Dear Drunken guy in Spryfield,
I appreciate you stumbling across the crosswalk, just far enough to be right in front of my car, and then deciding to throw up all the booze you had consumed the night before. It was a nice wake up at 11am…..also, you are a disgusting crusty fucker.

—a very weak stomached driver

This article appears in Jun 4-10, 2009.

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7 Comments

  1. Guuhhh…better out than in I always say. Why couldn’t he have saved it for the harbour? One more heap of sludge wouldn’t hurt…

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  3. I don’t think anyone ‘decides’ to projectile vomit. Projectile vomit at will would be a wicked superpower though, nobody would fuck with you.

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  4. You mean this type of thing happened in Spryfield? say it aint so, what is the world coming to when one of this fair cities gated upscale communities allows drunken hooligans into it’s midst.

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  5. I like the way you think Fizz…I have a few situations in mind where that superpower would have really come in handy! OP, you shouldn’t be sharing your mocha without a lysol wipe handy – icky! Save your mocha for yourself!

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