Twenty bucks an hour is a very reasonable rate, especially using your own equipment. People call you out to give them an estimate and you give them the price and they say “Oh my… I was expecting 10 or 11 dollars an hour!” You can’t or don’t have time to take care of your own lawn—live in huge houses, very large properties, professionals—and want to pay shit for property care. It is better to stick with single-lot city dwellings and get double the money for half the time. Those people are nicer and more with it. Cheap bastards. -More Wage. Less Time. Nicer People.
This article appears in Jun 12-18, 2014.
The short sighted NS economy strikes again. Won’t pay reasonable market rates for services, expects everything to be free, resulting in those service providers that do stay afloat to charge outrageous rates just to make a living. Vicious cycle of fail here. We can never get out of it.
I can just imagine the start of the reply ” Well in my day”
Why do you think Dollar Stores are so popular?
$20 per hour for someone that gets the job done is a sweet deal.
$10 per hour for someone that is best described as “the walking dead” is a waste of money.
$10 per hour for someone that works their butt off, is exploitation.
Any questions?
Well, add in that you are working under the table and therefore aren’t paying the minimum 18% tax rate (plus EI/CPP)… Add in the fact you use your own equipment (not a huge savings)… If you were cute… I’d give you $15.
Damn we don’t pay our lawn care guys enough, that must be why all these kids are moving out west! the landscaping industry doesn’t pay enough!
well, I’m sure the kids move ‘out west’ for work at a decent wage. But ‘out west’ we pay for lawn care by the job, not by the hour.
I’ve discovered that you can take the ferry to Woodside faster than the bus, there are no crazies and best of all, it’s free during Bike Week!
Yeah, don’t bathe in the glory there Jenny… you have yet to prove yourself to me!!!
Now, fix the no coffee after 3pm problem at the hospital and I’ll think about it!
Pushing a lawn mower is NOT worth 20$ an hour. Unless your also giving out blowjobs with that.
You do realize 12 yr old kids mow lawns.
I’m gobsmacked – I pay $60 to have my 1 acre property done due to my partner’s mobility issues – it takes our dude less than an hour to finish – I thought it was a good deal because he’s supplying his own ride-on mower – and I live in Hillybilly Hollow where everyone is chronically unemployed.
can you mow my lawn please?
The obvious Cape Breton solution, Unionise!
Yeah. It’s a sad situation. I will stick to my guns like I usually do. When they start that schtick my usual polite response is “Well… for the frugal person… probably the best option is to call around and get other quotes… and don’t forget to ask “When can it be done?” If you want… you can get back to me. Have a nice day.”
The only way I can’t or wouldn’t be able to mow my own lawn is if a: I have no heartbeat and b: both my legs are broken.
The only time I don’t mow is when it hasn’t rained for a spell, I see the neighbors mowing in the dry heat and watch their lawns turn to toast while mine is flourishing away.
The 20 quid I saved I can spend on weed, Meaty where are you? I’ll roll one up.
20 doll hairs per hour to mow a lawn? I’m a professional with three degrees and I don’t even make that!! You ain’t a fuckin’ brain surgeon there pal, give it up and accept 10 – or 15 if you’re damn lucky!
No_fool if you make under $20/hr with three degrees you are either completely incompetent or a liar.
Perhaps she has mistaken “degrees” for “convictions”. Not an uncommon phenomenon in socio-economic milieu.
DEGREES AND CONVICTIONS
Two points:
(1) How can one possibly mistake “degrees” for “convictions.” The former is an academic achievement while the latter refers to a belief. The categories, in other words, are incommensurable (that means that they cannot be compared).
(2) Can you possibly support your claim that the mistake is not “an uncommon phenomenon in socio-economic milieu” by which I assume you mean the professional socio-economic milieu? Failing that, would you say that your accusation is little more than just another Halifax Underclass gripe and to be dismissed as such?
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
G.E.D. = Pleading no contest to the charge of “Yankin’ dat phony bitch Shawteequa’s skanky-ass weave out of her scalp fo’ thinkin’ she be all dat, when she clearly ain’t”
A not un-common felony in no-fool’s particular socio-economic milieu.
Now go fuck yourself.
I treasure my ball-play.
It’s an open market, so if the OB is making $20 an hour for mowing lawns and can fill their schedule, than clearly that’s what the market is. For those who would never pay that have decided their own effort trumps the $20, and that’s fine. But others may find $20 more worth it than their time, effort or ability.
I have a degree, but those looking down on what OB is making because it’s ‘just mowing a lawn’ are somewhat ignorant. Just because one job is mental and one is more physical, it doesn’t mean one person is working harder than the other.
BALL PLAY
No_ fool, did you hear what Ivan told you to go and do? Are you going to stand for it? Why not take up a bat and take part in his “ball play”?
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
Do I detect a hint of melanchol in Montrealman’s overture to no fool. Does the arrival of summer trigger a fond remembrance of his past folie a dewsh with Ms. Belinda Shartwell, the loved and revered Wogdog. “Folie a dewsh” – that’s french, bud, for place your fulsome lips upon my nethers and draw deeply. Is our resident philospher king lonely for someone to tie off his colostomy bags and “polish the whippet”. Does he think no fool is desperately seeking a Sugar Daddy, or , in his case, an Ambien Daddy. Stay tuned, Bitchers to see how this Ghetto meets Ivory Tower Passion Play unfolds
Don’t forget to go fuck yourself.
My fissure’s in Uraguay
“I’m a professional with three degrees and I don’t even make that!!” ~No fool
Uhhhh didn’t you say you were on disability for bi polar disorder?
Also, if you’re a ‘professional’ (what the fuck does that even mean — you could be a professional pie eater for all we know) with three degrees and not making at least 20 bones/hr… something ain’t right.
I think she meant to say that she was a professional singer with the Three Degrees, PK.
Perhaps she was referring to the number of times that Revenue Canada gave her the third degree about welfare and childcare benefits.
Um, there are many degreed (single/multiple degrees) people out there making under $20/hr–that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re incompetent. Nova Scotia is notorious for its employers with shit wages. I have a BComm and I kid you fucking not, the position I held before leaving NS paid about $27K/year (before taxes!)–definitely under $20/hr. Did I ever think maybe it was because I was incompetent? Nope. I moved west and got the same type of position, same field and even same industry, and started out at over $70K. That was years ago and now I’m making over $100K.
RSVPS
BALL PLAY (2)
: no_fool, no_fool! Where are you? Pick up that bat and hit a homer with Ivan’s ball. He only has one so there’s no problem with choice. And don’t let him throw you his wicked curve ball. Line his ball up, and POW! Over the fence it goes!
: Ivan One Ball (11:28AM)
It’s true, you did detect a note of “melanchol” but it wasn’t occasioned by any “overture” to no_fool. It was the result, rather, of my continuing critique of what I have characterized as “The New Feminism” as it appears in the latest issue of the Journal of Philosophy of Education. Entitled “On the Psychologizing of Philosophy of Education: The Role of Relationships and the New Feminism,” it’s a critique of Morwenna Griffiths, of the University of Edinburgh, the doyenne of the movement, and her misconceived assault on Jean-Jacques Rousseau’s “Emile” (1762!) which she mistakenly claims, is the source of the current gender dualism in philosophy of education.
Griffiths’ New Feminism, in case you were wondering, embodies that for which Griffiths accuses Rousseau, i.e., an ontological dualism, since it posits the foundations of a resurgent feminism not in the form of those qualities of mind and achievement associated with the old feminism – women were assessed on the same male criteria – but rather on the nature of their caring and nurturing relationships, usually with each other. (I detect a strong strain of lesbianism in The New Feminism but, of course, I make no mention of this in my critique.)
In any case, this morning I wrote the 14th. installment of my critique and yes, it was the occasion of considerable “melanchol” on my part but due more to the tendentious nature of Griffiths’ campaign than anything to do with no_fool. By way of a conclusion I quoted the complete last paragraph of Rousseau’s “The Social Contract” in an attempt to demonstrate that he was not the author of any gender dualism but rather that he was the champion of throwing off the yoke of social inequality in general and divine-right monarchy in particular.
In any case, my past “folie a dewsh” with Wogdog is still a matter of some regret since I detected feminine gentleness under her somewhat difficult exterior. Some anus blew her cover just like The Blowhard blew mine so we really have something in common. Maybe she’ll read this and return to the lists.
While I found your references to colostomy bags and polishing the whippets obscure, I found those to an “Ambien Daddy” and “Ghetto meets Ivory Tower Passion Play” conceptually empty, trivial and absurd. Most likely they find their homes in the “entertainment” of the lower reaches of the Halifax Underclass. Would it be possible to elevate the quality of your references so as to engage those who possess both intelligence and a considerable degree of academic attainment?
Oh yes, nearly forgot. Go fuck yourself.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
You still here?
Didn’t I tell you to go fuck yourself?
I mis-measure the fairway.
Someone with a simple BComm isn’t a professional.
He probably did go fuck himself, Ivan! Likely to his old posts! RSVP: Fap fap fap!
What the fuck else is there to do when you’re a retired philosophy PhD?
No wonder it’s always a pleasure!
“Someone with a simple BComm isn’t a professional.”
Eh, but this chick with a “simple BComm” is probably making a lot more money than you. 🙂
You have no idea HOW much money I do or don’t make because I’m not tacky enough to come on random internet message boards and blab about my salary. I find those who tend to throw salary figures around to those around them are either exaggerating or are monumentally insecure about themselves.
Yes, we know: you moved out west and the sun shines out of your arse. Do you actually have anything else to talk about or do you just go on and on about how you moved out west and make omgsomuchmoney to everyone you encounter in any given day? I know people who make half as much as you, yet are at least twice as interesting. Jesus.
RSVPS
: Ivan One Ball (06/13, 4:37PM)
“I mis-measure the fairway.”
Putting the primitive Ukrainian-English aside, I believe that if you read my post over more carefully you’ll find the reference was to baseball, not golf. But then in Ukraine, neither is particularly popular since they interfere with the national pass time, sadistic brutality doled out in equal measure to friend and foe alike. Go fuck yourself.
: The Monstercock 5000 (5:08PM)
As a member in good standing of the marginal , interchangeable and occupationally subservient pink collar industry, how would you possibly know what is, and what is not, a “professional?” You must remember to keep in your place.
(5:16PM)
“What the fuck else is there to do when you are a retired philosophy Ph.D.?
Well, there’s always thinking, something which is beyond your obviously limited capabilities. While typing up your boss’ letters, do you fap, fap, fap in time to the music of the keyboard? Is it true that, upon promotion, some secretaries’ desks come equipped with dildos for their personal pleasuring? In those cases, is the wearing of panties optional or is the split-crotch variety preferred in order to prevent staining the furniture? Fappity, fap, fap!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
I’ve paid 20 an hour for a carpenter to build a deck and he had skills and brought his own tools. I thought it was fair as it was cash, tax free with paid lunch. Lawn mowing… maybe 15/hr. provided you can walk in a straight line. If you get 20/hr. great for you! Not worth it in my opinion.
no fool seems hesitant to join your hareem, MM. Poor Svengali; your Trilby is surely out there, hiding amongst the Halifax Underclass. Until then, console yourself with images of a porcine wall-eyed blonde in little black bikini while working your own “pink collar”.
I got a fever, and the only prescription is more of you going and fucking yourself.
More leather for fore-play.
And that folks is how the rich still keep getting richer.
Yours truly.
RSVP
: Ivan One Ball (06/14, 9:38AM)
“Poor Svengali: your Trilby is surely out there, hiding amongst the Halifax Underclass.”
no_fool, are you going to take that? Aren’t you going to take umbrage at One Ball calling you the name of a hat? Get out that bat! Bat him on his hat!
Your “images of a porcine, wall-eyed blonde in (a) little black bikini,” while evocative, were elusive. I trust you were not besmirching PK’s good name. PK, are you there? Take out your bat and bat One Ball on his ball.
I have another prescription for your fever: Go fuck yourself. That’s probably how you got the fever in the first place. It’s “the hair of the dog” sort of thing. Try not to overdo it this time.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
Sowwrry, I missed ya’ll messages, I was out backin my shit up on da dance floor last night, not sitting at a computer. Gotta have balance in your life. Yes, I earn slightly below 20 bones — 19 in fact. But whatta’ya expect in this economy of cheap-ass employers. Furthermore, I am Womyn. We have an extra struggle to bust our heads up through da glass ceiling. Don’t forget I’m still makin’ 77 cents on e’rry man’s doll hair. These are the types of injustices which lead me into the legal field. I have experienced a lot in my years; through my education and yes, PK through my struggles in the clutches of psychiatry. Yeah, they tried to label me bipolar. They drugged me. The drug-induced psychosis was caused by the SRRI medications prescribed to me by doctors. I fired my shrinks, I haven’t taken a pill in 4 years. Madness is genius, bitches. Ivan got his ball in a knot over this bitch, He must be da lawn-mower man. The jolly green ginger lawn mower shouldn’t be questioning the intelligent and very glamourous no fool. Montrealman, *wink* how you doourn? I always enjoy your philoshophical insights on various topics. You should save them and turn your compilation of theses into a manuscript.
No possible way this ends well:
http://static.uloz.to/cdn/J/Y/e/xJYeagw.64…
Disclaimer: Montrealman not exactly as illustrated.
MM, “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat. And the injunction that you go fuck yourself.
Perfesser like doggin’ de ebonays.
RSVPS
: no_fool (06/14, 3:46PM)
I’m doourn good, no_fool. Was that *wink* a come-on – were you sexually aroused but unfulfilled at the dance last night? – or did you get some of that doll hair in your eye? Yes, as you point out, my philosophical insights into various topics are rather good, aren’t they. In my view they provide a sorely needed reflective dimension to this site which, clearly, is otherwise an intellectual wasteland. Do you think The Coast might run them as a serial? Anyway, don’t stop batting One Ball’s ball.
: Ivan One Ball (4:27PM)
Don’t you think it will end well? If I interpret their facial expressions correctly both seem to be enjoying themselves intensely – particularly “de ebonay” – but, of course, I could be mistaken. However, judging by her girth her partner – who incidentally bears no resemblance to me – must have excellent genital extension but in these matters once again conjecture is really all that we have.
Your offer of “blood, toil, tears and sweat” rings a bell. Were you quoting someone? If so, in future you must really try to close your quotation marks. Otherwise the reader experiences not only a lack of closure but even a degree of readerly vertigo. You must try harder.
Now, go fuck yourself.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
“Ask not, what your country can do for you. Ask why Montrealman is not going and fucking himself.”
I pleasure myself in hallways.
$60 ???? I think I would let it go wild.
RSVP
: Ivan One Ball (9:17AM)
Pleasuring yourself in hallways, particularly with only one ball, cannot be considered an adequate response to the request to do what you can for your country.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
Uhhh, MM, I’m not a secretary. Not sure where you got that idea. Senility kicking in, perhaps?
And I know enough to know your blue waffle has flared up, again. You’re awfully obstinate, lately.
@ PK, IKNORITE . I mean, MM may have his positive points but I find his use of personal information grating. Really, my balls are nothing to do with him.
“The only thing we have to fear is Montrealman not fucking himself”
A something as something
Ivan the lawn-mowing Eunuch and Pretty pink collar kitty the retail sales clerk jelly cuz they ain’t got a PhD like us. Dat’s right, I gotz a Pretty, Hot & Delicious Degree. Throwin’ that hairy eyeball atchu MM. You ain’t felt blood, toil, tears and sweat till I take you for a ride like a Harley down a bumpy road. Make ya head spin!
The blood and tears part is eminently believable.
PhD making $19/hr… Sounds about right.
I’d really like to know where this idea that I’m a secretary came from.
I have two degrees and a professional designation and I’ve gone out on my own and have started my own business. Before I went out on my own, I had positions with my own secretaries. Two of them, actually.
I had planned on doing a PhD about ten years ago and came to the decision it would’ve been a waste of time with the ridiculously slim job prospects (unless I wanted a career slinging coffee or driving a cab).
Sounds like I was right if you’re really on the level, no fool.
PK and I, we ain’t jelly.
Although, I’m willing to bet that at least one of no fool’s baby daddies goes by the street name “Mint Jelly”
-cuz, when chile support due, dat fragrant muhfuggah is allus on de lam!
You know what’s hilarious, Ivan?
I know people without any degrees who make piles more than dr fool.
Even as a co op STUDENT almost a decade ago I was making more than dr fool!
Ever look at the job postings for government secretaries? Most make more than dr fool and require a grade 12! Haha, solid educational path choice, ya fool. All that time and money you could’ve spent working and making money/building up a pension was obvs well worth it! I sure am ‘jelly’!
RSVPS
: Monstercock 5000 (06/15, 4:06PM)
“Uhh, MM, I’m not a secretary. Not sure where you got that idea. Senility kicking in, perhaps?”
Well, I’ll be blowed. Not a secretary , eh? As I have pointed out before, when I read the comments I listen to the authors’ minds at work and infer, usually correctly, the intellectual depth (if any) of the writer. Reading your comments I felt sure that you were a secretary, perhaps for a down-market marginal employer – perhaps selling advertising space in a local hunting and fishing magazine – but it appears I was wrong. Now I’m beginning to wonder if you feet hurt towards the end of the day, standing as you do behind the stocking counter at Target. But your comment regarding my senility has some point. Reading all this shit on Bitch has resulted in a degree of mental deterioration which can easily be mistaken, so I am told, for senility. In any case, have you used the Monstercock lately – your cutting edge dildo – to relieve what is clearly considerable sexual tension as indicated by your throbbing blue waffle? Write back soon with a full description.
: Ivan One Ball (4:45PM)
“IKNORITE”? Does that refer to a condition frequently experienced by those possessing only one ball? Anyway, a sensitive and insightful comment for Monstercock upon which, always mindful of my manners, I shall refrain from commenting.
” no_fool (5:21PM)
Another excellent post NF. Let me be the first to congratulate you on obtaining your Ph.D.
There can be little doubt that One Ball and the retail sales clerk are jealous of our intellectual pre-eminence but one must expect that sort of thing when one has scaled the heights of academic achievement. Congratulations once again. Looking forward to that ride on the Harley!
: Monstercock 5000 (9:47PM; 06/16, 8:14AM)
“Ph.D. making $19/hour … sounds about right.”
Did you read that, NF? But here’s Monstercock (06/13, 9:45PM) berating MissNywoie who claims to be making over 100K out west: “I know people who make half as much as you, yet are twice as interesting. Jesus.” Clearly, the amount of money one makes is of little concern to Monstercock. Indeed, she sounds like a philosopher, someone after my own heart. Let’s call her Monstercock (#1).
But wait! Here comes Monstercock (#2) who planned on doing a Ph.D ten years ago but – get this – “came to the decision it would’ve been a waste of time with the ridiculously slim job prospects (unless I wanted a career slinging coffee or driving a cab)”. Can this be the same Monstercock who berated MissNywoie, NF?
Who do you think the real Monstercock is, NF? I think I can guess, can’t you? Like I said NF, one can expect this sort of thing when people like us have scaled the heights of academic achievement. It doesn’t take long for that altruistic mask to fall away, revealing the materialistic money-grubber beneath.
Get that Harley started, NF! I’m on my way!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
“Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall. And Montrealman, go fuck yourself”
My feather goes Tuesdays.
Wal Mart had an awesome mower with a bag for a little over $200 oversized rear wheels and all.
Oh noes the blue waffle called me dumb! Whatever will I do without intellectual validation from some creep on the internet!
I found this article especially for you, blue waffle. Hopefully it will help get rid of what I can only imagine (especially by your attitude around here as of late) terrible pain and insufferable odour. http://healthypair.net/blue-waffles-diseas…
RSVPS
: Ivan One Ball (06/16, 10:24AM)
Did Ronnie say that about Montrealman as well? I can’t believe it. Do you believe that, NF?
: Monstercock 5000 (1:32PM)
I read your attachment with interest, you creep, and was confirmed in my view that the blue waffle was a particularly female condition featuring a “different type of bacteria and fungi growing on vaginal lips.” While bacteria are not normally visible, did you notice any fungi growing in the anal area as pictured? In spite of your frequent and vigorous use of Monstercock 5000, your cutting-edge dildo, is there is the possibility that your condition was caused by “using dirty masturbation products”? Write back soon with full details.
Do you have any thoughts on this, NF?
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
Haha Annie’s actually resorted to using the whole ‘I know you are but what am I’ retort!
Oh the laffs!
Do you have any thoughts on this, Ivan?
“I have a dream.
That Montrealman should go fuck himself.
Tell me, does anybody else picture the loud stupid black mare from TMZ when reading no fool’s version of Sylvan Learning Center Ebonics.
http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/IBLovlqemXg/hqdefau…
Actually, I kind of picture a fat version of Propecia the Crack Hoe, to be perfectly honest, Uncle Vanya.
Pretty pink collar kitty, How do you know so much about Government secretaries if you ain’t one? You have 2 secretaries? You must be really incompetent to need 2 people to do your work for you. I thought you owned a business? Is it a successful business? The guy who digs clams and sells them for 5 bucks a bag from a truck on the side of the road has a successful bidnezz. Zero overhead – good profit margin. Most new retail shops however don’t even turn a profit in the first 5 years. In fact, most are in debt up to their eyeballs. So what are you REALLY making PK? And did you graduate at the top of your class, magna cum laude? If not, then no you really AIN’T on my level.
Ivan: I don’t have any chilliens. I would rather have a career. And I fucking HATE kids.
Montreal Man – my one and only, Yes it seems the blue waffle is a female condition – though I had never heard of it until the Pretty ‘Pink Collar’ Kitty submitted her Web MD search. The article says it is a “consequence of improper hygiene which can be easily dealt with by improving the hygiene”. So wash that Monstercock 5000 with sanitizer before ramming it into your hungry mucus membranes, PK.
Propecia’s funnier.
Smarter, as well.
RSVPS
: The Shrew (06/16, 3:35PM)
“The whole ‘I know you are but what am I retort’ “? What can that possibly mean? Anyway, I know you can’t help sucking One Ball’s ball but won’t you please do it out of sight? Your little clique is nauseating. Now, if you don’t mind, please go fuck yourself.
: Ivan One Ball (5:54PM)
Would that have been a wet dream, One Ball? A very racial comment about NF by the way but then Ukes are not known for their sensitivity to other cultures. Anyway, I believe it’s time for you to go fuck yourself, perhaps to a fantasy about Marin Luther King. That should begin your long journey back to cultural rehabilitation.
: no_fool (06/17, 6:46AM)
An excellent comment, nf. You sure gave it to The Shrew, but do you really think they have a “magna cum laude” at her on-line business college? I don’t think they’d be even able to translate the expression.
And you’re on the money again with the cause of The Shrew’s blue waffle – definitely a matter of using dirty masturbatory products. She’s got to use that sanitizer on her dildo before, as you delightfully put it, “ramming it into your hungry mucus membranes, PK.” An excellent volley, nf. I couldn’t have said it any better myself. Keep up the good work!
I’ll be watching your back for any “Clique” sneak retaliations, nf. Have no fear, Montrealman is here!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
“If I should die,
think only this of me,
That there’s some corner of a foreign field
where Montrealman is fucking himself.”
A waffle for hoodrats.
With all this talk of people telling others to go f&%k themselves…I’m beginning to think I’m missing out on wonderful trips to far away exotic and/or erotic places. Is this a place where one would find relief or would it be nothing but a place for frustration? If it’s the latter, I’ll gracefully decline as my place of servitude is frustrating enough.
RVSVPS
: Ivan One Ball (06/17, 9:34AM)
I understand that there’s a corner of that foreign field reserved for those, like you, with only one ball. Now, go fuck yourself.
: Klyde (10:02AM)
No, it is not a place where one could find relief but only frustration with the possible exception of The Shrew and her dildo which she employs with both gusto and abandon. The injunction to go fuck herself is, of course, superfluous. What a creep!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
I know how much government secretaries make because I’ve posted them in the past.
Also, Fool, your reading comprehension sucks: read my post again. I had secretaries BEFORE I started my own business. I had a lot of responsibility and required support as such.
“We are the hollow men.
We are the stuffed men.
Except for Montrealman.
He’s one of the self-fornicating men.”
A Prufrock as Wasteland.
Did you guys know that no_fool is really a 120lb white guy from bedford and MM is really a failed government experiment that would be an envoy to russia so he could escalate tensions with his meaningless bullshit and start WW3?!. Now that they’ve teamed up I just want to start singing “They’re pinky and the brain brain brain brain!… GNARF!!”
Yes. But it’s fun to pretend.
Now I’ve got the earwig.
…they’re laboratory mice,
their genes have been spliced.
They’re kinky, now Montrealman can go fuck himself”
MM is incapable of “fucking himself”. He has evolved far above the tiresome act of fucking one’s self, transcended if you will. It is believed the he, and people like him, walk around in a constant, tantric state of orgasm just from the mere thought of their superiority. Therefore, fucking one’s self would be redundant at best!!!
oops, that should read “that he,…”
I think Annie’s so cranky, lately, because his blue waffle’s flaring up and he CAN’T fuck himself whilst reading his previous posts because the stench makes him pass out before he manages to get just a little excited.
RSVPS
Anything in the mailbag this morning?
Nah, just the usual One Balls, The Shrews, The Illiterates, The Rednecks and, of course, The Cognitively Challenged who can all go fuck themselves, whether severally or collectively being entirely irrelevant.
Quel ennuyeux! (That’s French, buds, for “How Boring!”)
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
I don’t understand why personal information is being used again 🙁
You want personal information?
“Monstrealman gone for his afternoon nap.
Little hands busy in dear little lap.
Hush now, hush now, keep this news to yourself.
The pervo perfesser is frigging himself”
-Maya Angelou – 05-2014
Some retired high school teachers have way too much fucking time on their hands. Now, excuse me, while I pull my tattered underclass quilt over my head to fondle my civil service pension cheque – quelle horreur!
RSVPS
: Ivan One Ball (06/18, 10:19AM)
Maya Angelou, eh? I didn’t think xenophobic, misogynist one-balled Ukes ever read her. When you’re around her I sure bet the canary sings.
: The Bull Dyke (10:41AM)
Well it beats being a retired laundromat assistant.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
“By the shores of Gitchee Gumee,
Next door to the Piggly-Wiggly.
Heap big Medicine Man from Hochelaga
One hands petroglyph of Lady Gaga.
In forest primeval we keep things discrete.
But this old shaman likes jerking his meat”
Montrealman: “I say fellers. Did you know that my whippets are poetic?”
Lackeys and Sycophants: “The deuce you say. How do you figure that, old cock?”
MM: “Because when they are stretched out in front of the electric fire, they are Long Fellows”
L & S: “Haw, haw. Well done, old fruit. We pronounce that the jape of the season at the Waegwoltic Deb’s Ball.”
Jesus H Christ on a stick. I’ve never EVER seen MM so cranky, before.
Bull Dyke and laundry mat attendant? – lolz – MM, honestly, that’s the best you could do? Is Gumsucks upsetting you with his bowel movement schedules again? Are they continuing to conflict with your own?
One clunk or two, dear boy?
Probably no clunks.
I read that’s a side effect of the blue waffle syndrome.
Would explain the crankiness.
And better a retired silly servant than a PhD forced to teach high school because they couldn’t cut it in higher education.
RSVPS
Good morning chaps! Anything interesting in the mailbag? Oh, oh, here are a couple of that old nauseating in-group clique again. Well, this should be quick.
: One Ball (6/18, 4:57PM)
Not bad, old top, at least for a member of long standing in the Halifax Underclass which accounts, of course, for my not seeing you at the Waeg. Anyway, what I want you to do now is to go fuck yourself.
: The Shrew (7:41PM)
“Jesus H Christ on a stick?” Is that a peculiarly Valley expletive? A bit archaic though, don’t you think? But then, things are always a bit slow there.
(9:5PM)
Well, it wasn’t so much a matter of not being able to cut it in higher education but rather a matter of there not being any posts available in my field in that particular year. But thanks anyway for your kind words. Now, what I want you to do is to … naw, forget it. As is usually the case with shrews, it would be too painful. You know why.
: The Bull Dyke (7:54PM)
Gumsucks? Do you mean Life Sucks? Haven’t heard from him in a long time. Had to block him off my page – he flooded it with his tit shots – before I quit myself. I found it completely mindless. But then I re-connected and use it for rough drafts for my Philosophy of Education blog. Brilliant as usual.
Anyway, my original comment should have read, “Well it beats scraping shit off of second hand clothes.” Frequent chapped hands, I bet. Now, what I want you … No! No! Don’t! I can’t bear the image of The Bull Dyke going at it! God, no!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
“Retired pedagogue sits on the edge of his bed.
Fading eyes closed in serenely bowed head.
Hush, children. Hush. Speak not a word.
Our friend Montrealman is bashing his bird.”
Elizabeth Barrett Browning – Ode to a Grecian Turd.
Ivan, thanks once more for turning my nose into a coffee sprinkler.
Fuck, I wish I had been a laundry mat assistant – then I wouldn’t have spent 25 years listening to the braying of people who thought they were more important than they actually were. MM, you certainly would have been a perfect fit within that group of incompetent dolts.
no no, do go on.
https://1-media-cdn.foolz.us/ffuuka/board/…
this thread has not only gone off the rails, the wheels have fallen off too, love it
So, you spent all that time completing a PhD in fucking philosophy and in the end, no post secondary teaching positions were available to you…
Well THERE’S a shock.
So you ended up teaching high school — something you could’ve done with an undergrad in education.
Uh huh.
Well, I guess you’re the one who has to live in your headspace. The fact that there were basically no teaching positions in History at the post secondary level was a major factor in my decision to not pursue my PhD in the field. I had the interest, but I also like to eat and I don’t really find the idea of living in a cardboard box appealing, so i chose another field of study that not only interested me, but provided viable job prospects, and here I am, out on my own starting my own business. 🙂
RSVP
Hmm, what’s in the mailbag this afternoon? Well, nothing much that requires a comment of mine except for that of The Shrew, so here goes.
I did my Ph.D. in Philosophy of Education at the University of Ottawa while teaching History at the secondary level exce for a year’s residency which is a requirement for the degree and for which I took a year’s leave of absence from my school. So the fact that no positions were open in my field did not mean living in a cardboard box. I already had four degrees – BA (History & Philosophy), B.Ed., M.Ed. (Teaching of History) and an M,A. (Philosophy of Education) – the first two from Halifax universities and the latter two from McGill and so even then I was well over the top of the salary scale based on years of education and teaching experience. So that’s one point. I was not under any harsh economic imperatives, On the contrary, I took the Ph.D. purely on the basis of the challenge coupled, of course, with the love of the subject by which I mean DOING philosophy rather than simply studying ABOUT it. I took to it like a duck to water.
Secondly, I have always felt that at the higher secondary level the students are not yet steeped in pragmatic materialism, engaged in thinking about getting a job and making money and all the rest of it. As a matter of fact the brighter ones, while frequently very intelligent, are as yet unformed in that manner. I have taught briefly at Concordia and my intuitions were confirmed. In addition to the huge size of the class – over 100 students – I felt that I was in a factory and departed the scene quickly. So there we are.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!