Today I was shopping looking for new clothes, when out of the blue some old bitch asked me in a loud booming voice, when I was due. I’m not even pregnant!! First of all, who the fuck asks strangers personal questions like that? Even if I was pregnant, it’s none of your business how far along a stranger is. How dare you, miserable old cow. Have you looked in a mirror lately, because you looked to be a size 16 yourself, honey. Next time keep your questions and your two fucking cents to yourself. You’re lucky I didn’t have PMS because baby you’re gonna catch the wrong bitch on the WRONG DAY! —You Ruined My Whopper Wednesday
This article appears in Dec 1-7, 2011.
i’m gonna hook you up with ttfn, she says priceless stuff, even at her ma’s funeral
Why don’t you Deal With It?
Getting angry at someone because they mistook your poor lifestyle for pregnancy and was just trying to be nice. Probably some lonely old woman who, instead of being the bitter old bitch you’ll age into, was trying to reach out and be nice and, yeah, maybe a little gauche but back in her day, obesity wasn’t the epidemic it is today.
If you’re so sensitive, do something about it. You can, you know. You don’t have to be fat. Nobody does. Sure it takes a ton of work and breaking of powerful addictions (sugar. Salt. MSG. Stress.) but you can do it if you want to. And if you don’t, then you have to deal with it.
and yeah. She probably HAS looked in a mirror lately which gives her the daily reality check that being an old lady, she can’t have kids anymore. Doesn’t mean she’s not allowed to mistake your girth for a belly. Especially if you’re that weird kind of fat that only affects the midsection. (For us women that’s unusual too.. I’m not overweight but if i do put on a pound or two, it’s always in my gut and i DO look pregnant so i know what i’m talking about)
Are you blonde OP? Kong doesn’t mind a bit of roundness, if you don’t mind a bit of fur…
You should have just politely said ” I’m sorry, my medical information is none of your business. “
No you deal with it OP. If your fat then it should be no surprise that some will think your prego.
Lol, maybe you are pregnant and just too fat to know it. They have a tv show about that, lol, too fat to realize you’re pregnant, lol.
LOL! Had that happen to me many years and many pounds ago…. I loved the expression on the well meaning lady’s face when I said: “I’m not pregnant, just fluffy”… still makes me smile when I think about it. 😀
This bitch made me LOL
Drive another whopper in your yap, and stfu you cranky bitch. Little touchy about your obesity, but jump all over an old lady that’s trying to be nice. Most pregnant women are gorgeous, she probably tried to pay you a compliment, only to have your sour-ass attitude beat her down. Go wallow in you trough and fuck off.
Kong is PISSED OFF that his bitch didn’t get uploaded.. maybe they ran out of time or something. Took me a right long time to type it out with my gigantic fingers, I just wanted to entertain you good folks. Kong sad…
Some people look fat.
Some people look pregnant.
It is my understanding that some women who have had children feel a kinship with other women who are presently pregnant.
It’s your choice to react to this like a bitch.
Get over yourself. There are real things out there worth being really offended by. This would seem to be kinda low on the list.
People are so Rude! Don’t let her bad eyesight and backwoods manners ruin your day!! Just another idiot!!
I’ve learned not to say anything other than “thanks” to strangers. Everybody’s happy.
IK — most women who gain weight only in their mid section have PCOS and it’s hard as HELL to lose that weight. No amount of dieting and exercise helps in some instances because of the massive amounts of insulin resistance. It’s all cause by a hormonal imbalance. Most women who have this can only lose weight by being put on an insulin sensitizer.
In any event, you probably DO look pregnant, OB. If you look pregnant, some people are going to think you ARE pregnant. Comes with having a fat gut. *shrug*
Why do fat people try to deny they’re fat? Deal with the reality and either embrace it or do something about it (and if you DO have PCOS, you can always try metformin, which helps with the resistance, but it doesn’t mean you don’t have to stop eating whoppers).
Have it Your Way
Metformin made my farts burst into smelly flames.
Not as fun as you’d think!
You could always wear a T shirt saying FAT, NOT KNOCKED UP
^^^ That would help to clear up any confusion, Baz. *thumbsup*
doooh
You sound like you need milking, you cranky bovine.
Rosie, I love your ‘fluffy’ comment – now THAT’s the way to handle such remarks from curious little old ladies.
Stop eating Whoppers, Stop being a strain on our health care system with your selfish eating habits. Get a hold of yourself. It is never too late to make a good decision. Start now.
Stop accepting your life of a cow, you are human.
“Why don’t you Deal With It?”
From the sound of it they already are.
“Stop accepting your life of a cow, you are human.”
Pfft. You can’t make a decent Whopper with humans. The meat is too stringy for starters.
so you can either not take metformin, be fat, and smell like grease…
or take metformin, be thin, and smell like shitty farts…
hmmmmm….which is the lesser evil?
http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/856/387/126/r…
http://vsm.com–live.com/admin/uploads/epi…
if she thought you was preggy, then you must look the part.but saying that shit to someone, could get you a punch in the teeth. moreso if a younger male would have been close by. good thing you didn’t say that in my earshot. i would have ripped your fucking ass off.
http://wtfcontent.com/img/130201190982.jpg
“so you can either not take metformin, be fat, and smell like grease…
or take metformin, be thin, and smell like shitty farts…
hmmmmm….which is the lesser evil?”
That side effect of metformin is only temporary for most and in a lot of cases can be avoided by starting with 1/2 pill doses.
I take four metformin pills a day and I don’t have any side effects. 🙂
If you don’t like it OB, then put the fork down and go on a damn diet. I would have asked when your litter is due.
PK, ya knows I lurves ya – and I would never call you out publicly, ever.
But sometimes you talk about your G.I. tract like it was The Genesis Cave and you were Dr. Carol Marcus:
http://images.wikia.com/memoryalpha/en/ima…
“Can I cook, or can’t I?”
Okay – how many Of Col. Ivan’s Nerdnaz got that reference? >: )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRnSnfiUI54
I find that happens with every major nutritional alteration from the daily norm.
example… step 1. eat no mexican food for at least 2 months.
step 2. each 6 spicy tacos with hot sauce in 1 sitting.
step 3. http://www.fartsandburps.net/page2/files/f…
I have the opposite problem. I’m 7 months pregnant and don’t have the high, really-sticking-out-in-your-face, basketball-like stomach, so people just think I’m really fat. They always look relieved when I mention I’m pregnant, as if they were kind of wondering/hoping, but not quite sure.
Is pk’s name gail, cause i know an abusive abandoning mother who allowed her son to be abused while she started a new family like most whores do, if so die ya stupid cunt, one day ur gonna get ur fuckin payment. On this issue with the fat bitch who don’t wanna have anyone say stupid stuff, well how bout u stop being a fat cunt maybe, I mean if someone walks into a store covered in shit , im saying something, you are full of shit so why should something not be said to your fat ass, im personally tired of seeing you fat Wales flopping around stores taking up 3 seats on buses. I’ll tell ya, when fat ppl try to sit beside me on buses, I tell them simply, no you are too fat, and are in my space, stand fatty maybe it’ll do ya some good.
“im personally tired of seeing you fat Wales flopping around stores taking up 3 seats on buses. “
Jim, surely you know Wales is part of the United Kingdom you even capitalized it. She’s not as big as that. Surely you were speaking of a cetacean.
http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/anim…
I think it was the spellchecker trying to figure out what the fuck he’s saying…
to little success….
and no-one’s surprise.
and how the hell does
“I’d like for people not to mistakenly mention that I’m pregnanct”
translate into
“I should stop being a fat cunt”
???
It’d be nice if you had two brain cells to rub together…
and an advanced, highly conscious grammar and spellchecker to decipher what in the fuck you could possibly be thinking.
I guess I’ll have to get out the knuckle-dragging-redneck-piece-of-trash to English dictionary.
nice whale troodon, i presume the chocolate orange is just for festivus and you will bring back a critter soon^^
Yes the chocolate orange is just temporary, the bobcat kitten will make his/her triumphant return.
I’m on metaphormin right now and I already lost 6 lbs!!
Ooops.
I just sharted.