I am so tired of all the sexism. I’m tired of people making light of sexual assault. I’m tired of people blaming the victims and defending the rapists. I’m tired of people saying rape is a “grey area”. I’m tired of slut shaming, rape culture, and patriarchy. I’m tired of being called a feminazi whenever I dare to use those words, thanks Rush Limbaugh.
I have been grabbed by strange men crowded in bars. A man tried to untie my sister’s top while seated behind her. One of my friends was beaten up by a guy after she refused to go home with him. I had to get my cousin home safely after someone roofied her at a bar. My former roommate was raped while passed out at a party.
Almost every girl I know has at least one story to tell about being sexually assaulted, and all of them have stories about sexism. Sexism is everywhere in our culture. Your mothers, sisters, nieces, aunts, wives, girlfriends, and daughters encounter it every day.
Most of all, I’m tired of being talked over by men when I have something to say about the issue. Guys, I try to be patient, because I know that you have no idea what it’s like to be female in this society. I try to be patient because I know that you understandably feel a bit defensive when the topic of sexism comes up. But please, next time a woman in your life has something to say about the subject, just listen to her. The next time a member of any oppressed group (be they women, ethnic minorities, LBGTQ people, disabled people, little people etc.) is talking about issues that affect them, just listen to what they have to say.
Please just listen.
To the men who already have, thank you so much. —a woman
This article appears in Sep 5-11, 2013.
As a young woman employed in the early 1970s, I encountered sexism in every facet of my life. However, having grown up with boys as my best buddies, I learned to stand up for myself and, if said man didn’t get the message, I made it clear. Case in point: It’s 1974 and I’m on a footstool with a short skirt on trying to find a file. Assistant manager grabs me by the ass, I march off the stool, grab him by the front of his shirt and throw him against the nearest wall. Then got him fired. If more women hiked up their tits and told these ‘evil’ men exactly where they fucking stood, they wouldn’t get harassed nearly as much. If you can’t punch ’em out physically, do it verbally and MAKE YOURSELF HEARD!
well, that can work sometimes. and sometime you get belted across the face and then fired.
certainly helps if you grew up rough n tumble with brothers, but if you didn’t, and don’t have the physical skills to punch ’em, it’s NOT YOUR FAULT for not being able to stop them. it’s NOT womens/girls fault that some men are creeps.
I know that decent men get defensive when women talk about this. but you don’t have to be. it’s not directed at YOU, but we do need to speak about it.
like the ‘black like me’ book, you have to be in that person’s skin to experience it, and that’s just not possible. even if you, decent man, could dress up and ‘pass’ as a woman for a day of walking around you wouldn’t be carrying the 20, 30 40 or 50 years of day by day experience and knowledge that makes you suddenly decide to take another elevator if the doors open and there’s a man alone in the elevator. you can’t ‘remember’ those times hearing footsteps behind you on the street at night, or hearing the laundry room door open and getting that frisson of fear wondering if the person coming in is male or female.
men wandering about doing their daily life fear the approach of some tough looking gang. women (if they have any street sense at all) have to initially fear the approach of every man between the ages of 14-75.
decent men have told me how offended they are when walking along a street at night an approaching woman will cross over. fellows, if it were your sister or daughter, would you want her to take that chance? dads, you know what you think about every 16 yr old pimply faced stud muffin who wants to date your daughter. just think of all women as some dad’s daughter. tell her to cross the street. and if some decent man is offended at being ‘stereotyped’ tell him her safety is not worth his 2 minutes of affront. really, he should understand. look how cute ted bundy was.
Boo hoo fucking hoo – I’m a poor little woman, I’m a victim – Jesus H. Fucking Cripes, get a better strategy, ladies, instead of this constant, mind-numbing bleating. If you can’t show another person you mean business if they cross that line, then brush up on your confidence skills and don’t put yourself in potentially dangerous situations.
And let us never forget that there are plenty of nasty, soulless twats out there who make it their life’s calling to set up some poor dude, poop out a few babies and ta-da! She’s set up for life whether she stays with him or not. Some of those lovelies have physically & emotionally brutalize friends of mine – in one such case, my friend’s partner punched herself in the face a few times, then called the cops on him – with further investigation, it turned out this ‘little woman’ had a long record of abusing her male partners and calling the cops that the reverse was actually happening. It may not be as common to hear about this but only because many males are too ashamed to admit that their woman wailed on them.
Both sexes have a lot to answer for, IMHO.
As far as the issue of rape goes, may I suggest #5:
http://www.oddee.com/item_98705.aspx
Internalized misogyny and victim blaming. I am just so shocked right now.
OB hit the nail on the head.
OP thank you
Instead of teaching women/girls to protect ourselves against rape, teach men it’s NOT ok to rape women/girls.
No offense TT but rapists usually don’t stop to put on a condom before the forced penetration.A woman/girl can hold a black belt in karate and still be a victim of rape.
ttfn, I surely would like you to tell me what confidence building skills you would suggest, or what avoidance of dangerous situations you could offer a woman who was assaulted in her own home by a stranger who broke in and held her there for three days. what patented TT FN tough woman moves would she have used on the rapist to prevent him from cutting off her nipples with a knife. I guess hiking up her tits wouldn’t have worked so well after that. I guess its her fault that she was so weak and poor me victim that gave him the idea he could just stay in her house for 3 days having his jollies with her. he left her a fucking vegetable.
me, I left a metal nail file embedded in a potential rapists neck when he tried to pull me into his car while I was crossing a bridge at night. me, I walked 10 miles home after being thrown from a car when I wouldn’t come across. I stood up to him, but it could have ended differently if he had decided to have his fun and then throw me out. me, I tough talked my way out when 2 guys cornered me. me, I held the door against some creep trying to get into my house when my kids were babies. I stood up to a guy holding a rifle at me. I have been tough and brave in situations you cannot imagine but i will NOT belittle women who have not been able to do the same. sometimes brave words and hard attitude are not enough. sometimes the guy just hits you with a 2 by 4 and all the fight just kind of dissolves out of you.
your friends situation does not wipe out ‘the other side’. I know that abuse happens on both sides, but I won’t belittle your friends situation and make light of it.
WOW…. just… WOW.
I agree with everything OP said, except ‘slut shaming’. I find this one hard to swallow – maybe I am not clear on what ‘slut shaming’ actually is. We can also operate under the assumption that ‘sluts’ can be members of either gender, right? Sure, it’s your right to be a slut and dress/act like a sex obsessed tramp but it’s also my right to think your gross and possibly full of diseases.
Hoist “Sluts” were always thought to be mainly women not men. if a female enjoys sex with multiple partners she’s a ‘slut’ ;if a male enjoys sex with multiple partners he’s a “stud”.
As you eluded to the word “slut” brings with it a slew of negative thoughts, but what connotations does the word “stud” bring with it..macho,experienced,lucky,etc.There’s a huge double standard.
As a female why should I be thought of as dirty,disease ridden for enjoying sex while as a male you be thought of as macho,lucky for enjoying sex??
That shit just ain’t right.
IS MALE SEXISM AN INSOLUBLE SOCIAL PROBLEM?
“Guys, I try to be patient, because I know that you have no idea what it is like to be female in this society.” a woman
“The essence of pornography is inspired by the unbridled male fantasies of power and dominance over the female.” Montrealman (“50 Shades of Red,” 09/07, 9:30AM)
My point in linking these two quotations is to indicate that the two concepts, sexism and pornography, are inextricably linked. While they are distinguishable in terms of their misogynistic intensity they reside on a continuum which colours the male view of the female. At one end of the continuum there is the rapist or even the murderer while at the other end there is the Casanova, the legendary lover of females. (Or was his “love” just another form of disguised aggression?) The various manifestations of sexism occupy the middle range of the continuum. So sexism exists as the male default position. It is part of what it means to be male and, by extension, what it means for the female to be female. But where did it come from and can it be modified?
We are a gendered species which relies on sexual intercourse for procreation. However, given the mechanics of sexual intercourse, the roles of the male and female are asymmetrical. The male is the active agent – he was made to go out and get her! – while the female is the passive, receptive agent. She was made to be accommodating since that is the only way the species will persist. So if there is an innate gender asymmetry at the outset, depending on the psychology of the male it won’t take much for this imbalance to be distorted into sexism. So male sexism, in one form or another, is there. But can it be modified?
It’s difficult to see how. Possibly with the ascendancy of feminism together with the rise in the numbers of females attending university and entering the workforce above the service and secretarial level, the gender imbalance might be modified but there does appear to be a direct inverse correlation between sexism on the one hand and educational and occupational success on the other which can be put in a simple formula: The intensity of the male’s sexism is inversely proportionate to his educational and occupational attainment.
But educational and occupational attainment are, in their turn, foundational for male psychological health and well-being with the dismal conclusion that there will always be a male demographic rump which remains untouchable in terms of its ingrained sexism. A dismal conclusion perhaps, but one which appears to be evidentially supported and so roughly accurate. Male sexism, at least in the case of the lower orders, is therefore an insoluble social problem.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
when I first heard the phrase ‘slut shaming’ I was kind of offended, until I realized what it really was. (or I suppose more to the point, when it is used by intelligent people instead of hillbillies or middle America beauty queens or religious fundamentalists)
it’s taking the word SLUT and throwing it back at anyone who uses it as a derogatory term to describe a woman who is not married, but has sex and most importantly, someone who has pissed them off in some way. they spit SLUT at women as a shaming tool. like a pack of hyenas, or those bearded women in life of brian. hysterical, spitting, sanctimonious and hypocritical. and the spitting and screaming is like an old fashioned stoning.
so your boyfriend breaks up with you and you scream SLUT at his new girl.
you get all your friends to scream SLUT at her too. she gets stoned on social media, in the halls, in texts.
some guys yell SLUT if they couldn’t get her, or if they did. with those guys, it really doesn’t matter which.
the thing is, the word slut is thrown at just about anyone. but with the intention of publicly shaming them for sexual activity. implying they are gross and disgusting, when all she may have done is walk past someone’s boyfriend and he looked at her.
the ridiculous part of the ‘slut shaming’ to me, is that it reeks of salem witch hunts, a puritanical attitude of hysteria surrounding women, and by women pandering to men, about men, in competition for men. it does not have to get triggered by some red flagged jezebel prancing down main street giving blow jobs to every man she sees. its about jealousy, resentment, small mindedness, and squinty eyed bitchiness.
What I am saying, WAC, is that anyone who has a ton of sex with multiple partners is gross – regardless of gender. The fact that I am a man who would not date a woman who has had copious amounts of penis is irrelevant and I don’t care how many feminists want to make me feel bad for it. I would expect any self-respecting female to think the same of a potential partner’s promiscuity and I would also expect that they would be allowed to hold these opinions without being labeled as sexist. I am responsible for myself and my own actions, not the actions of every other member of my gender in this society. The same goes for women-folk. And yeah, sorry, sluttly people are a little gross. Both men and women.
I’m tired of reverse sexism 🙁
I had another comment to make, but I guess I’ll be on my way to save the world somewhere else.
I agree Hoist, to a point. I like to think that my morals makes me want to be and feel like the one and only, not one of many. Society or people’s perception has made relationships so casual these days, almost like changing socks. The very fibre of being in a loving relationship with two people seems to have gone awry into sex and lust moments. When they tire of this one, they move to the next. I see elderly couples sometimes that belie that fact. Even after any of my relationships went sour, I would never belittle them or call them names..or sexist comments. As proof I am BFF with my ex.
What in the fuck @T.T. Fonebone’s sexist comments. What garbage.
Well-spoken response GDM…
Some of these comments on here…wow (I’m looking at you TT).
Thanks GDM & others for attempting to bring some realism into this argument. And thanks to the OB for speaking out.
I tried to type out some kind of comment to express the level of fury I’ve felt this week, but I’m just too angry to comment on this bullshit. I can’t even.
But I will say one thing:
I was a passenger in a taxi some years ago when the driver jumped me and shoved his tongue down my throat.
Whatever logic brought him to this decision, I don’t know – and frankly, it doesn’t matter at this point. I know that I didn’t come onto him or flirt with him. He wanted to chat. I chatted back and was friendly. That’s it. (Furthermore, I was with my bf when he’d picked me up).
I’m a fiesty person, I’m athletic and fit. I generally have good instincts. I tried to push him off of me but quickly realized how strong he was, that there was absolutely no way in hell I could ever get him off without things escalating into some serious violence. And I don’t know if I would’ve been able to walk away from that. All of this flashed through my somewhat intoxicated brain in a split second.
I decided to ‘gently’ resist, smiling awkwardly as I paid him and stepped out of the vehicle. The whole thing was over in 1-2 minutes.
He’d dropped me off in front of my place and I realized that I’d left the light on in my apartment. So when I got up to my apartment, I crawled around on my hands and knees so that he wouldn’t know which one was mine.
It’s good that I did because he came back later that night and sat outside, beeping his horn (others in my very small apt bldg told me this the next day).
I’m telling this story because of your comments, TT.
If I had done as you would have suggested, I very well may not have made it out ok. Sure, he was “kind enough” to stop but if I had made a fuss, who knows. If I’d acted angry, he probably would’ve gotten angry, too. After all, anyone entitled enough to pull a stunt like that probably isn’t going to react too well when rejected harshly.
So, I did what I did and people like you have the fucking nerve to blame others who’ve been in situations like mine and call us ‘weak’.
Fuck your comments.
Oh and like OB, I know far too many friends and relatives who’ve had much more damaging experiences than mine.
Mine’s like a walk in the park compared to most of the women’s experiences I’m thinking of. Most of them weren’t in a position to do a helluva lot of “fighting back” as TT describes it, or tried and were unsuccessful – hence the rage.
Yeah, well, I have three guys try to rape me when I was young and I fought each one of those bastards, one I had to stab in the thigh with my house keys before fleeing his car. A perfect stranger grabbed me the tit when I was 13 and wanted to ‘date me’ – broad daylight on Connolly Street, he wouldn’t let me go – kick in the fucking shin that time. My cousin tried to rape me, I screamed like a banshee and fought that son of a bitch like my leg was being sawed off. My aunt’s boyfriend forced me on his lap with a raging hard on and wouldn’t let me get up. I dug my nails in his hands as hard as I could to get away.
I also had friends who have been brutally raped, one by a Haitian who now is a nurse at a well-known seniors home. My best friend in high school was raped by her brother and I could continue for an hour on the people I knew who were abused, raped and beaten. Each and every one of them rose above their situation, refusing to let it define them. I am what I am, folks, and I will fight to the death if anyone attempts to physically control me.
And, WAC, if you had READ about that condom, you would have realized that the female wore it, not the male. Do you just look at pictures or what?
Nobody ever tryed/wanted to rape me 🙁
tt if you can continue for an hour about friends who have been abused, raped or beaten, then you have just confirmed the OP premise. it’s friggin everywhere we are. in the home, at school, on the street. from strangers, from relatives, from friends, teachers.
and like OP, and myself, and anyone else here who has been raped, abused, beaten or threatened, it does NOT define us. however it does make us constantly aware and angry when told (perhaps not meant that way) that it’s a piece of cake to escape that beating, rape or abuse.
the fact that all those people you know did actually get raped or beaten means that despite their resistance, it happened. sometimes you can fight for your life, but if 4 guys are holding your arms and legs while the 5th takes his turn, you simply cannot escape it. or if you are 7, and the attacker is 65. of if you are in a wheelchair, or blind, or drunk or sick to death from the flu, or heavily pregnant. or if you are just terrified to death and frozen with fear.
TT you cannot be telling women that if they got raped, and lived that they simply didn’t fight hard enough? is survival a display of weakness? do you have contempt for their need to stay alive for children or for their own future and to submit when a knife is at their throat?
each of us makes those decisions in a split second under hideous circumstances. I cannot shame any girl or woman for her decision. sometimes I fought. sometimes I couldn’t. sometimes I escaped, and sometimes I didn’t. there is no one answer fits all. if you run into one that needs the woman to fight you will die.
Nothing wrong with being a slut as long as you’re a responsible slut. If you enjoy sex and have the ability to attract multiple partners, good for you. However, there should be ground rules to try and avoid emotional conflict and obviously protection to avoid inflicting STDs on somebody. Being a slut male or female does not mean you deserve a medal any more than I should for drinking copious amounts of coffee but you shouldn’t be considered a blight either.
How many women are subject to harrassment and violence from “amourous” men is shocking judging by the post and comments. I find it hard to speak to because I don’t function that way myself and I haven’t witnessed it from anyone I know. The solution? I don’t know because I always thought we were making a lot of progress in the area of women’s rights and sensitivity towards women’s issues. Especially with the younger generation. Then the SMU chant happened. I was gob-smacked by that event and I still can’t believe it.
Here’s the thing, GDM – I don’t particularly like most women, simple as that. My worst experiences in childhood were female based – from a critical, controlling mother who was physically abusive to a half dozen girl bullies who made my junior high years a living hell and gave me confidence problems for years. At uni, the early feminists were total wing nuts – even some of my girlfriends condemned me if I had a boyfriend and would proceed to pick apart his character despite not knowing him a notch. I spent the last 25 years of my work life with men because my experience with working among women never went well – most were backstabbing gossips with some kind of hidden agenda I didn’t want to know about.
The women I do admire are the ones who aren’t whining and whinging about this never ending battle between the sexes – we all look forward, not back – as long as we’re treated with respect, no prob. If not, then it’s gonna be a BIG problem and we won’t be silent.
Not like my poor ex-husband who stayed silent as his third much younger wife beat him to the floor at the Bank of Montreal and pummelled him until security had to drag this red headed fiend off him. He croaked a few months later, probably believing this was the only way he could escape her abuse.
Women need to always have a Plan B and C in their heads in case of bad situations.
Reg, condoms don’t protect you against every form of sexually transmitted disease and they don’t always work. I don’t expect women (or men) to be pure, that’s just crazy. But going out and picking up a new partner ever week is gross. That’s my opinion and I’m sticking to it. If a woman chooses to do this, that’s fine – I don’t call people names…but I wouldn’t want her to be my girlfriend (I don’t sleep around either). It seems you can’t have this opinion without people jumping down your throat accusing you of being sexist and that’s a little annoying, especially since I made it pretty clear that I don’t condone a double standard where men are involved.
“why should I be thought of as dirty,disease ridden for enjoying sex while as a male you be thought of as macho,lucky for enjoying sex” …… Nowhere did I say that men should be considered macho, etc for enjoying sex…NOR did I say that women should be considered dirty or disease ridden for enjoying sex. Rather, I said ANYONE who has sex with a ton of different people on a regular basis is gross. You can see how those two things are completely different, right?This is exactly the thing that annoys me about ‘feminism’.
reg, you (and my brother and someone who looks like my brother, and my ex husbands and my sons and many many other wonderful men that I know) are the ‘decent’ men I refer to. if I may use the word you used to illustrate the gulf.
you said ‘amorous men’ and there’s the rub. they are not looking for love or even sex. they hate women. resent women. loathe women. they want to hurt, humiliate and shame women.
I have thought about this, read different thing for many years trying to figure it out. here’s my half assed theory. it’s going to sound a little MM. men have urges for women. call it procreation, whatever. they have to have what women have. ‘unfortunately’ for those men, women, esp nowadays in the western world, have the ability to say no. some men build a world of resentment towards women for this slap in the face. saying no. denying them what they ‘must have’. jokes like ‘what’s the definition of a woman? – life support system for a cunt’. one would think that all men would worship women for the pleasure and joy that lying together can bring. uh uh. hatred. resentment. and add to all that life’s everyday resentments. lousy job. bad traffic. team lost. indigestion. whatever. those men pile it onto the handy target of women. if women weren’t so uppity he would have a better job. if women weren’t out in the world taking good jobs away from men he would make more money. his boss humiliated him and he can’t even get a blow job from the bitch next to him at the bar. and so on and so on. rape is not about some guy needing to ejaculate. there are paid services for that. it’s about humiliation, power, control, hatred, resentment and *making her* submit to his will, taking away her sovereignty over her own body because it makes him feel POWERFUL and in control. of something at least. and dammit, its just so accepted. it’s so OK. no shame to it (for him) and what proves its acceptance utterly is that bloody smoo chant. all those hurt faces when confronted with their filth. (yup, I will use that word to describe what they said) ‘jaw drops and tears’ oh you filthy despicable little creeps. you sell-out young women who sang along to get acceptance and approval from those worthless boys. that chant going public is like someone squeezing a blackhead that just keeps spewing and squirting pus and putridity for miles. they saw nothing wrong with those words. nothing. god help us all as a human race. this has been going on for centuries.
so reg, and all the other decent men, it is because you are decent that you are gobsmacked. you cannot imagine the cesspool that is within their minds. so many of them.
TTFN, I don’t like most women either. and I don’t like most men. I don’t like most humans. I am just not comfortable around them, have no urge to do what makes humans want to congregate or seek each other out.
however, I also realize that I have a huge emotional filter affecting my attitude towards people, and do try to adjust for it. I certainly wouldn’t tout it as a reasonable way of living for other people. that’s my own ‘shit’. it’s my frame of reference coloured by my life. you have yours. it’s not going to fit other people, so why insist they wear it?
i like some people, and i can usually suss that out quite quickly
Absolutely, GDM – after all, we are a sum total of our experiences. Maybe I’ve just met more nasty, abusive women than nasty, abusive men over the decades. When you get down to it, it’s all pretty subjective.
And I agree with you, Painey, I get vibes upon meeting anyone – like the women of our Summits, yourself included – all amazing, accomplished females that I’m proud to call my friends. From the moment I met you ladies, there were good vibes all ’round. We’re essentially all on the wave length, despite our varying ages. Straight shooters, no bullshit – I fucking love ’em all (and all da boys as well).
Throughout history, it has always been the woman who has the last word on mates. You could have 1000 men lined up wanting a specific girl, only for her to choose only one or none. It’s just the way life goes as it’s in women’s DNA makeup. Men think differently, they either want to procreate or just have sex for the sake of having sex and believe women are only here to please and do man’s bidding.
Women on the other hand want a mate that will be a good provider to her and her kids,(long before that even happens). Some guys resent that about women on their ability to choose, they feel inferior and some even resent them to the point of behaving badly to fulfill and satisfy their own weaknesses and shortcomings. Not to say it’s in man’s DNA makeup, many factors can influence their decisions, (product of environment for example).
By raping and torturing them, they feel they are the all powerful being that men are suppose to portray, but sadly at the expense of dehumanizing and demoralizing women,(not to mention the physical, emotional and mental trauma they place on women who then have nightmares, mistrust and stigmas for the rest of their lives. IMHO, if It can’t be truly consensual, GUYS, go get a hooker and leave these women be.
i think some people are stupid shits, they may be men or women
I hugely 2nd that emotion, Painey.
you are a keeper and so is good dog
My use of “amourous” was intentionally understated Molly as I couldn’t think of quite the right word for this type of sexual aggression. It’s not sex or foreplay but it is violence and aggression. Unless there are thousands of 6′ 6″, 300 lb men out there with a taste for raping other men, a lot of men won’t get this. I really do not believe that being held down and anally violated by some big hairy man would be most guy’s idea of sex.
Meaty perhaps excluded.
Hoist
“”why should I be thought of as dirty,disease ridden for enjoying sex while as a male you be thought of as macho,lucky for enjoying sex” …… Nowhere did I say that men should be considered macho, etc for enjoying sex…NOR did I say that women should be considered dirty or disease ridden for enjoying sex. Rather, I said ANYONE who has sex with a ton of different people on a regular basis is gross. You can see how those two things are completely different, right?This is exactly the thing that annoys me about ‘feminism’.”
Hoist you said-
“…but it’s also my right to think your gross and possibly full of diseases.”
I understood what you were saying. I happen to agree with what you said.
Generally people see female and male promiscuity differently,was the point I TRIED to make.
A ‘slut’ is a ‘slut’ is a ‘slut’ no matter what the gender.
Nope. Sluts can’t be male, you silly woman. Sluts can ONLY be female and, that word is reserved for women who have been with more than one sex partner. Choose wisely ladies, you only have one shot at it!!!
gad, spoken like the *real* Stephen harper! good job!
Klyde “By raping and torturing them, they feel they are the all powerful being that men are suppose to portray, but sadly at the expense of dehumanizing and demoralizing women,(not to mention the physical, emotional and mental trauma they place on women who then have nightmares, mistrust and stigmas for the rest of their lives. IMHO, if It can’t be truly consensual, GUYS, go get a hooker and leave these women be.”
Please clarify your last statement. Do you condone men assaulting prostitutes instead of they’re significant other?
Men even if your renting a piece of ass it’s not ok to abuse it.
I don’t condone violence against men or women on any level but if they just want to use someone as a sex toy, play with hookers, hookers come in all fantasies to suit men. Or women. As I have stated in other posts, I’m not afraid or ashamed to speak the truth. I had a relationship before where I was the person who suffered physical, mental and emotional abuse (it does go both ways) at the hands of a control freak…so I know how other people feel about this. Took a long time to rid myself of this person and to this day, other people still tell me this person still loves me (YEAH RIGHT). Is that enough clarification WAC?
Yes, GDM. Jesus shines his guiding light, and like a moth, I have no choice but to follow. All of the worlds problems are women’s fault, cause you took the first bite of the apple. Vile temptresses!!!!
The Captain has never, personally, witnessed acts of sexual aggression towards women. In days gone by this led to the belief that the issue was not as severe and prevalent as it actually was. The same can be said for racism; Having not experienced or witnessed something personally, The Captain was easily lead to not believe in that thing. Or to at least not treat the issue seriously, as it deserves. Having never spoken to God, or A god, you can see how it’s easy to dismiss the whole notion of one.
This lever of ignorance has since fled with age.
I don’t believe that you can blame an entire gender for sexism. Especially when you always apply the caveat that these messages DO NOT APPLY TO DECENT MEN. Any idea how many ‘Decent Men’ are out there? A lot. The Captain would dare to say the majority of them are ‘decent men’. The same can be said about Women, of course. Most women are exceptionally lovely ladies.
But, the ones we hear about, the ones we ‘experience’, are the ones that form our prevailing opinions. We think a lot of men are sexist bastards, that’s all we ever hear about, sooo…? And all women are up-tight prudes who suck the souls out of men or are sluts intent only on losing their virginity ASAP and gold-digging some poor ol’ SOB.
This is obviously, and painfully, untrue.
(Disclaimer: This does not include young adults between the ages of 16-22 – as this age group is supremely fucked up in N.A. and in dire need of a educational and social overhaul; Research the SMU chant that’s hit the Top 10 list this week. There were plenty of Male and Female Frosh leaders directing this chant (which means they probably read it beforehand so cannot plead ignorance to its content))
There is a plethora of commonality between Men and Women, unfortunately most of our common traits aren’t physical so we quickly discount them in favor of the more obvious differences of our physical bodies. Plenty of Women behave ‘like a man’ and plenty of Men behave ‘like a lady’.
RSVP
: GDM (09/08, 4:17PM)
Well yes, Good dog, you do “sound a little like MM” with whom, if I understood the thrust (!) of your argument, you agree. But see “The Coquette,” my latest post on “I Suck at Flirting” where, in my usual masterful manner, I delineate the contours of the abusive female sexist who is the mirror-image of the abusive male sexist.
Like you I was shocked at the sexism on the SMU campus, particularly because it is one of the universities from which I graduated. (There were, of course, three others, from one of which I graduated twice. We must never forget that.) Anyway, I’m thinking of taking a pass the next time they have a telephone for alumni financial support.
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
** um, that should read “telephone CAMPAIGN for alumni financial support.”
Oh my, a degree from Robe Street High? I’m sure you cover that puppy up when real philosophers have their important pow-wows in your office. Do you cover it with your Sesame Street colouring degree?
Klyde Thank you for clarifying.
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: Stephen Harper (09/09, 10″08AM)
Read my post over again, Stephen. Saint Mary’s was only one of four universities from which I graduated, and I graduated from one of the three others twice! Can you believe it?
I know Stephen, it’s okay. You just didn’t understand. God, it feels good to be superior!
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!