This is to the sorry soul who stole mothers rocking chair off our Halifax front porch: She is not happy and is threatening to work some potent voodoo on the ass in the seat without her permission.
Do yourself a favor, think about it for a minute and then return the chair nicely before she finishes making her little stick doll sitting on a rocker. Regards… —Son
This article appears in Sep 16-22, 2010.
Ooooh voodoo – I bet they’re scared now. Will you be sending zombies next? If it is valuable then bring it the fuck inside at night.
note to cops, be on the lookout for a senior. or someone who is off their rocker, yuk yuk.
If your mother doesn’t knock off the voodoo she will get the green rocking chair back alright – one matchstick sized piece at a time.
You only have 24 hours left to meet our demands and I suggest you use the time productively instead of issuing threats on the internet.
~ The PPPCF (Popular Peoples’ Porch Chair Front)
(not to be confused with the despised Popular Peoples’ Popular Front Porch Chair Front – wankers!!)
LMAO – CE.
I feel bad though…think about it…she’s probably too old to carry in a rocking chair from her porch every night..and I’m sure she loves sitting out in it. As much as it would be really nice if it’s returned, probably not going to happen.
No friggin way. What kind of rocking chair was it? There is now a green rocking chair sitting beside my apartment building, getting in the way of my parking space. It’s an “indoor” rocking chair though, a fabric one. I thought it may be someone in the building just throwing it away, and that still might be true. Just a crazy coincidence maybe :P! Describe it better OP?