exact.
The only stuff that annoys me is that which smacks me in the face or makes me fall down. I really hate banging my head, it make me furious because it hurts and.. who do you blame?
😀 Lol 😀 Thank You! This bitch made my day! Ps- Im with you on the unsalted fries bit:D
i really hate, when you go to sit somewhere and you misjudge the height
choda-sweats….
that is all.
Life is not treating me very fairly at all, which is why I choose to let the petty shit get to me every now and then. Would you prefer I focus on and bitch about the real shit in my life? Let’s see…how about my Aunt’s suicide, or my brother’s alcoholism, or my mother’s early-onset Alzheimer’s, or my father’s death, or my young niece’s promiscuity, or my nephew’s terrorizing behaviour, or how about my own struggle with bi-polar disorder??? I can barely get my ass out of the house to go to my shitty, min-wage paying job right now, so I choose to let the small shit get to me rather than be completely overwhelmed with the horrific shit going on right now.
i am well pleased that you chose us. it’s free and it feels fantastic
Can we add Mayor Kelly and the Council to the list?
o.p., i had agreed with you, right up until you said ron james. that was the straw that fucked you. i like him, and he is better than a lot of other comics out there.so, fuck you then.
let the promiscuity and alcoholism go…
you’ve bigger fist to fry.
fish… shit…
never mind.
Just freak the fuck out and get a nice padded cell to relax in for a while.
mmmm, sweet sedation….
donarious eats his fries without salt.
He gets them to make them special for him at mcdicks.
It’s annoying.
Not as annoying as watching you sit there mixing salt with ketchup and eating it off your fingers. But I don’t mind asking for extra salt and giving it to you 😀
“Unsalted fries please. Thank you. May I have some extra packages of salt? Thanks.”
I don’t mix the salt with ketchup, you fuckface.
I mix it with vinegar.
Get your condiments right, fatso.
don’t those frites have salt in them anyway. good grief a condiment fight
because vinegar makes more sense….
okay…..
I prefer to get my daily salt requirement from bacon.
I stopped adding salt to my food, actually. I’m just cooking with it (I don’t use a whole lot while cooking).
New thing I’m tryin’ out.
In fact, the pants I had on today pinched my waist last week and today there’s room to spare.
🙂
On a slightly sadder note — I’ve given up bacon and sausage. 🙁
:O Blasphemy!
anybody gonna grow a mustache this month? http://www.apetogentleman.com/wp-content/u…
Mary Walsh is shaving hers off
A mental image I could have done nicely without, Baz. Got any links to “Barbara Cartland’s Erotic World of Boudoir Photography” you wish to share with us?
I need to be clean-shaven for costumes, so I won’t be growing a ‘stache this year.
aah yes, hal-con
Yes, and other events as well.
in bed
OOOH I’ve got one… Power outages!
>: ) I take it kith and kin survived the snowpocalypse?
there you are, i assumed your hardy nature, stood you in good stead. get any treats^^
Thanks, guys…it’s nice to be missed!
Lost power on Saturday around 8 pm. I had modified my costume so I looked like a member of the Canadian Bobsled team (apropos with the weather and needed only goggles) but it was already up to eight inches of snow, with NO SNOWIES!
Now, y’all know I’m a good lil Canadian gal who does not dick around with winter. None of those dinky little snow scrapers for ME, and fuck all weather tires, but I haven’t put em on yet, and didn’t want to drive over a mountain…
We are still without power, but we have a wood stove, gas hot water and a gas range so we’re warm and clean and fed, but no wifi. I’m at the library in the next town over…
They cancelled Halloween, so we’ve got lots of treats!
You used to fucking mix ketchup and salt together before you fucking liar! It looked like a gritty, melted down lipstick; something sebastian would try and wear to family dinner.
those that know me, know i already have a lush bush, under my beak. and said bush, is growing more every day. come on you pussies, grow a face warmer. girls too, if you want to and can.
I laughed so hard at the Mary Walsh is shaving her moustache comment
I liked this bitch, actually. A good, old-fashioned laundry list of peeves in the grand tradition of George Carlin.