Honey, why do you pride yourself on not going with the flow and getting married like your peers? You stay single and have casual encounters with men all throughout your 20s. You talk about being happy that you’re single in your 20s but plan to settle down in your 30s. You go on and on about how marriage is not for you, but I think it is. I think you’re pissed off that you haven’t found the right guy and you just hide it behind all of this “Fuck marriage! I wanna enjoy the single life! Enjoy your prison!” attitude. Honestly, honey, all of your same-age relatives and old classmates are paired up somehow in a committed relationship. Your younger brother, aged 21, has been in a relationship for 2 years. Your younger sister, aged 23, is engaged. You’re 28 and still single, just dating or having friends w/benefits! Honestly, grow up. You clearly haven’t developed the ability to function in a normal loving relationship. You’re dysfunctional and you will still be just ‘fucking around’ in your 30s. That’s because no one wants to be a slut in the long term. You ask, what is everyone’s hurry, when one of your old classmates announces she’s engaged on Facebook. You brag about not conforming to this. But I hate to break it to you, honey, people around you are growing and becoming good people raising families and a good home life, while you’re still just working and partying and sleeping around like you just turned 20. —Happily Married Gal
This article appears in Apr 7-13, 2011.
boy Angelina… you never let it go.
Jennifer’s happy being single….
wow you should really mind your own business “honey”. Who are you to say getting married and having kids is the end all and say all? Everyone has a different path in life and just settling is absolutely rediculous for the sake of everyone else is doing it. I think everything will eventually fall into place organically for the person you are belittling so enjoy your wedded bliss and don’t force your choice on anyone else especially someone you refer to as a friend.
Oooooh this bitch makes my blood fucking BOIL.
I’m running over to get something to eat right now, but prepare for the rath of PK when she gets back.
And just as a preview: OP, you are a C-U-N-T.
Who gives a fuck abou your opinion OB. People are free to get married or not to get married. If you’re so happy in your marriage why are you pissing over someone who is happy the way they are.
“You clearly haven’t developed the ability to function in a normal loving relationship.” – Then why are you wishing her on somebody?
How old are you OB?
20-30? Pregnant yet?
70? Break a hip yet?
why should you buy a cow, just to get some milk? o.p., marriage is not for everyone, while yours might work, many don’t, and can get quite fucking messy. i have been there, and as such, would never have done the first one, had i known what the outcome would have been. but we cannot see the future, just learn from our past.
as to your friend going out and getting laid when she wants to, with a different guy all the time, what is wrong with that? if she makes sure she is safe, where is the harm? i mean come on now, it’s her life, and she is free to use it as she sees fit, without you or anyone, laying on a guilt trip and marriage is great shit. mind your own business, and let her do what she wants. i presume she is of legal age, so butt the fuck out, willya.
btw o.p., i’m up for a nighter with your friend if she wants it? pass on the old suckster’s name.
I can’t even figure out where to start…
1) Why is it OK for guys to not “settle down”, but not for women? just look at our language – men are “bachelors” until they’re dead, but women become “spinsters” after age 30, or, as the OB likes to say “a slut in the long term”.
2) Why do you care? Methinks the PB doth protest too much. Jealous? If this were someone you actually *cared* about, you’d be either happy they’re happy, or genuinely worried and trying to help them with whatever issues they *actually* have vs. the ones you *think* they have.
3) Not everyone gets married, not everyone has kids. If this friend was gay would you be throwing in the same arguments? Didn’t think so.
4) Why are you comparing them to their younger family members? Romantic relationships aren’t genetically predisposed.
5) It’s not your business. Period. And even if it somehow *was*, who are you to say she “can’t function” in a “normal healthy relationship”? If your post is any indication, you “can’t function” in a friendship, which also counts as a relationship. F*&^ing hypocrite.
Suckster – even though the first one went horribly wrong, you did it @ the time because you thought it was a good idea.
Would you do it again if it felt “right”? If so, maybe the posting bitcher (PB) can take some solace in the fact that once her hubby realizes she’s angry and bitter, and kicks her ass to the curb, she might find another one someday.
gidget, no first one was good, it was the second one that went to hell. my first wife died, thanks to a druck fucking asshole driver, outside of amhearst in the first 6 months after we got hitched. and life was never the same after that.
i am a frm believer in the idea that if you wanna get hitched go for it, but leave me alone. if i decide to tie the knot again, it will of my choosing, not someone like the o.p.
and you should try to get to next bitcher’s summit, to meet lord sucks, in the flesh. it’ll be a ball.
Sorry, Sucks, been in a similar place, feel for you. Accidental death of a soulmate changes *everything*, forever.
I never personally believed in marriage either, but to everybody’s amazement, I recently tied the knot, not because I *had* to, but because with my hubby, it “felt right” and I actually *wanted to*.
But before this decision, I was SOOOOOOO tired of people like this bitcher who just assume that you can’t be happy unmarried or not in a relationship.
Definitely going to try, depends on the date, suckster. “Have contact info, may travel”… missed having time to bitch/argue onloine, would be nice to bitch/argue in the flesh. 🙂
OP, you are a pontificating twat. Marriage is not for everyone. Many women would rather spend their lives fulfilling other aspects of their life than wait on some fucking dude, ejecting the odd kid and working their holes off to keep the finances running (with the possibility of hubby pissing off with a TH waitress during his mid-life crisis). You assume that a woman is worthless unless she has a dick to fondle and is skilled at picking up socks. I simply despise the type of women YOU are, OP – I know many, many single people who were grateful they dodged the matrimonial bullet. You are a smug cunt who should mind your own fucking beeswax.
We don’t argue Gidget. We eat, drink and laugh. And talk about Sebastian and Montrealman. Sort of like the UN General Assembly but beneficial.
And aparently get sunburned. LOL.
im excited for PK’s rath! because i usually totally agree with what that kitty kat is sayin’..and i can tell im gunna agree this time, as well.
wooo bring it on PK 😀
rarrr!
You know what? I WAS going to bitch this c-unt out, but this bitch makes me too fucking pissed off to bother.
Ever see the stats on divorces? Good chance that YOU, OP, will end up divorced and alone. Do you know how expensive a divorce can be? You realize that some marriages last a matter of weeks or months? I wouldn’t wish any marriage to end, but I hope your husband leaves you one day so YOU can end up an old hag all alone. And when that happens, I hope your “friend” is the first one to point and laugh.
Aw, come on, PK, with the endearingly sunny personality and rational arguments posited by this OP, she’ll be married to her husband FOREVER!
(Gawd, that made me throw up in my mouth a little).
Ok fuck it:
Who the FUCK do you think you are, OP? Huh?
Seriously WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE YOU STUPID BITCH?
OOOOOH your friend isn’t married in her 20s and her younger family members are. SO. THE. FUCK. WHAT?
Maybe this person *gasp* really *is* happy being single? You are SEETHING with neediness, you fucking bluewaffle’d twat. You’re the worst type of female, OP: the type who can’t be alone — the type who needs a MAN to function. And you have one big fucking entitlement issue if YOU think YOU have any say or right to say anything about anyone else’s marital status. Chances are, ol’ hubby of yours’ll get sick and fucking tired of your neediness and will leave you. You got a 50/50 chance of making it, bitch. And I’m not optimistic that you’re in the positive 50%. In fact, I’d shit my pants if you made it past the 3-5 year mark, you stupid snatch.
Sounds like YOU are the one your friend should be bitching about — she seems to have her head on straight and knows that getting married for the sake of getting married (which, I’m guessing is what YOU did) is fucking STUPID and is happy living her life the way she wants. Sounds like YOU are the one who needs to grow the fuck up.
And not all of us who are single have problems functioning in relationships. SOME of us *gasp* don’t need to date or be with someone in any capacity to be a whole complete person.
You are a sad, sad excuse of a woman, OP. I think I feel pity for you than anything.
But that won’t stop me from telling you to go suck a diseased cock.
“bluewaffle’d twat” is now my second favorite quote of all time.
PK felt a little personally insulted.
It’s true your friend will probably still be “running around” into her 30s … and is this a bad thing, no, it isn’t, as long as she know what works for her!
However, I will say, I know people who are so contrary to marriage that they continually put it down! To them I also say MYOB.
Thumbs up PK!
What is this? The conformity bitch? Why must everyone follow the same path in life? Some are perfectly happy NOT being in a relationship. I think if the single lady in question had met someone who knocked her socks off she wouldn’t be interested in anyone else. Why should she settle for less just to appease her so-called friends? She may never meet someone who makes her want to settle down. Many people choose NOT to be part of a couple and are perfectly happy doing so. Live and let live.
Well, yeah, donk, I’m not about to run and marry the first bozo that comes along just for the sake of getting married. And that’s what this zit on a FUPA is suggesting her friend do because OH NOES if a women is single she must be horribly unhappy and incomplete and THERE MUST BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH HER OHNOESOHNOESOHNOESSSS and that the Marriage Fairy will make all her problems and inadequacies disappear (yeah, tell that to all the divorced bitchers on the board). Because if you’re not married or even couple’d YOU MUST OMG BE SOMEHOW INADEQUATE. And socially dysfunctional! OH FUCKING NOES!
If the Bluewaffle’d Twat wanted to write a bitch, perhaps she should’ve just framed it in the “stop putting down marriage” perspective instead of figuring she was OH SO ENTITLED to comment on someone else’s life decisions.
Perhaps she’s just jealous that her friend is getting some great dick and she’s stuck with the same boring old cock. Sure sounds like it. Why else would she write a novel-length bitch to justify her stupid marriage at the expense of someone who seems perfectly happy?
People who are truly happy with themselves don’t tend to attack others for their life decisions.
You need a kick in the box, OP.
Why is she making you so upset though? It doesn’t matter what she thinks …
Like, I don’t get it.
“Perhaps she’s just jealous that her friend is getting some great dick and she’s stuck with the same boring old cock. ” That’s really rich …
“Why else would she write a novel-length bitch to justify her stupid marriage …” um …
Meh, you’re just riled up. So whatevs
Yeah, what everyone else said. I felt like going off on a massive rant as well, but it seems pretty much everyone here got it right :). Marriage is not for me and I will not think that I am sub-human for it. I don’t know that I believe that this is even a real bitch, it’s just that RETARDED and reeks of CUNT.
Pack your bags Kitty. You just been drafted
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3122/311811…
Beautiful vitriol by the way. made my flippin afternoon it did.
Screeeeee!
hawt damn, i agree i agree i agreeeeeeeeeeee!
like a lot of things, marriage is over-fucking-rated anyways. i PERSONALLY am in no rush to get my wagon hitched. if ever. but only time will tell. people’s ideals change the older they get.
i feel like i should quote sex and the city right now…but i will refrain 😛
Supervages like the OP are why I moved away in my early 20’s – I was SO tired of everyone asking when I was going to settle down and have kids. You know what? I had a great career, several good relationships, and alot of years happily single, doing things I wanted to do when I wanted to.
Now all those douches who were beating down my decision to not get tied down young are fat and unhappy losers with at least 1 divorce each under their belts, trying to make ends meet as single mothers with no job skills.
The OP says “why do you pride yourself on not going with the flow and getting married like your peers?”
Wow, ’cause that’s a reason to get married, because you’re “going with the flow and doing what your peers are doing”. If they all jumped off a bridge, would you do it too, OP? Yeah, you would.
BAM!
No no it’s “Boom, roasted”
Hay, I’m not going off on her because she’s married. If she wants to get married/divorced/jump off a bridge, I really don’t give a shit, but when others disparage the life choices of others and feel they’re entitled to do so, well I get a little riled up.
Most of my good friends are married, getting married and/or have babies. And not ONE has said ANYTHING to me regarding my singleness. Because they’re happy I’m happy! And I’m happy they’re happy. And IF any of them ever do go through a breakup of their marriage, well I’ll be pleased as punch to be there for them for whatever they need to get through it. Because that’s what you do when you’re a good friend. You don’t write an anonymous bitch disparaging their lifestyle and call them a slut because they don’t want what you want/have. That shit just ain’t right.
Wow, I think this is the first time EVERYONE has agreed about a bitch. And EVERYONE has agreed that you Op, are a twat.
Who says she isn’t happy single? Marriage isn’t for everyone, and if someone decides to be free of it, who cares? IMO People shouldn’t settle down in a relationship until they are comfortable and able to be happy for themselves. How the hell can you make anyone happy if you can’t make yourself happy?
Right fucking on, Gidget. OP has a lemming mentality and deserves a size 18 ski boot driven into the ol’ clam slot.
some marriages are like deseases, you get one, get rid of it, then you get a relapse, and you hurt worse than the first time.
but to each their own little universe. if the o.p. is happy in hers fine. but she should remember, that someday, the honeymoon might have to end.
OMG, This&That, you’re right. The universe is about to implode – the bitchers all agree! Run for your lives! LOL
Also, thanks guys 😉
Esp you, Ivan 🙂
My *real* problem with this bitch is that OP is trying to make it sound like she gives a rat’s ass about her “friend”, when she clearly does not.
Married, unmarried, gay, straight, happy, unhappy, if this is really a “friend”, the OP should be supportive.
EXACCCCCCCTLY, FA. EXACTLY.
I’m all for a relationship and/or marriage (and obv a baby since I’m expecting, haha) right now, if I were to meet the right person. And I haven’t met the right person yet. And I don’t think you can judge whether or not you have long term chemistry when you first meet/couple with someone. It’s a process for me, I’m afraid, and I truly believe that when you find it, you’ll know 🙂
Marriage/coupling, just, in my opinion, can’t be forced.
since I’m expecting … I KNEW IT … are you really ?
Ask the bitchers from summit II 😉 lol
Yeppers, she was drinking only virgin martinis… that’s ’cause apparently it was immaculate conception and everything!
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.…
Fine betch.
Lol
BABEH PK!!!
BABEHH BABEH
and I was like baby baby baby ooh like baby baby baby nooo
Ok I have some names if boy, Justin, if girl Justine.
It makes my blood boil too, PK.
OP, maybe it’s the other way around; maybe you’re just jeleous that your friend has options in her life (and hey, maybe she has the ability to attract more men than you ever did and that burns you; some people settle down only because they finally met someone willing to marry them)!
Speaking as someone who started into back to back long term relationships at age 16, I got free at age 25 and boy, was it nice and did I have fun! I got a master’s degree, travelled, had fun with my friends. And fucked around! I’ve had 2 one night stands in my life and lots of short, fun mini-relationships. Nobody, least of all my friends (learn the definition) ever called me a slut for it! At 30 I finally fell in love again and am now married with a baby, and my husband loves me for everything that made me who I am today. I still have a few friends who are single and in their mid-thirties; they are happy and successful people and I am happy for them. You are pathetic.
Twins. Boy and a girl. Identical (figure THAT one out).
And I’ll use those names if you can guess who the daddeh is 😉
Maternal twins of both genders are very rare but not unheard of. It occurs when in development stage gender traits switch from male to female or vice versa. Congrats PK on your anticipated bundles of joy!
http://www.sangrea.net/free-cartoons/socia…
Gee. Another zed fat joke.
Nice job, jerk.
OP, jealous much? Sounds like the stepford wife is jealous of the city slut. When did you start getting knocked up? Hope you have sufficient income to support them. Maybe she’s been fucking the OP’s husband on the side….hmmmm.
Listen OP, when I was single, I loathed people like you. Because I was happy, I was working on my career, and a family wasn’t in the picture – and it didn’t need to be. Not everyone wants to get married. Lots of people think they don’t want to get married until they meet someone who truly changes their life – but if your friend isn’t meeting someone like that, why the hell are you pushing her to settle down? You think she should settle down with the first dirtbag who is nice to her? I swear, this is half the reason for divorce, people get convinced that they should be at a certain stage of their life at a certain age – really, give it up. “Honey” will decide for herself if and when she wants to get married, as should anyone.
How am I gonna guess the daddy?!? I only know one of your playmates and that’s Fat.
… boy & girl twins can’t be identical. Oh that was a joke? um? yeah? uh?
I don’t believe you. I need proof. Post a tasteful belleh pic, a la RC.
Can’t. Zed’ll make another fat joke.
And since I”m pregnant and hormonal, I’ll probably start crying and shit.
Also: if Fat was my babby’s daddy I’d probably shoot clorox into my uterus.
Well how am I supposed to guess then, ffs.
Devil’s advocate:
OP: “why do you pride yourself on not going with the flow” ….”when one of your old classmates announces she’s engaged on Facebook. You brag about not conforming to this”
Is this single friend constantly boasting about how much better it is that she choose to be single – and not be tied down and harp on you for being married? Then both of you are in the wrong because you should support your friends life choices no matter what.
(But the whole “honey thing made me dislike you a lot! OP”)
PK for crying out loud are you or aren’t you?????
Is Jesus the father?
I read something immaculate before in these posts somewhere.
In that case I’m imagining you as Madonna circa 1991.
“are you or aren’t you?????”
I know eh
LOL the whole “immaculate conception” part should’ve tipped y’all off. No, of COURSE I’m not pregnant. It was a joke at the summit because I hadn’t seen the posts where people asked me if I was pregnant. So everyone said they were going to say I was drinking virgin drinks to perpetuate the idea.
No, unfortunately, PK had a life changing experience (that was traumatic and total bullshit)… it just wasn’t a pregnancy. And that’s all she has to say about that (on the interwebz) *forrest gump voice*
that’s me…
http://scienceblogs.com/startswithabang/up…
i can unpack my bags now then? whew, had me going there for a minute. one of each would have been cool tho kitty. now that my heart attack is calmed down, think i’ll go eat.
But you’re so nice irl 🙁 Why you gotta be like dat [a jerk] on t3h int3rw3bz? 🙁
WTF I HATE YOU. You can’t joke about babies!
http://images.paraorkut.com/img/funnypics/…
Not impressed, hmph!
whoa! i had to read ALL these comments just to stay caught up. i hate when i actually have to work .. AT work 😛
thanks donk, now i got da jbiebs song stuck in mah head pfff
fuck all the fucking fuckers cubed
Hey Painey: Rawk?
no news is good news i guess. been out all day, my backs pingy and i’m starting to see things, but we will rally the troops this eve and go out again. thanks ivan^^
Take care of yourself, don’t strain your back and good luck>: )
PK see what happens when you grind dance. I just got back here so I couldn’t write this before you outted yourself.
Lolz Donk, I’ve never seen anybody flounce on the interweb before 🙂
OP, MYOFB! Tyvm
Alright completely agree with everyone above. What i got from this is that she is more concerned that the person can’t hold down a relationship and using the whole single thing as a coverup, and also might have some jealousy issues with her younger siblings, probably could see through all that and its starting to piss her off. Who knows, either way its flipping stupid and she should mind her own business and let people decide when the hell they want to get married.
REFLECTIONS ON “MARRIAGE RULES”
Predictably, the wolves were out on the poster. Their outrage was scarcely contained. Some were eye-popping in their self-righteousness. How dare she criticize the “life choices” of those who rejected marriage and its responsibilities? Who does she think she is? But – need I say it? – Montrealman sees virtue in her position.
The difficulty, as usual, is the Commenters’ inability to rise above the personal, to see that the object of the post was not so much an attack on their freedom to do as they want (to fuck until their brains drop out) as much as it was a claim that society, if it is to continue in any coherent fashion, requires tradition and continuation which, in the present context, means the institution of marriage.
Three alternative present themselves: (1) Unregulated copulation resulting either in a tidal-wave of illegitimates which, of course, YOU will be required to support or, given the latest in prophylactics, the joy of unending penile and clitoral orgasms or, (2) Regulated copulation where, by design or chance, it results in another tidal-wave of births which are to be housed in in some sort of state Gulag birthing factory or, (3) In the traditional family consisting of a mother and father who raise their off-spring in a nurturing and loving environment.
Those are the choices, darlings. Deal with it.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
Oh Hugoooooo oo oooooo
You are a bitch and I wouldn’t want to be your friend after reading this. Have you ever taken her perspective and realized that yes, perhaps she is sad about not having found “the one” because I’ve gotta tell you, it does suck. It’s not fun to be nearly 30 and not married. It doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with not being able to function in a relationship. There could be many other factors. So FUCK YOU. I feel bad for your husband.
Wholey fuck OB ! ! !
I read your rant & then started reading the comments…All I can say is I find myself agreeing with Pretty Kitty’s comments !
Do you have any idea how fucking unbelievable that is ?
What people decide to do with their lives, is & should always be their choice…& whatever someone else chooses is none of your , my or anyone elses business.
The part of the comment -” people around you are growing & becoming good people “
… fuck , that’s unbelievable ! ! !
She isn’t a ‘good person’ because she hasn’t married & made herself into a copy of you OB !
I am floored.
“I read your rant & then started reading the comments…All I can say is I find myself agreeing with Pretty Kitty’s comments !
Do you have any idea how fucking unbelievable that is ?”
I know More-on. I knooooow.
I feel as though this bitch could’ve caused the universe to blow up… since we all have some consensus on the matter.
… which almost makes me wonder if this is just some fake troll bitch…. Like I really have a hard time believing someone is as stupid as the Bluewaffle’d Twat’d author is fo’ realz.
I’ve had people my our age (30’s – 40’s) tell us “I love my kids, but don’t fucking have kids”. Apparently we’re ‘selfish’ if we want to enjoy our own lives and not burden ourselves with kids. This bitch is along the same lines, I figure.
Ohhh OP Marriage only “Rules” for the first few years “honey”. We’ll all be laughing so hard at the bitch 5 years from now from the poor wed gal who’s now all alone, with four kids, cause your prize “hubby” is banging some 28 year old single “slut”. Believe that.
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.…
Fuck off OP, you’re an idiot. People like you think their self worth is measured only if they can have a ceremony and procreate. Any idiot can do that (you’re obviously proof)
I think you’re a bit jealous that you’re tied down in a shitty marriage with some snot nosed little brats and can’t stand the fact that some people are happy without the trappings of rings and babies.
Ah OP sounds like Anne Coulter and her “nuclear family” … oh snap I went there.
haha…sorry i didn’t get the life manual upon arrival