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More talk of a stadium and a CFL franchise. That’s what this city is missing! Maybe they can dismantle the Convention centre and use old bridge parts to build a stadium on the cheap. And call the team the Halifax Boondoggles. —Taxed out
This article appears in Jan 26 – Feb 1, 2017.
3 Comments
Lyle Lanley: You know, a town with money’s a little like the mule with the spinning wheel. No one knows how he got it and danged if he knows how to use it.
Homer: Heh-heh, mule.
Lyle Lanley: The name’s Lanley, Lyle Lanley. And I come before you good people tonight with an idea. Probably the greatestAw, it’s not for you. It’s more a Shelbyville idea.
Mayor Quimby: Now, wait just a minute. We’re twice as smart as the people of Shelbyville. Just tell us your idea and we’ll vote for it.
Lyle Lanley: All right. I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll show you my idea. I give you the Springfield Monorail! (everyone gasps) I’ve sold monorails to Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook, and, by gum, it put them on the map! Well, sir, there’s nothin’ on earth like a genuine bona-fide electrified six-car monorail! What’d I say?
Ned Flanders: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: What’s it called?
Patty and Selma: Monorail.
Lyle Lanley: That’s right! Monorail!
Cast: Monorail…monorail…monorail…
Miss Hoover: I hear those things are awfully loud.
Lyle Lanley: It glides as softly as a cloud.
Apu: Is there a chance the track could bend?
Lyle Lanley: Not on your life, my Hindu friend.
Barney Gumble: What about us brain-dead slobs?
Lyle Lanley: You’ll be given cushy jobs.
Grampa Simpson: Were you sent here by the devil?
Lyle Lanley: No, good sir, I’m on the level.
Chief Wiggum: The ring came off my pudding can.
Lyle Lanley: Take my pen knife, my good man. I swear, it’s Springfield’s only choice! Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
All: Monorail…
Lyle Lanley: What’s it called? Monorail… Once again! MONORAIL!
Marge: But Main Street’s still all cracked and broken.
Bart: Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken!
All: Monorail… Monorail!!!!!!!!! MONORAIL!! MONORAIL!!!!!
Homer: MonoD’oh!
I would rather see the city put money into neighbourhood recreational facilities and programs. Give people more opportunity to be active rather than sitting on their arses watching other people be active.
Methinks….YUP….agreed completely…it would also be nice if they would actually DO SOMETHING with our public non-transportation system so that folks would actually use it.