Locked doors means you are CLOSED

CLOSING TIME!

“Every time I run over there at like 8:45PM with a late night craving for chocolate or snacks, your doors are closed… The liquor store next door to you doesn’t have this problem.” neighbor lady

What is the issue here? What is the backstory? What is really going on? A superficial reading would lead us to believe that it was simply a matter of the drugstore across the street closing its doors before the posted time and so inconveniencing “neighbor lady” who runs over there to satisfy her late night craving for chocolate or snacks. By contrast, the liquor store next door never does this. They remain open until the time posted for closing has arrived and only then do they close their doors. However, this is to give the bitch only a superficial reading. On a closer reading, however, two issues are seen to arise.

The first relates to businesses that are privately run as opposed to those under government supervision. In the case of the liquor store which is under the control of the provincial government, the rules are strictly observed. No latitude can be given one group of employees in a particular district over another even if business is slow. Indeed, the standardization of hours it is one of the virtues of government operations, particularly in the case of places like liquor stores which are often frequented by late-night carousers.

On the other hand, even if they are part of a chain, drugstores do most of their business during the daylight hours. Their primary purpose is the dispensing of health- care products, including prescriptions, which are written up by doctors whose office hours are also primarily during the day. Items like chocolate and snacks are definitely a sideline and so should not be the primary consideration in determining strict adherence to evening closing times. We can see a certain latitude where such closing times are concerned which are subject to the discretion of the owner rather than government edict.

However, the second issue relates less to the matter of closing times as such and more to the reasons why “neighbor lady” sees fit to browse for chocolates and snacks relatively late at night. The reason, no doubt, lies in the fact that she is a reclusive alcoholic. It is well known that a large, regular intake of booze gives rise to a craving for chocolate and snacks.

The booze is no problem – the liquor store next door doesn’t have the drugstore’s problems with closing times – and so she finds herself cut off from her craving. It is unfair when you think about it. There she is in her stained torn nightgown, slippers out at the tow and run over on the heels, hair hanging in strings down her face, lipstick askew and streaks of mascara coursing down her withered cheeks all the while pounding in an alcoholic frenzy on the drugstore’s doors. Is it any wonder the staff hides and doesn’t let her in?

Unfortunately, the location of the drugstore and liquor outlet were not given. My guess is either Spryfield or Fairview or possibly some squalid part of the North End – aren’t they all squalid? – and certainly not the South End. Of course, it goes without saying that “neighbor lady” is a member of long standing in the Halifax Underclass.

Thank you for your patience and understanding. However, you must also understand that it was more boring for me to write this crap than it was for you to read it.

A pleasure as always.

Cheerio!