How many times have I spent money and time on some woman, finally gotten her into bed, only to find she’s one of those that needs “extra help” to finish, if you know what I mean. If I don’t go down there and put in some extra work beyond the usual call of duty, I’ll look like a selfish bastard. What gets me is that they’re not all like this. With some you have an easy, mutually satisfying good time. Why hasn’t natural selection eliminated these defective females?
OK, here’s my proposal. Fellas, if you find a girl like this, leave some indellible mark on a very visible part, like the face or hands, maybe with somehting like that ink they use to catch bank robbers. Eventually we’ll have them all labelled, and we can make informed decisions about exactly how much we want to invest.
This article appears in Apr 3-9, 2008.
HAHAHA, love it.You know, i’m just going to throw the obvious out there – I bet you’re just bad in bed. Sorry..because i’m sure you think you’re a pro, right? Once that 3 minutes is up and you’re satisfied you probably wanna roll over for a nap, while your other half is still laying there unfulfilled. It’s too bad there isn’t a marking system for the slacking dudes in bed, too. I’m sure your female companion felt cheated out of a few minutes too, when she could have gotten herself off a lot easier.
Hahaha I bet the ones you got off probably faked it.
How old are you? Just curious.
omg this is so funny
I don’t get it. Is this about sex?Seriously buddy, get in there and be a team player, or don’t play at all.
Female orgasm in humans has only a little effect on fertility, so there is no mechanism for natural selection to influence evolution one way or the other. Human sexuality is a rich and strange territory, and should be appreciated as such. And incidentally, I think natural selecton will be working against you when your attitude becomes apparent, lazy-boner.
I think “natural selection” works both ways in this case and it’s kind of ironic that the OP has labelled himself as a 2 pump chump.
It sounds like she couldn’t sustain that fantasy of Brad Pitt nearly long enough for you. Did she mention you sound like a bulldog in heat?
Well, since it only takes you one minute to finish, you gotta realize some girls take 2, and, wait for it, 5, and oh god this is pushing it, 10 minutes to finish! in fact what you refer to as a mutually satisfying good time might take an hour for an average female. learn some technique. Why hasn’t natural selection eliminated selfish pricks like you? And before you say anything I have a wife and a child, I don’t need to nudge nudge wink wink”spend money” on women.
So what constitutes ”extra work” in your mind, you ladykiller, you? Because if you see providing your lover with climax as being ”the usual call of duty”, and I emphasize your use of the word DUTY, then you’re probably either not a fan of sex to begin with, or you should be sleeping with someone other than a woman (perhaps a sheep). Handsome as you probably fancy yourself to be, you sound like the most un-erotic, unsexy, useless hunk of male flesh there is. ”Duty”, I’m still laughing over that one! Wow!
Man, I love chowing down on pussy, whats this guys problem?
hahaah
It’s idiots like you who also think that women were put on this earth for your satifaction only. If I had a man like you I’d take him into the back yard and shoot him, you worthless piece of s#$$%. Don’t let the name fool you, I’m a woman and I’d rather spend time with my vibrator than to even get naked with an ass like you.
yo asshole is your name OINK OINK? perhaps you should rethink your sexuality or better yet become celebate!(don’t have sex) you would better the women gender if you did!
hahahahahahahahahah, um, has it ever occurred to you that maybe it isn’t a treat to put your crusty, gym-sock-smelling member in our mouths either?!?!?!? yeah, i know, it must be SO hard to hold yourself in for more than 60 seconds, but sometimes we want a little more than a fleeting moment of you awkwardly thrusting your tiny penis while saying “yeah, feels good doesnt it?” um, no, it just kind of tickles. i know that when a man KNOWS what he’s doing, i have NO problem getting off. the ONLY time ive had a problem is when im sleeping with a guy who tries to make his 3 incher feel like a 7 by thrusting like theres no tomorrow.My man LIKES satisfying me, and because of that, i rock his world every night. so have fun jerking yourself off forever, you lazy small-dick bastard
I’m confused on part where you say she needs “extra help” to finish…uuuhh…she doesn’t need any of your help (and would be better off) and by the sounds of it you’re the one who needs to help and possibly an anatomy lesson too. Grow a real dick and then maybe you’ll be able to please a woman.