I love and miss you endlessly. My eyes ache when having to be cast away from your grace. To quote a lunatic, you complete me. Always, Your sexy pirate non-snoring beaut of a woman. <3 I love you. —Maarrrry Me! (Dartmouth)
This article appears in May 2-8, 2013.


Dartmouthy is proposing?Whose the lucky lady Dartmouthy?
Pirate of a woman? She has a peg leg? Parrot? Eyepatch? Maybe she just illegally downloads songs and movies. What makes a pirate of a woman?
LOL Reg! Was wondering the same thing.
I’m going with the sword….
http://a.onionstatic.com/images/articles/a…
@ Reg and Hoist: also my first thought–lol 😉
@ Zedster: not surprised–if the fairer sex took my fancy, then I would definitely ‘go with the [ahem] sword’ as well;D