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Hey, am I wrong for this:
I am a married man, early 30’s, average guy.
Looking for a female to talk with and have a coffee.
Sometimes a new voice would be good. (and your right my spelling and grammar are bad)
—Looking for opion
This article appears in Mar 5-11, 2009.
16 Comments
Telling yourself a new voice would be good is a rationalization to yourself that you’re marriage is not sufficient. It’s definitely inappropriate if your wife doesn’t know.
Married men should be free to have coffee and talk to whomever they like. It really shouldn’t be an issue. But the fact that you’re asking if you are wrong for wanting this makes me think you feel guilty about it. Which makes me think there’s something else factoring in here. It would be easier to give an opinion with more information.
Grow some balls and sort out your personal issues with your wife, since it’s obvious you’re not just looking for small talk.
If your marriage was strong and stable right now, you wouldn’t have to ask yourself, or us, that question. Like Todd said, it really wouldn’t be an issue. I suggest you don’t avoid the real issue, whatever that may be, it’s cowardly.
My husband runs into acquaintances who may or may not be female and has coffee with them frequently. Neither of us think twice about this. But if my husband was looking for someone, someone female specifically to “talk” with, and kept it from me… I wouldn’t be pleased.
Sounds like you don’t like being married. I had coffee with a male friend last week but my spouse knew about it. If you can’t share that info with your wife, then maybe you should both sit down and have a serious talk.
Hey, this is your wife, asking the same question with the sexes reversed.
Two wrongs don’t make a right, but three rights make a left.
I’m with The Beav on this. Ask yourself how you would feel if the shoe was on the other foot. Imagine your wife seeking some other guy to have coffee with. Hey! It’s “just” coffee. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, right? Didn’t think so.
Something we can all agree on. Meeting a female acquaintance for coffee is fine, but actively seeking new women to have coffee with is sleazy.
I’m pretty sure you’re wife would rip a shit if she caught you doing this.
Sometimes just meeting new people makes you appreciate the one you have at home. I think it is ok.
this does sound a little bizarre.
why are you specifically seeking out more female companionship? I can see if you cross paths through having something in common…a bowling league or volunteer work or something… a meet and chat seems harmless enough but I don’t think “we both share a love for a cup of coffee” is quite going to cut it.
Married huh, why go out for coffee when you’ve got an espresso maker at home.
There are clearly issues at home here, and I think you ought to work them out. Females for coffee sounds too much like friends w/ benefits to me.
If you’re looking for a new voice you can’t be super happy in your marriage. I have nothing against my husband being friends with females, shmeh. But this seems like a sneaky and …weird.. way of going about it.
This is posted on the Love site as well, but he’s not getting any there either.
What’s an opion?