You emotionally tormented me for the time we knew each other, so why can’t I stop thinking about you? I don’t want to get in touch with you—you were never good for me. But you excited me. You were different. I’m not the kind of person you’d usually associate with—I’m pretty white collar. Sometimes you opened up to me, and looked at me with those sad eyes. You were lost. I opened up my heart to you, because I enjoyed your company, and I felt there was something inside you that was reaching out for stability. But you’re so self destructive, and for those months, I was run ragged emotionally trying to figure you out. Damn you for making me wonder if you’re ok. You used me, played me, treated me terribly. You scared me. I knew you were trouble, but I was drawn too you for some stupid reason. You weren’t supposed to tear up when I said it was over.
I hope you’re ok. I hope you straighten your life out and find someone good. I hope you realize your better than how you treat yourself. You have good inside you, use it. —Cares Too Much
This article appears in Mar 24-30, 2011.
You know what, OP? There are just some people you CAN’T care about. They won’t let you. The more you seemingly care and the more you extend yourself to them the more they push you away.
You sound like me — always trying to fix people. I’m always trying to fix broken people. I want to make it all better for them. I’m a natural care taker. Yes it’s mentally draining, and yes it hurts when they push you away, but it’s unstoppable and usually just leads to frustrated fits of crying. I swear I was a damn carebear in a past life. Probably that pink one — “Love a lot” *shakes head*
Honestly, I’d say this is more of a flaw than a positive attribute. Good on you for walking away. I’m terrified of change and just can’t let go of toxic people like the subject of your love.
Think I know who this is about…
Sounds like L was backed into a corner and had no choice
If this person cared about you they would have taken your help and changed and become a better person – but they obviously don’t care about themselves let alone anyone else (or the only person they care about is themselves and they take and take and take from others). You were right to get out – stop worrying – you’ve already wasted too much of yourself on this person OP.
Sadly, some people withdraw when someone tries to help them, especially people with trust issues. It’s really heartbreaking when you really do want to help, and they constantly shun your efforts.