There is nothing more annoying than going to the bathroom to take a leak, than to walk into the thick stench of a ripe bowel movement. There are several people with whom I work, that have various fixtures they carry with them like custom drinking mugs, etc. One particular individual (the guy with the red hair!) is ALWAYS in the bathroom taking a dump.
I don’t mind that people occasionally HAVE to go, but when you train yourself to be regular at work, you are forcing other people to not only cover for you, while you read your novel or the newspaper, but you are choking people to death as they urinate.
Probably the most annoying thing is to go to the whizmaster, to see all three toilets occupied, with all three occupants farting, belching, and straining, all while rustling papers, and exchanging sections under the stall partitions. Come on, the crapper isn’t a place to socialize. Train yourself to go at home.
This article appears in Sep 4-10, 2008.
I know it’s rude, but in an emergency I like to drop my dookies on another floor’s washroom with my floor selection being dependent on the urgency of my bathroom needs. Afterall, I have to work with the people on my own floor and wouldn’t subject the people I sometimes care about to my aromatic anus and its sphincter symphony. Actually, where I work, I think this is common practice…I once ran into a co-worker on another floor doing the same thing and I keep seeing strangers scurrying to the stairwell after leaving our designated washrooms.
Personally I’d rather the smell of someone else’s twosies than that disgusting air freshener crap they sometimes spray to try to cover it up. the only result of that? shit berries.
Ok.. this is a bit overboard. Bowel movements are a fact of life. And what world do you live in where you can “train” your body to refrain from shitting at work? Keep doing that, and you’ll do yourself some damage, like hemmaroids, etc. I mean, seriously. Doesn’t everyone know that you shouldn’t “hold it in”? It’s frigging unhealthy.As for passing newspapers back and forth under the bathroom stalls, I agree. That is ridiculous, and shouldn’t be happening. Nor would I ever take a book to the bathroom while I was at work.
Jesus H. Christ, aren’t there enough anal retentive people in the world? I’m sorry, OP, but expecting people’s bowels to perform on cue is about as easy as circumsizing a fruit fly.
You people need to visit poopreport.com. It’s about joyously embracing all that is fecal….figuratively speaking of course- please don’t remind me about the ‘two girls/one cup’ debacle. ((((shudders)))))
I’ve trained myself to not go at work. My schedule just adapted over time. I prefer not to do it at work just in case something goes haywire…
My old boss used to call me from the can to discuss the day’s agenda – nothing like taking orders to the lovely musical symphony of toots, phoots and plops.
More poop Bitches. Predictably, I say please DO NOT pass me any section of the newspaper under the stall. Not after you have had your poopy fingers on it.Ick.
Personally,I prefer to do it at work, it is the only time a person gets paid to poop.And if something as natural as bowel movements bothers you that much( because I am sure yours smells like roses ), go find another bathroom.
I make it a POINT to shit at work. I work 8.5+ hours and am expected not to move from my cubical? Fuck that shit, I might even sing “on top of spaghetti” just to punctuate the point…Land or sea let your shit flow free!
when i used to work at a job i dreaded (warehouse) i used to go take a dump just as another break. i mean, if i would spend 15 minutes standing idly by a window, i would get it trouble. not if i spend 15 minutes playing chess on my cellphone in the washroom.
Quote: I’ve trained myself to not go at work. My schedule just adapted over time. I prefer not to do it at work just in case something goes haywire…Phil________________________”…In case something goes haywire”? Whatever THAT means. LOL
I am not one for using public washrooms at all. But I do have to agree, crapping on the companies dime is dandy. Paid to poop, saw-wheat.On a side note: Take a Dump…Take a Piss…Where are you going to take it. And why, taking piss and/or shit somewhere? That is gross. I mean unless you are taking it to a doctor or something, but even then.That expression needs to be changed. I don’t know; Deposit a Dump. Process some Piss. Something better than taking it. Paints a terrible mental picture. Walking around with a clear bag with a brown solid and some yellowish liquid in it, leaking all over the place. Nasty.