Escalators… they move, they’re fun… don’t just stand there!!
I’m tired of getting stuck behind people on escalators who think that just because the stairs are moving, that they shouldn’t also have the climb up or down these steps. Escalators are there to quicken your step, not for you to take a break. If you want a break, take the elevator—they’re usually located RIGHT NEXT to the escalators!
The worst part of this is that either the escalators are too narrow, or fat asses take up the entire width of the escalator, therefore not allowing anyone to continue either up or down by stepping around.
I understand some people have mobility issues, and to those people I say use the fucking elevator!!! That’s what it’s there for. —Put Some Pep in your Step
This article appears in Aug 11-17, 2011.
Calm the fuck down, relax, and enjoy the ride. I usually walk the escalators but I certainly don’t have a conniption fit I get stuck behind someone.
Listen OP, most of us live busy lives and try to fit too much into our days, so if we want to stand still for a 20 second ride on an escalator, leave us alone. So long as we’re standing to one side, shut up; otherwise a simple” excuse me” will suffice! If you’re so deseperate for a workout, by a stairmaster for your basement!
It’s been a while since we had one of these.
If I could walk, even with a mobility issue, I would use the escalator. And when you looked at me with your pissy look, or tried to elbow your way past me rudely, I would trip you with my cane and laugh as you rolled to the bottom.
Why don’t you try chilling out, OP. You may live longer.
Entitled twat.
Morning Bader. How were the ribs?
And yeah OP, I’m fairly certain that freedom of choice applies to escalators too. As in, It’s my fucking body and I’ll do what I want to with it and you don’t feature in the decision making process, at all.
You fucking little knob. I have knee issues therefore cannot climb a goddamn escalator so you can suck the curlies off my mud flaps. People like you are what’s wrong with this world – in a fucking rush with nowhere to go.
well then you should obviously be getting out of their self-entitled way TTFN….
duh….
http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS…
what ttfn said http://getfancy.files.wordpress.com/2009/0…
Hey asshole OP, escalators are moving stairs designed for people to stand there and for the machine to do the work. In other words fuckwad, they are for standing on, not climbing. If you don’t like it then take the fucking stairs.
I hope the next person going up an escalator farts in OB’s mouth.
Comrade Sheik Ivan- the ribs were amazing. Honey garlic, and plentiful.
TTFN- your jugs mske MY knees hurt!
Fat- see the Bateman/Reynolds switcheroo movie. If you enjoy a good fart in the mouth, you’ll enjoy this movie!
Wp
It’s not so difficult really. Standers to the right. Walkers to the left. Where appropriate. If everyone stood to the right so the walkers could pass on the left we wouldn’t be reading this bitch. It is so commonplace in other cities that one wonders why it isn’t practised here.
ribs? what ribs? did i miss something?
Wheelie was getting a delivery of some good home cookin’. LLLaaaarrrrggghhhhhhhh!
In two weeks I’ll be in the Limestone city, getting some of the same.
I don’t get why all you people slowly walking down escalators, getting in my way.
hurry the fuck up…. jerks.
http://www.foundshit.com/pictures/sports/e…
So, just because someone has a mobility issue, it means they have to wait in line to use the elevator because “That’s what it’s there for”?! Fuck you, you pretentious dick! Everyone knows that the escalator is faster overall, than waiting for the elevator. Especially if the person is only going up one floor. If the person is able to ride the escalator, then there is bugger all you can do about it besides shut your gaping mawe and bear it. If you’re in THAT much of a rush that you can’t wait the extra 5-10 seconds for someone to ride the escalator to the top or bottom, (as you obviously appear to be), then YOU move that ass and take the fucking stairs. “That’s what they’re there for!”
Idiot
Whatever happened to saying, “Excuse me.” If you’re in such a hurry just ask the person ahead of you to step aside instead of complaining that they’re trying to ruin your day on purpose merely for the sake of being a hater, hater!
If people just stood to the right there would be no need to say “excuse me”. Escalator use is similar to sidewalk use. It is rude to block the whole thing while using it. Single file when there is someone behind you who wants to move at a faster pace. But because there are always going to be people who don’t get it, I agree, a simple “excuse me” works wonders.
Two bitches in two weeks. Wow, you just can’t stand to wait for a few moments, can you?
Move That Ass – Going to Heaven – Forgot to Leave Earth
Put Some Pep in your Step – Too Young to Go with You
Frig, that’s a joke that writes itself 😉
If I wanted to walk I would have taken the stairs. I will move to right to let self-centered pricks by…
Oceanchick, there a lot of escalators in HRM that are not wide enough for 2 people (i.e. Barrington Place Shops). Maybe, you’re suggesting that people “holding” the walkers up can spread their legs wide to allow the people in a rush to crawl under them?
Wheelie: Now if I wore this, your knees wouldn’t stand a chance, buddy:
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/–3yZHhn…
haha, nice booby holder ttfn^^meeting you was beyond awesome, we have so much in common. thanks for the lift buddy
Lick a nut fucko!!! I live to piss people like you off, makes me laugh when I here muttering behind me on an escalator. I even wait until my toes touch the grate at the top before I walk even 1 step. Sometimes I even check my phone for messages at the top if I think it will piss you off more. Lol, stupid douchebag is in a hurry.
Meeting you was fantastic, Painey – I had been hoping you’d show. I got great vibes off the moment I met you. Yep, I think we have one hell of a lot in common – scary shit, huh? It was fun to meet Mrs. Ivan as well – such a nice gal – she and Ivan together are cuter than a hamster’s ear.
Awwwwwwww *blush* *stammer* Gosh.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_jTBpVFXDlEQ/Sa1b…
SOBova loved meeting you jokesters as well. And to think, she was askeered from all the things I told her. MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA >: )
that’s because were both good witches ttfn *cackle* and we both love these guys http://www.tailofthesnake.com/pgallery/var…
lol you said it PG/TTFN, I get you guys confused sometimes! I was thiking about going to the summit but it was such a nice day I forgot all about it and went the beach.
that’s otay we represented!!! everyone that sat near us, moved tables ’cause we were too jocular and loud^^
OP, imagine the fun if one of those fat asses tripped and the escalator’s teeth started chewing the fat off them.
BRoc: if you had read my posts you would likely have gotten the ‘where appropriate’ part. Obviously single width escalators would not fall into this category. Nor would I even expect to walk on an occupied single use escalator. Give your head a shake man! We are talking doulble width escalators with room to pass. I fail to see the problem. Or the need for goofshow attitude like SHITty-D’s. In other cities “stand right-walk left” is routine. Seems somebody forgot to tell the folks here.
If only they still put the shoe in the lucite box like when I was a kid… TAKE CARE ON THE ESCALATOR! First off, fuck off, OP, buy a backpack rocket if you want to get to another floor that quick. I will take my sweet time standing there, and so will the young kids I bring with me.
Others brought up the “excuse me” thing; I love it when these ignorant douche bags come up behind me and huff and sigh. Sorry, that is douche-speak and I was brought up differently. The only thing less common than common sense these days is common courtesy.
The escalator is a no brainer – if it’s wide, step to the right – but if the fucker’s narrow, I’m gonna plant my mitts on both railings. What drives me mental is getting on an elevator crammed with people and their overstuffed goddamn backpacks. When they spin around to talk to each other, I bounce around like a fucking pinball.
Sounds like OP should take the fire escape if he/she is in that much of a hurry.
My only escalator bitch is when kids are running down the up escalator and vice versa. No parents to be seen and they will plow into you if you don’t edge over.
troodon, I am always watchful and they’d get a surprise. They go around or… they stop.
but then again, if you get stuck behind a nice female ass. who will complain, not guys? i have seen some real nice bums in my travels on those moving stairs, and will never bitch about my enjoyable little ride. no fun in an elevator, where everyone is so cramped and stinky.
The really funny thing about this bitch is escaltors were introduced to the world as rides in amusement parks
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Escalator#His…
With that in mind believe it or not escalators are in fact designed to be riden not walked on.
As for the elevators, they are usually beside the stationary stairs NOT the escalators. Hey OB why not take the stairs? They give a better work out and are, believe it or not, usually faster than walking up an escalator.
Instead of focusing on walking on the escalator, take the time to scout the area for nice azz. Malls can be full of visual treasures
that’s a beautiful cat george, is it yours?
Visual Treasures indeed, G.V. Discretely following the Paulblarts around can also be entertaining. These guys encounter as many examples of reverse Darwinism as the average Corrections Officer or Bus Driver. George Romero knew what he was doing when he set Dawn of the Dead in a mall , I tell ya what.
“OP, imagine the fun if one of those fat asses tripped and the escalator’s teeth started chewing the fat off them.”
NOt as fun as if you tripped and the teeth shredded you open and a puddle of rainbow cat pee.
“Escalator use is similar to sidewalk use.”
Since when and says who? I never heard that rule or read it anywhere. And a lot of escalators are made single file and not like the ones you find at a mall.