Not even Yoda deserves a third chance

I am not going to be your low self-esteem punching bag any more. You dramatically broke up with me—twice. And each time, you made me feel like it was my fault – You said I made you feel bad about your life and your lifestyle. Don’t project your insecurities on me. Your bad feelings about who you are, and your life choices, are self-generated. Mature people in relationships have conversations when they hit road blocks. But you aren’t confident to hold those talks, so you go into dramatized sabotage mode. You describe yourself as ‘spiritually’ in tune—but what I have learned is that someone may bring spiritual awareness to certain practices in their life—but not know how to bring this awareness into their intimate relationships. I found the teenage boy in you—and he was whiney, hungry for power and influence (without having earned it), self centered and insecure. You said you wanted an open relationship to explore ‘connections’ with other ‘people’—so go ahead and explore –I’m sure these ‘people’ are truly fascinating—-stop contacting me. You disappointed me. You would rather hurt me than look inward and grow as a person. I’m glad to move on from that. —6 months in a leaking boat

This article appears in Oct 17-23, 2013.