If your nose is running like a tap, blow it.

If you feel the impulse to put on cheap and strong perfume before you come, cap it.

If you have to listen to Taylor Swift, turn it down.

And finally, to a certain fellow scholar, please don’t pinch my ass in the crowded elevator.—Killam-me now

This article appears in Apr 1-7, 2010.

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10 Comments

  1. i don;t think these rules only apply to libraries…. these aer just general etiquette.
    perhaps you should have a sandwich board on at all times to let everyone know.

    if you want library etiquette…
    I’m talking No Masturbating to the national geographic, no talking in the quiet sections, and no getting it on in the dust sections where no-one ventures.

    Reply

  2. that wasn’t him…that was the elastic in you underwear giving out from the strain ! may it rest in piece.

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  3. heh…
    nothing like coming out and saying,
    “excuse me, I think you’re exceeding the weight limit for those pants.”

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  4. Only a certain fellow scholar? Does this mean the rest of are free to pinch your ass whenever we please? Ohhh, may just grab me some ass tonight at the library.

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  5. more stuff from the land of the lost causes. another bitch about libreraries, in a couple weeks, gee aren’t we fucking lucky here.

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  6. Koda…I think you’re missing the point…she means ANYone in a crowded elevator should not pinch her ass.

    However, in a fairly empty elevator I would say have at ‘er 🙂

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  8. Or everyone who frequents the library, do all three at the same time to seek out and destroy the OP.

    Reply

  9. LS… I think I’m beginning to see your side of things….
    I just have to be half drunk after a night of binging and still hungry because those stupid Bagel-fuls aren’t quite cutting it.

    congrats

    Reply
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