Those escalators are made for walking and that just what I’ll do. One of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you moronic holiday shoppers who seem to think they’re there so you can take a 40 second break from your clearly exhausting schedule. It would take all of 5 seconds were you to actually walk down the steps, but noooooo! This ain’t the friggin’ Bill Lynch Show, folks -and you’re starting to tick me off. This (to paraphrase Dr. Moriarty) is not danger, it is inevitable destruction. You stand in the way not merely of an individual, but of a mighty organization, the full extent of which you, with all your cleverness, have been unable to realize. You must stand clear, fuckwads, or be trodden under foot.
This article appears in Dec 6-12, 2007.
So, correct me if I’m wrong, but you’re saying that people should walk pn escalators, which are moving stairs? Did you ever think that a lot of people would lose their balance on moving stairs?As far as I knew, escalators were for people to stand on as they went up or down.
I’d say those who are stationary should stand to the right. Then you could rush your idiot ass right past them. I’ve had balance problems for years, buddy, I wish to fuck I could walk up the escalator.
Everywhere else I’ve been the protocol is standees on the right, walkers on the left. Why is that so hard?
People around here don’t understand the concept of “Stand Right, Walk Left”. Would it make a difference if they actually posted these reminders on the escalators for people to use? I doubt it since we have so many signs on the highways stating “Keep right except to pass”, especially on Magazine Hill. Until people start get out of their small town, slow minded, hyper conservative ways they’ll keep hogging the escalators and roads believing that they’re entitled to hold up everyone else.
Surly, calm the fuck down. If you’re that cranks at the damn mall, then do yourself a solid stay the fuck home dude.
Henry Rollins has a spoken word bit about the airport treadmills that shuffle people around. The same could be applied here. Frustrating and hilarious all at the same time.
excellent rant…in the dictionary sense….absolutely unintelligable.five stars for passion, of what, we aren’t sure.
Surly,I had a rant to go back at you about arthritis and the pain associated with it but I thought I would sum it up like this,GO FUCK YOURSELF! I will take up the whole step or two or three if I feel like it. If it makes my constant pain subside for a few seconds, then I am all for it. You can walk without effort so take the friggin stairs next time and leave the escalator for those that need it.I look forward to the day when you will trodden me under foot. Bring it on!