Dear hipsterbour; you’re really bad at guitar and singing. Like realllllly bad. You hear those laughs? I know you can. That’s me, laughing at you. I’m pretty sure I can play guitar better than you and I don’t even have one. Me, standing on a stage, doing nothing would get much more money than you playing your guitar on stage. You think you’d be good at it by now with all those weeknight jam sessions at midnight. If you’re seriously in a band, you probably should have thought about renting out a house instead of an apartment, you tool. It doesn’t matter if it’s daytime, you can’t crank your amps to 11.
For those about to say “GO AND TELL HIM TO SHUT UP AND STOP BITCHING”; It’s rude to insult one’s abilities….unless it’s on the internet. — F.P.
This article appears in Nov 18-24, 2010.
Hipsterbour. That made my day. For years I’ve been trying to think of the right title for those hacks crowding the Farmer’s Market with their ratty clothes and poor playing/singing.
wheee new words
Sounds like you need a pack of wolves and a plastic moon to drive him out.
yeah but shit o.p., this could be the re-incarnation of the pelvic one? either that, or they are scalding cats and use the guitar and singing as a cover story.
I know a few hipster types myself. They all claim to be in bands or have some kind of “art” project underway.
Upon closer investigation these things are usually either entirely imaginary, or if real, terribly sucky.
Fuck hipsters.
http://www.explosm.net/comics/2239/
Hehe, I enjoyed that Nevermind 🙂
so, you got drunk and sang at karaoke once or twice, you sing in the shower and in your car so now you think you know or HAVE what it takes to play the guitar and sing your own songs to people just like you… or to sing with a live band behind you, no teleprompter and a stage sound you’ll NEVER get used to but you think you should have an opinion on this…. really?!?
Here’s an opinion, OP, YOU ARE FUCKED IN THE HEAD. You’ve never held a guitar yet you dare to speak out of the side of your head on the matter. You deserve a real in your face BITCH SLAP but I’ll settle for the virtual kind today. You go stand on that stage for a whopping 5 minutes and THEN read this CRAP you’ve posted. Maybe by then you’ll have GROWN UP.
Actually, I used to play bass guitar but I said I didn’t “have” one not that I never held one. I can tell the difference between good guitar playing, alright guitar playing and then just really bad. My neighbour plays the really bad sort and likes to crank his amps up all the way in our APARTMENT building. Never sang at karaoke, don’t sing in the shower, sometimes sing in my car. I never said “hey hipster neighbour, I’m in a band and so are you and you suck and I don’t”. Much of what you say has nothing to do with what I said Kay so I’ll just assume you read it wrong and stop it right here.
hahahaha I’m pretty sure this is me! 1. I just bought a guitar at the beginning of the school year and have been trying to learn, 2. I have a terrible voice, but I live alone and like to sing along, didn’t think anyone could hear me, certainly didn’t hear anyone laughing 3. I don’t have an amp, but I do like to listen to my music pretty loud, I should really stop that I do live in an apartment building, woops, 4. As to how I dress, I guess hipster is my style……umm….sorry you don’t like how I dress…..?
Anyway I read this is in the real paper version tonight at Authentic K’s while getting food after smoking weed all evening, it was crazy! Super funny actually, we all got a pretty good laugh out of it! So here’s my official response I guess. Right, I’m sorry I can’t instantly be good at guitar and have to actually practice to get better, so I promise to play really really quietly until I’m better…… Umm, my bad though for playing late at night, I’ll definitely stop that, especially if you can hear me, and for that same reason i’ll stop singing too, trust me I know I’m bad, most people are. Otherwise yeah, I’m not in a band, just thought it’d be cool to learn guitar. I think you’re kind of a hater man, I mean I don’t even know you, you’re a faceless neighbour I’ve never met who’s writing hate about me over the internet. But I guess I should thank you after all, I mean I didn’t think people could hear me, that’s a pretty prime tip and honestly I’m embarrassed of it, so in the end we all win. Way to go internet-haterbour!